Callie,
I saw your post on another thread and didn't want to "hyjack" it.
I took suboxone and went to meetings. Most of us were taking suboxone and no one said a word. I hid my addiction for 5 years, if I had to hide my suboxone use I wouldn't have gone to meetings.
If you choose to go to a meeting and someone doesn't like it that your taking suboxone tell them to "take a hike". I am sure no one will have a negative thing to say, suboxone is really well known today and is recognized as a wonderful recovery tool.
Catherine
Thanks Catherine
You have no idea how it feels to be able to finally talk about this to someone. I've been completely on my own with my addiction and I was just about ready to lose it when I came across the information about Suboxone. I'm so early in my recovery that I still have alot of unanswered questions and I know at some point, I'll have to withdraw from the Sub but for now, I'm just so thankful that I have a life to look forward to now. Without the treatment study, I would have had to withdraw cold turkey from 200 to 220mgs. of oxy a day. I wouldn't have made it. I would have found a way to use and just kept using. So, no...I won't let anyone intimidate me with their opinions of my method of recovery.
You have no idea how it feels to be able to finally talk about this to someone. I've been completely on my own with my addiction and I was just about ready to lose it when I came across the information about Suboxone. I'm so early in my recovery that I still have alot of unanswered questions and I know at some point, I'll have to withdraw from the Sub but for now, I'm just so thankful that I have a life to look forward to now. Without the treatment study, I would have had to withdraw cold turkey from 200 to 220mgs. of oxy a day. I wouldn't have made it. I would have found a way to use and just kept using. So, no...I won't let anyone intimidate me with their opinions of my method of recovery.
Callie,
When I started suboxone I was frightened and confused. (I never counted MS's but I do know that I could take as many as 30 pills a day.) It seems like when people start taking suboxone the first few days are a roller coaster of emotions. Then there are people who just feel great.
I was on the roller coaster. When I left my doctors office I began thinking clearly for the first time in years. I was afraid to drive. I was concerned that I would hurt someone driving under the influence. I never felt that way after taking fist full's of my pills! For the first time I really thought about my addiction. I made excuses before, my surgerys, all my pain etc. I accepted that I did it to myself and stopped blaming everyone else in the world for my addiction.
My doctor told me to go to "a meeting". I had no idea what "a meeting" was. I was welcomed and no one told me I couldn't be there because I was taking suboxone. Suboxone saved my life. Suboxone has saved a lot of lives. I went to "AA/NA Suboxone Meetings" lol. The whole bunch was taking it or had stopped so there were no anti-suboxone people in the bunch. The no suboxone must be ignorance on a lot of peoples part.
You are saving your life. Keep your eye on the prize. Keep focused on your recovery. Don't let anyone or anything get in your way.
Keep posting and telling your story. By telling your story you are helping you and you are helping a lot of faceless people out there. (called "lerkers" here)
Catherine
When I started suboxone I was frightened and confused. (I never counted MS's but I do know that I could take as many as 30 pills a day.) It seems like when people start taking suboxone the first few days are a roller coaster of emotions. Then there are people who just feel great.
I was on the roller coaster. When I left my doctors office I began thinking clearly for the first time in years. I was afraid to drive. I was concerned that I would hurt someone driving under the influence. I never felt that way after taking fist full's of my pills! For the first time I really thought about my addiction. I made excuses before, my surgerys, all my pain etc. I accepted that I did it to myself and stopped blaming everyone else in the world for my addiction.
My doctor told me to go to "a meeting". I had no idea what "a meeting" was. I was welcomed and no one told me I couldn't be there because I was taking suboxone. Suboxone saved my life. Suboxone has saved a lot of lives. I went to "AA/NA Suboxone Meetings" lol. The whole bunch was taking it or had stopped so there were no anti-suboxone people in the bunch. The no suboxone must be ignorance on a lot of peoples part.
You are saving your life. Keep your eye on the prize. Keep focused on your recovery. Don't let anyone or anything get in your way.
Keep posting and telling your story. By telling your story you are helping you and you are helping a lot of faceless people out there. (called "lerkers" here)
Catherine
Give the suboxone time for your body to get used to it. Sleepless nights, sweating and constipation are common side effects. Talk to your doctor about it so you dose can be changed until you are comfortable.
Good night, I hope to talk to you tomorrow.
Catherine
Catherine,
How long did you take the Suboxone? I'll start tapering after 2 weeks if I'm stable enough. Did you get high from it at first? I did and it scared the crap out of me because I thought you couldn't get high. I thought something was wrong and I freaked. My anxiety level was so high the first 2 days, I didn't think I'd be able to take the suboxone. I'm wondering about appetite too. I have trouble eating anyway but it's much worse now. I have to force myself to eat. Will that get better?
Oh my gosh, didn't you say you had the flu? Here I am jabbering at you and you probably need to get to bed! Feel better and thanks again.
~Callie~
How long did you take the Suboxone? I'll start tapering after 2 weeks if I'm stable enough. Did you get high from it at first? I did and it scared the crap out of me because I thought you couldn't get high. I thought something was wrong and I freaked. My anxiety level was so high the first 2 days, I didn't think I'd be able to take the suboxone. I'm wondering about appetite too. I have trouble eating anyway but it's much worse now. I have to force myself to eat. Will that get better?
Oh my gosh, didn't you say you had the flu? Here I am jabbering at you and you probably need to get to bed! Feel better and thanks again.
~Callie~
Callie,
I took suboxone for 22 days total. I started at 24 MG's and my doctor started my taper in 3 days in his office. His taper schedule was very strict and was tailored for me. I stopped taking it at 2 MG's.
I didn't get a buzz from suboxone. I hear it can happen. Suboxone is strong powerful stuff. My doctor lectured me all about it before I began treatment. I must say because of what he told me about it I was a little frightened of it. I respected it is a better word, so I followed his rules to a "T".
My doctor put me on a diet of fresh fruit and vegatables and 8 glasses of water a day. I drank Ensure (and slim fast) for nutritional suplements.
I had a 3 level cervical fusion (and other stuff) and with the surgerys and my drug addiction my health was shot. It was important that I learn to eat right and get my body strong so I could continue to live pill free.
Yes your appetite will get better. Force yourself to eat, your body needs fuel. Fruit is easy to munch on. Get some Esure or slim fast both are nutritional suplements. Bananas made me feel better.
Yep I have the flu. It hit like a ton of bricks last night. We went out for Sushi and I was sure I had been poisoned but darnit I'm really sick.lol
I think I will call it a night. But my poor sick body to bed.
Catherine
I took suboxone for 22 days total. I started at 24 MG's and my doctor started my taper in 3 days in his office. His taper schedule was very strict and was tailored for me. I stopped taking it at 2 MG's.
I didn't get a buzz from suboxone. I hear it can happen. Suboxone is strong powerful stuff. My doctor lectured me all about it before I began treatment. I must say because of what he told me about it I was a little frightened of it. I respected it is a better word, so I followed his rules to a "T".
My doctor put me on a diet of fresh fruit and vegatables and 8 glasses of water a day. I drank Ensure (and slim fast) for nutritional suplements.
I had a 3 level cervical fusion (and other stuff) and with the surgerys and my drug addiction my health was shot. It was important that I learn to eat right and get my body strong so I could continue to live pill free.
Yes your appetite will get better. Force yourself to eat, your body needs fuel. Fruit is easy to munch on. Get some Esure or slim fast both are nutritional suplements. Bananas made me feel better.
Yep I have the flu. It hit like a ton of bricks last night. We went out for Sushi and I was sure I had been poisoned but darnit I'm really sick.lol
I think I will call it a night. But my poor sick body to bed.
Catherine
Hey Callie!
I wanted to welcome you to the board and your new beginning! It is a real exciting and confusing time when you get started on suboxone.
I just wanted to tell you that you will be just fine...if you have been induced and are now stabilizing then you are on your way.
My experience was not unique it was just a little bit different as we all have a different experience on sub.
I had no ill side effects whatsoever....the first night I felt completely normal and slept like a baby. I had no headache, no nausea and just felt fine. However, I did suffer from constipation which is fairly normal. My appetite also suffered some...food tasted like cardboard and all I was interested in eating was sweets!! This will also subside as you decrease. Other than that....nothing....I cruised through my treatment for the most part but I also was under strict supervision from my Doc...an addiction specialist!! I started at 12mgs and tapered within months to 8mgs...then 4mgs...then 2mgs...then 1mg or less to finally dust. I have been completely off for 11 days now and my treatment lasted 8.5 months.
If I can offer any advice to remain clean it would be to educate yourself about your addiction and go to meetings...AA/NA is fantastic. I also started private therapy and continue today...it has aided me tremendously. It sounds like you are in good hands with the "study" and will be off soon....so in that time get armed!!!
Good luck and feel free to ask any questions of me. I never believed that I would be pill free....one year ago I was on the merry go round and hating life! Today I am better than I was prior to my 5 year addiction!!
Big hugs...kee kee
I wanted to welcome you to the board and your new beginning! It is a real exciting and confusing time when you get started on suboxone.
I just wanted to tell you that you will be just fine...if you have been induced and are now stabilizing then you are on your way.
My experience was not unique it was just a little bit different as we all have a different experience on sub.
I had no ill side effects whatsoever....the first night I felt completely normal and slept like a baby. I had no headache, no nausea and just felt fine. However, I did suffer from constipation which is fairly normal. My appetite also suffered some...food tasted like cardboard and all I was interested in eating was sweets!! This will also subside as you decrease. Other than that....nothing....I cruised through my treatment for the most part but I also was under strict supervision from my Doc...an addiction specialist!! I started at 12mgs and tapered within months to 8mgs...then 4mgs...then 2mgs...then 1mg or less to finally dust. I have been completely off for 11 days now and my treatment lasted 8.5 months.
If I can offer any advice to remain clean it would be to educate yourself about your addiction and go to meetings...AA/NA is fantastic. I also started private therapy and continue today...it has aided me tremendously. It sounds like you are in good hands with the "study" and will be off soon....so in that time get armed!!!
Good luck and feel free to ask any questions of me. I never believed that I would be pill free....one year ago I was on the merry go round and hating life! Today I am better than I was prior to my 5 year addiction!!
Big hugs...kee kee
Hi Kee Kee!
Thanks for your wonderful message. It was so encouraging to hear that you (and others) have successfully completed Suboxone treatment. I've already begun meetings. I used to know about only a couple in my area but since I stopped going to meetings, there have been some different ones popping up. I'm excited about one that's within walking distance of my house. Not only will it be reason to get out and walk, it's NA AND OCD! You know...It just occured to me, so many addicts and alcoholics have OCD but in all the time I was active in AA (my drug of choice before I relapsed was booze), no one really ever talked much about it. I think it's great that I'll have support now in 2 areas of my life that cause me grief! I'm so proud of you for all your hard work, Kee Kee. I know I'm on my way and I'll be fine. It's just been a long time in coming and there have been so many tragedies in my life along the way that I'm just now beginning to deal with that it's an incredibly bumpy ride right now. I do have family but, like I said, no one knows about my struggle yet so I'm dealing with things on my own for now. I know you're going to say that I need to tell my family because I need their support and in a perfect world, I would. Daddy has been dead for 4 years and my mom passed away just 3 weeks ago. I have 3 brothers left (my oldest brother died at 50 of Cirrosis) and 2 sisters. All of them are alcoholics or addicts. I know they care about me but their addictions won't allow them to support me in my effort to get healthy so it's best if I steer clear of them til I have a handle on things. I've already set a date to visit my daughter and tell her. That's gonna be the hard one. She's going to worry herself to death over me and I hate that I'm going to cause her so much distress. My son is just back from Iraq so I'll give him a couple more weeks to adjust to being back and I'll tell him as well. My kids are my world and it just turns my stomach to have to admit to them again that their mother can't get her sh--t together. Big sigh!
Love chatting with you. It helps so much to know that someone understands. I live in such a small town and everyone knows me (or they think they do. HA!) it's hard to pretend everything is ok when it's not. Besides that, our town is so small we don't have access to a medical community that equipped to deal with addiction like some of the larger town. One doctor I went to here said that if I couldn't afford to go into treatment, I'd just have to tough it (withdrawals) out. Now there's a plan for success!!!
~Callie~
Thanks for your wonderful message. It was so encouraging to hear that you (and others) have successfully completed Suboxone treatment. I've already begun meetings. I used to know about only a couple in my area but since I stopped going to meetings, there have been some different ones popping up. I'm excited about one that's within walking distance of my house. Not only will it be reason to get out and walk, it's NA AND OCD! You know...It just occured to me, so many addicts and alcoholics have OCD but in all the time I was active in AA (my drug of choice before I relapsed was booze), no one really ever talked much about it. I think it's great that I'll have support now in 2 areas of my life that cause me grief! I'm so proud of you for all your hard work, Kee Kee. I know I'm on my way and I'll be fine. It's just been a long time in coming and there have been so many tragedies in my life along the way that I'm just now beginning to deal with that it's an incredibly bumpy ride right now. I do have family but, like I said, no one knows about my struggle yet so I'm dealing with things on my own for now. I know you're going to say that I need to tell my family because I need their support and in a perfect world, I would. Daddy has been dead for 4 years and my mom passed away just 3 weeks ago. I have 3 brothers left (my oldest brother died at 50 of Cirrosis) and 2 sisters. All of them are alcoholics or addicts. I know they care about me but their addictions won't allow them to support me in my effort to get healthy so it's best if I steer clear of them til I have a handle on things. I've already set a date to visit my daughter and tell her. That's gonna be the hard one. She's going to worry herself to death over me and I hate that I'm going to cause her so much distress. My son is just back from Iraq so I'll give him a couple more weeks to adjust to being back and I'll tell him as well. My kids are my world and it just turns my stomach to have to admit to them again that their mother can't get her sh--t together. Big sigh!
Love chatting with you. It helps so much to know that someone understands. I live in such a small town and everyone knows me (or they think they do. HA!) it's hard to pretend everything is ok when it's not. Besides that, our town is so small we don't have access to a medical community that equipped to deal with addiction like some of the larger town. One doctor I went to here said that if I couldn't afford to go into treatment, I'd just have to tough it (withdrawals) out. Now there's a plan for success!!!
~Callie~
Evening Callie,
Kee Kee is a hell of an inspiration don't you think? I knew she would show up and tell you her suboxone story. Stick with Kee Kee she knows her stuff.
We are members of the "We love Suboxone Club". There is a lot of suboxone bashing. The bashing comes from people who are ignorant of the drug and make things up about it. Then there are the people who have taken it with out a doctor and get themselves in trouble with it. Either way don't listen to the bashing it's just made up poop to make themselves feel better.
I could not tell my family either. Both parents have passed away. I cared for my mother for 5 years until her passing. That one tore my guts out. My father who I was estranged from passed away 1 year before I got clean. I got to be with him for 6 days in the hospital before he passed. That one kept my head spinning for some time. (Thank god for pills. lol) My brother and sister are just cold fish. Those two are the last people to go to if you have a problem. I was terrified that someone at work would find out. My list of "No one can find out" was long and overwhelming.
I sat on my pity pot for years feeling sorry for myself. No family, poor me, poor me. I have a serious injury and no one cares, poor me, poor me. My husband was delighted when I told him I was going to take suboxone. He is my rock. He didn't understand the pills so I could never go to him. I found help with other addicts. Other addicts understand what hell this is.
Keep posting!
Catherine
Kee Kee is a hell of an inspiration don't you think? I knew she would show up and tell you her suboxone story. Stick with Kee Kee she knows her stuff.
We are members of the "We love Suboxone Club". There is a lot of suboxone bashing. The bashing comes from people who are ignorant of the drug and make things up about it. Then there are the people who have taken it with out a doctor and get themselves in trouble with it. Either way don't listen to the bashing it's just made up poop to make themselves feel better.
I could not tell my family either. Both parents have passed away. I cared for my mother for 5 years until her passing. That one tore my guts out. My father who I was estranged from passed away 1 year before I got clean. I got to be with him for 6 days in the hospital before he passed. That one kept my head spinning for some time. (Thank god for pills. lol) My brother and sister are just cold fish. Those two are the last people to go to if you have a problem. I was terrified that someone at work would find out. My list of "No one can find out" was long and overwhelming.
I sat on my pity pot for years feeling sorry for myself. No family, poor me, poor me. I have a serious injury and no one cares, poor me, poor me. My husband was delighted when I told him I was going to take suboxone. He is my rock. He didn't understand the pills so I could never go to him. I found help with other addicts. Other addicts understand what hell this is.
Keep posting!
Catherine
Hi Catherine!
Are you feeling better? Yes, I love hearing Kee Kee's story. I'll latch on to anyone who has a success story to tell. You know...I've not been on the Sub long enough to have a definite opinion yet and the first day and night were not at all something I'd sign up for again but so far, it's keeping me from using Oxy's. That's what I want and that's what I'm getting. I kind of suspected that some of the people that had a bad experience with Sub might not have used it correctly. And, Suboxone may not work for everyone but I don't expect (or really even want) a completely smooth ride with this. Fighting a disease is work and my health is worth fighting for. If Suboxone (or anything else) made recovery completely painless, wouldn't it be that much easier for us to think...."Well, I got out of trouble with drugs so easy before, I'll just go have some fun and if I get into trouble, there's always an easy out. I never ever want to have to live this life again so I'm committed to getting and staying clean. Whatever it takes! Hope you're having a great day,
~Callie~
Are you feeling better? Yes, I love hearing Kee Kee's story. I'll latch on to anyone who has a success story to tell. You know...I've not been on the Sub long enough to have a definite opinion yet and the first day and night were not at all something I'd sign up for again but so far, it's keeping me from using Oxy's. That's what I want and that's what I'm getting. I kind of suspected that some of the people that had a bad experience with Sub might not have used it correctly. And, Suboxone may not work for everyone but I don't expect (or really even want) a completely smooth ride with this. Fighting a disease is work and my health is worth fighting for. If Suboxone (or anything else) made recovery completely painless, wouldn't it be that much easier for us to think...."Well, I got out of trouble with drugs so easy before, I'll just go have some fun and if I get into trouble, there's always an easy out. I never ever want to have to live this life again so I'm committed to getting and staying clean. Whatever it takes! Hope you're having a great day,
~Callie~
Callie,
Wow, your attitude is perfect.
When I started taking suboxone I acceped that I had gotten myself into this mess I had to get myself out of it. I was expecting a bumpy road with suboxone but my experience was picture perfect. Quitting isn't easy and anyone who thinks there isn't any pain involved is fooling themselves. And quitting is the easy part, staying "quit" is an individual process that takes a lot of work.
Callie if your symptoms continue please contact your doctor. Your doctor must be made aware of how you are doing it's crutial for your suboxone success and your recovery success. Don't bite the bullet and just take it. My first week I was slightly uncomfortable (not miserable). When my dose was lowered It was smooth sailing from then on. We are all different and we all adjust to the medication in our own time and in our own way.
I think my flu has run it's course. I feel better today. Thank you for asking.
Catherine
Wow, your attitude is perfect.
When I started taking suboxone I acceped that I had gotten myself into this mess I had to get myself out of it. I was expecting a bumpy road with suboxone but my experience was picture perfect. Quitting isn't easy and anyone who thinks there isn't any pain involved is fooling themselves. And quitting is the easy part, staying "quit" is an individual process that takes a lot of work.
Callie if your symptoms continue please contact your doctor. Your doctor must be made aware of how you are doing it's crutial for your suboxone success and your recovery success. Don't bite the bullet and just take it. My first week I was slightly uncomfortable (not miserable). When my dose was lowered It was smooth sailing from then on. We are all different and we all adjust to the medication in our own time and in our own way.
I think my flu has run it's course. I feel better today. Thank you for asking.
Catherine
Catherine,
First, let me say that only those first 2 days were bad. I don't really know why I felt so unusually high and the doc doesn't know why either. He told me that night that I was ok though. The thing that really messed me up was the interaction with the nurses at the facility. I'm being dealt with separately from the treatment facility so the nurses there don't know me or my case. They were reprimanded for being so flippant about my concerns but they really aren't responsible for me and from what I was telling them, there wasn't any cause for alarm. I just didn't know that so I flipped out. I'm sure now, that's part of the reason I didn't sleep. With everything else I'd been dealing with, not having anyone to talk to about it and then having some nurse say "Uh, well...there's nobody here and I'm on my break", it just sent me over the edge. Even without having slept, the next day got better as it wore on and I calmed down. I've slept pretty well since then and I've adjusted to the dose. It still makes me a bit high when I first take it but then it subsides. Maybe the reason the docs don't know so much about the level of euphoria in some patients is because everybody else keeps their mouths shut about it! LOL
Anyway,I ate a good dinner last night and I'm not so anxious today. I think everything is going to be fine. I went back in today for a new script and my check in. Both doctors spoke with me and assured me that from now on, if something happens during off hours, the nurses at the facility have been instructed to call them right away. That made me feel better. Like they actually cared about me instead of simply gathering stats for their study.
Hey, I know I shouldn't leap off this ledge too soon and I should concentrate on today but I really am quite curious about the withdrawal from Sub. You're tapering was much slower than mine will be. I understand that, because this study is being funded they have to consider the amount of time that people are actually on the meds but I just hope I do ok tapering this quickly. I read that amino acids where a good suppliment for regenerating during recovery. I'm gonna ask if I might start taking something now to help. Can you tell I'm still worried about withdrawals? I talk big about being ready for the bumpy ride but I'm really just a big chicken!! Ha! All kidding aside, I've been in pretty severe withdrawals and it really is frightening.
First, let me say that only those first 2 days were bad. I don't really know why I felt so unusually high and the doc doesn't know why either. He told me that night that I was ok though. The thing that really messed me up was the interaction with the nurses at the facility. I'm being dealt with separately from the treatment facility so the nurses there don't know me or my case. They were reprimanded for being so flippant about my concerns but they really aren't responsible for me and from what I was telling them, there wasn't any cause for alarm. I just didn't know that so I flipped out. I'm sure now, that's part of the reason I didn't sleep. With everything else I'd been dealing with, not having anyone to talk to about it and then having some nurse say "Uh, well...there's nobody here and I'm on my break", it just sent me over the edge. Even without having slept, the next day got better as it wore on and I calmed down. I've slept pretty well since then and I've adjusted to the dose. It still makes me a bit high when I first take it but then it subsides. Maybe the reason the docs don't know so much about the level of euphoria in some patients is because everybody else keeps their mouths shut about it! LOL
Anyway,I ate a good dinner last night and I'm not so anxious today. I think everything is going to be fine. I went back in today for a new script and my check in. Both doctors spoke with me and assured me that from now on, if something happens during off hours, the nurses at the facility have been instructed to call them right away. That made me feel better. Like they actually cared about me instead of simply gathering stats for their study.
Hey, I know I shouldn't leap off this ledge too soon and I should concentrate on today but I really am quite curious about the withdrawal from Sub. You're tapering was much slower than mine will be. I understand that, because this study is being funded they have to consider the amount of time that people are actually on the meds but I just hope I do ok tapering this quickly. I read that amino acids where a good suppliment for regenerating during recovery. I'm gonna ask if I might start taking something now to help. Can you tell I'm still worried about withdrawals? I talk big about being ready for the bumpy ride but I'm really just a big chicken!! Ha! All kidding aside, I've been in pretty severe withdrawals and it really is frightening.
Callie,
For the first 3 says I was taking suboxone I felt "disoriented". I really don't know any better way to describe it. It wasn't a strong feeling, it was just there. I described my feelings to my doctor and he lowered my dose. I felt better almost immediately. Maybe I was feeling "high" and was such a basket case I didn't recognize it.
I am certain that my diet played a large roll in my successful taper and quit. I stuffed myself with fresh fruit and vegetables. I took a multi vitamin. I got out and walked a few feet as many times a day as I could. We were having a horrible heat wave and my doctor wanted me to exercise but was very concerned about my going out in the heat. I drank the nutritional supplement Ensure.
My health was in bad shape, I needed to get my strength back. I thought I was going to gain weight but I lost a lot of pounds. I am 5' 7" about 125 pounds. Loosing weight isn't really something I needed.
Having WD's with suboxone never crossed my mind. I read posts here about people having WD's and I chalked it up to suboxone self medicating.
I understand you are part of a study but that doesn't mean they are going to let you suffer. Has the treatment schedule been given to you? Do you already know what your taper schedule is? If at any time during your taper you don't feel good, contact your doctors immediately and inform them. If you are part of a study, help them. Give them as much information you can. Your input is going to help other people.
I won't give any detailed information about my taper. I don't want someone to use the information for their taper and maybe get themselves into trouble.
I started at 24 MGG. I began to taper on day 4. I tapered down every 4 days or so until I got to 2 MGS. My entire time was 22 days. I guess its easy to figure out but I was I was under strict doctor supervision. My dose was tailored for me. My health was monitored. My diet was regulated. I didn't budge from the instructions I was given.
You are not going to have WD's! A lot of the WD stories are made up. You are going to be fine. Concentrate on your future, concentrate on your recovery plan. You can make plans for the future now! Your life isn't going to depend on pills. Enroll in a college course for fall. Begin sculpting lessons. Go drive some new cars. What about skydiving? Do something you have always wanted to do. Thinking about pills and recovery 24/7 isn't good either.
Catherine
For the first 3 says I was taking suboxone I felt "disoriented". I really don't know any better way to describe it. It wasn't a strong feeling, it was just there. I described my feelings to my doctor and he lowered my dose. I felt better almost immediately. Maybe I was feeling "high" and was such a basket case I didn't recognize it.
I am certain that my diet played a large roll in my successful taper and quit. I stuffed myself with fresh fruit and vegetables. I took a multi vitamin. I got out and walked a few feet as many times a day as I could. We were having a horrible heat wave and my doctor wanted me to exercise but was very concerned about my going out in the heat. I drank the nutritional supplement Ensure.
My health was in bad shape, I needed to get my strength back. I thought I was going to gain weight but I lost a lot of pounds. I am 5' 7" about 125 pounds. Loosing weight isn't really something I needed.
Having WD's with suboxone never crossed my mind. I read posts here about people having WD's and I chalked it up to suboxone self medicating.
I understand you are part of a study but that doesn't mean they are going to let you suffer. Has the treatment schedule been given to you? Do you already know what your taper schedule is? If at any time during your taper you don't feel good, contact your doctors immediately and inform them. If you are part of a study, help them. Give them as much information you can. Your input is going to help other people.
I won't give any detailed information about my taper. I don't want someone to use the information for their taper and maybe get themselves into trouble.
I started at 24 MGG. I began to taper on day 4. I tapered down every 4 days or so until I got to 2 MGS. My entire time was 22 days. I guess its easy to figure out but I was I was under strict doctor supervision. My dose was tailored for me. My health was monitored. My diet was regulated. I didn't budge from the instructions I was given.
You are not going to have WD's! A lot of the WD stories are made up. You are going to be fine. Concentrate on your future, concentrate on your recovery plan. You can make plans for the future now! Your life isn't going to depend on pills. Enroll in a college course for fall. Begin sculpting lessons. Go drive some new cars. What about skydiving? Do something you have always wanted to do. Thinking about pills and recovery 24/7 isn't good either.
Catherine
Callie and Catherine!!
Good to see you both tonight!
Yep...I have to agree with you Catherine, you and I are on the very same page regarding suboxone.....it is an amazing tool for the down and out pill junkie that has lost all control of our power. We have been brought to our knees and are sick of ourselves and look at others with wonderment and amazement at how they actually function "normally". Am I hot or cold? LOL
Pill addiction crept up me like most but at its height I was terrified when I realized what had happened to me and sickened by myself that I let it get to level I did. By then my only concern was to keep the pills coming...not for the high because that was long long gone. I needed them to function and to not to be sick. This is when I started to realize the extent of my problem.
You name it...I did it....tapered, cold turkey, hid pills...had someone hold them, methadone. I even went to the hospital Christmas Eve cause I was sick as could be...fessed up only to be put in the "rubber room" and treated like a common junkie. Which I suppose I am but....it opened my eyes to the impatience and intolerance that people and people that are in the medical profession and should know better.
Okay...I am going off on a bit of a tangent here....but I guess my point is....I feel so fortunate to have finally found sobriety and recovery. I don't want my life to be run by this disease but I also realized that I lived it and breathed it everyday of my life for 5 years. For me to just get better and then act like it never happened to me is prosperous. Now I will work hard...who knows maybe for 5 more years to undo the damage I have done. I will be forever aware of this monster and its capability to creep out the corners of mind....so I will talk about my experience to help others and to continue to heal.
I wanted to tell you that if you feel it in your gut that you want off the pill ride from hell and you are down with suboxone and all that comes with it...you will win.
I broke my ankle rollerblading 5 months into my treatment and low and behold my little addict brain started spinning about the pain meds.....legit pain meds!! Wow....had it not been for all I have learned about addiction from all sources including this site and the amazing people here....well...you get the picture.
I am here for you as is Catherine and many others that have successfully come through suboxone treatment so use us....and don't be afraid to speak your mind...there is no judgement here.
Welcome aboard and buckle up honey....its going to be a fun and interesting and learned ride!
Good to see you both tonight!
Yep...I have to agree with you Catherine, you and I are on the very same page regarding suboxone.....it is an amazing tool for the down and out pill junkie that has lost all control of our power. We have been brought to our knees and are sick of ourselves and look at others with wonderment and amazement at how they actually function "normally". Am I hot or cold? LOL
Pill addiction crept up me like most but at its height I was terrified when I realized what had happened to me and sickened by myself that I let it get to level I did. By then my only concern was to keep the pills coming...not for the high because that was long long gone. I needed them to function and to not to be sick. This is when I started to realize the extent of my problem.
You name it...I did it....tapered, cold turkey, hid pills...had someone hold them, methadone. I even went to the hospital Christmas Eve cause I was sick as could be...fessed up only to be put in the "rubber room" and treated like a common junkie. Which I suppose I am but....it opened my eyes to the impatience and intolerance that people and people that are in the medical profession and should know better.
Okay...I am going off on a bit of a tangent here....but I guess my point is....I feel so fortunate to have finally found sobriety and recovery. I don't want my life to be run by this disease but I also realized that I lived it and breathed it everyday of my life for 5 years. For me to just get better and then act like it never happened to me is prosperous. Now I will work hard...who knows maybe for 5 more years to undo the damage I have done. I will be forever aware of this monster and its capability to creep out the corners of mind....so I will talk about my experience to help others and to continue to heal.
I wanted to tell you that if you feel it in your gut that you want off the pill ride from hell and you are down with suboxone and all that comes with it...you will win.
I broke my ankle rollerblading 5 months into my treatment and low and behold my little addict brain started spinning about the pain meds.....legit pain meds!! Wow....had it not been for all I have learned about addiction from all sources including this site and the amazing people here....well...you get the picture.
I am here for you as is Catherine and many others that have successfully come through suboxone treatment so use us....and don't be afraid to speak your mind...there is no judgement here.
Welcome aboard and buckle up honey....its going to be a fun and interesting and learned ride!
Thanks Catherine,
Good thinking on your part not to divulge tapering methods here. You have quelled my fears though, so...thank you for sharing. You know, I got to thinking. My taper will actually be a bit longer than yours. I'd got it in my head that you had been on it longer. Doesn't matter. You're clean and it sounds as if your getting healthier every day and I will be too. And no...the doctors won't let me suffer. They have a very specific plan for me and like you, I'll follow it to the letter. You're right about going on to live my life too. I've been busier in the weeks since my mother passed (that's another thing we have in common. My mother lived here with me for the past five years) than I've been in a long time. To meet her needs and to hide my addiction, I was isolated here. I had to quit working when my mom got so ill but I'm building my clientele up quite quickly and I'm working on some other ideas to incorporate into my business.
Being social again is going to be a big step for me. I divorced right before my mom came to live with me and lost touch with most of my friends that I knew as a couple and so I've been out of the loop for a while. I can feel your wheels spinning already little miss Catherine! Don't you even MENTION dating to me yet! I tried it for a while but I'm not ready. I need to clean up my act, get myself back on track professionally, physically, and emotionally before I offer myself up to anyone. I'll go sky diving instead, thank you very much! Well, maybe I can go test drive a new car? LOL
What I'm trying to say is, I really appreciate your thoughts about concentrating too much on recovery. It's just that all of this is so new. I suppose you'll find out sooner or later anyway but in addition to being an addict, I'm obsessive/compulsive so until I get a handle on it, my focus will be recovery. I know....I know...I'M A MESS!! (wink) You know though...I'm here not only to discuss recovery. I'm here because this is the first time in a long time that I've not been afraid to be who I am. I've lost so much confidence that the world has become an overwhelming place to me. I feel safe here and I've found comraderie among women who understand me and support me. I'll edge my way out there, for sure. I'm not one to be kept down for long but the last couple of nights that I've been able to come here and not be alone has been a comfort. My anxiety level is still pretty high at AA meetings so coming here has been my substitute. Before you know it though, you'll be wondering where I'm at and I'll be off sculpting some nude guy in a meadow somewhere! I know you understand how much you all mean to me right now and I'll say thank you again and good night.
~Callie~
Good thinking on your part not to divulge tapering methods here. You have quelled my fears though, so...thank you for sharing. You know, I got to thinking. My taper will actually be a bit longer than yours. I'd got it in my head that you had been on it longer. Doesn't matter. You're clean and it sounds as if your getting healthier every day and I will be too. And no...the doctors won't let me suffer. They have a very specific plan for me and like you, I'll follow it to the letter. You're right about going on to live my life too. I've been busier in the weeks since my mother passed (that's another thing we have in common. My mother lived here with me for the past five years) than I've been in a long time. To meet her needs and to hide my addiction, I was isolated here. I had to quit working when my mom got so ill but I'm building my clientele up quite quickly and I'm working on some other ideas to incorporate into my business.
Being social again is going to be a big step for me. I divorced right before my mom came to live with me and lost touch with most of my friends that I knew as a couple and so I've been out of the loop for a while. I can feel your wheels spinning already little miss Catherine! Don't you even MENTION dating to me yet! I tried it for a while but I'm not ready. I need to clean up my act, get myself back on track professionally, physically, and emotionally before I offer myself up to anyone. I'll go sky diving instead, thank you very much! Well, maybe I can go test drive a new car? LOL
What I'm trying to say is, I really appreciate your thoughts about concentrating too much on recovery. It's just that all of this is so new. I suppose you'll find out sooner or later anyway but in addition to being an addict, I'm obsessive/compulsive so until I get a handle on it, my focus will be recovery. I know....I know...I'M A MESS!! (wink) You know though...I'm here not only to discuss recovery. I'm here because this is the first time in a long time that I've not been afraid to be who I am. I've lost so much confidence that the world has become an overwhelming place to me. I feel safe here and I've found comraderie among women who understand me and support me. I'll edge my way out there, for sure. I'm not one to be kept down for long but the last couple of nights that I've been able to come here and not be alone has been a comfort. My anxiety level is still pretty high at AA meetings so coming here has been my substitute. Before you know it though, you'll be wondering where I'm at and I'll be off sculpting some nude guy in a meadow somewhere! I know you understand how much you all mean to me right now and I'll say thank you again and good night.
~Callie~
Kee Kee,
I didn't even get to chat with you tonight! I've had a long day (but a good day) so I'm going to bed. Hope to see you tomorrow?
~Callie~
I didn't even get to chat with you tonight! I've had a long day (but a good day) so I'm going to bed. Hope to see you tomorrow?
~Callie~
Callie,
Baby steps, keep taking baby steps. I wouldn't recommend going out and finding a man any time soon. In your present state of mind there is no way for you to know if you have found the perfect guy or a serial killer. Lol
Good night, see you tomorrow
Catherine
Baby steps, keep taking baby steps. I wouldn't recommend going out and finding a man any time soon. In your present state of mind there is no way for you to know if you have found the perfect guy or a serial killer. Lol
Good night, see you tomorrow
Catherine
Hey Callie!
Hi Catherine!
Callie....Catherine celebrates 1 year clean today! A shining example of how it can be done.
How are you feeling today? I look forward to catching up with you. Hoping all is well. Check in when you can!
Big hugs...
Hi Catherine!
Callie....Catherine celebrates 1 year clean today! A shining example of how it can be done.
How are you feeling today? I look forward to catching up with you. Hoping all is well. Check in when you can!
Big hugs...
Kee Kee!
I just popped back in to steady myself after a little bit of an "incident". I was doing laundry and found a 40mg. tablet of Oxycontin. After staring at it for a while, I tossed it in the garbage. I obsessed about it for another while and finally fished it out of the garbage and poked it into the kitchen sink and ran hot water over it. It's gone and I'm fine now. HOLY CRAPPINOLI!! I cannot believe what control a little pill can have over a person. Anyway! It's over. Kinda pisses me off though! Before I started recovery, I'd turn this house upside down looking for pills and never found one. Then, when I started the Sub, I made another sweep just to make sure I didn't have some stuck away somewhere. To come across it by accident like that was a shock but I'm proud of myself for doing the right thing. I know I wouldn't have been able to do that without the Sub or without this site. THAT'S how I'm doing today! I'm gonna go finish up my chores for now but I wanted to let you know I'll most likely be on later. It's kind of a bummer for me because it seems as though a lot of people who post here are on EST and I'm on the west coast. Lot's of you are off the site just when I'm coming in for the evening. Oh well!
I've already left Catherine a note in celebration of her birthday. It's pretty great, isn't it! Gotta run for now....hope to catch you later! Thanks for thinking of me.
~Callie~
I just popped back in to steady myself after a little bit of an "incident". I was doing laundry and found a 40mg. tablet of Oxycontin. After staring at it for a while, I tossed it in the garbage. I obsessed about it for another while and finally fished it out of the garbage and poked it into the kitchen sink and ran hot water over it. It's gone and I'm fine now. HOLY CRAPPINOLI!! I cannot believe what control a little pill can have over a person. Anyway! It's over. Kinda pisses me off though! Before I started recovery, I'd turn this house upside down looking for pills and never found one. Then, when I started the Sub, I made another sweep just to make sure I didn't have some stuck away somewhere. To come across it by accident like that was a shock but I'm proud of myself for doing the right thing. I know I wouldn't have been able to do that without the Sub or without this site. THAT'S how I'm doing today! I'm gonna go finish up my chores for now but I wanted to let you know I'll most likely be on later. It's kind of a bummer for me because it seems as though a lot of people who post here are on EST and I'm on the west coast. Lot's of you are off the site just when I'm coming in for the evening. Oh well!
I've already left Catherine a note in celebration of her birthday. It's pretty great, isn't it! Gotta run for now....hope to catch you later! Thanks for thinking of me.
~Callie~
Callie....Im getting ready to shower & go out but had to just HAD to say...though I may not know you well...Im so proud of you for tossing that!!! You are strong willed that I can tell.
suboxone saved my life & though I may be on it a very very long time,its so much better than eating 20+ pills a day
KEEP UP THE AWESOME WORK!!!!!
MJ
suboxone saved my life & though I may be on it a very very long time,its so much better than eating 20+ pills a day
KEEP UP THE AWESOME WORK!!!!!
MJ