Assuming I Have To Find A New Sponser

Hi! I have been trying to go to more meetigs lately. Not much. However I did find a sponser a couple weeks ago. She is really cool and was giving me good advice. We were talking alot.
This morning I met her for coffee at Starbucks. As we were sitting outside her purse was hanging on her chair. Long story short it fell off and her stuff spilled out. I was helping her pick some of it up and I noticed a pill bottle rolling down toward the curb. As I grabbed it I read real fast what it was. Yeah I am nosy sometimes. Anyway it was percocet. I was thinking ok is this a big deal or what? I handed it to her and she had said Thanks those are my husbands. He would be so pissed if I lost those. That is not true cuz it said her name on it!
I just still visited with her for awhile but felt let down. What is the odds of that?
I just am dissapointed and will have to find a new one I guess.
I probably will ask her about that but I really do not see the point.
It is crazy how that happened. Like I was meant to find out.
That just tripped me out. It seems like everybody I have been meeting lately is using pain pills! I am just frustrated and totally let down.
My first sponosr was on oxys and t-3s. I was coming off fioricet and xanax. It worked for me for 3 months but during that 3 months I was looking for another sponsor. She was taking me thru the steps in that 3 months not just chatting. If this chick isn't taking you thru the steps already, I would find a new one. It's possible she is taking them as prescribed but you have no way of knowing either way until she shows up spaced out. If you aren't comfortable with her on pain pills find a new sponsor and don't be afraid to ask if she is on any medication up front. I ask new sponsees that and won't sponsor anyone taking benzos or opiates. That's just my choice. Others are ok with it but I refuse to sponsor someone taking my DOC. Good luck with your search.
Bianca - You are being tested all over the place. That is really weird. What are you going to do?
Bianca....Not a good sign! Even if she were taking them as prescribed,why the need to lie about them not being her's?

I would run.

God's hand is in this.
The 2 woman I had considered for sponsers both had bottles of pills lying around and it totally freaked me out. I could not deal with it at all. For me I could not hang with folks that are using like that, regardless of whether it was abused or not, too much of a distraction for me and I could not understand at that time why they were not more sensitive to the addicts around them especially having meetings and dinners in the home. I mean seriously bottles lying around not hidden at all. In my opinion it is best to find another sponser and the part where she said they were her husband's and her name was on the bottle is a huge red flag.

keep going to meetings and you will find the right sponser

Carol
Hey Bianca,

You might be surprized to find how many people in the program are still using. Don't let that get you down. You just have to find another sponsor. Perhaps now you can ask the right questions to next women. It's your right, just as it would be hers to ask you.

Honesty is the key to working the program right. Many walk the walk...not all tow the line.

You are doing a great job, just keep on keeping on. It's odd sometimes how things work out but it's for the best. Everything happens for a reason.

Man I hate that saying...but it's so true!
Carol=
QUOTE
For me I could not hang with folks that are using like that, regardless of whether it was abused or not, too much of a distraction for me and I could not understand at that time why they were not more sensitive to the addicts around them especially having meetings and dinners in the home


AMEN to that.

Bianca......Last week I was working at this clients house and she called me in to her bedroom.She said she wasn't able to get up.I go in there and she looks like road kill.I thought maybe her husband had beat her up.She had black eyes,puffy lips,stitches,bruises.......you get the picture.She tells me she had her face done.There were little orange bottles everywhere.She proceeds to inform me in that goofy,spaced out opiate haze that she feels no pain and is set up for weeks with some good drugs.

Man...........I was f***ing uncomfortable.My knee jerk reaction was to ask"What did they give you girl"?I didn't.I just made a beeline for the front door and said hope you feel better soon.

I use to seek out situations like that and they would always present themselves.I have changed but those situations are still there.I'm sensitive to them because I'm an addict.I don't look at it like God is testing me either.People take drugs and a lot of them do it responsibily and then stop.
We have to be on alert and never let our guard down.My ex sponsor use to always tell me"If you keep running across a busy street,eventually you will get hit"

Have a good one
I wanted to add that in the early days I thought sponsers were God and that they had all the answers, what I did learn is most of the people I spoke with had more clean time and a good understanding of how the program worked. I did do what my sponser suggested and it helped me very much. For me I really had to understand a sponser is just us with more time spent away from their drug of choice. I had very high expections of what a sponser should be and I was blasted everytime. I would go to meetings and watch the people that I thought I wanted as a sponser, I was taught same sex sponser, less problem. Basically if you hear someone talking and walking the way you want to go, ask them and see what happens. A sponser is there to guide thru the program not lead and sometimes if we don't work our own program, if they fall we can fall too.

Take care

Carol