Hi all, Just had a few minutes went back to work today, doing good so far.
Had kinda rough evening yesterday with depression coming in on me .. used my dosage at differnt times today, hoping that catches it this evening.. anyway will check back in this evening..
Thanks
5 days down Sam
Redd
Redd
Hey Redd, I was looking for you last night , I was having a weird night. Even with the sub,, but I had just taken my daughter home to her moms and I had not eaten well yesterday might have had something to do with it , but I was feeling weird had some depression that I did not want to feel. I know it was post opiate withdrawl deprssion but it was tripping me out.... I feel much better today am working and I will see how it goes rest of day...
Thanks
It takes awhile for your DOC to get out of your system. Ya' know whats weird though is I never experienced depression at all. I have read that most people do, but I guess I got lucky. Glad you are feeling better.
I work 4 nights a week, so sometimes I'm not around at night, which lately seems to be a blessing in disguise. I always check for you in the morning though, see how you're doing and stuff.
Gotta go pick up my son at his buddys house, have a good one.
Redd
I work 4 nights a week, so sometimes I'm not around at night, which lately seems to be a blessing in disguise. I always check for you in the morning though, see how you're doing and stuff.
Gotta go pick up my son at his buddys house, have a good one.
Redd
Takasha, I STILL have bouts of depression, and I'm on sub and an antidepressant (though I'm about to get off of the antidepressants)..... I have no clinical depression at all & I guess I'm not really depressed, but sometimes I miss the feeling of the pills or I'll miss the energy I had.....
Or I'll start thinking about the people I've hurt along the way.....
It's normal, I know..... and the depression I suffered when I was not on the sub was so bad when I quit the pills the last time....
I also have really, REALLY vivid, detailed dreams...... I'm a writer and I have a big imagination and I guess it transfers over into my sleep as well. My husband wakes up and never remembers his dreams; I wake up and remember running away from armed lunatics, flying a plane across the lake, a madman and his sons breaking into my house and demanding pain pills (and me having to make the decision whether or not to just run out with my son or to go back and try to save my dogs as well).......
Sometimes I think these dreams are a way of us dealing with everything that we've suppressed so long with the pills; of our body "letting go".... Who knows.... I've always had vivid dreams and nightmares, but these seem much more real
Danielle
Or I'll start thinking about the people I've hurt along the way.....
It's normal, I know..... and the depression I suffered when I was not on the sub was so bad when I quit the pills the last time....
I also have really, REALLY vivid, detailed dreams...... I'm a writer and I have a big imagination and I guess it transfers over into my sleep as well. My husband wakes up and never remembers his dreams; I wake up and remember running away from armed lunatics, flying a plane across the lake, a madman and his sons breaking into my house and demanding pain pills (and me having to make the decision whether or not to just run out with my son or to go back and try to save my dogs as well).......
Sometimes I think these dreams are a way of us dealing with everything that we've suppressed so long with the pills; of our body "letting go".... Who knows.... I've always had vivid dreams and nightmares, but these seem much more real
Danielle
Thanks all, May it threw the day at work on just 4mgs. felt good all day.
The depression yesterday was a little intense just scared me a bit but lots of people help me put it in perspective.. Iam headed to a meeting right now.. I don't know have a little depression not much, maybe just tired from 8 hours of work...not sure yet if its going to mess with me or not.. right now its o.k.
Might get a little worse , later but I understand it better now.
Thanks for the input.
Dude you made it!!! Way to go, I was thinking about you while I was away these past few days, I am proud, and you didnt even use duct tape... way to go.
Best Regards,
Tom
Best Regards,
Tom
Thanks Tom , It has not been easy still isn't but its getting a little better. Iam just a little inpatient wish I could fast forward it all and be off this stuff. Clean and sober. But, I know, one day at a time. Would not be this far if it was not for JohnDee, you and the rest of the gang cheering me on. You dont know how much a few words from people I don't even know goes, or maybe you do.. This is dang near as good as going to a meeting especially right now while Iam going thru this dang withdrawl. There is good people at the meetings but, I don't say anything about the sub Iam on. Most of them think your just suppose to go to inpatient detox... old school I guess. Believe me, I had the duct tape out that night, don't know how I made it 24 hours. Well , I do you guys motivating me.
Thanks and welcome back
Sam
Well , I messed around to long and missed the meeting they start a 8 on Tues which I don't like to late for me , by the time I get home its after 9. And Iam trying to go to bed earlier when I was using i would stay up till 1,2,3 in the morning then try to get up and be at work at 8. Cazy. I prefer our 7p.m meeting we have two of those a week i just wait and go to those. Guess I just hang with you guys for a while tonight...
Danielle, you know you got something there, today I was o.k all day at work staying busy was even a little productive more than I have been. Some people said you look a little better, Yea , I guess, Iam not posioning my body anymore. But when you said you start thining about all the people you hurt etc. Seems like when I get home I get on the pity pot a little start thinking about bills, the people I let down and crap like that and that will feed any depression I got... I really got to change my routine when I come home, probably stay busy, hit a meeting, eat thats big for me. Yesterday, when it got real bad and I took a look at everything well I hardly ate yesterday , and just dealing with my daughter, I mean I love her more than ever , but shes a handful, I drove her to the closest city about 60 miles from here to meet her mom, got stuck up there in 5 p.m traffic, by the time I got home it was swirling. So , I guess I just over did it a little , gotta take it easy for a while and I know praying and turning those thoughts over to my higher power and forgiving myself for the mess I got myself in . Just some more postive thinking I guess, would help it all..
Anyway what you said , maybe think of that
Thanks
Danielle, you know you got something there, today I was o.k all day at work staying busy was even a little productive more than I have been. Some people said you look a little better, Yea , I guess, Iam not posioning my body anymore. But when you said you start thining about all the people you hurt etc. Seems like when I get home I get on the pity pot a little start thinking about bills, the people I let down and crap like that and that will feed any depression I got... I really got to change my routine when I come home, probably stay busy, hit a meeting, eat thats big for me. Yesterday, when it got real bad and I took a look at everything well I hardly ate yesterday , and just dealing with my daughter, I mean I love her more than ever , but shes a handful, I drove her to the closest city about 60 miles from here to meet her mom, got stuck up there in 5 p.m traffic, by the time I got home it was swirling. So , I guess I just over did it a little , gotta take it easy for a while and I know praying and turning those thoughts over to my higher power and forgiving myself for the mess I got myself in . Just some more postive thinking I guess, would help it all..
Anyway what you said , maybe think of that
Thanks
