Hi,
Just wanted to say hi and wish you a nice day today. Things alot of times have a way of looking better in the day time, anyway, was just thinkin' of ya' and wanted to say hi.
Take care............Bob
LOL Bob we were posting to Lisa at the same time .....Lisa hope you know you are soo loved here...
love ya
gina :)
love ya
gina :)
As usual, you both (and Kat and soccermom) were right where I needed you to be last night. Thank you for talking me through what just doesn't seem that bad this morning.
You're right Bob, things do look better in the light of day. Night time has always been tough for me.
Love you all
Lisa
You're right Bob, things do look better in the light of day. Night time has always been tough for me.
Love you all
Lisa
Hi Cowgirl,
One of the things I've learned to do, at Gina's suggestion I might add, when I'm feeling down or sorry for myself about something, or I'm not getting what I want when I want it etc... I make a gratitude list. It always seems to turn out that I have more than I thought I did before I began writting it. Suddenly my problem/s
don't seem to be so bad after all. Knowing you a little, I know it's not something you can just schrug off and dismiss, but after making a list if you decide to try it,
it won't seem so tragic, and you'll realize it'll be a little easier to accept and get over then you originally thought it would be. And like I said, as sad as it is, you can be grateful you were able to enjoy and experience the things you did, and cherish what I'm sure are alot of wonderful memories through thought, pictures, and home movies, etc.. And always remember there are those that can only dream of experiencing doing what you've been so fortunate to have done. I love ya', and hope each day brings a little more sunshine and acceptance as you get through this. *wink*
Take care.............Bob
One of the things I've learned to do, at Gina's suggestion I might add, when I'm feeling down or sorry for myself about something, or I'm not getting what I want when I want it etc... I make a gratitude list. It always seems to turn out that I have more than I thought I did before I began writting it. Suddenly my problem/s
don't seem to be so bad after all. Knowing you a little, I know it's not something you can just schrug off and dismiss, but after making a list if you decide to try it,
it won't seem so tragic, and you'll realize it'll be a little easier to accept and get over then you originally thought it would be. And like I said, as sad as it is, you can be grateful you were able to enjoy and experience the things you did, and cherish what I'm sure are alot of wonderful memories through thought, pictures, and home movies, etc.. And always remember there are those that can only dream of experiencing doing what you've been so fortunate to have done. I love ya', and hope each day brings a little more sunshine and acceptance as you get through this. *wink*
Take care.............Bob
Bob... no truer words ever spoken... once the sun rises everything takes on a whole new light, literally.
I am beginning to think all addicts suffer from anxiety to some degree. It is 4 am and I cant sleep. Before and during my addiction I would be pacing the house, thinking awful thoughts, feeling so lonely (abandoned really). I would literally count the minutes until the sun would rise and I could turn all of the landscaping lights off. That is when I knew I made it. That was my life at 4 mils of xanax a day.
Now, mind you, I dont love being up at 4 am. I still feel somewhat lonely, I am still waiting on the sun to come kiss me, I still have a few bad thoughts that consume me. But, I am clean and I dont have to worry about the hell of withdrawal. I have lonely times, having one right now. But I had them while using too. Remembering that helps keep me clean. Happiness does not come in the form of a pill.
I am beginning to think all addicts suffer from anxiety to some degree. It is 4 am and I cant sleep. Before and during my addiction I would be pacing the house, thinking awful thoughts, feeling so lonely (abandoned really). I would literally count the minutes until the sun would rise and I could turn all of the landscaping lights off. That is when I knew I made it. That was my life at 4 mils of xanax a day.
Now, mind you, I dont love being up at 4 am. I still feel somewhat lonely, I am still waiting on the sun to come kiss me, I still have a few bad thoughts that consume me. But, I am clean and I dont have to worry about the hell of withdrawal. I have lonely times, having one right now. But I had them while using too. Remembering that helps keep me clean. Happiness does not come in the form of a pill.
Alcoholism (addiction) is a disease whose symptoms are "restlessness, irritabliity, and discontent."
Dr. William D. Silkworth
"The Doctor's Opinion"
Alcoholics Anonymous (Big Book)
1935
Bob:
If you would, direct us to passages concerning jealousy, hatred, and judgement of others. I believe we could all benefit from that. Seems to be somewhat of a problem around here from time to time. The more we know the further we'll go!
If you would, direct us to passages concerning jealousy, hatred, and judgement of others. I believe we could all benefit from that. Seems to be somewhat of a problem around here from time to time. The more we know the further we'll go!
Hi Mrs-U,
Sorry I didn't see your post here till just now. And quickly wanna say hello to Bob B. I enjoy reading some of your posts, thanks for being here, I haven't yet told you but, a few of your posts have helped me, just wanted to tell ya.
Lonelyness; It took some work but as i grow in recovery, and compare myself to myself, I'm enjoying the "Alone Time" I get now and then, my own company
if you will. I used to hate being alone, and I always felt lonely. I could be in a bar full of people drinking and having a blast, or somewhere in a room full of people
high having fun, and yet in a room full of people feel so alone. Today, I may be alone sometimes, but I'm not lonely. Sometimes in a crowd today if I'm alone, I can sometimes pick out the folks that are appearing to be having fun, but I can tell they are lonely. As I work on myself today, and get more comfratable with me and who I am, and feel more secure with the people around me that say they love me, I'm able to believe them today, and as I get better with letting others in, and allowing others to get to know me, that feeling of lonelyness doesn't exist for me today. I might be alone sometimes in a crowd today, by myself, and although I'm alone, I'm no longer lonely. I hope that made sence, but it took alot of working on me to get there. Today I understand the meaning of
the saying; "Beyond My Wildest Dreams". This is just one of the things I've worked on since getting clean and sober. Like I've said before, for me, recovery is so much more than just not picking up. Today I hold my head high, I no longer walk around with my head down feeling worthless or shameful in anyway.
I still have a ways to go, but comparing myself to myself, I see a change for the better, after all, it's all about change. Just by working the program as suggested,
we can't help but change, even if it's in spite of ourselves, but it does happen faster if you want it and chase it, today I chase recovery like I used to chase
that first damn high, which turned out to be me chasing something that didn't exist. Hope this helped and made some sence.
Take care............Bob
Sorry I didn't see your post here till just now. And quickly wanna say hello to Bob B. I enjoy reading some of your posts, thanks for being here, I haven't yet told you but, a few of your posts have helped me, just wanted to tell ya.
Lonelyness; It took some work but as i grow in recovery, and compare myself to myself, I'm enjoying the "Alone Time" I get now and then, my own company
if you will. I used to hate being alone, and I always felt lonely. I could be in a bar full of people drinking and having a blast, or somewhere in a room full of people
high having fun, and yet in a room full of people feel so alone. Today, I may be alone sometimes, but I'm not lonely. Sometimes in a crowd today if I'm alone, I can sometimes pick out the folks that are appearing to be having fun, but I can tell they are lonely. As I work on myself today, and get more comfratable with me and who I am, and feel more secure with the people around me that say they love me, I'm able to believe them today, and as I get better with letting others in, and allowing others to get to know me, that feeling of lonelyness doesn't exist for me today. I might be alone sometimes in a crowd today, by myself, and although I'm alone, I'm no longer lonely. I hope that made sence, but it took alot of working on me to get there. Today I understand the meaning of
the saying; "Beyond My Wildest Dreams". This is just one of the things I've worked on since getting clean and sober. Like I've said before, for me, recovery is so much more than just not picking up. Today I hold my head high, I no longer walk around with my head down feeling worthless or shameful in anyway.
I still have a ways to go, but comparing myself to myself, I see a change for the better, after all, it's all about change. Just by working the program as suggested,
we can't help but change, even if it's in spite of ourselves, but it does happen faster if you want it and chase it, today I chase recovery like I used to chase
that first damn high, which turned out to be me chasing something that didn't exist. Hope this helped and made some sence.
Take care............Bob
Bob:
Thank you for making me feel wanted and needed. It means alot to me... considering.
Not only is it nice for me to hear but nice for others to hear to as I have been told to go away because I have no place here.
Thank you for making me feel wanted and needed. It means alot to me... considering.
Not only is it nice for me to hear but nice for others to hear to as I have been told to go away because I have no place here.
