This is my 86th day sober. I was having some hard times but I have to say that things are getting better. I lost my girlfriend and that really made me want to use, it has been almost 2 weeks now and I am getting through that one. She may not love me anymore, but there are a lot of people who do and care about me a lot. I have a certain friend who is traveling down the same path of alcoholism that I did, I know that she needs help, but she isn't ready to get any yet. I know that I can't be there to help if I don't stay sober. For that friend and all the rest of them. I want to help everyone I can, but I know that I can't help if I can't help myself first. I am doing good, I could be better, but not if I am drinking and drugging.
Wow! That's awsome;) You are sounding so much better! I'm very happy for you and proud of you! Keep on keepin' on :)
Congradulations LL, You are showing such strength during this rough time!! What are the tools you have used during this time? I could use some more tips!!
Big Big Hugs
lovedove
Big Big Hugs
lovedove
Prayer is the best thing. Pray in the morning to stay sober and pray at bedtime, thanking him for your sobriety. I can't give too many suggestions since I do a lot of stuff that I shouldn't, but I obstain from picking up. I work at a bar/restaurant, I have been to a baseball game, a country festival (where beer is normal), I have gone to bars to hang out and I just have the power of my higher power on my side so far. As soon as I make him mad, I will probably slip. but until then, I will keep on keeping on. Oh yeah, meetings help out. Listening and sharing. But God and Fear are my two biggest factors.
LL....SOUNDS LIKE YOUR DOING REALY GOOD NOW....GLAD THAT THINGS HAVE GOTTEN BETTER FOR YOU!!!
MY PIECE OF ADVISE....JUST MY TWO CENTS.....DONT TRY TO PUSH YOUR "friend" INTO GETTING SOBER BEFORE SHE IS READY, IT ONLY WOULD LEAD TO RELAPS FOR HER. LET HER MAKE HER CALL WHEN SHE HITS HER BOTTOM.
WORRY ABOUT YOU AND THE THINGS THAT YOU HAVE TO DO TO STAY CLEAN.
BY THE WAY...ANY LUCK ON THE COURT STUFF???
HavinItHard
MY PIECE OF ADVISE....JUST MY TWO CENTS.....DONT TRY TO PUSH YOUR "friend" INTO GETTING SOBER BEFORE SHE IS READY, IT ONLY WOULD LEAD TO RELAPS FOR HER. LET HER MAKE HER CALL WHEN SHE HITS HER BOTTOM.
WORRY ABOUT YOU AND THE THINGS THAT YOU HAVE TO DO TO STAY CLEAN.
BY THE WAY...ANY LUCK ON THE COURT STUFF???
HavinItHard
I don't think you will every make your Higher Power mad, your HP hasn't brought you this far to drop you on your head! My Higher Power has unconditional love for me...thank goodness...way to go on 86 days! I hope your fear is of the healthy sort...I've been told fear is just the opposite of faith.
VWGIRL, do you think that its possible to have a relationship early in recovery?? Sorry if im jumping ahead, but im curious what the out come of an early relationship would cause someone thats in early recovery.!!
How ya doing by the way???
HavinItHard
How ya doing by the way???
HavinItHard
havinithard,
I know that the only thing I can do for my friend right now is to pray and to lead by example.
I have been feeling better but my ex-girlfriend is making me feel like s**t. I wish she would be honest with me. And the court stuff is going, but there is more to it than anyone knows. Someone should try to talk to me about it.
LL
I know that the only thing I can do for my friend right now is to pray and to lead by example.
I have been feeling better but my ex-girlfriend is making me feel like s**t. I wish she would be honest with me. And the court stuff is going, but there is more to it than anyone knows. Someone should try to talk to me about it.
LL
IM HERE....IF YOU WANT TO WRITE....What could be so bad that you dont want to tell anyone?? We all have our problems...was this cause of your addiction??? Something that happened while you were out useing, drinking?? Or something that happened before, or after your treatment??
LIKE I SAID...YOU WANT TO WRITE...I HAVE A FEW HOURS!!!!
keep it comein.
HavinItHard
LIKE I SAID...YOU WANT TO WRITE...I HAVE A FEW HOURS!!!!
keep it comein.
HavinItHard
Likesithard,
I am still here, Tiger's don't play til 7:10
I am still here, Tiger's don't play til 7:10
I just want to see my ex-girlfriend. Not 4 long or anything. It has been almost 2 weeks since I saw her and I am alright with not "being with her" but I still want her to be my friend. Part of my life if you will.
"LIKES"IT HARD???????????????
YOU GOT THE WRONG NAME THERE LL.....Its HAVINITHARD!!!
But everyone makes mistakes. So what you need to talk about???
Oh, by the way....What got ya likeing the Detroit Tigers??? thats one team i would never have guessed had FANS!!! LMAO!!!!
HavinItHard
YOU GOT THE WRONG NAME THERE LL.....Its HAVINITHARD!!!
But everyone makes mistakes. So what you need to talk about???
Oh, by the way....What got ya likeing the Detroit Tigers??? thats one team i would never have guessed had FANS!!! LMAO!!!!
HavinItHard
I think my ex-gf is purposly trying to hurt me right now. Something she swore she would never do. She can't talk to me, she has to write me, and text me, oh wait, that even stopped.
My avoiding court has to do with the insurance. My car was insured by my parents. I am sure that liability doesn't cover drunk drivers.
It was suggested to me that within the first year of recovery that I not engage in a relationship, but I did, I just thought it would be a one night stand actually..but at four months sobriety I started dating a guy on the Program and it is still working out well over two years later. He knows my Program and my God come first and foremost, my family, my job and then him. I understand his priorities as well. We do not live together and that is a good thing because I am learning to be alone by myself and to really get to know myself. He is so very special to me; it is really nice to have a genuinely nice guy in my life. Oh, btw, I never went to rehab or treatment and I don't blame anyone else for my alcoholism or addiction, use to, not anymore...I now know I am predisposed to this affliction and it is in remission by the action I take on a daily basis with the Program I work.
Will the accident victim be able to sue my parents after I am convicted? I am not worried about what happens to me. I have lost everything else, only gained sobriety. I am scared that I am going to lose my family too if they lose everything they have worked their entire lives for because of my dumb a**. I know that wheather or not she wants to admit it, my gf had issues with my issues and she didn't want to deal with it anymore. Maybe if I cleared them up things could be better with us. I know that I need to put all that court s*** behind me, even if it means doing time. Before I knew that she would come visit me, now I feel alone. Especially if the thing about my family is true.
LL....No i dont think that she is trying to hurt you....although i dont know her..what you said about her in your early posts, it sounds like she might be trying to do the right thing with her life, but just cant get it in a relationship.
Has she told you that she wasnt READY???? Has she told you that maybe its her and not you???
Im not to sure what kind of things that happened to the two of you, but i do know that its not always GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE!!!!
Just getting out of a relationship myself...it was vey hard to break up with this person, and like you i met this person in treatment too. Things were great for a few but then it got realy bad in the end. This person was a different person everyday, and i got sick of stressing over them.
Its great getting to a point where your talking with old friends and haveing good conversations, its a good thing to be out and about getting done what you need to get done on a daily basis. Be glad that she isnt there to bring ya down.
Relationships suck....but when life gets you down, and it will, its only bad if you let it keep ya down. Just my two pennys worth for ya.
By the way.....Tigers Stink.....betcha that they loose the game tonight!!!!
Has she told you that she wasnt READY???? Has she told you that maybe its her and not you???
Im not to sure what kind of things that happened to the two of you, but i do know that its not always GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE!!!!
Just getting out of a relationship myself...it was vey hard to break up with this person, and like you i met this person in treatment too. Things were great for a few but then it got realy bad in the end. This person was a different person everyday, and i got sick of stressing over them.
Its great getting to a point where your talking with old friends and haveing good conversations, its a good thing to be out and about getting done what you need to get done on a daily basis. Be glad that she isnt there to bring ya down.
Relationships suck....but when life gets you down, and it will, its only bad if you let it keep ya down. Just my two pennys worth for ya.
By the way.....Tigers Stink.....betcha that they loose the game tonight!!!!
THanks VWGirl for that intelligent post. I thought that I could be in a relationship early in recovery. It felt so right and we were so in love. Instantly she fell out of love and she can never find time to see me. Doesn't that sound suspcious? And that is what she found that she hated about me, my suspcious mind. I asked "too many questions." I was only trying to love her.
But it is my alcoholic mind that makes me not trust someone. I know that trust is something that you should give to someone until they give you a reason not to, but I think it is like respect, you have to earn it.
And havinithard, I have like the Detroit Tigers all of my life. Through the good and the bad. They are having the best season they have had in 12 years and they are fun to watch. 33-14, the best record in all of baseball, there is nothing wrong with that. At least I have them to watch instead of staring at my ex's pics all the time.
But it is my alcoholic mind that makes me not trust someone. I know that trust is something that you should give to someone until they give you a reason not to, but I think it is like respect, you have to earn it.
And havinithard, I have like the Detroit Tigers all of my life. Through the good and the bad. They are having the best season they have had in 12 years and they are fun to watch. 33-14, the best record in all of baseball, there is nothing wrong with that. At least I have them to watch instead of staring at my ex's pics all the time.
FIRST.....VWgirl.....congrats on the relationship, see, its good to know that it can work if ya work it with some.!! Im truly happy for ya.
SECOND....LL..They might be havein a good winning streak...but they are known to screw it up somehow!!! lol.
OH, my advise on the GF and the whole stairing at her picts, throw them out and then you wont have to worry about looking at them anymore. Their are simple solutions to our problems today, but as a member of AA myself, we have a problem with makeing things diffucult sometimes.
HavinItHard
SECOND....LL..They might be havein a good winning streak...but they are known to screw it up somehow!!! lol.
OH, my advise on the GF and the whole stairing at her picts, throw them out and then you wont have to worry about looking at them anymore. Their are simple solutions to our problems today, but as a member of AA myself, we have a problem with makeing things diffucult sometimes.
HavinItHard
Havinithard,
The thing is I understand that she isn't ready, I was probably not really ready either. I think I am always ready. But that is my addict mind wanting instant gratifaction. I want to start over and be "friends first," but she won't even be my friend. It hurts when you love someone so much and they tell you the same stuff and then they disapear like a UFO sucked them off the planet.
What do you think about all the stuff that I said I wanted to talk about? You wanted to know, and you have no reply. Maybe a real e-mail? Or a phone call? I miss talking to you and I would like your support.
The thing is I understand that she isn't ready, I was probably not really ready either. I think I am always ready. But that is my addict mind wanting instant gratifaction. I want to start over and be "friends first," but she won't even be my friend. It hurts when you love someone so much and they tell you the same stuff and then they disapear like a UFO sucked them off the planet.
What do you think about all the stuff that I said I wanted to talk about? You wanted to know, and you have no reply. Maybe a real e-mail? Or a phone call? I miss talking to you and I would like your support.
