Its been said here many times how super sensitive we are when we are early in our recovery and I believe that to be true. Newcomers come here and can easily be upset by direct things being said to them. I know I was one of them 2 years ago when I first came here.
But I also realize I'm still sensitive to things. I'm sensitive to being called names, by people attacking me personally. I liked what I think Tim said by I can't control how people take what I say to them. This is a cyber board where we can read something into what wasn't meant by the person typing.
BUT, when we are called names and attacked personally below the belt in an open forum its just wrong. Addict or no addict we are human and have feelings. Lets face it, as much as we can tell ourselves it doesn't matter what other people say or think, a direct hit or dig still hurts. New in reovery or with years clean, it hurts.
Not everyone is going to get along with everyone, fine. But please take it off board.
respectfully,
Redd
well said.
Thank you, Redd. Very well put.
Rachel
Rachel
Right On Redd!!!..It is even worse when certain people make stuff
up and e-mail it to others behind your back..
Doug
up and e-mail it to others behind your back..
Doug
doug,
you started in on that behavior last night. it was going fine and then wham out of nowhere from you. now you know i love you, and everyone's not gonna love everyone else... but some things are better left to be kept to yourself or in private. it's just childish...
edit to say ,. thanks redd...
you started in on that behavior last night. it was going fine and then wham out of nowhere from you. now you know i love you, and everyone's not gonna love everyone else... but some things are better left to be kept to yourself or in private. it's just childish...
edit to say ,. thanks redd...
With all due respect Doug, I don't think you get it. Or maybe you do.
What I'm trying to say here is this is an open forum for recovery. Making accusations should be kept in e-mail.
Getting clean has taught me to look at my own behavior. And it spilled over into other areas of my life besides recovery.
And now I have to look at myself and wonder by starting this thread did I stir the pot? It was not my intention, but I have to still learn from it.
Take a look at yourself Doug in all of this. No need to rerspond to me, just respond to yourself. And if you still feel the way you do, then again take it off board please to whoever your beef is with. Calling people names and hitting below the belt just isn't cool.
respectfully,
Redd
What I'm trying to say here is this is an open forum for recovery. Making accusations should be kept in e-mail.
Getting clean has taught me to look at my own behavior. And it spilled over into other areas of my life besides recovery.
And now I have to look at myself and wonder by starting this thread did I stir the pot? It was not my intention, but I have to still learn from it.
Take a look at yourself Doug in all of this. No need to rerspond to me, just respond to yourself. And if you still feel the way you do, then again take it off board please to whoever your beef is with. Calling people names and hitting below the belt just isn't cool.
respectfully,
Redd
Very well said Redd.
And no matter how far we are in our recovery, personal attacks hurt like hell. If you get off on that kind of stuff, I have to question just how far in recovery you truly are.
Leaving it off of this board would be a really good idea. I don't think things would escalate as far as they do. That and sharing personal emails. If there are any to begin with.
And no matter how far we are in our recovery, personal attacks hurt like hell. If you get off on that kind of stuff, I have to question just how far in recovery you truly are.
Leaving it off of this board would be a really good idea. I don't think things would escalate as far as they do. That and sharing personal emails. If there are any to begin with.
doug can't read the board, i believe he got banned....
Hi Redd,
In a perfect world....
Oh god we are so far from that here. But it could be a better place, that is for sure.
Take it to email, with best intentions, pour you heart out, try to work it out. Good idea, but it won't work and you know that as much as I do. Something happens with emails exchanged here at times, they move about, secrets shared where they shouldn't be, lives are torn open for what. One small thing taken the wrong way grows so fast, lines become set and then sides are drawn, with no real purpose. No one walks away with out feeling some pain. And I guess we all are apart of it at times, we make it worse, our ideals, what we see as right and wrong, where we push, and shove.
It is hard to sit back and watch it all. It is hard not to say something.
But the what is there to say, what is right to say and who decides....
How does this get fixed, how does it get fixed without letting those you may care about get stuck, trapped in thier own denial. That denial runs deep here, but then that would be what I see.
Maybe we all need to make sure our mirrors aren't cracked, or our eyes blinded by our own denial....
Maybe we all need to just walk away, let go...
You be good to you,
Love,
Tina
In a perfect world....
Oh god we are so far from that here. But it could be a better place, that is for sure.
Take it to email, with best intentions, pour you heart out, try to work it out. Good idea, but it won't work and you know that as much as I do. Something happens with emails exchanged here at times, they move about, secrets shared where they shouldn't be, lives are torn open for what. One small thing taken the wrong way grows so fast, lines become set and then sides are drawn, with no real purpose. No one walks away with out feeling some pain. And I guess we all are apart of it at times, we make it worse, our ideals, what we see as right and wrong, where we push, and shove.
It is hard to sit back and watch it all. It is hard not to say something.
But the what is there to say, what is right to say and who decides....
How does this get fixed, how does it get fixed without letting those you may care about get stuck, trapped in thier own denial. That denial runs deep here, but then that would be what I see.
Maybe we all need to make sure our mirrors aren't cracked, or our eyes blinded by our own denial....
Maybe we all need to just walk away, let go...
You be good to you,
Love,
Tina
Tina...
I enjoyed your post...thank you...
xoxo
Stacey
I enjoyed your post...thank you...
xoxo
Stacey
Hey Amy, Hope all is right in your world today. :-) Things here are high speed and I am trying my best to maintain and keep it under control. Talk to you soon.
Tina,....great post........
Something happens with emails exchanged here at times, they move about, secrets shared where they shouldn't be , lives are torn open
Oh, so very, very true. It's very sad and I hope this latest battle doesn;t soon turn into a full blown war when the truth is revealed and those who have been betrayed suffer a broken heart. There is no worst feeling than discovering the one's you thought you could trust share all of your deep, personal secrets with their other buddies.
Just walk away! Great idea, think I'll do that right now, and I will see you tomorow, my friend!
Love, Carol
Being accused of something that others do themselves, is hard to swallow.
Tina,
You make so much sense.
Carol,
I'm still shopping....someone get me an intervention here.
Redd
Redd,
It was so great to talk to you and catch up...sure wish we lived closer...we could help eachother with "the shopping" thing. lol
Love you girl
Lisa
It was so great to talk to you and catch up...sure wish we lived closer...we could help eachother with "the shopping" thing. lol
Love you girl
Lisa
Redd great post. People do get hurt and this place becomes nothing more than a playgroud at times.
I think Tina said it best denial runs deep; and the mirrors are cracked.
Peace out.
I think Tina said it best denial runs deep; and the mirrors are cracked.
Peace out.
hello everyone...............
i hope you all have a beautiful hoilday season this year...........
becareful driving and everything...........
Tina..................very good post.............
thank you
thumper
i hope you all have a beautiful hoilday season this year...........
becareful driving and everything...........
Tina..................very good post.............
thank you
thumper
I will once again say this as I have for 2 years...
Do we all need to agree?Of course not
Do we all need to like each other?
no
Should we trust what people say at face value....NO
BUT the thing that ALWAYS ALWAYS MUST BE IS RESPECT FOR EACH OTHER & THE MEMBERS OF THIS BOARD.Name calling & such on here is not helpful to anyoneName calling off here isnt nice either but at least its on a personal level as Ive found out.
RESPECT WITHOUT THAT....WE HAVE NOTHING
molly
Do we all need to agree?Of course not
Do we all need to like each other?
no
Should we trust what people say at face value....NO
BUT the thing that ALWAYS ALWAYS MUST BE IS RESPECT FOR EACH OTHER & THE MEMBERS OF THIS BOARD.Name calling & such on here is not helpful to anyoneName calling off here isnt nice either but at least its on a personal level as Ive found out.
RESPECT WITHOUT THAT....WE HAVE NOTHING
molly
Excellent post, Redd. I do not think you have stirred the pot. This seemed more like a gentle reminder of how it feels to be on the receiving end of insults, accusations, namecalling.
I don't communicate much "off the board" and I have no idea what has happened through emails or phone calls that has some people upset. But, so much drama has spilled onto the board that I don't think it even matters that people have taken things off the board. The tension between some is so high. Even if people aren't directly airing their (or someone else's) dirty laundry here, trust me, people can still smell it.
For anyone who has found themselves in the midst of these conflicts, it might be best to stay off the board until it blows over. It doesn't matter if you're guilty, innocent or just stuck in the middle. It's impossible to leave emotions behind when you come here to post. Out of respect for this forum and it's purpose, if you're involved, consider logging out and taking a breath for a couple of days.
I don't communicate much "off the board" and I have no idea what has happened through emails or phone calls that has some people upset. But, so much drama has spilled onto the board that I don't think it even matters that people have taken things off the board. The tension between some is so high. Even if people aren't directly airing their (or someone else's) dirty laundry here, trust me, people can still smell it.
For anyone who has found themselves in the midst of these conflicts, it might be best to stay off the board until it blows over. It doesn't matter if you're guilty, innocent or just stuck in the middle. It's impossible to leave emotions behind when you come here to post. Out of respect for this forum and it's purpose, if you're involved, consider logging out and taking a breath for a couple of days.
Hey Everyone,
Great post, good to see everybody here. Amy,Lisa, Carol, Sabrina, Kerry, Stacey, None and Rachel.
Hope you're all doing well. I'm hanging in here, I'm going through some stuff with my relatives and soon to be ex, but I'm handling it ok. I called United Way and they hooked me up with a list of doctors in my area that have a sliding fee so I can get my own prescriptions for anti depressants, they also gave me numbers to call where I can possibly qualify for health insurance. I'll start making these calls soon, Need to eat first and get rid of this headache..
This place is great, I don't know if this number is for everywhere, it's 211, if anybody needs help they are opened 24-7, try calling them, they are very nice and extremely helpful.
Hope you're all doing well. Have a great day.
Love,
Liz
Great post, good to see everybody here. Amy,Lisa, Carol, Sabrina, Kerry, Stacey, None and Rachel.
Hope you're all doing well. I'm hanging in here, I'm going through some stuff with my relatives and soon to be ex, but I'm handling it ok. I called United Way and they hooked me up with a list of doctors in my area that have a sliding fee so I can get my own prescriptions for anti depressants, they also gave me numbers to call where I can possibly qualify for health insurance. I'll start making these calls soon, Need to eat first and get rid of this headache..
This place is great, I don't know if this number is for everywhere, it's 211, if anybody needs help they are opened 24-7, try calling them, they are very nice and extremely helpful.
Hope you're all doing well. Have a great day.
Love,
Liz
Excellent post Atlas.
It's really good to see you Liz and to know that you are getting some much deserved help. I'm sorry that you are going through all of that crap with family and husband. How is school going? How are your kids?
Take care honey...
Lisa
It's really good to see you Liz and to know that you are getting some much deserved help. I'm sorry that you are going through all of that crap with family and husband. How is school going? How are your kids?
Take care honey...
Lisa
