Garry,
I recently read one of your responses to a woman who was sick of leading a double life as her husband is on heroin....maybe you have read some of my posts...Gut feeling again....Need an addict's expert advice...etc.
If you had or would care to you would then be apprised of what i have been dealing with in regards to my 51 yr old boyfriend's heroin habit which he has had for over 25 yrs and now supposedly has been put on hold due to his starting probation for a reduced sentence of drug possession from the original charge of drug trafficking....he claims his innocence of both charges and abusing heroin as well even tho he was living with an old friend drug dealer for 2 years who she herself had a 1500 dollar a month habit in addition to abusing her methadone and i have seen him cop from her in the past......anyway Garry if you get a chance to read some of my posts and could offer me any advice as to the sincerity of my boyfriend's claims that he has been H clean for 2 years but smoked pot to fend off the urges for the former and i will tell you personally and honestly Garry in my opinion my boyfriend is full of sh** as even tho i have 17 years free from alcohol abuse(never did hard drugs) i still couldn't live in a liquor store or with a liquor store owner and remain clean...
Thank you for your time......MARY
Hi,
g f m 0 0 1 @ a o l is my email address. I'd love to let you know what ever you need to know. But Mary, be warned, don't ask unless you really want to know the answer.
I am 49. I have been using herion since I was 10 years old. Yes mam, 10. It's a story that would piss you off. Every time I recall the begining I get pretty pist off. Perhaps soon in the future I'd share the trueth with you and every one else that wishes to read it.
Your ol man. 51? Well we both all ready know he is full of s*** Mary, the true question here is how much longer do you want to live a lie? He is strung out, you know it. And if some steps are not taken now it will not ever stop until he dies or goes to the pen. And even at the pen, there is just as much herion in there then their is on the streets. Actually, it is easier to get it there because every one knows everyone. In the pen ypou just have to put out a kite to the neighborhood and some one will come back with it or a story on the person. Another words if he is a rat or not. Or if he/she is solid or not. Yeah, I did my time in there too. For what? DRUGS!!
Your old man has two lovers. This is what you really must get right inside of your own head and understand it. You see, I truely believe he loves you. And I am sure he'll drop to his knees and lick the dust off the bottom of your feet. He will go that far, trust me. But he also has another lover. Herion. She is everything to him. Even the best possible sex you could perform on him could not even come close to herion. She does so much for him that you could never get close enough. She will relax him. She will make him feel good. And she will make him Hi. These things are to say the least of just a few things herion can do far better than you can do.
When he tells you that he stopped using then you need to ask youself if this is true. Remember what herion does for him. Each day a junky always plans out a way to arrange to have herion purchased for him, everyday. This means he will sell the TV, the car, the furniture, and so on and so on and DO what ever he has to do just to get that b**** into his pocket where it will stay until he agrees with himself to pull her out and slams it.Tell me, has things turned up missing? Or some money is missing or he spent it for something the store would not retuen the money. Here is a good one we all have used in one form or another. I got into a car accident and if I don't pay them $9,999.00 dollars by the end of today they will call the cops and all out hell breaks out.
You said he was busted for trafficing? And it is now been dropped to a lessor charge. They do have plea bargins, lets just hope that is all it was. The last thing you need is to some ex-friends coming to the door wanting his balls.
Here is what to look for. There are so many ways to take herion. Some people smoke it, some people eat it, I have seen people push it up into their rectums. Usually it is injected with a needle. I once used it by shooting it in my arm. Problem was after awhile I was showing marks and trails. This caused me to move to my legs. I would find veins all over the place there. And don't forget the neck. That big fat vein that runs straight into the brain. Oh yes, that was a most crazy way to do it..
After shooting herion for thirty nine years I finally have wasted all my viens. They are all gone or so thin and small that it is impossible to to use them. Now I use my hips which are now showing signs of wear and tear.
There is some really bad herion out there now a days. The cut they use today is some mean crap. There is a high percentage of people reporting into the hospitals with what looks like boils. Hugh amount of pus and blood comes out from them. At first it comes out so much it scares you because it just keeps coming and coming. Then when you think that there just isn't any more blood left in your body the other boil pops. There are nasty. I wonder if your old man has had any boils lately? I knew a few people now that almost died from this. The hospitals have to lance them and then scrub them out. My brother had seven of them which his yells were heard from the OR to the waiting area which were seperated by two walls and what seemed to be a 1/4 mile away..
I am sorry, I'll get back to your concerns. Mary, I hate to say this because I am going to tell you to leave him if he fails to listen to you NOW. Because if you don't, the odds are against you that you will be able to retire without any form of security. Now, if he has some money stashed away and let's say he is rich then there is another way you can approach this but it will mean taken on more than what you really need too handle. Like what? Still living the way you are now. Lies, bullsh=t, no trust, and no relationship to speak of. But, I suppose there is always a chance, maybe.
You see Mary, he really loves herion. I mean he really loves that drug. Hey, so do I. When I get her into my system I feel so good. I am feeling fine. And it's a feeling you could never be able to give to him. And because he is so use to the drug he don't get sick like people throwing up. At first there is no hang over at all. But there is another element waiting for me. That monkey (as expressed) on my back. The withdraw. Dear god, I would rather just die then go through that.
Mary, do you know what a with draw really is? I mean do you rwelly know what it is all about? Of course that is another story. But because that withdraw is so bad it is what makes us drug addicts criminals. The withdraw is extremely impossible to deal with without help. I mean professional help. For those of us that claim we can do it at home all by our selfs is one big fat B.Sh--t LIE. The trueth is I really don't want to go to the detox center and lye down on a sick looking mattress on the floor that is just six inches away from another person detoxing too. Watching that poor fool detoxing would do nothing less than get me to start feeling even more worse than what I am watching. The next thjing I know I will be on the phone calling home with a big lie that I made up just to get some one to feel sorry for me and come and get me.
And that is when I am at my best. The lies just seem to pop out of my head, one after another until I have someone giving in to my pleas. Then what happens is I get home, I call the drug connection and get him to met me as fast as possible. "Don't this sound as if I have done this before?" Several times.
Mary, I am sure you love him. BUt you just can't allow this to go on any more. More so than any other reason is that he is in his fifties. This is it. There is no turning back. There are no more second chances. We are just to old now. And there is nothing worse then a has been junkie still strung out.
What can you do for him? OK. You do this. You go to your old man and tell him you need to talk. Don't let this get argumentive. He will not want to talk about this topic, he will run and hide. He will plea with you to stop or if he feels threatened he will become desperate. If he gets threatening then don't say nothing and just leave. When he ask where your going just tell him your going out for fresh air. Instead, leave. Stay at a friends for the night. OK?
The next day or so tell him that if he really has the love for you that he claims to have then he must go into detox. TODAY. Let him know you will wait for him, you love him, and that there is no way in the world anyone could split the both of you apart. Mary, this is part of the game, trust me. He must be assured you love him. Tell him to call you everyday and give you updates.
You mentioned methadone. Is he still on that? If so, you have more problems. Methadone is twice as hard to kick than herion. Methadone takes about six long weeks to get out of your system. I do know this from experience of kicking while in jail. And boy did I hate every minute.And Mary, the detox clinic will tell you it takes ten days to two weeks. I will say this, that is bull. They don't know because almost everyone of them are graduates from college that studied phycology and are putting in time to their careers. Non of which never been through the loops of escaping from Satan's drug.
I just noticed the time. I got to hit the bed. I got a lot to do tomorrow. Believe this or not, but I have to be at church by 9:AM. Yes, I am strung and going to church too. Because I too want to finish this. I have all the pieces to a beautiful pie. And when I get this out of my system my new life will provide me with some nice rewards. I believe in Jesus Christ and yes I have a testimony as to why.
Let me know if you got this letter. If you email me please put in the subject line that it's Mary. I'll know it is you. Good luck.
g f m 0 0 1 @ a o l is my email address. I'd love to let you know what ever you need to know. But Mary, be warned, don't ask unless you really want to know the answer.
I am 49. I have been using herion since I was 10 years old. Yes mam, 10. It's a story that would piss you off. Every time I recall the begining I get pretty pist off. Perhaps soon in the future I'd share the trueth with you and every one else that wishes to read it.
Your ol man. 51? Well we both all ready know he is full of s*** Mary, the true question here is how much longer do you want to live a lie? He is strung out, you know it. And if some steps are not taken now it will not ever stop until he dies or goes to the pen. And even at the pen, there is just as much herion in there then their is on the streets. Actually, it is easier to get it there because every one knows everyone. In the pen ypou just have to put out a kite to the neighborhood and some one will come back with it or a story on the person. Another words if he is a rat or not. Or if he/she is solid or not. Yeah, I did my time in there too. For what? DRUGS!!
Your old man has two lovers. This is what you really must get right inside of your own head and understand it. You see, I truely believe he loves you. And I am sure he'll drop to his knees and lick the dust off the bottom of your feet. He will go that far, trust me. But he also has another lover. Herion. She is everything to him. Even the best possible sex you could perform on him could not even come close to herion. She does so much for him that you could never get close enough. She will relax him. She will make him feel good. And she will make him Hi. These things are to say the least of just a few things herion can do far better than you can do.
When he tells you that he stopped using then you need to ask youself if this is true. Remember what herion does for him. Each day a junky always plans out a way to arrange to have herion purchased for him, everyday. This means he will sell the TV, the car, the furniture, and so on and so on and DO what ever he has to do just to get that b**** into his pocket where it will stay until he agrees with himself to pull her out and slams it.Tell me, has things turned up missing? Or some money is missing or he spent it for something the store would not retuen the money. Here is a good one we all have used in one form or another. I got into a car accident and if I don't pay them $9,999.00 dollars by the end of today they will call the cops and all out hell breaks out.
You said he was busted for trafficing? And it is now been dropped to a lessor charge. They do have plea bargins, lets just hope that is all it was. The last thing you need is to some ex-friends coming to the door wanting his balls.
Here is what to look for. There are so many ways to take herion. Some people smoke it, some people eat it, I have seen people push it up into their rectums. Usually it is injected with a needle. I once used it by shooting it in my arm. Problem was after awhile I was showing marks and trails. This caused me to move to my legs. I would find veins all over the place there. And don't forget the neck. That big fat vein that runs straight into the brain. Oh yes, that was a most crazy way to do it..
After shooting herion for thirty nine years I finally have wasted all my viens. They are all gone or so thin and small that it is impossible to to use them. Now I use my hips which are now showing signs of wear and tear.
There is some really bad herion out there now a days. The cut they use today is some mean crap. There is a high percentage of people reporting into the hospitals with what looks like boils. Hugh amount of pus and blood comes out from them. At first it comes out so much it scares you because it just keeps coming and coming. Then when you think that there just isn't any more blood left in your body the other boil pops. There are nasty. I wonder if your old man has had any boils lately? I knew a few people now that almost died from this. The hospitals have to lance them and then scrub them out. My brother had seven of them which his yells were heard from the OR to the waiting area which were seperated by two walls and what seemed to be a 1/4 mile away..
I am sorry, I'll get back to your concerns. Mary, I hate to say this because I am going to tell you to leave him if he fails to listen to you NOW. Because if you don't, the odds are against you that you will be able to retire without any form of security. Now, if he has some money stashed away and let's say he is rich then there is another way you can approach this but it will mean taken on more than what you really need too handle. Like what? Still living the way you are now. Lies, bullsh=t, no trust, and no relationship to speak of. But, I suppose there is always a chance, maybe.
You see Mary, he really loves herion. I mean he really loves that drug. Hey, so do I. When I get her into my system I feel so good. I am feeling fine. And it's a feeling you could never be able to give to him. And because he is so use to the drug he don't get sick like people throwing up. At first there is no hang over at all. But there is another element waiting for me. That monkey (as expressed) on my back. The withdraw. Dear god, I would rather just die then go through that.
Mary, do you know what a with draw really is? I mean do you rwelly know what it is all about? Of course that is another story. But because that withdraw is so bad it is what makes us drug addicts criminals. The withdraw is extremely impossible to deal with without help. I mean professional help. For those of us that claim we can do it at home all by our selfs is one big fat B.Sh--t LIE. The trueth is I really don't want to go to the detox center and lye down on a sick looking mattress on the floor that is just six inches away from another person detoxing too. Watching that poor fool detoxing would do nothing less than get me to start feeling even more worse than what I am watching. The next thjing I know I will be on the phone calling home with a big lie that I made up just to get some one to feel sorry for me and come and get me.
And that is when I am at my best. The lies just seem to pop out of my head, one after another until I have someone giving in to my pleas. Then what happens is I get home, I call the drug connection and get him to met me as fast as possible. "Don't this sound as if I have done this before?" Several times.
Mary, I am sure you love him. BUt you just can't allow this to go on any more. More so than any other reason is that he is in his fifties. This is it. There is no turning back. There are no more second chances. We are just to old now. And there is nothing worse then a has been junkie still strung out.
What can you do for him? OK. You do this. You go to your old man and tell him you need to talk. Don't let this get argumentive. He will not want to talk about this topic, he will run and hide. He will plea with you to stop or if he feels threatened he will become desperate. If he gets threatening then don't say nothing and just leave. When he ask where your going just tell him your going out for fresh air. Instead, leave. Stay at a friends for the night. OK?
The next day or so tell him that if he really has the love for you that he claims to have then he must go into detox. TODAY. Let him know you will wait for him, you love him, and that there is no way in the world anyone could split the both of you apart. Mary, this is part of the game, trust me. He must be assured you love him. Tell him to call you everyday and give you updates.
You mentioned methadone. Is he still on that? If so, you have more problems. Methadone is twice as hard to kick than herion. Methadone takes about six long weeks to get out of your system. I do know this from experience of kicking while in jail. And boy did I hate every minute.And Mary, the detox clinic will tell you it takes ten days to two weeks. I will say this, that is bull. They don't know because almost everyone of them are graduates from college that studied phycology and are putting in time to their careers. Non of which never been through the loops of escaping from Satan's drug.
I just noticed the time. I got to hit the bed. I got a lot to do tomorrow. Believe this or not, but I have to be at church by 9:AM. Yes, I am strung and going to church too. Because I too want to finish this. I have all the pieces to a beautiful pie. And when I get this out of my system my new life will provide me with some nice rewards. I believe in Jesus Christ and yes I have a testimony as to why.
Let me know if you got this letter. If you email me please put in the subject line that it's Mary. I'll know it is you. Good luck.