Hello,
I am new to this site. I am in recovery from heroin, mainly, but I've done drugs my whole life. A little about me...
I am a 44 year old female. I live just a few miles from Detroit, Mi. I grew up partying. Me and all my brothers partied. As we got older, things got harder and harder...going from weed and acid to heroin and crack. Ten years ago, my brother got out of prison from a three year bit and OD'd three weeks later. That is when my addiction went from being a pretty functional (work hard play hard) addict, to ripping off the companies we had contracts with, after losing our family business, I started boosting. I'm a WAY better booster than a trick. I feel I had too many brothers to really be able to run around and sleep with men for money (lol). BUT...over the years my Retail Fraud charges became habitual, so started BnE's and a Home Invasion. Not to mention scrapping houses, robbing people, being on the street. I'm sure you get the idea. Well, I was in Oakland Co Jail in 2012 when my dad passed. That bothered me, but he was old, so you kind of expect something like that. In July 2014, I lost my other little brother to heroin. In December 2014, my best guy friend from high school OD'd and died laying next to me in bed. That all really f***ed me up. In April this year, my mom died.
August 4 of this year, I walked in the methadone clinic ready to find a way to start new. (I REALLY DO NOT want advice on why I shouldn't be in a meth clinic. I've tried everything at least once and KNOW this is what I need right NOW). I see a psych, two counselors, two job rediness people, and reach out on-line.
It just seems nothing is helping me deal with my grief issues. I don't sit there and cry over this stuff or really even mention it that often. As a matter of fact, when my brother passed ten years ago, I cried daily for one year. Since then, everyone that has passed, I haven't shed a tear over. I know that I need to deal with these issues tho, even though I couldn't tell you how it effects me on a daily basis. It just seems my attitude about life is so different from EVERYONE else, and my perspective is so morbid. My jokes get me very strange looks (lol) and sometimes I wonder if i have truly gone crazy.
If anyone can give me some advice (web-sites, self-help books,etc.) I would really appreciate it.
Sincerely,
Lisa H.
Lisa:
Are you attending NA/AA meetings?
For me and millions of others that's where the magic happens.
I'm not far from you, just over the border south of Windsor.
Good luck.
Bob R
Are you attending NA/AA meetings?
For me and millions of others that's where the magic happens.
I'm not far from you, just over the border south of Windsor.
Good luck.
Bob R
