He Wont Leave

well yesterday was like any other for me my husband came home acting like a weirdo like he always does after spending the day on crack. so i asked if he used of course he said no so i told him to go pee so i could drug test him he fessed up( thank god i didnt have a test i forgot to buy it this week). so per our last agreement of if he used he would leave so i didnt uproot the children, the jerk wont leave saying he swears he is done this time is different, by the way i finally followed threw with filing for legal seperation the papers were served monday but i didnt give them to him because i was waiting to see if for some crazy reason he was actually going to quit should have known better than that. this week he wants to go to meetings and start going to church which would be great had he not told me the same thing um last week. i didnt see him even out of bed when church started last week, and meetings well there are only five a day every single day of the week but none of them seem by his accounts to accomadate his schedule. if only i could knock him upside his head and have him wake up in a rehab that is guarded like prison he couldnt get out of.
mommy, he's playing you. what he is doing is very pre-meditated and deliberate. he's "protecting his addiction," which all addicts do, while keeping you in a state of emotional turmoil in order to control you. Your reaction is very predictable, which is why he continues.

Looks like you are finding your way out of his madness.
You have to be the stronger one here, unless you want your kids growing up in that environment,probly becoming addicts themselves from seeing it all their lives.I know i sounded harsh,but it's the truth.Do what is best for your kids.They will thank you when they grow up.go to your church they can be great supporters, mine is.Your children my not like it at first but keep why you are doing it.I seen on Oprah today,write your feelings out.it makes you see things in a broader way,boy this is true.Go ahead write out where you will be if your husband won't stop using and you stay.weigh out the pros and cons of your relationship when he's lieing to you.when you leave, make him go to councilling prove himself to you. If you's are what he really wants.even when you think he's all better,remember he'll always need councilling.good luck