I think that is what has been keeping me from posting since what - September? I had a serious flare-up with Endometriosis and the scar tissue from that surgery I had. I was down and out and crying and not sleeping, so the doc gave me a prescription. I couldn't even go get it. My now wife (married Oct1st) got the script, took it in to get it filled and brought it back to me while I was screaming and writhing on the floor. I took it - and have continued to take it - as prescribed since that episode. Why? Because "there's nothing more" that they can do for me. They tried to cure it every way they know how - but nothing worked. Now all they can do is try to make me comfey.
Do I take it EVERY day? No. But - maybe this is a relapse. But I was NOT able to live the other way. I tried - lord I tried.....The doc said that I was just one of the unfortunate ones who would have to rely on painkillers the rest of my life. That's sounding like a prison sentence, but - until the pain goes away for more than a day or two - I guess he is right.
I apologize to everyone for staying silent, but the shame kept me quiet.
Hey Sweety I remember you from that beautiful picture of you.Im so so sorry that you were in THAT much pain.You say your not abusing it only taking it as you should.In my book you didnt relapse.I also have chronic pain that is another reason for the suboxone.I dont think anyone should have to live in that kind of pain if they can take something.For most of us we cannot control ourselves not to overuse & thats where relapses & stuff come in.How are you feeling now any better???mj
Night and Day difference. I'm sleeping through the night instead of waking up and just rocking and rocking and rocking all night in a little ball just begging for it to let up. (yes - literally) So, I'm actually glad I'm taking it again. I'm actually using it LESS now than prescribed. I am supposed to go see my doc every month to be re-checked and re-prescribed, but I don't go but every 6 weeks or 7 weeks because i don't take it as much. Just when it gets really bad. And my now wife makes sure I stay on the straight and narrow with it.
Thank you for the post. I needed that.
Thank you for the post. I needed that.
Hi Sibeluvr....just wanted to pop in and say hello....no, i don't believe you relapsed....pain is pain, and is no way to live....
congrats on the new wife!
i've missed you sweetie!
congrats on the new wife!
i've missed you sweetie!
I agree...living with constant pain is unacceptable. You're doing the right thing. Thanks for coming back!
Jim
Jim
Sibr..it's just an opinion (I have to say that from now on) but as long as your taking them as directed and are accountable to someone for those pills, I don't think you've relapsed. However...only you know the truth. Only you know how much pain and how much tolerance you have to that pain. I will never be able to tell if I need pain pills again. Of course I would want them for pain, but do I need them? I'll never know that answer. I have to let someone else tell me.
What about surgery? Is that an option? For me it was the only option because I chose not to be in that pain for the rest of my life.
I guess all you can do is keep checking your motives. It's so easy for us to start taking them responsibly and then have that addiction kick in and run with it. Before you know it, you're taking 3 times the prescribed amount.
Congrats on your marriage..is she as pretty as you?
Cowgirl
What about surgery? Is that an option? For me it was the only option because I chose not to be in that pain for the rest of my life.
I guess all you can do is keep checking your motives. It's so easy for us to start taking them responsibly and then have that addiction kick in and run with it. Before you know it, you're taking 3 times the prescribed amount.
Congrats on your marriage..is she as pretty as you?
Cowgirl
Do you have safety nets in place to PREVENT you from abusing the meds??
What are they??
Are you confident that you will not abuse them again??
I agree with MJ that no one should have to live with excruciating daily pain.
I will add you to my prayer list - a pain free life for you sweetie!!
How is everything else in life going for you??
Congrat's on the new marriage!!!
Am I remembering correctly that you were supposed to go to Hawaii for your honeymoon?? Or some other awesome place??
My memory is not the best .....
But I do also remember your pic - in front of the football stadium. (you are very pretty and i thought that photo was so cool)
Gotta run for now .... it's Friday and I want to get out of the office on time ....
TGIF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
:-)
Swizzle
What are they??
Are you confident that you will not abuse them again??
I agree with MJ that no one should have to live with excruciating daily pain.
I will add you to my prayer list - a pain free life for you sweetie!!
How is everything else in life going for you??
Congrat's on the new marriage!!!
Am I remembering correctly that you were supposed to go to Hawaii for your honeymoon?? Or some other awesome place??
My memory is not the best .....
But I do also remember your pic - in front of the football stadium. (you are very pretty and i thought that photo was so cool)
Gotta run for now .... it's Friday and I want to get out of the office on time ....
TGIF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
:-)
Swizzle
Wow - lots of posts!
Yes, I am accountable to both my new wife who keeps them for me and my doctor who pulls the insurance report on me every month, etc.
I basically only take them if a) I can't function without balling up and b) I can't sleep. It's usually the weekends when I don't take anything in the am and just sit in the tub for a while. SO - I'm doing good with it right now.
Good to see everyone again!!!! You remembered the pic!? How sweet! I forgot how to post it back, but I'll go back and try to do it again. :0)
Thank you guys for taking the time to welcome me back and give me some encouragement!
Yes, I am accountable to both my new wife who keeps them for me and my doctor who pulls the insurance report on me every month, etc.
I basically only take them if a) I can't function without balling up and b) I can't sleep. It's usually the weekends when I don't take anything in the am and just sit in the tub for a while. SO - I'm doing good with it right now.
Good to see everyone again!!!! You remembered the pic!? How sweet! I forgot how to post it back, but I'll go back and try to do it again. :0)
Thank you guys for taking the time to welcome me back and give me some encouragement!
Sounds like you are on the right track and planning to stay there!!
TGIF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TGIF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok - here's me! I hope this works!
Which one is your new wife?
Again..such a pretty girl.
Is surgery not an option? Did I miss that?
CG
Again..such a pretty girl.
Is surgery not an option? Did I miss that?
CG
Are you a model? you should be!
And no, I don't think you relapsed. You have a medical condition.
Love, Kat
And no, I don't think you relapsed. You have a medical condition.
Love, Kat
I'm so sorry! I meant to answer that one too - It's such a Friday! I had the surgery. ALL of the surgery. To the point of the complete hysterectomy. But - they can't remove my bladder or intestines that are laced with it. I've tried to come off the hormones, but when I do that - my PTSD strikes, I rage and people get hurt, so that's a baaaaad idea. But yes, we've tried everything else....I even went to counseling to see if it was in my head, etc. Bleh. The wife is in THIS pic with me! (I'm in the dress, obviously! hee hee)
This is our very first dance!
This is our very first dance!
Here's the pic of my new wife.....Sorry, Cowgirl, I didn't know you really can't see her face in the other one. This is MY Cowgirl!
Oh Kat! I just saw your post! How SWEEEEEEET! No - not a model. Wow - you just made my YEAR! Blushing!!!!!!!
y'all are a couple of lovely ladies....much happiness to you!
Congradulations to you both! Your wife is a lucky lady. (I bet she shows you off all the time, hehe)
I'm sorry you have to go through such pain. I'm glad though, that you have a good support system and are doing all the right things.
Love, Kat
I'm sorry you have to go through such pain. I'm glad though, that you have a good support system and are doing all the right things.
Love, Kat
God, no wonder you may have to take meds for the rest of your life..no, you kinda need your bladder...lol, it's not funny, I know.
Hopefully medical science will come up with something better for you...
Nice looking Cowgirl...you're lucky to have eachother.
Here's to a long and happy life together.
Cowgirl
Hopefully medical science will come up with something better for you...
Nice looking Cowgirl...you're lucky to have eachother.
Here's to a long and happy life together.
Cowgirl
Dear Sibe Your still as beautiful!!! Congratuations Im sorry I forgot to say that.I hope that your very happy with lots of love.
Wow youve had everything just about taken out & the pain was still that bad?Have you ever been checked for other problems in those areas?Like chron(which I have)or other things that maybe are different from the scar tissue.By the way Im so glad your doing better,its good to see you posting again....mj
Wow youve had everything just about taken out & the pain was still that bad?Have you ever been checked for other problems in those areas?Like chron(which I have)or other things that maybe are different from the scar tissue.By the way Im so glad your doing better,its good to see you posting again....mj
Can I just say that the problem with taking opiate analagesia for chrnic pain is that your body will need more over time to get the same pain control. If you are going to be on opiate pain control for life you might be better placed with a long-actiing opiate such as Buprenorphine.
