Dear Angie
You haven't posted for a time.....yeah i know what more advice can you give me regarding the satanic bf that everybody hasn't given me already..
But i am posting this to make sure you are okay.....i remember one time you wrote about getting tired of people sometimes and as i said i know the feeling and just want to withdraw sometimes....i want to run off somewhere i have never been....but unfortunately i got to take myself with me and that is who i am really running away from...and as i choose to stay sober i can't escape that way..and obviously i am still breathing so i haven't chose THAT way out.....yet
Maybe i will start drawing again....as i was an Art Major and even sold some of my stuff...
Maybe you are just on holiday....but anyhoo just wanted you to know i have been thinking of you....your friend MARY
Hi Mary
Sorry I disappeared. I haven't been able to access my computer this week cos I had a new program installed here at work and was kinda hard to go on the net with a whole buncha people standing around you!! Ha, ha!!!
I hope you are well, I had the most uneventful weekend. I did absolutely nothing.
I suppose some would say that it was a good thing to have some time to myself, but I don't like that cos then I think too much...
I have to run Mary, but please let me know how you doing kay.
Love ya lots, Ang
Sorry I disappeared. I haven't been able to access my computer this week cos I had a new program installed here at work and was kinda hard to go on the net with a whole buncha people standing around you!! Ha, ha!!!
I hope you are well, I had the most uneventful weekend. I did absolutely nothing.
I suppose some would say that it was a good thing to have some time to myself, but I don't like that cos then I think too much...
I have to run Mary, but please let me know how you doing kay.
Love ya lots, Ang
Hey Angie
Glad you are okay....i know what you mean about having TOO much time alone with your thoughts....especially the negative ones and that's why i bounce some of those dark thoughts off of kind people such as yourself and others on the Recovery Boards...but i have been making a point of replying to other posts as it feels good to help others and i know how good it feels as well when someone takes the time to reply to some of mine...
Well the bf or the prince of darkness emerge into the light again after an almost 5 week silent treatment but i was beset by all these no message left calls on the answering machine round the clock and i figured it might be him as he knows i wouldn't pick up if i heard his voice...
This past Monday he called from work announcing that he was moving( which is kinda all of a sudden) and that he wanted me to have the address so if i was in any kind of trouble i could always write to him...but i didn't hear him inviting me over or go into detail about the place itself....which means he is hiding something....well i thought that was that and of course he could stick the address up his you know what....i ain't going to write
This past Thursday evening he leaves another message...stating that Saturday would be his last day at his old place (what does that matter as i haven't been there for weeks on his threatening me not to)....and once again giving me his new address and then he started getting angry as i wasn't picking up the phone and that i was probably with my "new man" but still he is telling me that if the dude gets rough just let him know and he will deal with him...
Angie as you know there is no "new man" of which he accused me of being with weeks ago....just to get rid of me so he could get high or be with some other woman....and besides if you thought that your mate of 4 yrs was cheating on you would you go out of your way to have her write to you and promise that you would always be there for her ??? NO !!!!
I think he just did that as he probably wanted something from me in connection with his moving....furniture money....and he was being Mr. Nice Guy until he got it and then it would be so long to me....but why wouldn't his new babe if there is one be paying his way ? All of a sudden those phone calls have stopped and i am not going to write to him either and let's see if he tries to call again.....i know he doesn't give a fig about me but maybe even a monster like him doesn't completely want to lose contact with someone he has known for over 4 years as all of his family including his daughter have turned their backs on him......i think he puts on this brave who needs anybody act but deep down inside he must feel like an old failure at 51 sweeping up at the factory for temp wage and with 5 felonies and a heroin habit who is going to hire him ?? What nice woman would want to be with him....and besides he can't pay his own way and i must stay strong and not contact him...
luv your friend MARY
Glad you are okay....i know what you mean about having TOO much time alone with your thoughts....especially the negative ones and that's why i bounce some of those dark thoughts off of kind people such as yourself and others on the Recovery Boards...but i have been making a point of replying to other posts as it feels good to help others and i know how good it feels as well when someone takes the time to reply to some of mine...
Well the bf or the prince of darkness emerge into the light again after an almost 5 week silent treatment but i was beset by all these no message left calls on the answering machine round the clock and i figured it might be him as he knows i wouldn't pick up if i heard his voice...
This past Monday he called from work announcing that he was moving( which is kinda all of a sudden) and that he wanted me to have the address so if i was in any kind of trouble i could always write to him...but i didn't hear him inviting me over or go into detail about the place itself....which means he is hiding something....well i thought that was that and of course he could stick the address up his you know what....i ain't going to write
This past Thursday evening he leaves another message...stating that Saturday would be his last day at his old place (what does that matter as i haven't been there for weeks on his threatening me not to)....and once again giving me his new address and then he started getting angry as i wasn't picking up the phone and that i was probably with my "new man" but still he is telling me that if the dude gets rough just let him know and he will deal with him...
Angie as you know there is no "new man" of which he accused me of being with weeks ago....just to get rid of me so he could get high or be with some other woman....and besides if you thought that your mate of 4 yrs was cheating on you would you go out of your way to have her write to you and promise that you would always be there for her ??? NO !!!!
I think he just did that as he probably wanted something from me in connection with his moving....furniture money....and he was being Mr. Nice Guy until he got it and then it would be so long to me....but why wouldn't his new babe if there is one be paying his way ? All of a sudden those phone calls have stopped and i am not going to write to him either and let's see if he tries to call again.....i know he doesn't give a fig about me but maybe even a monster like him doesn't completely want to lose contact with someone he has known for over 4 years as all of his family including his daughter have turned their backs on him......i think he puts on this brave who needs anybody act but deep down inside he must feel like an old failure at 51 sweeping up at the factory for temp wage and with 5 felonies and a heroin habit who is going to hire him ?? What nice woman would want to be with him....and besides he can't pay his own way and i must stay strong and not contact him...
luv your friend MARY
