Hi,
Mitzy I think you should stay. I've left 100 tmes. It doesn't matter what anyone thinks. It's pitty pot bulls--t. I post for me. If it helps someone else thats a plus.
I'm sick of worrying about who does or dowsn't like what I have to say and I'm not gonna worry about it any more.
danny,
Sammy is a big girl, and has good sobriety and if she doesn't wanna post so what.
Heres what I think, I read your post in the other thread, why don't you talk like that to your wife! Get off your pitty pot and do something about your own life. I'd love to see you do good, but nothing changes if nothing changes. Get clean, work it out or leave your wife and quit whining!
I'm not trying to start any s--t, but Jesus, if some people here put as much effort in talking about recovery as they do with the poor me posting or the pat on the back I love you posts, maybe the people that you wanna see post more would!
Just my opinion,
Take care.......................................God bless.......................................Bob
Hiya Bob hows things ???????? jackie xx
hey Bob and all,
recovery is all that matters, i for one got clean to save my life and that is what it is all about.......bottom line.....
heres todays thought.......
Today's Thought
MONDAY , JANUARY 03, 2005
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Nurturing Self Care
.. .there isn't a guidebook for setting boundaries. Each of us has our own guide inside ourselves. If we continue to work at recovery, our boundaries will develop. They will get healthy and sensitive. Our selves will tell us what we need to know,' and we'll love ourselves enough to listen.
--Beyond Codependency
What do we need to do to take care of ourselves?
Listen to that voice inside. What makes you angry? What have you had enough of? What don't you trust? What doesn't feel right? What can't you stand? What makes you uncomfortable? What do you want? Need? What don't you want and need? What do you like? What would feel good?
In recovery, we learn that self care leads us on the path to God's will and plan for our life. Self-care never leads away from our highest good; it leads toward it.
Learn to nurture that voice inside. We can trust ourselves. We can take care of ourselves. We are wiser than we think. Our guide is within, ever present. Listen to, trust, and nurture that guide.
Today, I will affirm that lama gift to the Universe and myself. I will remember that nurturing self care delivers that gift in its highest form.
recovery is all that matters, i for one got clean to save my life and that is what it is all about.......bottom line.....
heres todays thought.......
Today's Thought
MONDAY , JANUARY 03, 2005
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Nurturing Self Care
.. .there isn't a guidebook for setting boundaries. Each of us has our own guide inside ourselves. If we continue to work at recovery, our boundaries will develop. They will get healthy and sensitive. Our selves will tell us what we need to know,' and we'll love ourselves enough to listen.
--Beyond Codependency
What do we need to do to take care of ourselves?
Listen to that voice inside. What makes you angry? What have you had enough of? What don't you trust? What doesn't feel right? What can't you stand? What makes you uncomfortable? What do you want? Need? What don't you want and need? What do you like? What would feel good?
In recovery, we learn that self care leads us on the path to God's will and plan for our life. Self-care never leads away from our highest good; it leads toward it.
Learn to nurture that voice inside. We can trust ourselves. We can take care of ourselves. We are wiser than we think. Our guide is within, ever present. Listen to, trust, and nurture that guide.
Today, I will affirm that lama gift to the Universe and myself. I will remember that nurturing self care delivers that gift in its highest form.
Thanks Bob that was very sweet of you to post! it made me feel good......
your right about the pitty potty, i must of been on it, hehe.......but i am off know & wanting to get back on track! take care Bob....................
your right about the pitty potty, i must of been on it, hehe.......but i am off know & wanting to get back on track! take care Bob....................
Edited
Gina,
Great post love ya', how ever anyone chooses to do it, it's all about change.
Get clean and or sober, if thats what anyone wants, than do it! Lets do it together, recovery is great.
Jacky,
Hi, how are ya'? I'm good, fell good, a little tired today but good. Went to a few great meetings this week. I would love to talk about recovery here too. But it's almost impossible with all the petty bs that goes on. So, I'm just gonna do it anyway. If anyone wants to jump in great, if not, thats not my problem. Love ya',
it's nice to see ya'.
Take care.....................................God bless........................................Bob
Great post love ya', how ever anyone chooses to do it, it's all about change.
Get clean and or sober, if thats what anyone wants, than do it! Lets do it together, recovery is great.
Jacky,
Hi, how are ya'? I'm good, fell good, a little tired today but good. Went to a few great meetings this week. I would love to talk about recovery here too. But it's almost impossible with all the petty bs that goes on. So, I'm just gonna do it anyway. If anyone wants to jump in great, if not, thats not my problem. Love ya',
it's nice to see ya'.
Take care.....................................God bless........................................Bob
Bob i do hope the new year brings you and gina the love and luck you both deserve as do we all. like i said in my other thread life is just a blip one day here then gone im just trying to make the most of each day in my recovery being the best possible human being i can be well with a few flaws lol jackie xxx
Hi Jacky,
Happy New Year to you. I hope your year brings you peace and good fortune too. I hope everyone has a good year and has the willingness to do what ever it takes to achieve recovery. Praying to God or the Higher Power of someones choice and asking for help is great. As long as we all remember it's up to us to do the foot work necessary to achieve that goal.
Take care...................................God bless..........................................Bob
Happy New Year to you. I hope your year brings you peace and good fortune too. I hope everyone has a good year and has the willingness to do what ever it takes to achieve recovery. Praying to God or the Higher Power of someones choice and asking for help is great. As long as we all remember it's up to us to do the foot work necessary to achieve that goal.
Take care...................................God bless..........................................Bob
Hey Bob,
I don't know you but seems to me like you are being a little harsh on Danny. He was just concerned about Sammy leaving, as ALL of us are. She has her sobriety yes but she will be missed. I am glad Danny acknowledged she was no longer with us because she is missed, As far as Danny and his wife goes, I agree in the sense that Danny does need to defend himself as I have said that to him on numerous times. However, he is no different than a woman that is in an abusive relationship. Sometimes it's harder to leave when you are caught up in an abusive cycle. They have children involved. Danny is staying at home with his children and is not working right now. Yes it is easy for us all to sit back and say get out, get out but sometimes it takes time to set up a plan and go with it. Some people take longer than others. Danny is a great guy, he knows right from wrong. I believe he is fully aware of what he needs to do in his life and if he is making a mistake by staying then hey, he's human. I will be there for him when and if he decided to leave. Just my thought. Rae
I don't know you but seems to me like you are being a little harsh on Danny. He was just concerned about Sammy leaving, as ALL of us are. She has her sobriety yes but she will be missed. I am glad Danny acknowledged she was no longer with us because she is missed, As far as Danny and his wife goes, I agree in the sense that Danny does need to defend himself as I have said that to him on numerous times. However, he is no different than a woman that is in an abusive relationship. Sometimes it's harder to leave when you are caught up in an abusive cycle. They have children involved. Danny is staying at home with his children and is not working right now. Yes it is easy for us all to sit back and say get out, get out but sometimes it takes time to set up a plan and go with it. Some people take longer than others. Danny is a great guy, he knows right from wrong. I believe he is fully aware of what he needs to do in his life and if he is making a mistake by staying then hey, he's human. I will be there for him when and if he decided to leave. Just my thought. Rae
Reflections for Beginners
from
'Hour To Hour - The First 30 Days'
- by Shelly Marshall
the author of 'Day By Day' & other Meditation Books
In the beginning of recovery we usually don't like ourselves very well. Consequently, we usually don't like others too well either. But we can grant others this: the right to be human, the right to be wrong, and the right to be right!
When people really bug me, let me let them be.
from
'Hour To Hour - The First 30 Days'
- by Shelly Marshall
the author of 'Day By Day' & other Meditation Books
In the beginning of recovery we usually don't like ourselves very well. Consequently, we usually don't like others too well either. But we can grant others this: the right to be human, the right to be wrong, and the right to be right!
When people really bug me, let me let them be.
Rae,
I agree and didn't post to sound mean. But sammy's not posting has been addressed and sammy is clean and sober. I'm only saying to danny what anyone at a meeting would say. I've also been told at times point blank, Get off your pitty pot, if your situation is bad then change it. I know it's easier for me to say it then for danny to do it, I'm just trying to do help. I don't think it's helping to say to someone,....aww, it'll be ok I love you......Although thats nice and I do love everyone, I think it's more helpful to say whats needed than to feed into it.
I think your post to me Rae was great and I do understand what your saying. I just wanna try and get recovery talk happening here, and I think whats going on in danny's life is blocking his progress and only he can change it. I would love to see him someday post and say, he's doing great, has some time under his belt etc.. etc.. I remember my sponsor telling me when I got clean and sober,
strap in, recovery is a hell of a ride, some things will get worse before they get better and in the beginning the ups and downs are stressfull sometimes but it can be done and it's all worth it. Things worth getting are worth waiting for and working for.
Take care.......................................God bless.....................................Bob
I agree and didn't post to sound mean. But sammy's not posting has been addressed and sammy is clean and sober. I'm only saying to danny what anyone at a meeting would say. I've also been told at times point blank, Get off your pitty pot, if your situation is bad then change it. I know it's easier for me to say it then for danny to do it, I'm just trying to do help. I don't think it's helping to say to someone,....aww, it'll be ok I love you......Although thats nice and I do love everyone, I think it's more helpful to say whats needed than to feed into it.
I think your post to me Rae was great and I do understand what your saying. I just wanna try and get recovery talk happening here, and I think whats going on in danny's life is blocking his progress and only he can change it. I would love to see him someday post and say, he's doing great, has some time under his belt etc.. etc.. I remember my sponsor telling me when I got clean and sober,
strap in, recovery is a hell of a ride, some things will get worse before they get better and in the beginning the ups and downs are stressfull sometimes but it can be done and it's all worth it. Things worth getting are worth waiting for and working for.
Take care.......................................God bless.....................................Bob
Daily quote from 'The Pocket Sponsor'
'24/7 Back to the Basics' - Support for Addiction Recovery
- by Shelly Marshall
the author of 'Day By Day', 'Hour to Hour' & other Meditation Books
When we pray for strength, the Universe gives us difficulties to make us strong. When we pray for courage, the Universe gives us danger to overcome. When we pray for patience, the Universe gives us long lines and traffic jams. What are you praying for?
I may ask for favors but the Universe gives me opportunities.
'24/7 Back to the Basics' - Support for Addiction Recovery
- by Shelly Marshall
the author of 'Day By Day', 'Hour to Hour' & other Meditation Books
When we pray for strength, the Universe gives us difficulties to make us strong. When we pray for courage, the Universe gives us danger to overcome. When we pray for patience, the Universe gives us long lines and traffic jams. What are you praying for?
I may ask for favors but the Universe gives me opportunities.
Well that was nicely put. I agree. Sometimes we do need to stop feeling sorry for ourselves, me included and do something about it. Your right about that. I was really just hoping Danny didn't read what you wrote and take offense to it and feel worse than he already does about his situation. I now see you were only trying to help and I understnd where you are coming from. Danny if your reading this we all love you and think you deserve better. You have put your time in here trying to help others overcome their addictions and now you do need to put some efferot into you. I think your a great guy and any woman would be happy to have your in their life. To bad your wife is the way she is but you can't change that. You can however, change your situtation and maybe oneday you will. I wish you all the best, Rae
Hi everyone
I understand completely that Bob had good intentions with his post about Danny and Jasmine/Mitzy but I cringed a little when I read it because I was worried about how Danny would take it. Jasmine/Mitzy has the personality for that to do her a world of good. And Danny, if he wasn't so wounded, would have been able to bounce back like she did, but he's hurting really bad right now. One thing that is bad about this form of communication is that you can't see the person to know how they are really doing. I know myself that if someone uses the tough love thing on me when I'm doing ok, I can accept it and maybe joke about it and let it sink in. But if I'm hurting or upset when someone uses tough love on me, even though it might still do me some good, it hurts deeply at the same time. I know I personally tend to be too nurturing and sympathetic that I don't help. The bottom line is that we ALL do our best. We ALL have good intentions. We ALL want to help each other. We ALL bring our special gifts to this board. And NONE of us is PERFECT. That's what's wonderful about the board! If we were perfect, there would be no need for this board. lol
I want to personally apologize if people got upset about my posts. I thought we were SUPPOSED to share what was going on in our lives so that people could understand and help us deal with all of that in helping each other (and our loved ones) stay or get sober. If I was wrong, please let me know.
Love,
Susan
I understand completely that Bob had good intentions with his post about Danny and Jasmine/Mitzy but I cringed a little when I read it because I was worried about how Danny would take it. Jasmine/Mitzy has the personality for that to do her a world of good. And Danny, if he wasn't so wounded, would have been able to bounce back like she did, but he's hurting really bad right now. One thing that is bad about this form of communication is that you can't see the person to know how they are really doing. I know myself that if someone uses the tough love thing on me when I'm doing ok, I can accept it and maybe joke about it and let it sink in. But if I'm hurting or upset when someone uses tough love on me, even though it might still do me some good, it hurts deeply at the same time. I know I personally tend to be too nurturing and sympathetic that I don't help. The bottom line is that we ALL do our best. We ALL have good intentions. We ALL want to help each other. We ALL bring our special gifts to this board. And NONE of us is PERFECT. That's what's wonderful about the board! If we were perfect, there would be no need for this board. lol
I want to personally apologize if people got upset about my posts. I thought we were SUPPOSED to share what was going on in our lives so that people could understand and help us deal with all of that in helping each other (and our loved ones) stay or get sober. If I was wrong, please let me know.
Love,
Susan
Hi Susan! yeah i have to aggree 100% with what you said about me being able to handle it, but dannys hurting bad and is very fragile at this time, i see all sides....hes not comming back and that sucks! he is a great guy!!! but we all have to remember what we are all doing here, right?, right! one new person read the threads and was outta here, damm that sucks!! maybe danny will reconsider after things get better in his life?? i sure hope so! danny your a great person & i wish that u would come back, if not i understand my friend......we will keep in touch......anyways good to hear from you all, take care.........
This board is not an AA or an NA meeting.
Even if it was, the Big Book talks a lot about service work and does not mention tough love as a way to work with those who are still out. The Big Book does not instruct AAers to accuse others of being on a pity pot. Just ask Bob to prove me wrong by showing where it says that these methods are suggested in AA literature. That should keep him confused for a couple of weeks. Sometimes newcomers have sponsors that use tough love. That is OK, I guess, because a newcomer can always fire a sponsor if the sponsor does not have what he wants.
Here is some tough love for the !2 step goon squad. Only idiots and a**h*les use tough love in an open meeting, and it is ridiculous to think that tough love belongs on a board that is not AA or NA affiliated.
There are some good and decent people that go to AA. Many of them do not try to shove it down your throat, and many of them really do have a lot to offer. Most of the ones that have what I want have left this board. I wonder why? It is always the same 12 Step goon squad behind this stuff.
If any of you ever decide to give AA a chance, please remember that what you see here does not represent AA and it does not represent the 12 steps. There are a**h*les and idiots everywhere, including on this board, and AA is no exception. Please do not throw the baby out with the bathwater.
Even if it was, the Big Book talks a lot about service work and does not mention tough love as a way to work with those who are still out. The Big Book does not instruct AAers to accuse others of being on a pity pot. Just ask Bob to prove me wrong by showing where it says that these methods are suggested in AA literature. That should keep him confused for a couple of weeks. Sometimes newcomers have sponsors that use tough love. That is OK, I guess, because a newcomer can always fire a sponsor if the sponsor does not have what he wants.
Here is some tough love for the !2 step goon squad. Only idiots and a**h*les use tough love in an open meeting, and it is ridiculous to think that tough love belongs on a board that is not AA or NA affiliated.
There are some good and decent people that go to AA. Many of them do not try to shove it down your throat, and many of them really do have a lot to offer. Most of the ones that have what I want have left this board. I wonder why? It is always the same 12 Step goon squad behind this stuff.
If any of you ever decide to give AA a chance, please remember that what you see here does not represent AA and it does not represent the 12 steps. There are a**h*les and idiots everywhere, including on this board, and AA is no exception. Please do not throw the baby out with the bathwater.
Nice Ebby. I like your picture. It looks like me.
Thank you Ebby- Hey Eddie, did you see my photo?
I didn't read where Bob was quoting the big book about the pity pot, that's just standard AA stuff that is said in most meetings, nation wide. I've heard it in our meetings too and we're across the country.
Guys, Sammy is just fine..she's taking a little break is all.
Cowgirl
Guys, Sammy is just fine..she's taking a little break is all.
Cowgirl
Bob, maybe ur intentions r good, but mixing these issues together confuses me. what the f..k does the fact that Sammy is clean & sober have to do with Dannys genuine concern about her not posting & his relationship with his future ex-wife. All issues are not related & its not true that if he spent as much time doing whatever, blah , blah , blah.
I've never been in an abusive relationship as an adult, but from what i understand its not as easy as just say no.
U say it's in love, but i don't feel it.
I've never been in an abusive relationship as an adult, but from what i understand its not as easy as just say no.
U say it's in love, but i don't feel it.
