Help Am Slowing Weaning On My Own Ne Help To Give?

General / Miscellaneous
1
I just need a little support right, I give advice often because my sister had a coke problem along with alcohol. She is dead now at the age of 26. I tried to help and get her a way from the dealer who hooked her on this mess. If she ran stops for him then the coke was free. My whole family suffered with this. Only I helped her hide it for a year before I broke my silence. I would physically go and get her from his house. I had a gun and so did he. I told him I was raised in the country and target practice on the tree and the marsh, I was and am pretty good shot.

I told him many times it was him or me, take your chance because I will. He never tried to intimadate me again. But he knew I would kill him for what he did 2 her for less than a quarter. My family is always worth fighting for. Don't get the wrong idea I am not a vigalante going for everyone. Just take precautions, people like him a big dealer had them and drugs to boot. It was worth the chance. When she was trying to get clean, someway the steering wheel let go and she came from what the police say about 60 2 70 miles per in to an large oak. It was over. But Michael her worst enemy even though she didn't know it got off scott free. He knows I still look for him, should let it go because revenge is not a healthy way to live. I have seen him at a distance 3 times since she died and he made it a point to leave the store, movie away from me. He lives in fear, I don't. God will prevail,even though he doesn't believe in killing. So I refrain and hope we r never alone.

Sorry for the long summary of why I can't let this go.

Pls any suggestions would helpful because angry is not healthy.

Help if u can. Please, Thanks for just at least reading this post. Just had to put it down and start trying to cope. I am on prescp now to contol alot of anxiety and depression.

Thanks, Kyra
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Sorry for whining, but just needs some support right now. Any support is appreciated.

Many thanks my friend.
Kyra
3
Hi Kyra-

Wow, I am so sorry for your loss. I can't even imagine. I can say that killing him won't change anything. It won't bring her back. Even though it might make you feel better to take his life, it won't be worth it in the long run. And I am sure your sister would not want you to do that. You sound like you believe in God. Pray. She is in heaven, a better place, a happy place with no worries. God will get vengence for you, just leave it up to Him. He will take care of everything. I know this is probably now what you want to hear right now, but it is the truth. I will pray for you. I wish I could say something to take away your pain. Stay strong and God Bless.
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StormyWaters,

Thank you so much for your reply. I know it is not sensible and that what goes around comes around or so I heard and in some cases believe. The pain is not bad some days but today for some reason it is awful. But xanex won't change the situation. I am trying to wean and have from 6mg to 4mg a day.

This board and people like u are a God send. I just needed 4 someone to hear me. U did that and it is so appreciated. No matter what I do it won't bring her back to me. Family of 6 kids I am #5 she was #6. So all of them still have a baby sister and I don't. Just seems so unfair. u r rignt just wait and let God handle this is a case of Let Go, Let God. Right???

Hope I hear from u again and I will be more positive.

Thank you (((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))
Kyra
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Kyra-

I do feel for you. Dealing with that while you are tapering off of xanax. You are entitled to some bad days, as many as you need. But the truth is that drugs won't make anything better, just worse. You are a very strong person. I know it seems unfair. Yes, let go and let God. Just know that she is in a better place. You know. Happy with no worries. I have heard that tapering off of benzo's is very hard. Congrats on getting down to 4 mg. That is wonderful.

I tried to find this post the other day, but I couldn't. I would have responded sooner.

I will pray for you. Stay strong and God Bless you.
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Thank for taking the time to fine me. I know I am stronger than I think I am. Your notes have been a big help for me. I know someone cares and i thank u for that. I will keep on trying to wean and get the strentgh to keep trying. U have been great.

Thank you and God Bless
Kyra
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Stormywaters,
still weaning hanging in there like my life depends on it. I guess it does huh!!!!
((((LOL)))) Hope u r well I have thought of u often.

Take Care, Love ya, Kyra