Tim,
Yes, I do wish Karen would stick around long enough to chat. But, at least she is revisiting the same thread, so now I know she is reading what has been written.
Thanks for continuing to post to her. She needs to hear these things. I think many have stopped posting because she doesn't always respond and they wonder if she reads all the advice. Sometimes I post the same things over, just in case she missed it before.
If she really has 4 days, I wish she would check into rehab. After 20 years, those tools have got to be rusty! It's so hard to "see" how things could be for others when they cannot see it themselves.
I know Karen lives with an emotionally abusive husband and is very codependant. I think she is afraid to go to rehab because of what he might do while she is gone. I'd be willing to bet that he isn't going anywhere, in spite of all the threats. Who knows? Maybe their marriage might improve if she got clean. If not, at least she could proceed with a clear mind.
I think Karen just needs to FORGET about everyone else, forget what they think, what they might be saying, and focus only on Karen and getting clean and staying clean.
Keep up the posts to her, something just might stick.
Merry Christmas to you too, Tim...and Karen too. Mine is shaping up to be s***ty, but at least it will be over soon.
Thanks Atlas.I always have posted to her.Last summer I got blasted by members here when I questioned her for taking Percocet for a headache but I have continued to follow her.I know,you know,we all know what it's like to live in that hell so I am never in a place of judgement about it.I've relapsed many times and it's not about that either.
Everybody here deserves the same chance.When it comes to the active disease of addiction,there is nothing nice about it.It may take longer for others but hopefully they will hear something along the way.
I'm sorry your holidays are starting out bad.If I can help in anyway,don't hesitate to ask.Right now,I'm o.k.I'm approaching it as just another day in the week and trying to be grateful that the traffic is getting a little better.LOL
Later my friend
Everybody here deserves the same chance.When it comes to the active disease of addiction,there is nothing nice about it.It may take longer for others but hopefully they will hear something along the way.
I'm sorry your holidays are starting out bad.If I can help in anyway,don't hesitate to ask.Right now,I'm o.k.I'm approaching it as just another day in the week and trying to be grateful that the traffic is getting a little better.LOL
Later my friend
Atlas - I'm sorry your holiday is shaping up to be "sh!tty"..... hope it gets better, or is over quickly, whichever you prefer.
My daughter is in southeast asia (saving the world, has been gone since August) and my son is spending this holiday with his soon-to-be fiancee's family (well, we love her, so we HOPE she is soon to be his fiancee) so I've been a little "down in the mouth" shall we say.
But... my husband just reminded me that things are really OK, and good...
so I hope you end up having the same.
Love
Sue (I posted on your college credit thread - I think there are TONS of ways to get those credits recognized. Start with a "brick and mortar" college if possible - I know you live in a small town - and see if THEY have online courses, rather than using an online college to begin with.)
My daughter is in southeast asia (saving the world, has been gone since August) and my son is spending this holiday with his soon-to-be fiancee's family (well, we love her, so we HOPE she is soon to be his fiancee) so I've been a little "down in the mouth" shall we say.
But... my husband just reminded me that things are really OK, and good...
so I hope you end up having the same.
Love
Sue (I posted on your college credit thread - I think there are TONS of ways to get those credits recognized. Start with a "brick and mortar" college if possible - I know you live in a small town - and see if THEY have online courses, rather than using an online college to begin with.)
yes atlis, and tim im reading, thankyou for your onesty, things have been ok, here writ now, iv gone 4days no, its not been to bade, i will try to explan, with my friend, were i go for my recovory, and mettings, not everone is a addict, she has no addiction,but her husben is, but she went throu the program, 20 years ago, you see we can go to mettings there enytime, well the program is going on, we have groups one one,on ones, we can see a concler if we want, it does not cost, we are alumni, and have gone thror the program, so we go back to help the new person, i don,t now if the states has enything like this, we do have aa,@na, but i choess to go to my home, i hpoe it is not to hard to understan, have a great cristmas, love karen
I think I get it Karen. They are meetings that can be for substance abuse but not necessarily? Is that right? If so, while I think they probably are very helpful, you should consider adding AA or NA to the mix. A person can never have too much support. Since you are still struggling, adding AA/NA might be just what you need to give you that extra little push you need.
I think, and someone can correct me if I'm wrong, that having a recovering addict as a sponsor serves several purposes. Only an addict, in many cases, can truly understand how addicts are. I know of a few non addicts that maybe could, but I think they are few and far between.
We are master manipulators that will say anything to get our high is we desire to get high. An addict with a good head on her shoulders and significant clean time will be able to call you out on the addict manipulation type behavior. A non addict may not always see through the manipulating things that us addicts will do. See what I mean? If you had a good AA/NA sponsor, it would just add to your support system.
I'm happy that you do read these threads. I'm going to sign off, but reiterate one more time.....Please check into rehab. You said yourself that physically you are not doing to bad. The timing is perfect for you to go through a rehab program. Forget your husband. He's not going to make good on his threats or he would have by now. Your marriage only stands to improve from this, no matter what he may say now.
Gossip....FORGET IT. If you live in a small town and are walking around loaded on pills, they are already talking. At this point the only thing that will be left for them to talk about is how much better you are doing! Let them see the real you. The real Karen who has been buried under the thick fog of drugs.
I wish you a very Merry Christmas. Please do some soul searching during this holiday. Ask God to guide you.
Take Care.
I think, and someone can correct me if I'm wrong, that having a recovering addict as a sponsor serves several purposes. Only an addict, in many cases, can truly understand how addicts are. I know of a few non addicts that maybe could, but I think they are few and far between.
We are master manipulators that will say anything to get our high is we desire to get high. An addict with a good head on her shoulders and significant clean time will be able to call you out on the addict manipulation type behavior. A non addict may not always see through the manipulating things that us addicts will do. See what I mean? If you had a good AA/NA sponsor, it would just add to your support system.
I'm happy that you do read these threads. I'm going to sign off, but reiterate one more time.....Please check into rehab. You said yourself that physically you are not doing to bad. The timing is perfect for you to go through a rehab program. Forget your husband. He's not going to make good on his threats or he would have by now. Your marriage only stands to improve from this, no matter what he may say now.
Gossip....FORGET IT. If you live in a small town and are walking around loaded on pills, they are already talking. At this point the only thing that will be left for them to talk about is how much better you are doing! Let them see the real you. The real Karen who has been buried under the thick fog of drugs.
I wish you a very Merry Christmas. Please do some soul searching during this holiday. Ask God to guide you.
Take Care.
Karen,I understand.It's not an NA/AA meeting.I'm sure it helpful but it is not the same.A 12th step program gets you started on a specific agenda that focuses on the 12 steps,which is the background of recovery.A sponsor is one who has clean time and has worked those steps.
If we could have just picked anyone to be our sponsor,I would have chosen my Pharmacist.LOL He knew me very well.j/k
Happy Holidays
If we could have just picked anyone to be our sponsor,I would have chosen my Pharmacist.LOL He knew me very well.j/k
Happy Holidays
Karen, you have gotten some wonderful advice here, I just wanted to pop in and tell you Merry Christmas....I hope that you continue to stay clean and grow in your recovery...God Bless You!
Karen...just wanted to say Merry Christmas to you and to let you know that with all of the support here from people who aren't patting you on the back telling you it's ok to take pills, you do have a chance at this little thing called recovery. If it's true that you haven't used for 4 days, you could quite possibly, be over the worst of the withdrawals. Now it's time to work on the emotional crap. You may not think you are strong enough to do this, I disagree. I think by coming back here for as long as you have, you want this pretty bad. But at some point, you have to do it differently. You can't expect different results by doing the same things over and over. Just know how much people here care honey. Take care, Cowgirl
merrycristmas to all, thankyou for the menny post, but today im sturglinh with my yougest son, my oldest son has come home from to, for cristmas, and his gierlfriend, and thats great, but my other son is in bade chap, his a lot off downers, and meth, and now acohol, last nite he was suppose to come to a dinner with all of us, but he stad home getting hight, we have our gradkids today, part of me is feeling vary gulte, about letting my son, drink, in our home at times, and for always giving in to him, he is so mush like me,its, scary, i now the only way things will change with him is if chang we were in recovory togeather last year, nut it seemed like when i went back to yousing so did he, i also see alot of my brother in him, and my brother died from drugs, a few years back, and that scaers the sh--- out of me, i want today to just be nice for everone, say a prayer, for my famile, have a great cristmas, love karen.
Karen-Until you let go of your son,husband and whoever else is using in your house and focus on getting clean,I'm afraid not much will change.
All of you using and drinking in the same house is like the" blind leading the blind."
Even if you get clean,you still won't be able to fix them.From your previous threads it sounds like they all have had some experience in Recovery.They know what to do and so do you.
My wish for you this Christmas is to get clean and get into an intense Rehab program or an IOP.
Merry Christmas
All of you using and drinking in the same house is like the" blind leading the blind."
Even if you get clean,you still won't be able to fix them.From your previous threads it sounds like they all have had some experience in Recovery.They know what to do and so do you.
My wish for you this Christmas is to get clean and get into an intense Rehab program or an IOP.
Merry Christmas
Karen...just wondering how you survived Christmas day? Are you still clean? What's next?
Cowgirl
Cowgirl
