I won't start a new thread every day... but for now It is helping me to write about how I am feeling with it all.
Last night I did almost cave. I laid in bed stairing at the ceiling till 4:30 am. My friend left a half a joint in my ashtray on new years eve and I kept it.. Last night I got out of bed and went looking for it... I found it... I prepared myself to give up and smoke it... but i didn't... thank god I had the strength to throw it away..
I know they say marijuana isn't "physically addictive", but my own withdrawel symptoms are very physical. My palms are always wet with sweat, I break into cold sweats, and I know Its only day 2 but I am having mood swings
My girlfriend is going to come over to spend some time with me today, I don't want to snap at her for something out of her controll.. We've been togeither for over 6 years and she knows me better then anyone else in the world.. but she doesnt understand my addiction.. she smokes when she is with me, and when she go's home to her family she is fine without it..
In the past it seemeduitting was the easy part. It was getting myself to the point where I was ready to quit that was really tough. This is tough
Still Straight (but struggling) Mr.B
Post as much as you want, man having a joint around and not smoking, pat yourself on the back, that would be so hard at day 2, hell at day 270ish that would be hard.
I remember flushing the last of my bag and watching those pretty green little bits scatter into the watter and swirl around and go down down, oh it brings a tear to my eye today. the feeling of panic i had afterwards. but.. the sense of accomplishment at the same time, was great and the pats on the back i got from the board were great.
so here is to you, get rid of everything that reminds you and tempts you and replace it with healthy positive things. and to hell with anyone who says it isnt physically addictive, they havent lived thru what we have.
I remember flushing the last of my bag and watching those pretty green little bits scatter into the watter and swirl around and go down down, oh it brings a tear to my eye today. the feeling of panic i had afterwards. but.. the sense of accomplishment at the same time, was great and the pats on the back i got from the board were great.
so here is to you, get rid of everything that reminds you and tempts you and replace it with healthy positive things. and to hell with anyone who says it isnt physically addictive, they havent lived thru what we have.
My girlfriend is here now. She wants to support me as much as posible.... The truth is. I just wish she'd go over to my brothers, smoke a joint, be happy and don't worry about me. I am the one with the problem.... I feel like s*** but she doesn't have too.
So I took her over there, and discretely got up and left. I know they are smoking a big fatty now and I kind of hope they are. She won't smoke around me and for that I am gratefull. I am the one with the problem.
I've been going over scenarios in my mind for weeks now... People ARE gonna smoke right infront of me and I HAVE to be ready for it. Every day I will smell it and see it in my living room, in the ash trays, and all around me. I am strong tho. I am doing this for me. Its hard
The depression I knew I would experience is creeping into my thoughts. I feel like I would like to just cry and I don't know why. I don't feel good about myself yet. Its been a while since I've done anything good.
I have more to say but I got to go for now. To be contiunued
So I took her over there, and discretely got up and left. I know they are smoking a big fatty now and I kind of hope they are. She won't smoke around me and for that I am gratefull. I am the one with the problem.
I've been going over scenarios in my mind for weeks now... People ARE gonna smoke right infront of me and I HAVE to be ready for it. Every day I will smell it and see it in my living room, in the ash trays, and all around me. I am strong tho. I am doing this for me. Its hard
The depression I knew I would experience is creeping into my thoughts. I feel like I would like to just cry and I don't know why. I don't feel good about myself yet. Its been a while since I've done anything good.
I have more to say but I got to go for now. To be contiunued
hope you can take a joke but...
>My girlfriend is going to come over to spend some time with me today,
- over on overgrow.com they said to get off pot, have sex everyday. at 19 yrs marriage i can't get away with that "theory" but you might.
yes, sometimes is seems all the "cool" people smoke, like my neighbor who keeps coming over to "see how I am". but no way, not me.
>My girlfriend is going to come over to spend some time with me today,
- over on overgrow.com they said to get off pot, have sex everyday. at 19 yrs marriage i can't get away with that "theory" but you might.
yes, sometimes is seems all the "cool" people smoke, like my neighbor who keeps coming over to "see how I am". but no way, not me.
lol @ hardcharger.
Yes I can take a joke :)
Cheers!
Yes I can take a joke :)
Cheers!
