Help! I'm Overwhelmed

Me and my boyfriend broke up the day before his birthday in October and it hit me so hard that I almost took my own life. We only keep in touch because he owes me money. And I need the money desperately at this time in my life. But he acts like he doesn't even know me. Worst of all, he treats me badly (most of the time) when I try to communicate with him. I've known him for 10 years, we were together 2 years out of the ten. Slowly, but surely I have come to realize that he's been using more aggresively, and has now done everything except heroein. He's dry right now, and appears to be trying because he has a job, and has given me 3 payments so far. But the lack of communication, and the nasty attitude he gives me makes me want to forget the money and struggle harder to keep what I own without him, eventhough he is a big part of the reason I am in financial ruin. And after all the nasty and traumatic things he has done to me, I still love him, and would probably would take him back into my home, eventhough I imagine using the power of "no" in my mind, which I practice on a day to day basis. HELP!
I have only this to offer to you. What you are experiencing is not love. You will profit greatly by studying and reflecting on what love is. Love is not a feeling. Love is a decision, a committment and actions -- selfless, self-sacrificing actions. He is offerring you none of that. Make a clean break. Start over, and start fresh -- not with him. He does not have the capacity to love or to give freely of himself.
Bob is right. move on, dont look back.

If you are having trouble moving on, you could consider co-dependants anonymous.

And remember for the future, you should always love someone completely without needing them.