It's been 4 months since my boyfriend had a relapse. After his last relapse, he decided to change his life. He moved away from the place that he always did his drugs with (12 hours away). Took on a new and important position with a company he really wanted to work for. I can see the clarity in his eyes again. I can see that he is happy again. It was many years of misery that he went through with addiction to crack. But he goes through a day here and there where he says the urge is incredible to do it again, but says he doesn't want to lose all that he's got back in his life after hitting rock bottom and losing EVERYTHING. He always fights it. And he has learned to talk to me about it so that he's not alone in his fight. When do these urges go away? When will he/we feel safe that our lives won't be destroyed by a relapse. I am a nurse, but addiction is not my area of expertise. I worry for him. I am really hoping that our day will come that this will be far behind us. Does this ever go away?
It does go away eventually. I was addicted to the same drug for many years. I have been clean for a number of years. I used to get incredible cravings, urges for about 6 to 8 months, then I would get urges but not so severe and now nothing. I get thoughts every once in awhile when I am depressed or stressed but they are only from habit as that is where my mind is used of going but, they are not cravings or urges and I have done alot of treatment to learn how not to act out on them. I will give you some techniques to share with him to help him through the physical urges that last a short time. One thing I use to do is, the second I felt the urge I would sit on a chair, put my feet flat on the floor look straight ahead, without moving my head, I would say aloud Ten things I could see...ten things I could hear...ten things I could feel. For example...my cat, my computor....car driving by, female voice, ...a breeze on my arm, an itch on my head. This will take you out of the thought...I would use another technique that you might be familiar with...Square breathing...Breath in to the count of 4..hold for the count of 4...breath out for the count of 4...hold for the count of 4. I would also suggest that he seek friendship and support in a 12 step group.