Jack,
a lot of people are concerned about you....as you have expressed a lot of concern about others here (me for one) in the past.
if you are struggling still...this be the place to air it all out...
i know you're there..
love MARY
Hi Mary-and all
I guess Im feel foolish. To stay away from dope fpr so long,and then to pick-up again on a whim like that was insane. I now have so much to lose.
OK-it was just a slip -but man after all that time? What was I thinking?
Well -Im finished beating myself up over it. I went and picked up my bottles today (still 35 mgs of mdone) and I didnt have to leave a sample. So for better or worse -I got away with using & at the clinic I wont lose any privledges.
It is just not worth telling my counsler about this. She will make a bigger deal out of it than ever, and I would end up losing a few take homes. I dont see how that would help anything- hell I would have to go down there even more.
I know I must get back into my meetings and find a sponser.
Thank God it was just a one time lapse- and thank all of you guys for your concern and support.
It doesnt matter if you havent used in 1 day or 10 years- it can happen just like that!!-
When they say 1 day at a time they sure arent kidding!
See what happens when you get a little lazy in recovery or attempt at recovery
much love & respect to all
jack
I guess Im feel foolish. To stay away from dope fpr so long,and then to pick-up again on a whim like that was insane. I now have so much to lose.
OK-it was just a slip -but man after all that time? What was I thinking?
Well -Im finished beating myself up over it. I went and picked up my bottles today (still 35 mgs of mdone) and I didnt have to leave a sample. So for better or worse -I got away with using & at the clinic I wont lose any privledges.
It is just not worth telling my counsler about this. She will make a bigger deal out of it than ever, and I would end up losing a few take homes. I dont see how that would help anything- hell I would have to go down there even more.
I know I must get back into my meetings and find a sponser.
Thank God it was just a one time lapse- and thank all of you guys for your concern and support.
It doesnt matter if you havent used in 1 day or 10 years- it can happen just like that!!-
When they say 1 day at a time they sure arent kidding!
See what happens when you get a little lazy in recovery or attempt at recovery
much love & respect to all
jack
Dear Jack,
I'm so glad to hear it was a little slip and that you're getting back to posting and working your recovery. :)
From your post...."I know I must get back into my meetings and find a sponser."
Sound like a GREAT idea!
Love,
Susan
I'm so glad to hear it was a little slip and that you're getting back to posting and working your recovery. :)
From your post...."I know I must get back into my meetings and find a sponser."
Sound like a GREAT idea!
Love,
Susan
Hey Jack, One Day at a Time is right, you slipped up but you are making ways of correcting it so you can continue with your recovery and that is whats important. All of this stuff that's going on with your husband must be really tough on you, especially when you are trying to clean yourself up. I agree with you, no one else needs to know what happened besides yourself, it'll do more harm then good. Hang in there darling.
Jack you have to give yourself credit for all the times you've wanted to score and haven't. I pray my bloke will get to the point where he isn't chipping at all and it's his script and only his script.
respect
karen
respect
karen
Jack, I know what you mean about not telling anybody, coz the hold all the cards, and it seems that most of these places use more stick than carrot. They tell you it's a good idea to talk about it, but when you do, they mark your card. I'm pretty lucky really, that I'm not on a script anymore, so they've got nothing to take away from me as "punishment". And the mad thing is, that I don't really see many professionals at the moment, coz I've been doing so well, but I got a phone call from my shrink (or his secretary) on Friday, asking me if I wanted to come in on Monday to see him. That is unheard of. Normally I have to wait months for an appointment, and it's me nagging them to fit me in. It's really like divine intervention I think, coz I've got a lot of stuff to talk about, and with my drug worker, it's not so easy. I think with my level of psychiatric uckedupness, I need to talk to someone who is qualified to deal with it, coz a lot of time, I come out with stuff that to those not blessed with "a beautiful mind" (LMAO!!!)is completely incomprehensible. But I can't tell you how helpful it has been to have a good shrink, someone who I have come to trust over the years, and someone who I feel absolutely no self-consciousness about talking about "deep" stuff with. And the last thing my shrink said to me last time I saw him was that if I slip up, to tell him straight away. I was gonna just brush it under the carpet, but because of this unexpected appointment, I am going to tell him.
love
diff xxx
love
diff xxx
Jack, I had been asking about you on the PP board, I have missed ya.
I'm glad you aren't beating yourself up about it anymore. You try your hardest, you slip, you try try again.
You're a good guy. Don't feel ashamed to come back and talk. You are very wanted here.
love
stac
your poker buddy
I'm glad you aren't beating yourself up about it anymore. You try your hardest, you slip, you try try again.
You're a good guy. Don't feel ashamed to come back and talk. You are very wanted here.
love
stac
your poker buddy
Dear Diff,
Wow! That is divine interevention! I'm glad you've decided to talk to him about it. He can't help to the best of his ability if he doesn't know the whole truth.
Love,
Susan
Wow! That is divine interevention! I'm glad you've decided to talk to him about it. He can't help to the best of his ability if he doesn't know the whole truth.
Love,
Susan
Oh I have been MIA. Just busy not using I mean, and I missed this.
Hey, Jack I didn't know you were still beating yourself up. I look up to you, Jack.
Lapse not a relapse. I hear ya though on keeping it mum. That's all you would need is the clinic getting all over your stuff. It's O.K. Jack.
Mary is such a dear, and she is right, Jack as is all our dear ones here that you have helped so many of us. Hold your head up, and march on, Jack. We adore you, and I have complete faith in you. We all do.
Hey, heck sometimes you're the only one makes sense on here. LOL Well not counting out loved ones over there. They always make sense. Hope today finds you better, Jack.
Hey, Jack I didn't know you were still beating yourself up. I look up to you, Jack.
Lapse not a relapse. I hear ya though on keeping it mum. That's all you would need is the clinic getting all over your stuff. It's O.K. Jack.
Mary is such a dear, and she is right, Jack as is all our dear ones here that you have helped so many of us. Hold your head up, and march on, Jack. We adore you, and I have complete faith in you. We all do.
Hey, heck sometimes you're the only one makes sense on here. LOL Well not counting out loved ones over there. They always make sense. Hope today finds you better, Jack.
Hey Jack...glad ya back,
Not only are ya smart but as others have testified ya have a big Hartzz...but seriously.....on the 28th of April i hit the 19th year mark of being clean...makes me appear ancient age wise and i might have to start lying about how long i have been clean as one starts to fib about thier real age as they get older.....but it still will be a day at a time for me....as i only have today because who knows what tomorrow will bring..
love MARY
Not only are ya smart but as others have testified ya have a big Hartzz...but seriously.....on the 28th of April i hit the 19th year mark of being clean...makes me appear ancient age wise and i might have to start lying about how long i have been clean as one starts to fib about thier real age as they get older.....but it still will be a day at a time for me....as i only have today because who knows what tomorrow will bring..
love MARY
Dear Bryn,
That was beautifully said (your message to Jack)! You cracked me up on the "loved ones over there" statement. That was cute!
It was great to hear from you as always!
Love,
Susan
That was beautifully said (your message to Jack)! You cracked me up on the "loved ones over there" statement. That was cute!
It was great to hear from you as always!
Love,
Susan
Hey Jack, I'm so glad you are back.
Keep on keeping on. the meetings and a sponsor are a must.
Take care.
Karen
Keep on keeping on. the meetings and a sponsor are a must.
Take care.
Karen
Hey Jack,
You know what you need to do.
Go back to meetings AND GET A SPONSOR!
just ask yourself "What am I going to do differently this time?"
I know its hard to open up to someone about all the crazy s*** we've done,but sweetie, its not about saving your face, its about saving your a**.
Did you stop going to meetings,stop letting people know what was going on with you?
That is how our disease gets a foothold.
I'm glad you are sharing with people here, thats a good start.
We care about you so much-I'll be sending you good strong,positive sober energy.
Just take it one day at a time.
Carolyn
You know what you need to do.
Go back to meetings AND GET A SPONSOR!
just ask yourself "What am I going to do differently this time?"
I know its hard to open up to someone about all the crazy s*** we've done,but sweetie, its not about saving your face, its about saving your a**.
Did you stop going to meetings,stop letting people know what was going on with you?
That is how our disease gets a foothold.
I'm glad you are sharing with people here, thats a good start.
We care about you so much-I'll be sending you good strong,positive sober energy.
Just take it one day at a time.
Carolyn
OK Jack, where are you? Time to check in, atleast a hey, cya on the river,....SOMETHING!
Stac
Stac
Yeah come on Jack......come on, and talk at us....please.
Susan that was funny now that i read it again. You being perceptive knew I meant all you guys on Families/Loved Ones. Especially you, Susan.
Jack Of Heartz, please check in.
Susan that was funny now that i read it again. You being perceptive knew I meant all you guys on Families/Loved Ones. Especially you, Susan.
Jack Of Heartz, please check in.
