Hi everyone, I haven't been on here for awhile and am not sure if anyone remembers me. I've been wanting to post lately but embarrassment has kept me from doing it. But I've come to a place where I truly get that I have to put my recovery first or I'm not gonna make it. When I was posting here and spending time here was the longest I've ever gone without using drugs in 5 years. I also am in desperate need for honesty. I feel like I've been lying to so many people in my life- I'm really scared I've lost the ability to even tell the truth. So here I am....I hope everyone has been well, this is such an amazing and supportive place, I've really missed it.
Molly
P.S. Momnmore if you are reading this, where did you get your signature picture? It's so warm and comforting- I love looking at it:))
Hi Santee,
I remember you, in fact, I came across your name in my email the other day and wondered about you? How's it going? Care to share what's happened since you were last here? Are you trying to get clean again? I only ask to see how and what you are seeking from here.
Welcome back. It's so great to see people who fade away make it back.
Hugs,
Stacey
I remember you, in fact, I came across your name in my email the other day and wondered about you? How's it going? Care to share what's happened since you were last here? Are you trying to get clean again? I only ask to see how and what you are seeking from here.
Welcome back. It's so great to see people who fade away make it back.
Hugs,
Stacey
Hi Stacey!
Good to hear from you...Things have pretty much gone downhill since I was here last (big shocker). Lots of hard life stuff which I could never seem to get through clean. I feel like things are finally turning around for us and I'm seeing the light at the end of the tunnel for my family in terms of finances, marriage troubles etc... We've made some tough but good discions and I feel we are on the right track for the first time in a LONG time. That being said, my addiction remains untreated, recovery taking a back seat to all the other stuff going on. Not enough time, no one to watch my kids, no money for childcare, to stressed to quit, blah blah blah....All very real problems but also just excuses I know. So yes, I'm wanting to stop, I can't do it on my own and am trying to find ways of getting support. I'm going to one meeting/ week which I know is not enough. I really like the meeting but it is big and I have yet to share or really talk to anyone. I don't know why I find it so difficult-just so much shame and guilt. I hate the depression I go through when I quit- I try to tell myself it's temporary but one day feels like one year and I never make it for long.
Good to hear from you...Things have pretty much gone downhill since I was here last (big shocker). Lots of hard life stuff which I could never seem to get through clean. I feel like things are finally turning around for us and I'm seeing the light at the end of the tunnel for my family in terms of finances, marriage troubles etc... We've made some tough but good discions and I feel we are on the right track for the first time in a LONG time. That being said, my addiction remains untreated, recovery taking a back seat to all the other stuff going on. Not enough time, no one to watch my kids, no money for childcare, to stressed to quit, blah blah blah....All very real problems but also just excuses I know. So yes, I'm wanting to stop, I can't do it on my own and am trying to find ways of getting support. I'm going to one meeting/ week which I know is not enough. I really like the meeting but it is big and I have yet to share or really talk to anyone. I don't know why I find it so difficult-just so much shame and guilt. I hate the depression I go through when I quit- I try to tell myself it's temporary but one day feels like one year and I never make it for long.