Can anyone tell me what to expect from my grandson who was born to a heroin addict
nanny
nanny,
Hello and welcome. I'm sorry under such circumstances.
Is the baby brand new? Was your daughter using up to the birth? Have you spoken to the hospital staff as far as how they are treating both of them?
I'm not an expert, but know women who were using when they delivered. If they had any prenantal care they usually were given methadone. Also, the few girls I do know who delivered said actually they were treated well in the hospital.
Now as far as how they treat the baby doll that's another story. I mean as far as medication and all. Someone else could tell you better. The baby does suffer withdrawl. Absolutely and anyone I know told me they didn't flat out lied. As adults we know that horrific withdrawl.
As far as up the road developmentally it's been seen that babies beorn to heroin addicted mothers most never suffer developmentally. They also don't have problems physically. They are however at a huge risk of up the road becoming addicted to chemicals. So says the experts anyway.
My friend is a foster parent and she had a baby born to a heroin addicted mom. She cried alot of course. never slept. Only thing seemed to soothe her was warm baths. It was a good maybe eight days where the going was rough.
That baby is two years old now. perfect in every way. Smart as a whip. Funny and on track in every way. Her mom too has recovered and they are doing great.
Wishing you well, and I'd say if you could go over to the part of the board that's for loved ones, families of addicts. They have been in your place. They are a great comfort. Sorry if all I wrote don't help. I'm a recovering heroin addict.
Got your daughter in my prayers as well.
Hello and welcome. I'm sorry under such circumstances.
Is the baby brand new? Was your daughter using up to the birth? Have you spoken to the hospital staff as far as how they are treating both of them?
I'm not an expert, but know women who were using when they delivered. If they had any prenantal care they usually were given methadone. Also, the few girls I do know who delivered said actually they were treated well in the hospital.
Now as far as how they treat the baby doll that's another story. I mean as far as medication and all. Someone else could tell you better. The baby does suffer withdrawl. Absolutely and anyone I know told me they didn't flat out lied. As adults we know that horrific withdrawl.
As far as up the road developmentally it's been seen that babies beorn to heroin addicted mothers most never suffer developmentally. They also don't have problems physically. They are however at a huge risk of up the road becoming addicted to chemicals. So says the experts anyway.
My friend is a foster parent and she had a baby born to a heroin addicted mom. She cried alot of course. never slept. Only thing seemed to soothe her was warm baths. It was a good maybe eight days where the going was rough.
That baby is two years old now. perfect in every way. Smart as a whip. Funny and on track in every way. Her mom too has recovered and they are doing great.
Wishing you well, and I'd say if you could go over to the part of the board that's for loved ones, families of addicts. They have been in your place. They are a great comfort. Sorry if all I wrote don't help. I'm a recovering heroin addict.
Got your daughter in my prayers as well.
sorry 2 butt in on conversation , just like 2 add my 2 pence..a friend of mine had a baby girl whilst she was using methadone..she used heroin every now'n'again ans they took the baby off her for a while 2 detox the baby.. can't remember how long it took but she must b about 7-8 yrs old now and is totally healthy ( as far as i know ) ...........................as 4 hot baths , everytime i've clucked iwould get into a hot bath and it would b really soothing and took all aches and pains away for 20-30 min. i'd get otu and then a.s.a.p. run another bath and do same again.. it really helps..
Hi Nanny & crew
I was also about to ask a question along those lines. I have a friend who I lived with for a short while a couple of years ago,I wanted to give giving up one final try but she wasn't really ready so we split up but remained friends. She met and started going out with a taxi driver, they are very happy and he knows about her habit.
Two weeks ago she was at my door in tears and over a cup of tea she tells me how on a routine check up at the doctors she finds out she is expecting. I was quite shocked at how she could go that long without knowing, she hasn't had a period for two years and she is a very petite woman so the doctor said she was five months into the pregnancy. She is on methadone at the moment 85mls but her keyworker will not reduce her at this late stage of pregnancy, she is using on top I try to tell her to be careful as I'm a man and never will know what being pregnant is like, I'm trying to help but not sure how to I've told her any time day or night she can off load to me I'm happy to listen, her guy is very supportive but because he has never been addicted to heroin I think she wants to talk with some one who has but like I've said I don't know what to say.
I'm trying to get her on the net so she can contact this site as I've told her about all the help and kind words I've has from many people here. I don't think it would be constructive to say how silly she was as the deed is done and nothing will change that, I konw if she had found out in time she would have terminated it. If I try to put myself in her position, 36 yrs old with 2 kids (18yrs & 11yrs) I would be in an nuthouse for sure.
If anyone out there has a few pointers for me on what or how to help her I would be most grateful.
Peter
I was also about to ask a question along those lines. I have a friend who I lived with for a short while a couple of years ago,I wanted to give giving up one final try but she wasn't really ready so we split up but remained friends. She met and started going out with a taxi driver, they are very happy and he knows about her habit.
Two weeks ago she was at my door in tears and over a cup of tea she tells me how on a routine check up at the doctors she finds out she is expecting. I was quite shocked at how she could go that long without knowing, she hasn't had a period for two years and she is a very petite woman so the doctor said she was five months into the pregnancy. She is on methadone at the moment 85mls but her keyworker will not reduce her at this late stage of pregnancy, she is using on top I try to tell her to be careful as I'm a man and never will know what being pregnant is like, I'm trying to help but not sure how to I've told her any time day or night she can off load to me I'm happy to listen, her guy is very supportive but because he has never been addicted to heroin I think she wants to talk with some one who has but like I've said I don't know what to say.
I'm trying to get her on the net so she can contact this site as I've told her about all the help and kind words I've has from many people here. I don't think it would be constructive to say how silly she was as the deed is done and nothing will change that, I konw if she had found out in time she would have terminated it. If I try to put myself in her position, 36 yrs old with 2 kids (18yrs & 11yrs) I would be in an nuthouse for sure.
If anyone out there has a few pointers for me on what or how to help her I would be most grateful.
Peter
ok nanny--here goes..ive had 2 children born when i was in full addiction the first i was also on wethadone but had quit using for like 2 months before the birth-she had some tremors which were comforted by swaddling and as far as any other withdrawl we really didnt see any-but who know whats going on inside their little bodies they dont even know what pain and pleasure is she had about 4 days hard time in the night but not much more than normal-shed always stop when cleaned fed or cradled--somehow the meth bypassed her little body and she had a clean screen as i did not(for methadone) my second baby i used up untill an hour before i went to the hospital-i was very upfront about everything-and they were kind i gave him up for adoption, he had some of the tremors about 12 hours after birth and they considered puttin him on the methadone but they didnt and he actually went home before i was let out of the hospital and as far as i was told he did great-i think it all depends on your body chemistry and how much you use--ive come to find out that there is no scientific data linking opiates to disabilities or retatrdation as with some other drugs and my son is now 5 years old and just as perfect as can be-hes at his level and even in the 90th percentile as far as growth--your answers will come from the mom and with time--but making it into the world is 75%of the battle for opiate addicted babies-thats why they put you on methadone because the baby can die from withdrwl very easy(hopefully they find a better way)cuz like they said earlier we all know how terrible that sickness is and i cannot fathom what that does to a defensless newborn--ive shared this to help nanny,i would really appreciate it if everyone would be kind about this subject as it is a very painfull one for me and as i know everyone has always been wondefull to me i know what i did was a horrrible awful disgusting act,but trust me ive punished me enough--thanks--yours truly AMity
ps.the little girl was my first child and was taken from me by chilrens services my son i have now is my second and was born without having gone through addiction and the third was the little boy i put up for adoption and i know hes ok--i met the wonderfull couple who took him in despite the complications that coulve aarisen--deep breath
ps.the little girl was my first child and was taken from me by chilrens services my son i have now is my second and was born without having gone through addiction and the third was the little boy i put up for adoption and i know hes ok--i met the wonderfull couple who took him in despite the complications that coulve aarisen--deep breath
Amity, what you did well firstly were kind enough to help nanny........right there selfless........and as for anyone not being kind I'd beat them down.....LOL...if I could find them.........you know people, Amity....they are well people.
Honestly that was a brave, considerate, and honest post........and what you did in your past nooooooooooooo it was not dispicable or horrific, come on how many da*n people never used in life and just well you know what I mean.
Unless we been there.........who are we to ever judge, AND the fact you cared enough, loved enough, to give your kids a better life than ya could at that time...Amity, how many people............women have been that caring, and selfless, really?
My admiration for you and respect runs deep.........Amity!
Peter too.......glad to see ya feeling a bit better albeit for your poor friend.....I think Amity could best tell ya how to help her........you're a dear man, Peter.
Hope your doggie is doing well too..........and your friend seeks the Doctor's care.........and like I siad I only knew girls/women this happened to........and how they got through and how their babies were........and my friend who is the foster parent...........that little baby doll did great and her mom got clean.
There's always hope........always.........for all of us........you guys are appreciated.
Honestly that was a brave, considerate, and honest post........and what you did in your past nooooooooooooo it was not dispicable or horrific, come on how many da*n people never used in life and just well you know what I mean.
Unless we been there.........who are we to ever judge, AND the fact you cared enough, loved enough, to give your kids a better life than ya could at that time...Amity, how many people............women have been that caring, and selfless, really?
My admiration for you and respect runs deep.........Amity!
Peter too.......glad to see ya feeling a bit better albeit for your poor friend.....I think Amity could best tell ya how to help her........you're a dear man, Peter.
Hope your doggie is doing well too..........and your friend seeks the Doctor's care.........and like I siad I only knew girls/women this happened to........and how they got through and how their babies were........and my friend who is the foster parent...........that little baby doll did great and her mom got clean.
There's always hope........always.........for all of us........you guys are appreciated.
Amity,
This may mean jack s*it to ya.......and I don't talk about this too much, but it just made me think.
My mom was married.......pretty young......she had a full scholarship to a prestigious art school..........she's immensely talented.........and the plan was for her to do the school thing as we come from nothing and this was full paid.
So the married couple were to work and do school and kids were up the road....long ways up......no pill back then........and she gets pregnant with me.
Early 60's........still atime when your place was only to be home to raise your children..........so there went hopes and dreams of fashion design....she got to mold me instead........YIKES.......looking back she was always drawing and designing prints and stuff...........I could have cared less......I ain't got a creative bone in my body........not my thing.
Anyway, my biological father alcoholic........had it curbed as they had been young...........turns full out alcoholic..........my mom she don't take nuttin from nobody and I was still an infant........about almost a year she walks.....BYE!
All the court stuff comes and the custody stuff........my mom says "Ya know this will be tough on this kid, you and me as you're drunk".......and he said "You're right. She deserves better".........NEVER met the man.......never saw the man...........couldn't tell ya if I fell over him.
Know what Amity? If today I met him on the street I'd say THANK YOU......thank you so very much for being selfless enough to allow me a decent childhood...........dude could have at any time came back.......and two years ago in a really weird way I met his sister..........I mean weird.......like, well that was my sister-in-law............I say "Lady that's my mother".........lady starts crying then I am your aunt..........she assured me I was well oved......and I said "No need, I know that as your brother put his needs aside and allowed me one family, one father, one set of rules, one bed, and I always knew my home my one home"........and I told her not once did my mom ever say a bad word about him or his family and in fact I knew just who she was and her accomplishments this "aunt"................and we hugged and I said it was nice to meet you and tell your brother thank you for me, O.K.?
Her reply is "That I will and I know he already knows what a good father you had". Hoping your mom and brothers are well. Goodbye.
This maybe the post was more for me than you Amity, but honestly I'm grateful as I got to have a good life..........and a fabulous father and great siblings....I thought it was very, very caring for that man to allow me that.
You're a good woman...........selfless as all h*ll.......we get such grief for being so selfish and yeah we are.........the worse, but ain't one addict I have EVER met...........heroin addict........that under that drug isn't or wasn't overly kind, compassionate and caring.........true dat.
This may mean jack s*it to ya.......and I don't talk about this too much, but it just made me think.
My mom was married.......pretty young......she had a full scholarship to a prestigious art school..........she's immensely talented.........and the plan was for her to do the school thing as we come from nothing and this was full paid.
So the married couple were to work and do school and kids were up the road....long ways up......no pill back then........and she gets pregnant with me.
Early 60's........still atime when your place was only to be home to raise your children..........so there went hopes and dreams of fashion design....she got to mold me instead........YIKES.......looking back she was always drawing and designing prints and stuff...........I could have cared less......I ain't got a creative bone in my body........not my thing.
Anyway, my biological father alcoholic........had it curbed as they had been young...........turns full out alcoholic..........my mom she don't take nuttin from nobody and I was still an infant........about almost a year she walks.....BYE!
All the court stuff comes and the custody stuff........my mom says "Ya know this will be tough on this kid, you and me as you're drunk".......and he said "You're right. She deserves better".........NEVER met the man.......never saw the man...........couldn't tell ya if I fell over him.
Know what Amity? If today I met him on the street I'd say THANK YOU......thank you so very much for being selfless enough to allow me a decent childhood...........dude could have at any time came back.......and two years ago in a really weird way I met his sister..........I mean weird.......like, well that was my sister-in-law............I say "Lady that's my mother".........lady starts crying then I am your aunt..........she assured me I was well oved......and I said "No need, I know that as your brother put his needs aside and allowed me one family, one father, one set of rules, one bed, and I always knew my home my one home"........and I told her not once did my mom ever say a bad word about him or his family and in fact I knew just who she was and her accomplishments this "aunt"................and we hugged and I said it was nice to meet you and tell your brother thank you for me, O.K.?
Her reply is "That I will and I know he already knows what a good father you had". Hoping your mom and brothers are well. Goodbye.
This maybe the post was more for me than you Amity, but honestly I'm grateful as I got to have a good life..........and a fabulous father and great siblings....I thought it was very, very caring for that man to allow me that.
You're a good woman...........selfless as all h*ll.......we get such grief for being so selfish and yeah we are.........the worse, but ain't one addict I have EVER met...........heroin addict........that under that drug isn't or wasn't overly kind, compassionate and caring.........true dat.
haia all,
this is something i dont like to say much about either,most definately cos im sooo ashamed ov myself,and guilty,my eldest daughter is 10 yrs old and i did nothing while expecting her,even gave up my ciggies,and she was born a month prem,weighing 3 pounds i was only 19 and she was my first,i was s*** scared,when shes 3 yrs old i srart on the heroin,i had been on it about 3 yrs and hadnt had a period for two yrs,when i find out im four months preg, im also on 45 ml ov meth,i did cut down using,the docs also didnt want me to go down on my meth,but i started doing it myself at home,got down to 15mls,i had my last bit ov heroin about 2 weeks before she was born,even doing it i felt like s***,i always said i would never do anything like that while expecting,but i also thought i would never become a H addict,i had to stay in hospital for three days to keep watch on her,but luckily she was fine ,didnt seem to have any withdrawals at all,both girls are happy healthy ,and clever ,but i still feel guilty all the time,i didnt pick up the other night,but i did have one bag yesterday,pointless i know,but it took the edge away,so far so good today,hope i can get through the night
seren**
this is something i dont like to say much about either,most definately cos im sooo ashamed ov myself,and guilty,my eldest daughter is 10 yrs old and i did nothing while expecting her,even gave up my ciggies,and she was born a month prem,weighing 3 pounds i was only 19 and she was my first,i was s*** scared,when shes 3 yrs old i srart on the heroin,i had been on it about 3 yrs and hadnt had a period for two yrs,when i find out im four months preg, im also on 45 ml ov meth,i did cut down using,the docs also didnt want me to go down on my meth,but i started doing it myself at home,got down to 15mls,i had my last bit ov heroin about 2 weeks before she was born,even doing it i felt like s***,i always said i would never do anything like that while expecting,but i also thought i would never become a H addict,i had to stay in hospital for three days to keep watch on her,but luckily she was fine ,didnt seem to have any withdrawals at all,both girls are happy healthy ,and clever ,but i still feel guilty all the time,i didnt pick up the other night,but i did have one bag yesterday,pointless i know,but it took the edge away,so far so good today,hope i can get through the night
seren**
i know two women who had babies while in active use the 1st women i was acually in rehad with. She was ordered by childrens services here in OHIO to go to rehab. The hospital contacted childrens services when the baby tested +. The baby was taken from his mom for a few months. She was a really good friend of mine her son was diagnosed as a toddler with apraxia - 1. a disorder of voluntary movement, consisting in partial or complete incapacity to execute purposeful movements, without impairment of muscular power, sensibility and coordination. 2. a psycho-motor deficit in which one is unable to properly use a known object.
The other women was a childhood long term friend of mine she is a mother to 4 kids....two kids she had while active, one on methadone, the other drug free. The one she had was a girl while in active addition is by most standards healthy. The other a boy "born after the girl" is very screwed up. Poor Kid is blind and very disable she acually gave him up to her mother he requires 24 hour care can't eat on his own wears diapers he's 6 now. The one born while she was on methadone is fine has never had any issues to date she's 4 years old was small at birth 5 pounds 5 ounces. Her last kid is fine to. However her doctor has told her the kid that is disable may have been that way either way she has a family history of mental retardation.
At this point I have no advice but, it's scary to me!. a lot of times it's all okay i do personally know of that one kid who will never be okay. Just take it as it comes be sure to be honest with the mothers doctors. I do hope all works out for the best but, because i do know that kid who's very damaged i feel A duty to be honest about the fact it don't always work out just fine. However there was no proof for sure her using made him that way. I feel for ya it was terrible for me just watching friends go thru the emotions being addicted and mothers or pregnant . I got pregnant myself just freash off methadone still in methadone withdraws i was detoxing out left the clinic at 30mg was pregnant right after.
The other women was a childhood long term friend of mine she is a mother to 4 kids....two kids she had while active, one on methadone, the other drug free. The one she had was a girl while in active addition is by most standards healthy. The other a boy "born after the girl" is very screwed up. Poor Kid is blind and very disable she acually gave him up to her mother he requires 24 hour care can't eat on his own wears diapers he's 6 now. The one born while she was on methadone is fine has never had any issues to date she's 4 years old was small at birth 5 pounds 5 ounces. Her last kid is fine to. However her doctor has told her the kid that is disable may have been that way either way she has a family history of mental retardation.
At this point I have no advice but, it's scary to me!. a lot of times it's all okay i do personally know of that one kid who will never be okay. Just take it as it comes be sure to be honest with the mothers doctors. I do hope all works out for the best but, because i do know that kid who's very damaged i feel A duty to be honest about the fact it don't always work out just fine. However there was no proof for sure her using made him that way. I feel for ya it was terrible for me just watching friends go thru the emotions being addicted and mothers or pregnant . I got pregnant myself just freash off methadone still in methadone withdraws i was detoxing out left the clinic at 30mg was pregnant right after.
Hope all goes well for you and your grandson and his mother Nanny.
Seren, you're doing fantastically, you knew this wasn't gonna be easy...hope you make it through the night.
Amity, you'll get no punishment or judgement from anyone in here. The only thing I find disgusting is people's attitudes when they show prejudice or think they're better than others and have the right to judge. You're one of life's good people.
Maddy x
Seren, you're doing fantastically, you knew this wasn't gonna be easy...hope you make it through the night.
Amity, you'll get no punishment or judgement from anyone in here. The only thing I find disgusting is people's attitudes when they show prejudice or think they're better than others and have the right to judge. You're one of life's good people.
Maddy x
hear , hear .. my friend with the h.babies was slagged off 2 the max. she is a really really nice girl . only problem is , she has the same " disease " we've all got..
Wow I find this really interesting.I have never known anyone who has had a baby while addicted to heroin...infact I never really knew an addict till Kevin became one!!
