I am trying to quit from my addiction but I am just failing, I am trying to get and sponsore to help me, last time it was my wife, but i am afraid to tell her, I know she would understand. I think she is thinking that i am already in a good track, but I want to tell her but at the same time I am scare to tell her because she will know that I fail, and that scare me that would said that I can not do it by my self.
I will see if tomorrow i can, I just want to wake up and thruw the medication but I am pretty sure thati will be looking for it running in my car very fast, desper to get it.
I hope tomorrow I will do it rigth.
Thanks.
hello again, the first thing i would do in fact, that i did do was to get rid iof all the medication. hiding it from yourself is pointless, you will find it and use it. as far as a sponser are there na meetings in your area? that would be the place to obtain one. you sound like you are ready to take a step. what are your medications and where do you get them. is your dr aware of your habit? the reason i am asking is there a way you can safely medically detox or are you doing it at home? could you please post more about your situation.
take care
carol
take care
carol
Hey there, thanks for posting.
I know how you feel, if I'd had a bottle of pills in my car during week one I would have folded in, like, miliseconds.
But you have a choice. You've got a certain amount of strength and reasonability inside you telling you to post here, telling you that you want to do the right thing, telling you that you've got to stop your addiction. Everyone here has felt that, too, and that's why we're here posting our success stories. It seems so impossible, so freakin' hard, but the truth is that everyone is RIGHT! It does pass, as stupid and lame as that sounds coming from some computer forum, I garuntee that if you give it a try you'll see for yourself. And then you can come back here and post in topics like this, and help other people. I've agreed that that's the best therapy, know what I mean?
Keep posting, everthings going to be ok. Give it a try, it's not the end, it's the very best of the beginning.
I know how you feel, if I'd had a bottle of pills in my car during week one I would have folded in, like, miliseconds.
But you have a choice. You've got a certain amount of strength and reasonability inside you telling you to post here, telling you that you want to do the right thing, telling you that you've got to stop your addiction. Everyone here has felt that, too, and that's why we're here posting our success stories. It seems so impossible, so freakin' hard, but the truth is that everyone is RIGHT! It does pass, as stupid and lame as that sounds coming from some computer forum, I garuntee that if you give it a try you'll see for yourself. And then you can come back here and post in topics like this, and help other people. I've agreed that that's the best therapy, know what I mean?
Keep posting, everthings going to be ok. Give it a try, it's not the end, it's the very best of the beginning.
hello, im kimber.i am 2 months clean of lortabs.welcome to the board.i would get the meds out of the house first,then talk with your wife.honesty is so vital for recovery. you will find much support here, keep us updated.kimber:)
Hi there cute you sound very much like i did when i first started my trek to recovery i wanted to be clean desperatly but had no idea how to go about it or would i last etc. i think maybe a little positivity would not go a miss hun try to stop thinking about what if i fail and change that to when im clean. Telling your wife seems hard for you because you feel you have let her down but to be honest the only person that matters right now is you ok a tad selfish but its what we need to do concentrate on ourselfs just for a while, i would try explaining things to her get, information on addiciton, let her help you help yourself, if she is unable for very right reasons then go all out to make sure you have support. I also think reading here will make you decided on making that change. wishing you luck (((((((hugs))))))))) jackie xxxxxxxxx
Ivsubcute.....
I remember when you joined and started posted. You were freaked about wds and you weaned yourself down to the tiniest amount and the did the big flush....
I remember you writing of your wife and how much help she was to you. Go back and read your words they are on here somewhere, find what you had then and bring it into focus....
You can do this again. One day at a time, and you will get it done....
Take care,
Tina
I remember when you joined and started posted. You were freaked about wds and you weaned yourself down to the tiniest amount and the did the big flush....
I remember you writing of your wife and how much help she was to you. Go back and read your words they are on here somewhere, find what you had then and bring it into focus....
You can do this again. One day at a time, and you will get it done....
Take care,
Tina
I know exactly how you feel. I am at the stage where I would like to quit, I have cut down, but I think it's probably because I don't want to run out of pills. I'm struggling with the feeling that I am sick, I do know that. Alot of people on this board understand how we feel. When do we know when we are really ready that's my BIG question. I have admitted to having a problem, just wanting the courage to do something about it. I want to tell my husband, but I am afraid he will not understand so I know what that's like also. We have struggled with addiction in the past because of my Mother and Father dying, I couldn't handle it. Sometimes I think I still can't handle it. Maybe I never really was clean, just exchanged one addiction for another I honestly don't know. After my husbands father died, my husband had a nervous breakdown and got into some trouble and went to jail for 3 years. This is when I took my fall and when I started using vicodin. Maybe that's one of the reasons I started relying on it so much, I am just trying to figure things out. I hope you get the answers you are looking for and the help you need. Let me know if you need to talk, I totally understand.
Thanks everyone this make me more stronge.
tropical1 I am trying to do it at home.In my situation I do not have a problem to get the medication, I live close to Mexico and is easy to get it. I do not have any doctor that prescrive it to me, I just go and get the medication in the pharm.
Wascky jasky: I do want to tell my wife but I don't want her to be worry, remmember long time ago that I really try hard and she stay at home for me to help me, I did have the medication at home but she knew where it was, suppostly because I was scare about the withdrawn, that it was like i was having a cold. and she encourage me to be stronge, but today is different,she is working I am on vacation and I don't want her to be worry.
Mistyeyes : I amtrying to look , my past post but I could not find them.I will look for them againd:
Kimber : if I have the medication at home even if I don't use it, I feel more safe,I am scare to throw the meds and the later fail and be looking for the medication everywhere on the street.I am really scare of that.But I know is the only way to be cure.
Westwind: Caming back to this forum, is the way that keep me out of been thinking about the medication that's way I am here because it help me a lot last time.
tropical1 I am trying to do it at home.In my situation I do not have a problem to get the medication, I live close to Mexico and is easy to get it. I do not have any doctor that prescrive it to me, I just go and get the medication in the pharm.
Wascky jasky: I do want to tell my wife but I don't want her to be worry, remmember long time ago that I really try hard and she stay at home for me to help me, I did have the medication at home but she knew where it was, suppostly because I was scare about the withdrawn, that it was like i was having a cold. and she encourage me to be stronge, but today is different,she is working I am on vacation and I don't want her to be worry.
Mistyeyes : I amtrying to look , my past post but I could not find them.I will look for them againd:
Kimber : if I have the medication at home even if I don't use it, I feel more safe,I am scare to throw the meds and the later fail and be looking for the medication everywhere on the street.I am really scare of that.But I know is the only way to be cure.
Westwind: Caming back to this forum, is the way that keep me out of been thinking about the medication that's way I am here because it help me a lot last time.
Welcome back ivsubcute. I understand not wanting to tell your spouse, at the same time we get married to share and support eachother in good times and bad. Give it a thought - the suport and compassion will help you on this journey.
Oh man, living so near to the border...that's gotta be brutal! The pills are so close. Ya know, it's frequently said that addicts move to get away from their addiction, only thing is the addiction just follows them wherever they go. But in your case, if you could move....
Or, if not, can you get to NA/AA meetings?
Jim
Oh man, living so near to the border...that's gotta be brutal! The pills are so close. Ya know, it's frequently said that addicts move to get away from their addiction, only thing is the addiction just follows them wherever they go. But in your case, if you could move....
Or, if not, can you get to NA/AA meetings?
Jim
all my life i spent running from my problems only to find out that no matter how fast i ran i could never outrun myself.
Hi there, I'm 41 days clean, so it hasn't been that long. I would tell your wife, because I'm sure she loves you and yes you made a mistake again, but I'm sure by now she knows how easy it is to do that. If you can't flush them, give them all to her, let her keep them, take them to work and only leave what you need for that day. I don't think we give our spouses enough credit when it comes to this. I was scared to tell my husband because he is "Mr. goody two-shoes" but he was very supportive and understanding. I think you will be surprised by telling her. Just my suggestion.
41 days is a long time, Donna. It's longer than what you had 41 days ago.. how profound was that? lol
I didn't tell my husband about my last relapse a year ago..didn't want to rock the boat. He is one of the "normies" and just doesn't get it. He loves me and wants nothing but the best for me but he thinks I'm cured and often wonders why I still go to meetings and call my sponser every day. He has no clue when it comes to the ins and outs of this disease. He even went to the family portion of the treatment... maybe he was absent the day they talked about it being a life long struggle. It surely is a family disease.
Will I ever tell him? Probably not and that's something I have to live with. I hate the deception, but I'm unwilling at this point to shift the balance in his life that he thinks is so perfect...
cg
I didn't tell my husband about my last relapse a year ago..didn't want to rock the boat. He is one of the "normies" and just doesn't get it. He loves me and wants nothing but the best for me but he thinks I'm cured and often wonders why I still go to meetings and call my sponser every day. He has no clue when it comes to the ins and outs of this disease. He even went to the family portion of the treatment... maybe he was absent the day they talked about it being a life long struggle. It surely is a family disease.
Will I ever tell him? Probably not and that's something I have to live with. I hate the deception, but I'm unwilling at this point to shift the balance in his life that he thinks is so perfect...
cg
ivsubcute,
I was reading your post.
Im confused. You think its better to lie to your wife? and live a lie behind her back and live with the guilt of lieing to them each and everyday verses telling them the truth that your a drug addict and you need help.
Seems like a pretty easy solution to me. Swallow your pride and put your ego in check. Spill the beans and start to get help or support. Unless you like living a constant lie....
Your choice... I had the same senario and I told my parents everything. Boy did I ever feel better.. It was a start and now im hitting 240 clean days.
I was reading your post.
Im confused. You think its better to lie to your wife? and live a lie behind her back and live with the guilt of lieing to them each and everyday verses telling them the truth that your a drug addict and you need help.
Seems like a pretty easy solution to me. Swallow your pride and put your ego in check. Spill the beans and start to get help or support. Unless you like living a constant lie....
Your choice... I had the same senario and I told my parents everything. Boy did I ever feel better.. It was a start and now im hitting 240 clean days.
I hope this works.....
Here you go your posts.....
http://addictionrecoveryguide.com/m...22&hl=ivsubcute
http://addictionrecoveryguide.com/m...95&hl=ivsubcute
http://addictionrecoveryguide.com/m...50&hl=ivsubcute
http://addictionrecoveryguide.com/m...72&hl=ivsubcute
http://addictionrecoveryguide.com/m...15&hl=ivsubcute
http://addictionrecoveryguide.com/m...91&hl=ivsubcute
http://addictionrecoveryguide.com/m...77&hl=ivsubcute
http://addictionrecoveryguide.com/m...22&hl=ivsubcute
Here you go your posts.....
http://addictionrecoveryguide.com/m...22&hl=ivsubcute
http://addictionrecoveryguide.com/m...95&hl=ivsubcute
http://addictionrecoveryguide.com/m...50&hl=ivsubcute
http://addictionrecoveryguide.com/m...72&hl=ivsubcute
http://addictionrecoveryguide.com/m...15&hl=ivsubcute
http://addictionrecoveryguide.com/m...91&hl=ivsubcute
http://addictionrecoveryguide.com/m...77&hl=ivsubcute
http://addictionrecoveryguide.com/m...22&hl=ivsubcute
The same could be said for me, Kiwi. I lie to my husband and to myself every day out of fear. I also need to quit hiding behind it but don't know how... it is so hard to be human.
xxx
cg
xxx
cg
Cowgirl, something isn't right and it isn't the insanity that has been going on here...it is just something I don't know, but you got me worried.....
Take care ok.....
Love,
Tina
Take care ok.....
Love,
Tina
Hi cute well i must apoligise i got it worng, but i still feel that in your situ you will be better off releasing the emotion of a relapse. jackie xxxxxxxx
It's ok Misty..just the usual, who can we pick on today crap.
I'm ok, just learning lots about myself. Somethings I like, others I hate and need to change. Not telling my husband about my relapse a year ago is one of them.
Anytime you want to talk, my email is at the bottom. I can tell you everything you want to know..
Love
Cowgirl
I'm ok, just learning lots about myself. Somethings I like, others I hate and need to change. Not telling my husband about my relapse a year ago is one of them.
Anytime you want to talk, my email is at the bottom. I can tell you everything you want to know..
Love
Cowgirl
Ivs-There is not one answer that fits all concerning "coming clean" to your spouse or loved ones.When it works,its great.It can also have the opposite effect.However,trying to do this alone is tough.Is there anyone else you can open up with? Have you ever considered going to meetings?A lot of people find a great support group there from people who understand.
Keeping pills around is the biggest set-up in the world.Even if you live close to the border,you still have some work to do to get there.When they are in you car or house,its just too easy.
Your addiction will also create all these senarios that keep giving you excuses why you cant stop.Sometimes,you just have to say F*** it, Im doing this.When the pain of using outweighs the pain of getting clean, you will do it.
good luck to ya.
Keeping pills around is the biggest set-up in the world.Even if you live close to the border,you still have some work to do to get there.When they are in you car or house,its just too easy.
Your addiction will also create all these senarios that keep giving you excuses why you cant stop.Sometimes,you just have to say F*** it, Im doing this.When the pain of using outweighs the pain of getting clean, you will do it.
good luck to ya.
