I don't even know where to start. I'm a 37 years old with wife and kids. I started smoking a lot back in my high school years. I was a what was called a chronic . Every few hours, every day. This went on for years. When I met my now wife, she had similar interests. We moved out , when we were 19&20. Still smoking everyday. Then we both at the same time just quit smoking. We smoked a laced joint and scared the hell out of us so we were ok on stopping. Our lives went on great. We were happy, I honestly don't remember any withdrawals at all. We evenly started having kids. Pretty young, 21 &22. We even started smoking a joint maybe once a month when the grandparents would give us a break for date night. This lasted about a year and then my wife decided to quit and didn't want me smoking either anymore. I can respect that. We are parents now. Here's the problem, I didn't completely stop. I stopped for maybe 5 years then but every once in a blue moon, if someone offered it up, I'd take a few tokes. That wa maybe 3-5 times a year. Now...for the past 5 years, I have pretty much a everyday smoker again. I only smoke 1 bowl or equal to half a joint every day. I have hid this well from my family. Sometimes I my red eyes with either shampoo in the eyes or allergies. I am now, what believe is hitting rock bottom. For the last 5 years while smoking weed, my marriage is falling apart, I have terrible mood swings, my doctor has me on welbutrin cause I hurt so bad. I know I'm destroying life and family but weed is the only thing that makes me feel better. Problem is, I am aware that weed is also causing my depression and marriage issues. So, I'm stuck. I want to quit smoking, I want to fix my life up but I'm afraid of the after effects. Not so much the withdrawals, it's my mental state. I work shift work at the town hospital as a support worker, my wife is laid off and we have mortgage and 3 kids so checking into rehab is not an option. If I confront my wife, I am 120% positive that my marriage will be over which is what I''m trying to save. Is life a lot "brighter" and better after I stop? And of so, how should I go about stopping without taking a pause in my daily work/home life. Please help...
Phil
I am 46, and very familiar with the things you have written. I am an off and on smoker myself. I dont see a problem until it becomes daily use ....and a crutch that is used to cope with life's problems. But ANY use for some people can lead to full blown addiction again , so you really need to understand yourself to figure this out for yourself.
My wife was against smoking pot from the get go - so I hid it. But when I smoked the most I was still sober MOST of the time , so I was able to get away with it. Marriage and kids come first...but this is a two edged sword. I wont justify smoking if it really is a corruptive influence....but I also wont justify leaving someone because they come home smelling like pot. This is where it gets dicey and the advice gets polarized depending on what group you talk to.
I took offense to being told I couldnt get high with friends because it was such a small thing I wanted to do. My wife currently accepts that I do this occassionally , but she wont put up with it all the time. We both had to compromise our positions - which is what marriage is all about.
Would type more - but gotta work
keep writing
I am 46, and very familiar with the things you have written. I am an off and on smoker myself. I dont see a problem until it becomes daily use ....and a crutch that is used to cope with life's problems. But ANY use for some people can lead to full blown addiction again , so you really need to understand yourself to figure this out for yourself.
My wife was against smoking pot from the get go - so I hid it. But when I smoked the most I was still sober MOST of the time , so I was able to get away with it. Marriage and kids come first...but this is a two edged sword. I wont justify smoking if it really is a corruptive influence....but I also wont justify leaving someone because they come home smelling like pot. This is where it gets dicey and the advice gets polarized depending on what group you talk to.
I took offense to being told I couldnt get high with friends because it was such a small thing I wanted to do. My wife currently accepts that I do this occassionally , but she wont put up with it all the time. We both had to compromise our positions - which is what marriage is all about.
Would type more - but gotta work
keep writing
