Good Morning ALL,
Thanks so much for each of your respones to my major crash on Saturday.
I am very much considering going to my first meeting tonight but could use some advise. This will be an open speaker meeting. Is it best to go by yourself the first few times or take someone with you. I believe I would prefer to go alone.
Any sugguestions on your experiences with this?
Thanks
Tremor
Tremor...
hey! I haven't been to a meeting yet, but, I think you SHOULD definitely trust this instinct that is telling you to go. That is you gut talking and that is the voice in your head you should be listening to....
I know it will be hard to do......but make yourself do it.......have as much compassion for you as you did for that guy at the dumpster.....
Hang in there......praying for your health,
not feeling clever
hey! I haven't been to a meeting yet, but, I think you SHOULD definitely trust this instinct that is telling you to go. That is you gut talking and that is the voice in your head you should be listening to....
I know it will be hard to do......but make yourself do it.......have as much compassion for you as you did for that guy at the dumpster.....
Hang in there......praying for your health,
not feeling clever
Hi Tremor! Good to hear you sounding better today;)
I'm really glad you're thinking about going to a meeting. I think it is a very good idea. I don't go as often as i should but i'm going to start going ALOT more often now. But i have been to a few in the past. (probably 20) I'm sure there are people on here that can give you more advice than i can but i'll share what it was like for me the first time.
I went by myself, and I was scared to death just like you...it took everything i had to drive to that place and even more to get out of my van and walk up to the door. I managed to walk through the door, with shakey knees and sweaty hands
not knowing what to expect for sure.
As soon as i walked through that door, i felt comfortable. There, right in front of me, was a room full of people who had been, or were, exactly where i was. They make you feel so comfortable, and you don't have to talk at all, if you don't want to. No one is going to put you down, or make you feel like a failure. They will only give you love and support and share their experience, strength and hope.
I was soooo glad i didn't chicken out that night. I had myself all worked up and thought when i walked through that door that people were going to gasp, and whisper, and look at me in shame. That's not how it was at all. They are all there because they are also powerless, and their lives have also become unmanageable;) I was amazed at how many stories i could relate to. They were just like me.
After the meeting was over, about 10 people came and talked to me, and told me they were glad i came.Some of them hugged me. All kinds of phone numbers were offered to me, and i left there feeling warm and loved.
Good luck;)
I'm really glad you're thinking about going to a meeting. I think it is a very good idea. I don't go as often as i should but i'm going to start going ALOT more often now. But i have been to a few in the past. (probably 20) I'm sure there are people on here that can give you more advice than i can but i'll share what it was like for me the first time.
I went by myself, and I was scared to death just like you...it took everything i had to drive to that place and even more to get out of my van and walk up to the door. I managed to walk through the door, with shakey knees and sweaty hands
not knowing what to expect for sure.
As soon as i walked through that door, i felt comfortable. There, right in front of me, was a room full of people who had been, or were, exactly where i was. They make you feel so comfortable, and you don't have to talk at all, if you don't want to. No one is going to put you down, or make you feel like a failure. They will only give you love and support and share their experience, strength and hope.
I was soooo glad i didn't chicken out that night. I had myself all worked up and thought when i walked through that door that people were going to gasp, and whisper, and look at me in shame. That's not how it was at all. They are all there because they are also powerless, and their lives have also become unmanageable;) I was amazed at how many stories i could relate to. They were just like me.
After the meeting was over, about 10 people came and talked to me, and told me they were glad i came.Some of them hugged me. All kinds of phone numbers were offered to me, and i left there feeling warm and loved.
Good luck;)
Tremor,
Do what ever makes you feel most comfortable as long as you go!!!!!
Please do this though....when they ask if there are any newcomers...please raise your hand and tell them your name. It lets people know that you are new...they will take it from there.
If you are serious about changing your life one day at a time... when they hand out chips (if they do where you are) they will offer a chip to join AA ,it is a sign that you surrender and want to try the program one day at a time...please get up and get one.
Good luck .
C
Do what ever makes you feel most comfortable as long as you go!!!!!
Please do this though....when they ask if there are any newcomers...please raise your hand and tell them your name. It lets people know that you are new...they will take it from there.
If you are serious about changing your life one day at a time... when they hand out chips (if they do where you are) they will offer a chip to join AA ,it is a sign that you surrender and want to try the program one day at a time...please get up and get one.
Good luck .
C
Tremor
It IS hard to go to that first meeting - I still find it hard going to new meetings for the first time. I can totally relate to that sitting in the car and sweating for ages before walking over to the meeting place.
Often there are people outside smoking. I found that when I first walked up looking nervous and terrified and unsure no doubt, I didn't have to do ANYTHING. People walked up to me, asked me if it was my first meeting and started talking to me.
I got told things like "just listen" , "look for the similarities not the differences" I was offered meetings lists and the women there gave me their phone numbers to call if I needed.
I will say that I have been to meetings where I didn't feel as comfortable as others. If this happens PLEASE DON'T GIVE UP. Promise yourself that you'll try at least 2-3 different meetings in your area, and go to them each 2-3 times before deciding if its for you. Meetings vary.
In general AA people are very supportive and welcoming to newcomers. Its a shock to go to your first meeting and here people talking openly about very intimate personal things. The most unlikely looking people will say things that amaze you. Try to keep an open mind.
Meeting formats vary, mostly the meeting chair will read a passage from the "big book" sometimes they'll read the steps. Then someone will be invited to speak. When someone is speaking they do so without interruption for as long as they choose to speak. Everyone else just listens. Its not about dissecting what someone else is saying. Sometimes the chair may make a comment about something the person spoke about (in a general way related to drinking) sometimes not. Then someone else will be invited to speak etc.
At the end the serenity prayer is usually recited. Some meetings hold hands, others recite other prayers. There is some variation but the basic format holds. Most meetings last 90 mins.
I hope this gives you some idea of what to expect. Just remember, there is nothing to fear about going to a meeting.
It IS hard to go to that first meeting - I still find it hard going to new meetings for the first time. I can totally relate to that sitting in the car and sweating for ages before walking over to the meeting place.
Often there are people outside smoking. I found that when I first walked up looking nervous and terrified and unsure no doubt, I didn't have to do ANYTHING. People walked up to me, asked me if it was my first meeting and started talking to me.
I got told things like "just listen" , "look for the similarities not the differences" I was offered meetings lists and the women there gave me their phone numbers to call if I needed.
I will say that I have been to meetings where I didn't feel as comfortable as others. If this happens PLEASE DON'T GIVE UP. Promise yourself that you'll try at least 2-3 different meetings in your area, and go to them each 2-3 times before deciding if its for you. Meetings vary.
In general AA people are very supportive and welcoming to newcomers. Its a shock to go to your first meeting and here people talking openly about very intimate personal things. The most unlikely looking people will say things that amaze you. Try to keep an open mind.
Meeting formats vary, mostly the meeting chair will read a passage from the "big book" sometimes they'll read the steps. Then someone will be invited to speak. When someone is speaking they do so without interruption for as long as they choose to speak. Everyone else just listens. Its not about dissecting what someone else is saying. Sometimes the chair may make a comment about something the person spoke about (in a general way related to drinking) sometimes not. Then someone else will be invited to speak etc.
At the end the serenity prayer is usually recited. Some meetings hold hands, others recite other prayers. There is some variation but the basic format holds. Most meetings last 90 mins.
I hope this gives you some idea of what to expect. Just remember, there is nothing to fear about going to a meeting.
Tremor, How goes it? Did you get to a meeting? I think a Speaker meeting is a great idea, however, they are less personal where I go to meetings. I was asked when I expressed fear before going back to my first meeting (in 2003), "Were you afraid of going to the liquor store, bar or drug dealers by yourself...?" Well, no I thought, it totally made sense, however I did call the local AA Central Office spoke with someone who directed me to a meeting and gave me the Alano Club's phone number, the lady who answered at the Alano Club knew I filled with trepidation; even though her shift at the coffee bar ended at 12:00 noon, she waited for me to get there...and took me by the arm and led me into the meeting, showed me where to sit...and I will never forget her, her name is Kathy and we still talk to this day...what an angel...!
Let us know how you are doing...
Let us know how you are doing...
Tremor:
What an awesome post to read! I hope you went to the meeting and felt the warm embrace of Recovery. In my opinion, it's all about taking action and that's what you are doing. I can't think myself into right action but I can take action into right thinking. I'm really happy you are doing the footwork.
Rachel
What an awesome post to read! I hope you went to the meeting and felt the warm embrace of Recovery. In my opinion, it's all about taking action and that's what you are doing. I can't think myself into right action but I can take action into right thinking. I'm really happy you are doing the footwork.
Rachel
Hi Tremor;)
How are you doing today? I hope everything's alright. Check in when you can, k?
How are you doing today? I hope everything's alright. Check in when you can, k?
How you doin' today Tremor? You are in my thoughts and prayers!
Peace and Sobriety,
Valarie
Peace and Sobriety,
Valarie
Tremor
Hey Good Morning. I keep peeking over here to see if you are around......I am thinking about you and hope you made that meeting.....mainly, I hope you are okay...
Not feeling clever
Hey Good Morning. I keep peeking over here to see if you are around......I am thinking about you and hope you made that meeting.....mainly, I hope you are okay...
Not feeling clever
