I just want to introduce myself alittle.
I live in a small town in Florida (rodeo country). infact when i was going thru (one of my times) of addiction i found myself in a meeting saying "there is nothing wrong with me I'am just a little country girl, you guys are the ones with the sick problems!" never thought i would find myself doing the same things. my favorite when i was in my addiction was pain pills then it moved to cocaine and then i smoked crack a few times. but the drug dealers said they were going to look after me so they didnt want me smoking crack. i didnt understand all the sickness untill its too late. iam years clean now, but i had gotten hurt a year ago (horse related) and had some rough times with the pain plls. one bottle of pain pills is never enough.. i didnt know and realize this but this addiction started years ago even when i was little. my mom would tell me to go do some chores well i thought she didnt love me so i would go to the bathroom and take lotssss of aspirins!!!!!! and the story just goes from there to now. i was so into my pills i could not imagine being sobber for a minute i always say if you are smiling you must be high. i couldnt even imagine being happy and being sobber. but thank my God i can now. i've always said addiction is the Green Devil itself. alot of people look down and make fun of addicts but how many of us wake up and say " oh lets see when i grow up I want to be a addict?
I will close for now. We have a rodeo to get ready for. I wish you all the best of Luck and look forward to hearing from alot of good people.
Vicki Kay
Hi Vicki
and WELCOME to this board, there are lots of great people here who will have been through simular experiances. Enjoy your rodeo.....and keep comin back
Love
Gabbi
and WELCOME to this board, there are lots of great people here who will have been through simular experiances. Enjoy your rodeo.....and keep comin back
Love
Gabbi
Welcome to the board Vicki. This is a really good place to be.
Theres a girl on here who's really into horses too (cowgirl). She's really wise about recovery too. She's also a b**** because she just got back from Hawaii and didn't take me with her. Anyways, welcome, how long have you been clean?
Briar
Theres a girl on here who's really into horses too (cowgirl). She's really wise about recovery too. She's also a b**** because she just got back from Hawaii and didn't take me with her. Anyways, welcome, how long have you been clean?
Briar
Yeah, I mean't to say that cowgirl'd be a good one for ya to talk with.
Welcome Vicki..I am farely new here too, but this is the place for kindness and support..Kim
Welcome Vicki. Stick around there are some great people on this board who are wonderful recovery examples. Take care.
Rachel
Rachel
Hey Vicki! Welcome, I hope you can get alot of help and support here. I think you replyed on one of my posts that you were from La Belle also? I think you might be since you said (rodeo country) and La Belle is like "redneck paradise" lol
Punky...see that you found her. rodeogirl05@earthlink.net. Ya'll should get together. Sounds like she has been where you are and could really be a help to you! God sent you an angel.
Love, Carol
Hi Vicki. I am new here but have been fighting addiction many years and may have helpfull advice and definately would like to hear from anyone with similar problems. Recovery is so much easier if you have like minded people to talk to. Wish you all the best life has to offer.
P.s. I just read a great book called Dharma Punks that inspired me and am suggesting to anyone who has had problems with drugs to check it out.
much love.
the Kaptain.
A warm THANKS to all who welcomed me.
The rodeo was nice and long 2 days.
I have 3 boys 14, 16, & 19. my 16 rides bulls and my 19 is a bull fighter my 14 is a baseball nut.
they all have been a joy to raise and call my children, there were alot of times i didnt deserve them but i guess we all make mistakes.
my boys knew all about my addiction. and i also know everything happens for reasons so now because of my kids watching me go thru my addiction they wont even take a aspirin when they have headaches.
any how i wont go on thank you for your warm welcomes.
Vick ikay
The rodeo was nice and long 2 days.
I have 3 boys 14, 16, & 19. my 16 rides bulls and my 19 is a bull fighter my 14 is a baseball nut.
they all have been a joy to raise and call my children, there were alot of times i didnt deserve them but i guess we all make mistakes.
my boys knew all about my addiction. and i also know everything happens for reasons so now because of my kids watching me go thru my addiction they wont even take a aspirin when they have headaches.
any how i wont go on thank you for your warm welcomes.
Vick ikay
Hey Vicky, welcome to the board. I hope we all have the ability to help you on your journey! It's not easy but it is so worth it. Love, Kat
Hi I just wanted to say hello to everyone here also. I just joined about 15 minutes ago. I will be here a lot for your kind words. I am just in my early 20s and have stopped oxis for the third day now. I am looking for a good support system as only a few of my friends understand and not even my family knew I have an addiction, hopefully I can own up to it with my therapist but even with her I am embarrased. I was wondering if anyone knew how to help with the anxiety problems. Thank you so much and nice to meet you all.
Nice to meet you vicky..
kerry
kerry
Welcome Vicky, I look forward to getting to know you. Glad you came to the boared. We will all give you the support and friendhsip you need. Good luck and I hope we can help. Love, Kat
Welcome Greek, hope we can give you the support and comfort you need right now. It's always nice to see new faces. I hope you make yourself at home! Love, Kat
So glad you're here Vicky and Greek...
You're a girl after my own heart, Vicky...love the whole rodeo stuff. I did games this summer for the first time with my performance horse and had a ball.
Your story is so much like mine. I also have 3 boys although they are older than yours. I too have had a pain pill addiction for many years, more than I can count anymore. But I've got 9 months under my belt this time, the longest ever. How long have you been clean?
I look forward to talking to you both and offering whatever help, support and reasurance that I can.
And please, don't listen to Briar, I'm really not a b****, I just couldn't take her this time.
Cowgirl
You're a girl after my own heart, Vicky...love the whole rodeo stuff. I did games this summer for the first time with my performance horse and had a ball.
Your story is so much like mine. I also have 3 boys although they are older than yours. I too have had a pain pill addiction for many years, more than I can count anymore. But I've got 9 months under my belt this time, the longest ever. How long have you been clean?
I look forward to talking to you both and offering whatever help, support and reasurance that I can.
And please, don't listen to Briar, I'm really not a b****, I just couldn't take her this time.
Cowgirl
Welcome Vicki and Greek!
Vicki, one bottle was never enough for me either....we must be in the right place.
Greek, about the anxiety, some of that just seems to go along with the withdrawals. Some have found that Kava-Kava helps; some drinky chamomille tea. Sharing what's going on helps also. I found that it was a tremendous relief to get honest with at least one person about my pill use. Maybe that person is your therapist? There's a saying, "You're as sick as your secrets." A lot of anxiety was eased when i stopped trying to do this thing all on my own....Good luck, glad you're both here.
Vicki, one bottle was never enough for me either....we must be in the right place.
Greek, about the anxiety, some of that just seems to go along with the withdrawals. Some have found that Kava-Kava helps; some drinky chamomille tea. Sharing what's going on helps also. I found that it was a tremendous relief to get honest with at least one person about my pill use. Maybe that person is your therapist? There's a saying, "You're as sick as your secrets." A lot of anxiety was eased when i stopped trying to do this thing all on my own....Good luck, glad you're both here.
Welcome Vici sorry my welcome is late(early)I'm a early bird.Im Mollyjean ,I've been here since Nov 2004 and this board has helped me so much words can't say.My problem is/was pain pills also which it has been 22 days now.I started a detox treatment with suboxone and its helped alot.If I can help in anyway please ask.Yup I think you & cowgirl will have much in common.Take Care...mj
Vicki, WELCOME
You'll find many people with similar stories like yours.... that's what I love best; being able to talk to people and be honest and be able to relate to them.
I, too, have not really been sober since my teens (I am 32 now)..... A big problem for me is that I have a chemical imbalance (I am bipolar), so I'm always trying to self-medicate to correct that problem...... Most drugs were never really an addiction because I could take them or leave them, but pain pills just threw me for a loop! It's amazing how fast my body LOVED them, CRAVED them.... they were like my boyfriend, my best friend, my soul mate.....
None is right, though...... Secrets will eat away with you and make it all worse. Whenever I start lying to my husband, it just gnaws at me until I end up coming clean....
Good luck
You'll find many people with similar stories like yours.... that's what I love best; being able to talk to people and be honest and be able to relate to them.
I, too, have not really been sober since my teens (I am 32 now)..... A big problem for me is that I have a chemical imbalance (I am bipolar), so I'm always trying to self-medicate to correct that problem...... Most drugs were never really an addiction because I could take them or leave them, but pain pills just threw me for a loop! It's amazing how fast my body LOVED them, CRAVED them.... they were like my boyfriend, my best friend, my soul mate.....
None is right, though...... Secrets will eat away with you and make it all worse. Whenever I start lying to my husband, it just gnaws at me until I end up coming clean....
Good luck
Thank you to all and everyone for the warm welcome.
about the anziety i have delt with that for years and when i was coming off the drugs the anziety was out of the sky. for years people and therapist tried telling me about the breathing routine but see i wanted the narcotic medicines, at one time i was on 15 differ medicines and had to carry a purse to keep them all with me. but as the time goes by staying clean the anziety is not that big of deal and iam on 1 pill and not a narcotic.
for the ones that have asked i have been clean for 8 years off cocaine and pain pills but i have had 1 relapes from pain pills less then 1 yr ago (due to a horse accident)
i believe you should never forget where you come from. you go thru things like this to help others for when they go thru it. dont ever say "it wont happen to me" becasuse i said that too.
Vickikay
about the anziety i have delt with that for years and when i was coming off the drugs the anziety was out of the sky. for years people and therapist tried telling me about the breathing routine but see i wanted the narcotic medicines, at one time i was on 15 differ medicines and had to carry a purse to keep them all with me. but as the time goes by staying clean the anziety is not that big of deal and iam on 1 pill and not a narcotic.
for the ones that have asked i have been clean for 8 years off cocaine and pain pills but i have had 1 relapes from pain pills less then 1 yr ago (due to a horse accident)
i believe you should never forget where you come from. you go thru things like this to help others for when they go thru it. dont ever say "it wont happen to me" becasuse i said that too.
Vickikay
