Ive just been reading lots of the different postings on this site looking for answers as to why my brother took heroin amongst other drugs. Only i didnt find the answer and i cant ask him that answer now as the heroin has finally killed him. Not only has it killed him, it has taken a part of our family, although he was a pain in the neck, with his lies, his naughty ways to feed his habit and the worst thing of all was that we couldnt trust him. And as i now have to try to console my mum and try to give her answers that i just dont know the answers to but one thing that i keep telling her is that he wasnt all bad. some have said to me that he was a waister and a thief and its another pain in the neck off of the streets and yes he was all of these but he was a human being at the end of the day.
So to all of you out there that are users, please remember that you are not all bad and for what ever reason you take these drugs there are a million more reasons not to.
Good night Kris, Sleep tight and i really do hope that you are now at peace.
Hi Sarah,
Please know I am so very sorry about the loss of your brother.........I'm so, so sorry too for your mom's pain........I can not even imagine the hurt and stress and emotional upheaval she is going through.........you came to the right place, honey as like ya saw we know too well the pain and grief this drug causes.
Sarah, see them people got the shear ba*ls to even dare say that to you or to anyone else...........God forbid, but some day they'll need help or have a family memeber do something that isn't in societies eyes as right......and then maybe they'll shut the heck up.
Your brother was Blessed to have a family like yours..........and at the end of the day he was a human being, yeah, but so much more.......we're mothers and fathers and sons and daughters and siblings........we have good hearts, and senses of humor and we're intelligent and I am certain your brother was all these as well.
Sarah, the drug ya can't understand.........it's all consuming..........it eats us alive and all those we love as well...........forever remember your brother just that way as a dear brother, and a nice guy........the lies, stealing, jail stints, and the likes were a drug.............NOT your brother, honey.
Sarah, if you come back and I hope ya do..........check out on the part of the Board called FRIENDS/LOVED ONES/FAMILY..........they will help you immensely and help you to help your mom.........O.K.........and of course thank you for sharing with us.........and hop on here anytime, babes, K? Again, I am so sorry for the pain adn deep loss for your family.
Please know I am so very sorry about the loss of your brother.........I'm so, so sorry too for your mom's pain........I can not even imagine the hurt and stress and emotional upheaval she is going through.........you came to the right place, honey as like ya saw we know too well the pain and grief this drug causes.
Sarah, see them people got the shear ba*ls to even dare say that to you or to anyone else...........God forbid, but some day they'll need help or have a family memeber do something that isn't in societies eyes as right......and then maybe they'll shut the heck up.
Your brother was Blessed to have a family like yours..........and at the end of the day he was a human being, yeah, but so much more.......we're mothers and fathers and sons and daughters and siblings........we have good hearts, and senses of humor and we're intelligent and I am certain your brother was all these as well.
Sarah, the drug ya can't understand.........it's all consuming..........it eats us alive and all those we love as well...........forever remember your brother just that way as a dear brother, and a nice guy........the lies, stealing, jail stints, and the likes were a drug.............NOT your brother, honey.
Sarah, if you come back and I hope ya do..........check out on the part of the Board called FRIENDS/LOVED ONES/FAMILY..........they will help you immensely and help you to help your mom.........O.K.........and of course thank you for sharing with us.........and hop on here anytime, babes, K? Again, I am so sorry for the pain adn deep loss for your family.
Before we were addicts...we were:
kind
loving
caring
greatful
gifted
someone's family
someone's friend
someonee's loved one
and through it all...to the end of the dash....those are the things we will forever be..........R.I.P. fallen one(Kris)!
kind
loving
caring
greatful
gifted
someone's family
someone's friend
someonee's loved one
and through it all...to the end of the dash....those are the things we will forever be..........R.I.P. fallen one(Kris)!
Sarah, I'm so sorry for your loss, and for your sadness.
He is at peace, the addiction is over.
I will keep you and your family in my prayers.
rita
He is at peace, the addiction is over.
I will keep you and your family in my prayers.
rita
Sarah, i'm so sorry for you and your families loss.Kris, god rest you. Your brother was not all bad Sarah, and people saying that is well out of order...shallow as a puddlle if you ask me. Yeah, us addicts have done things that we're not proud of, but i don't know one person on this board who wouldn't want to change that. Remember the good times, remember the happy memories. Take care, Kev
Many thanks to all of you that have posted a note. We are having his funeral on Wednesday and as of yet my mother doesnt know the full extend of his death. There will be an inquest shortly after the funeral and then as a family before she finds out the real truth we have to sit her down and tell her. god knows how we are going to do that. he was her first born and through everything he did to her she loved him so much and it really has broken her heart.
once again thanks to all of you that have responded. I was once his baby sister and now im having to be my mums mum.
take care everyone.
once again thanks to all of you that have responded. I was once his baby sister and now im having to be my mums mum.
take care everyone.
Oh Sarah, I'm really so sorry............I wish there was a way to shield your mom somehow.........of course she loved him not matter what..........this is her son, and a mother's love knows no boundaries.
Sarah, one thing I can suggest and I'm not an expert or anything, but please let your mom KNOW it was not her FAULT.........she didn't CAUSE his addiction..........she couldn't have CONTROLLED it either..........plus we all pretty much did the worse things to our mom's basically because who else was going to forgive us and love us unconditionally.
Sarah, this may be just me but I was kind of reading into this that in your heart somewhere sure you may be mad..............and if you are that's alright......it's not a sin because your brothers actions now kind of are dictating how you have to be like ya said a mom to your own mom.
Just a thought..........please let us know how Wednsday goes if you can.
Sarah, one thing I can suggest and I'm not an expert or anything, but please let your mom KNOW it was not her FAULT.........she didn't CAUSE his addiction..........she couldn't have CONTROLLED it either..........plus we all pretty much did the worse things to our mom's basically because who else was going to forgive us and love us unconditionally.
Sarah, this may be just me but I was kind of reading into this that in your heart somewhere sure you may be mad..............and if you are that's alright......it's not a sin because your brothers actions now kind of are dictating how you have to be like ya said a mom to your own mom.
Just a thought..........please let us know how Wednsday goes if you can.
..Sarah..
..Sorry to read about your brothers death, heroin in my opinion is like no other drug when it comes to addiction..an addict will lie,cheat,steal etc to get a bag of smack..you turn into a different person when you need a bag..jekll n hyde definately.everyone starts uses gear for different reasons..but when we become addicted we use for 1 reason and thats because we were addicted to it..we needed it to stop ourselves going into withdrawal..to stop that mental torture it creates in us to use it..the cravings for heroin are like somthing you've never came across until a person is in that position..you know a 10 bag is around the corner but you've got no money. theirs no way to get money..your emotions and thinking is all over the place.then you see ya mums purse on the side..you cant ask to borrow a tenner cos you owe enough already or ya mum knows wot ya want the money for or wotever..so the only way you can stop the anguise your feeling is to steal the money from the purse ?..addicts will do anything to get the money for gear..sell wot they can sell..steal wot they can steal..beg wot they can beg..lie about anything that springs to mind to get ya hand on that bitta paper that will get you your fix?..no mother, father,daughter,brother or any other member of the family shouls blame themself if a loved one is a heroin addict..its a drug that has such a hold on a person when they're addicted to it, its so so hard to get away from..the withdrawals are horrendous and the cravings wont stop until an addict has had their fix ?..wotever people say about your brother don't know wot he had to go thru to feed his addiction..i've lied, stole, begged,borrowed,cheated, cried crocodile tears when i was using to feed my habit but it did'nt mean i did'nt love and feel such a b****** to my family while doing it..yes my mum blamed herself for the way i turned out..but was it no way her fault or any other persons fault that i became an addict..only myself can i point my finger at..your mum, you and rest of family should'nt blame themselfs..heroin rips families apart..its not just the addict who lives with addiction..its the family aswell..maybe the family feel the pain more as they see wot their loved one is putting him/herself thru ?..your brother is at peace now away from his nightmare..i sincerely wish you and your mum peace from now on as you grieve..Robbie..
..Sorry to read about your brothers death, heroin in my opinion is like no other drug when it comes to addiction..an addict will lie,cheat,steal etc to get a bag of smack..you turn into a different person when you need a bag..jekll n hyde definately.everyone starts uses gear for different reasons..but when we become addicted we use for 1 reason and thats because we were addicted to it..we needed it to stop ourselves going into withdrawal..to stop that mental torture it creates in us to use it..the cravings for heroin are like somthing you've never came across until a person is in that position..you know a 10 bag is around the corner but you've got no money. theirs no way to get money..your emotions and thinking is all over the place.then you see ya mums purse on the side..you cant ask to borrow a tenner cos you owe enough already or ya mum knows wot ya want the money for or wotever..so the only way you can stop the anguise your feeling is to steal the money from the purse ?..addicts will do anything to get the money for gear..sell wot they can sell..steal wot they can steal..beg wot they can beg..lie about anything that springs to mind to get ya hand on that bitta paper that will get you your fix?..no mother, father,daughter,brother or any other member of the family shouls blame themself if a loved one is a heroin addict..its a drug that has such a hold on a person when they're addicted to it, its so so hard to get away from..the withdrawals are horrendous and the cravings wont stop until an addict has had their fix ?..wotever people say about your brother don't know wot he had to go thru to feed his addiction..i've lied, stole, begged,borrowed,cheated, cried crocodile tears when i was using to feed my habit but it did'nt mean i did'nt love and feel such a b****** to my family while doing it..yes my mum blamed herself for the way i turned out..but was it no way her fault or any other persons fault that i became an addict..only myself can i point my finger at..your mum, you and rest of family should'nt blame themselfs..heroin rips families apart..its not just the addict who lives with addiction..its the family aswell..maybe the family feel the pain more as they see wot their loved one is putting him/herself thru ?..your brother is at peace now away from his nightmare..i sincerely wish you and your mum peace from now on as you grieve..Robbie..
i'm sorry 2 hear about ur brother . my thoughts go to ur familyand urself . my partners brother was from a respectable background ( father bankmanager ) he became addicted 2 heroin. died of an overdose and my partner also was distraught..................now she is an addict also..she didn't touch it b4 hand... how odd is that ?
Sarah ~
My heart breaks for you and your family and I sincerely hope that you will really feel what Robbie has said and take it into your heart as much as you can right now. This drug gripped your brother and he couldn't break its hold. Please don't let his torment become yours any more than it has already. I will pray for you and your family that you may all find peace as you grieve your loved one.
Peace~MomNMore
My heart breaks for you and your family and I sincerely hope that you will really feel what Robbie has said and take it into your heart as much as you can right now. This drug gripped your brother and he couldn't break its hold. Please don't let his torment become yours any more than it has already. I will pray for you and your family that you may all find peace as you grieve your loved one.
Peace~MomNMore
I am so sorry for your loss. Please know that there are people in society who understand the nature of drug addiction and do not judge your brother and your family. There are those of us who mourn the tragic loss of one so young and feel nothing but sympathy for their loved ones. Do not let stigma and the prejudice and ignorance of others taint your happy memories of your brother. A human being. Your brother. He is lucky to have had a family who loved him as you so obviously do.
My thoughts are with you and your family.
Maddy x
My thoughts are with you and your family.
Maddy x
So sorry about your brother. And being an addict is not the same as being a bad person. The addiction makes you do bad things, but that is never the whole story. Many of us addicts ended up on smack because there was something inside that was broken, and heroin killed the pain inside, but it comes with it's own problems, which I am sure you have experienced through the stuff that your brother did. I myself suffer from a long standing serious mental illness, which is now under control because of my medication. Unless you have had a heroin addiction you could not understand the pull of that drug. Love just isn't enough to make you stop, although you still go on loving. Heroin is just more powerful. it's more powerful than anything you will ever have experienced.
Please rest assured that your brother did love you and your mum. He didn't enjoy hurting you, but was in the grip of something that was stronger than him. Heroin takes you hostage, it hijacks your life, and as an addict, you just do what your addiction tells you, even though you know it's wrong. Dying of an overdose is painless - he wouldn't have known anything about it. It's like going to sleep. He would not have felt frightened or anything. It's a peaceful death.
I am a recovering addict, and a mum, and I so feel for your mother. To lose a child is the worst thing I could imagine.
Herion addicts are not evil. I consider myself to be a good person, a good mum, a good partner, a good daughter. I've done some bad things, but I've forgiven myself for those things, because I did them when I was insane. Please don't allow yourself to judge your brother on the worst things he's done, because that is never the whole story. Remember him the way he used to be, because that person was still inside, even if you thought he'd completely changed.
Sorry for your loss. RIP Kris.
best wishes
Diff x
Please rest assured that your brother did love you and your mum. He didn't enjoy hurting you, but was in the grip of something that was stronger than him. Heroin takes you hostage, it hijacks your life, and as an addict, you just do what your addiction tells you, even though you know it's wrong. Dying of an overdose is painless - he wouldn't have known anything about it. It's like going to sleep. He would not have felt frightened or anything. It's a peaceful death.
I am a recovering addict, and a mum, and I so feel for your mother. To lose a child is the worst thing I could imagine.
Herion addicts are not evil. I consider myself to be a good person, a good mum, a good partner, a good daughter. I've done some bad things, but I've forgiven myself for those things, because I did them when I was insane. Please don't allow yourself to judge your brother on the worst things he's done, because that is never the whole story. Remember him the way he used to be, because that person was still inside, even if you thought he'd completely changed.
Sorry for your loss. RIP Kris.
best wishes
Diff x
