i went to the pain pill board...asked if someone could offer some help for Arenal...asked about the pills the Doc gave me...and am feeling hurt and angry at the replies I got.... Im just venting, I know that...but...hell..this kind of stuff makes me not want to come here anymore. ...i was only trying to help...and ya know something ? makes me not want to ....makes me angry...makes me want to cry.....whatever...just my rant for today...felt safe here for awhile but maybe im just feeling too sensitive and in the middle of everythng...but i dont feel safe anymore here...i feel attacked...and made to feel stupid...i dont need that...not now...not ever
hi Con.. I totally agree with your view.. I wasn't trying to score I was looking for help through this when the so called professionals weren't willing to help me.. I'm angry too, I feel like these people are labelling me... I did not mean to put Davey in this situation and now feel like I should just quit this as all I seem to be doing is causing grief for some people... what the hell else am I meant to do if the professionals won't help me.. I think it's easy for that person on the pain pill forum to say that my financial situation will get better if I just don't buy drugs... if it was that easy there would be no need for this forum... thanks for your understanding on this...
I was really, really down on Friday - never been so down if I'm truthful.. when Cian went out to work I really considered doing something stupid only didn't have the guts to do it thankfully.. if it wasn't for you, Davey, Eckie, Linz and Amity I don't think I would have got through it... they're a self rightous bunch of people over on the pain pill board if you ask me.. I've probably started something here that will get me banned but that's how I feel...
don't let my situation get to you... you're doing great and I really wish you all the best... you deserve it.. well done...
I was really, really down on Friday - never been so down if I'm truthful.. when Cian went out to work I really considered doing something stupid only didn't have the guts to do it thankfully.. if it wasn't for you, Davey, Eckie, Linz and Amity I don't think I would have got through it... they're a self rightous bunch of people over on the pain pill board if you ask me.. I've probably started something here that will get me banned but that's how I feel...
don't let my situation get to you... you're doing great and I really wish you all the best... you deserve it.. well done...
take a tablet girls,,,f*** them;;;;eckie
Constantine ~
I have found your posts to be open-hearted, intelligent, and most kind. You put yourself out there to ask for assistance for someone who touched you, someone I imagine you felt you could relate to. I have followed your story and was so glad to know you were meeting with success in your struggle to conquer your addiction, and was happy for you when you reconnected with your family. I think you have been a real plus to this board and I hope you'll stick around. Now I'm going to go ahead and post what I have written several times in the past few days but erased and I'm sure there'll be some fallout, but whatever.
Arenal's posts from the outset have sounded somehow off to me, too many reasons not to get clean...nothing ever seeming to work out...some things allegedly done by doctors that just sound shaky...makes me question desire. This post was most disturbing:
No, I've never been a heroin addict, just cocaine for me, and I know it's different with opiates. I also understand that it can be tricky navigating the care system that is part of heroin recovery (a very good friend of mine runs a clinic and has for years, so I've heard much about the frustration felt by both addicts and those who try to assist them.) But I've heard folks here - folks for whom I have tremendous respect - who have gone to great lengths to get their methadone - working a job, taking care of children, barely making their bills and still making nearly-impossible clinic visits because they wanted it that badly. I know not everyone gets to the same place in the same time or in the same way, but I do know that when enough is enough they get it done and don't expect anyone to sign off on their stuff.
Recently Arenal has resorted to ugly name-calling and swearing - very angry stuff. The Pain Pill board is very supportive of one another in my experience, but they will call'em like they see'em - like it or not. When that is met with name-calling it doesn't diminish them one bit, but it does diminish the other.
I most sincerely hope that Arenal gets the help s/he needs and that you Con, will continue to be a part of the community here.
Respecfully ~ MomNMore
I have found your posts to be open-hearted, intelligent, and most kind. You put yourself out there to ask for assistance for someone who touched you, someone I imagine you felt you could relate to. I have followed your story and was so glad to know you were meeting with success in your struggle to conquer your addiction, and was happy for you when you reconnected with your family. I think you have been a real plus to this board and I hope you'll stick around. Now I'm going to go ahead and post what I have written several times in the past few days but erased and I'm sure there'll be some fallout, but whatever.
Arenal's posts from the outset have sounded somehow off to me, too many reasons not to get clean...nothing ever seeming to work out...some things allegedly done by doctors that just sound shaky...makes me question desire. This post was most disturbing:
| QUOTE |
| ...they'll give the usual 'how much do you want to get clean crap', they'd expect me to give up my job and devote myself to attending a chemist for I don't know how long... |
No, I've never been a heroin addict, just cocaine for me, and I know it's different with opiates. I also understand that it can be tricky navigating the care system that is part of heroin recovery (a very good friend of mine runs a clinic and has for years, so I've heard much about the frustration felt by both addicts and those who try to assist them.) But I've heard folks here - folks for whom I have tremendous respect - who have gone to great lengths to get their methadone - working a job, taking care of children, barely making their bills and still making nearly-impossible clinic visits because they wanted it that badly. I know not everyone gets to the same place in the same time or in the same way, but I do know that when enough is enough they get it done and don't expect anyone to sign off on their stuff.
Recently Arenal has resorted to ugly name-calling and swearing - very angry stuff. The Pain Pill board is very supportive of one another in my experience, but they will call'em like they see'em - like it or not. When that is met with name-calling it doesn't diminish them one bit, but it does diminish the other.
I most sincerely hope that Arenal gets the help s/he needs and that you Con, will continue to be a part of the community here.
Respecfully ~ MomNMore
dont worry about it Constantine.. let it go and move on.
Hey Con,
It's not your problem. I'm really new ot this and not well-placed to give anyone advice, but I'm trying to learn and I'm slowly realising that other people have all sorts of stuff they throw at me that is NOTHING to do with me and everything to do with them.
And some stuff people say is to do with me.
Thanks to the unconditional compassion and understanding you and others offered me I am slowly becoming able to accept that not everyone is gong to love me and that's ok. Some people care enough to put up with my flaws and mistakes and some people are enough. Not everyone has to.
Look con, you're loved! Strangers love you. Isn't that brilliant! Come back Con, we love you.
Martin
It's not your problem. I'm really new ot this and not well-placed to give anyone advice, but I'm trying to learn and I'm slowly realising that other people have all sorts of stuff they throw at me that is NOTHING to do with me and everything to do with them.
And some stuff people say is to do with me.
Thanks to the unconditional compassion and understanding you and others offered me I am slowly becoming able to accept that not everyone is gong to love me and that's ok. Some people care enough to put up with my flaws and mistakes and some people are enough. Not everyone has to.
Look con, you're loved! Strangers love you. Isn't that brilliant! Come back Con, we love you.
Martin
Con and Arenal. Listen folks, I've seen this happen on here before (haven't we Bryn). Not everyone will agree with what's written here, I've certainly gone over to other boards for a nosey before an been infuriated by waht I've read but you have to try not to bite, these people thrive on it. Be the better person!
No-one has a clue what heroin addiction is like unless they have experienced it themselves. One day you hate it, it's taken everything from you. That's it you say, I'm never doing it again (and we mean that at the time), then the next day, we love it again. That's the way Heroin gets you. It's a love/hate thing. I agreed with Arenal about not wanting to give up my job etc. for a program as I know, if I don't have my job, I have nothing. It's what's kept me from losing everything over the past 5 years.
Please can we all have a group hug???
Don't stop coming here Con/Arenal, just ignore this sort of thing.
Linz xx
No-one has a clue what heroin addiction is like unless they have experienced it themselves. One day you hate it, it's taken everything from you. That's it you say, I'm never doing it again (and we mean that at the time), then the next day, we love it again. That's the way Heroin gets you. It's a love/hate thing. I agreed with Arenal about not wanting to give up my job etc. for a program as I know, if I don't have my job, I have nothing. It's what's kept me from losing everything over the past 5 years.
Please can we all have a group hug???
Don't stop coming here Con/Arenal, just ignore this sort of thing.
Linz xx
Alrite all....what Linz just said was spot on.....take care friends...........Davey
Honey don't you be going nowhere............oversensitive?
Psssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You give us strength and hope...............and kindness ain't no weakness.
Who was mean to ya? I'll beat them up.............I jest.........you alright, sweetie?
Don't let nobody get ya down............you've come too far.
Psssshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You give us strength and hope...............and kindness ain't no weakness.
Who was mean to ya? I'll beat them up.............I jest.........you alright, sweetie?
Don't let nobody get ya down............you've come too far.
Bryn....:)
oh con con and miss Arrie--dont you be poofing off and cutting us all off from youre love over a situation where everyone seems to have gotten ruffled over an issue all opiate adicts have dealt with--withdrawal--i havent read anything over there-this was my first post i read today, but i can see theres been some teeth bared and some hurt feelings--all i can say is when i come here or go to meetings i really try hard to just take what i need and leave the rest---and STCK WITH THE WINNERS!! if you feel most comfy over here on this bored (i personally do) then so be it...we will love you--as well as many on the other boards....whne in recovery we all haveour ideas of whats the best way to get clean and what others should or shouldnt do, and when your new in any avenue it can be a scary thing to try to fit in--hence the reason i am shy and leary of people.anyway--let it go and just know we are rooting for you--and hey if the mederators are letting you know its all good--your fine!!!
how can you tell if a a reply is erased--after i asked what was going on in that other post i put on another post immediately with some good stuff--i dont hink i said anything too bad but i dont see it now--it was erased or i didnt send it how can i find out??
it was erased,alot of what was said was erased probably for the good of all the sites.i now think it was probably better erased and let people move on and try and help each other the best we can;;;eckie
Dont think ya can ...find out ....Amity.....as Eck .said its a wee storm that raged but has now calmed....thank goodness........Davey
I am OVER it !! Today is another day...and I think...uh...I'll just stay my butt over on this board for now :) Arrie...sorry I caused a pack of trouble...and Thanks for everyone talking to us ...hugs all around...I'd be SOOOOO lost without you all !!!
hey Con.. great to hear from you and you sound positive... don't know what you're apologising for coz you've no reason to, if anybody should say sorry it should be me.. I've read all the posts and taken all the good thoughts and wishes from them on board.. as you say today is another day... I've been given the name of a doctor who might help me so fingers crossed I can get to see him this week.. have to call him tomorrow to see what time his surgery hours are - coz he's a private gp he might have an evening surgery, here's hoping.. things are looking good for Cian - he's starting on his script on Friday morning so hopefully things are beginning to be on the up..
like you said I'm gonna stick with the H Board from now on - not too sure about the PP Board, can't figure out how to take some of them,.. I'll probably get slated for saying that but who cares... Davey said some very real stuff - some really great people on this board..
thought today would never end, one of those days in work when a minute seems like an hour.. you know the ones I'm sure...
just wanted to mention too that you're very much respected here, good on ya..
hope all else are good, Eck, Amity, Linz, Bryn etc..
Arrie...
like you said I'm gonna stick with the H Board from now on - not too sure about the PP Board, can't figure out how to take some of them,.. I'll probably get slated for saying that but who cares... Davey said some very real stuff - some really great people on this board..
thought today would never end, one of those days in work when a minute seems like an hour.. you know the ones I'm sure...
just wanted to mention too that you're very much respected here, good on ya..
hope all else are good, Eck, Amity, Linz, Bryn etc..
Arrie...
Hey Arrie, hows it going ? Did you make any headway on things ? Hope its getting a bit better for you. Will pop back on tommorow morning. Hope all is well. Stay Sane
Con
Con
What's disturbing to me is that you think Herion is worse than pain pills or any other drug. A drug is a drug is a drug, no matter what it is. Just as an addict is an addict. We are all the same. I don't go into NA meetings and think that I'm better just because my addiction was pills given to me by a doctor. I am no better than the person living on the street shooting herion or meth. When we put ourselves apart from others, we begin to think that the rules don't apply to us. We think our excuses have merit.
cowgirl u could turn that 360 and say what is disturbing to us is that u think pain pills is worse than heroin,im not trying to start another argument or debate,but i think its best left at that,,,eckie
