Good morning,
Well I did it finally, I went to my first clebrate recovery meeting last night, man oh man I cried and cried. Yesterday was a really bad day for me, my son never came and got his things from his room, so I packed it up, called him adn told him it was on the porch to come and get it. I hung up before he could lay a guilt trip on me.
So I made my first step, what is interesting is that this is a group to help me, myself and I, it is not AA/NA but it does work the 12 steps and is god based. They actually are working on step 11 now, but will start at 1 again in Feb, so this is time for me to get fimilar with it all.. I came to terms that things were not working my way and I had to let go and let god...I am happy and look forward to next week, My son will have to fall a few if not many times before he comes to terms that things happened for the best. No I didn't want him to leave but yes I did. I am saddened he was not willing to work on him and I right now, but then last night I learned it is me who I need to work on now. It will also be my helping hand thru my not drinking like I do...
I found I I was expecting to much from him, I can't ask anymore questions, if he wants to volunteer information to me it will have to come from him, I do know him well, and forsee not hearing from him for some time, but then thats ok now, I need time to work on me and get strong enough to not feed into the drama...
Thanks guys for letting me vent all along, I know it is going to better from this day forward..
Not only will I be able to work on the drinking thing, but my co-dependancy and enabling..I am looking forward to the better person I am going to become.
My prayers are with all that are suffering for one reason or another. Just keep praying and saying the Serenity prayer..
God grant me the serenity to accept
the things I can not change,
Courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know difference.
Krazi/Traci
Tracy, I'm glad to see you are coming to terms with what you need to do for yourself and what you need to do with your son. Tough love is a hard thing to do with your child but I have had to do it many times with my 21 year old daughter. She was living here with my granddaughter and was pregnant but wanted to do things her way. No matter what we said to her nothing worked. We finally decided tough love was the only way to go with her. I was hoping she would make the right decision to turn her life around but she didn't so we told her she had to move out of our house. It was the hardest thing I have ever had to do but I pray one day she will realize we did it for her and our grandchildren. You are doing the right thing. Shantel
Thank you hun,
Yes it is the hardest thing I have had to do even giving birth to him was easier...LOL
I KNOW for a fact he will look back and see it was for the best.
Krazi/Traci
Yes it is the hardest thing I have had to do even giving birth to him was easier...LOL
I KNOW for a fact he will look back and see it was for the best.
Krazi/Traci
