I have a daughter 28 who i just found out is taking pain pills, crushing them up and snorting them..my younger daughter saw her at a party the other nite wrecked out of her mind doing the pills and drinking..she told my younger daughter not to tell us and that she is done with drinking and pills and will take care of this herself...what do i do...thanks
Not much you can do, she is an adult...
You can love her as is, allow her to find her way ... now that you know, well you know, although I am not sure what you know...If she is doing her thing, working, taking care of herself let it go...if she is slacking, needing cash, needing you to fix her mistakes and making lots of excuses as to why she can't meet her responsibilities...well more is going on and you must read on enabling, on how it hurts the one addicted and keeps them trapped in their addiction...really why stop when someone is following you around cleaning up your mess, paying your bills, smoothing over your latest crazy episode with family friends...
There is a family board you might want to visit there and read some posts...
You can love her as is, allow her to find her way ... now that you know, well you know, although I am not sure what you know...If she is doing her thing, working, taking care of herself let it go...if she is slacking, needing cash, needing you to fix her mistakes and making lots of excuses as to why she can't meet her responsibilities...well more is going on and you must read on enabling, on how it hurts the one addicted and keeps them trapped in their addiction...really why stop when someone is following you around cleaning up your mess, paying your bills, smoothing over your latest crazy episode with family friends...
There is a family board you might want to visit there and read some posts...
Hi, as a mother myself I realy feel for you. It must be truly dreadful to see your daughter ruining her life like this. I myself am an addict and live very much from day to day, facing whatever crisis with a couple of pills. Your daughter is very young and in all probility feels that she can control this need for drugs. Young people don't feel their mortality and think they'll go on forever. Talking to her she will think that you are trying to control her, perhaps a close friend, minister, someone with some life experience, who will encourage her to seek help, perhaps narcotics anonmyous or some other outlet. Knowing children they do not take kindly to advice from family. There embarassed by family enquiries and perhaps feel their been watched. One of the big things about addiction is secrecy, I know your daughter was doing this at a party but she was with her peers, in the normal course of events addicts love secrecy, hugging their secret like some love that no one else knows. I hope this helps, get in touch if you need to, I'm always here. Agnes
