Hi everone,
I am going to work on the HP thing today. I rarely get on my knees in the morning and lately have not even said thank you at night. Usually at night I just silently scream "PLEASE HELP ME GOD".....it's not working.
So today I'll get on my knees, ask for help and guidance. I will try to be patient and kind instead of a raving lunatic. I'll grab my 24 hour book...if I can find it!
Change, change, change.
My goal today, pray, read, stay sober.
THANK YOU IDGIE, PREGNANTMOM AND VWGIRL. and everyone else out there! Have a great day.
You are welcome! Keep going back (to meetings)...sanity will be restored once you totally surrender and work Step 1. Admitted that you are powerless over alcohol and that your life has become manageable. I suggest you work on your physical sobriety, first things first, for the first 30 days; that's what my Sponsor did with me...I checked in with her everyday until I worked Step 5 with her. I might also suggest that you find a Sponsor, even if it's temporary. You may find another woman at the meetings you identify with...good job, hang in there. Remember you never have to feel that awful feeling again....trust the process, if you can't believe that you will get well, know that I believe and hold on to that. You can do this, you can!
Hammer I posted this in another thread for someone who was asking how to make cravings go away - thought you might find it helpful.
I can only give you my story (and I am in early stage recovery from alcohol myself).
All the million and 1 times I've tried to quit, including last week I craved alcohol like nothing else. It was all I thought about. I tried to keep being busy etc and eventually it failed, my will broke down and I had a drink.
This happened to me last wednesday. On thursday everything changed. Somehow in the midst of my hangover misery my cravings were taken away. I have not had a bad craving since then.
I've done lots of meditating, affirmations, visualisation all that stuff trying to break the addiction. Helped some but not enough.
I don't know what your personal beliefs are, but somehow I managed on that Thursday to turn my addiction over to my Higher Power. I can't really explain what happened but that's what I did and the cravings went away. Maybe they'll come back, who knows, but so far no cravings.
It wasn't a matter of praying (which I think in your posts you said you do) exactly. I more surrendered my alcoholism to my Higher Power, I sort of "gave it to God" in a way. Once I realised that I was not making a very good job of fixing this problem, I was more open to the concept of completely letting go of the problem and turning it over.
It doesn't mean that everything is suddenly better, I mean I will still have to work my recovery and do all the necessary things. But a big part of the minute by minute struggle is gone. I am not obsessing about alcohol all the time.
Something profound changed for me that day.
don't PRAY for the cravings to be taken away, GIVE them away. Give them to your Higher Power, that Power will know what to do with them. Surrender, let go, turn it over, admit there's nothing YOU the separate entity can do about them, and GIVE them over to that Higher power.
I hope this makes sense, cause I'm not at all convinced I understand myself, all I know is that one day I was craving as usual and the next day, (and subsequent days) I was not.
I can only give you my story (and I am in early stage recovery from alcohol myself).
All the million and 1 times I've tried to quit, including last week I craved alcohol like nothing else. It was all I thought about. I tried to keep being busy etc and eventually it failed, my will broke down and I had a drink.
This happened to me last wednesday. On thursday everything changed. Somehow in the midst of my hangover misery my cravings were taken away. I have not had a bad craving since then.
I've done lots of meditating, affirmations, visualisation all that stuff trying to break the addiction. Helped some but not enough.
I don't know what your personal beliefs are, but somehow I managed on that Thursday to turn my addiction over to my Higher Power. I can't really explain what happened but that's what I did and the cravings went away. Maybe they'll come back, who knows, but so far no cravings.
It wasn't a matter of praying (which I think in your posts you said you do) exactly. I more surrendered my alcoholism to my Higher Power, I sort of "gave it to God" in a way. Once I realised that I was not making a very good job of fixing this problem, I was more open to the concept of completely letting go of the problem and turning it over.
It doesn't mean that everything is suddenly better, I mean I will still have to work my recovery and do all the necessary things. But a big part of the minute by minute struggle is gone. I am not obsessing about alcohol all the time.
Something profound changed for me that day.
don't PRAY for the cravings to be taken away, GIVE them away. Give them to your Higher Power, that Power will know what to do with them. Surrender, let go, turn it over, admit there's nothing YOU the separate entity can do about them, and GIVE them over to that Higher power.
I hope this makes sense, cause I'm not at all convinced I understand myself, all I know is that one day I was craving as usual and the next day, (and subsequent days) I was not.
