I am the 37 year old mother of 2 teenage children and i'm addicted to oxycontin. I hate the person i've become. I've lost my job, because i won't get out of bed, i spend most of my days and nights in my bedroom, because i don't want to be around anyone. Oxycontin makes me feel good, gives me energy, and helps me deal with my everyday problems. Sometimes, I say, I can't believe this happened to me. In October of 2006, I lost the father of my children, he overdosed on oxycontin, he was an iv drug user and always used street drugs, the first time he used oxycontin, he didn't know what he was doing and killed himself. I am not an iv drug user, i take the oxy's orally, but have made my life a living hell because of them. I am going into treatment on the 12th of next month and pray to God I can get the help I truly need. If there's anyone out there who can give me any advice, I can sure use it. May God Bless and give all the other addicts out there the strength they need.
You write:
i spend most of my days and nights in my bedroom, because i don't want to be around anyone. Oxycontin makes me feel good, gives me energy, and helps me deal with my everyday problems .
That is it right there that is why they are a living hell. You don't know if your comming or going I have been there hun...I am glad you are going to treatment you have made the right choice. What are you doing from now till then?
jane
i spend most of my days and nights in my bedroom, because i don't want to be around anyone. Oxycontin makes me feel good, gives me energy, and helps me deal with my everyday problems .
That is it right there that is why they are a living hell. You don't know if your comming or going I have been there hun...I am glad you are going to treatment you have made the right choice. What are you doing from now till then?
jane
welcome to the board.
i'm a vicodin addict.
funny you mention "i spend most of my days and nights in my bedroom, because i don't want to be around anyone. Oxycontin makes me feel good, gives me energy, and helps me deal with my everyday problems" sounds like an oxymoron. that's what sucks about opiates.
i'm so sorry to hear about your loss. i dated a hardcore drug user for 3 years. we are no longer together, but i started to use shortly after our relationship ended. i never used when we were together. weird,huh.
you admitted you have a problem. i admit it, too.
how much are you taking. how often?
are you doing this alone?
you found an amazing place...filled with inspiring people. read some threads ... type in oxycontin down below to find even more threads.
xoxoxoxoxo
i'm a vicodin addict.
funny you mention "i spend most of my days and nights in my bedroom, because i don't want to be around anyone. Oxycontin makes me feel good, gives me energy, and helps me deal with my everyday problems" sounds like an oxymoron. that's what sucks about opiates.
i'm so sorry to hear about your loss. i dated a hardcore drug user for 3 years. we are no longer together, but i started to use shortly after our relationship ended. i never used when we were together. weird,huh.
you admitted you have a problem. i admit it, too.
how much are you taking. how often?
are you doing this alone?
you found an amazing place...filled with inspiring people. read some threads ... type in oxycontin down below to find even more threads.
xoxoxoxoxo
ps- oxymoron could easily be taken out of context!!! (lol!)
not to mean oxy-moron ... but the actual definition in the dictionary.
like parting is such "sweet-sorrow". two opposites in one sentence.
sorry!
not to mean oxy-moron ... but the actual definition in the dictionary.
like parting is such "sweet-sorrow". two opposites in one sentence.
sorry!
Welcome A2O:
Sounds like you are sick and tired and afraid...There is a woman who posts here; Shantel who was also addicted to oxycontin...Maybe she will be on later and will speak to you...You sound like you are ready to make some changes in your life...Keep posting and asking questions...it does truly help...
So sorry about your loss...so sad...
Jan
Sounds like you are sick and tired and afraid...There is a woman who posts here; Shantel who was also addicted to oxycontin...Maybe she will be on later and will speak to you...You sound like you are ready to make some changes in your life...Keep posting and asking questions...it does truly help...
So sorry about your loss...so sad...
Jan
My heart goes out to you. I've been there and it is a scarey feeling. You are doing the right thing for you and your kids. I found rehab to be a very comforting place and not as bad as I thought it would be. Do you know how long you'll be there? You and your family are in my prayers.
Shelly
Shelly
Hey there!
I am very glad you found this board, and you will find that people will greet you with open arms.
I am a 23 yr old mom of a 2 year old. I got addicted to oxycodone for 2 years. Was taking a fairly high amount, and would go through running out...withdrawl... constantly. I couldn't even go to the store unless i had some pills cause it wouldn't be "fun".
I have finally been 5 Months Clean TODAY!!! (through the help of sub) and it feels so good.
You will get there. You are doing all the right things and I pray that you get the help you need as well.
Welcome,
stac
I am very glad you found this board, and you will find that people will greet you with open arms.
I am a 23 yr old mom of a 2 year old. I got addicted to oxycodone for 2 years. Was taking a fairly high amount, and would go through running out...withdrawl... constantly. I couldn't even go to the store unless i had some pills cause it wouldn't be "fun".
I have finally been 5 Months Clean TODAY!!! (through the help of sub) and it feels so good.
You will get there. You are doing all the right things and I pray that you get the help you need as well.
Welcome,
stac
Stacey,
I know your thread was removed the other day but I hope you got a chance to read my post before it was removed. I just want to say conragulations on five months. I know your husband and little girl must be so proud of you!
Shelly
I know your thread was removed the other day but I hope you got a chance to read my post before it was removed. I just want to say conragulations on five months. I know your husband and little girl must be so proud of you!
Shelly
I still have about 2 weeks until I go to treatment, and the last two days have been a living hell. I can't sleep at all, I either cry all the time or feel like i want to cry all the time. I can't stand to be around anyone, they get on my nerves so bad, I just want to rip their head off. I feel like I'm sinking in such a deep depression, that i'll never get out, and now i'm beginning to wonder if treatment will even help me. Is this the devil trying to convince me to stay on the pills, or what the hell is going on. I really feel like i'm losing my mind. Can somebody help me out, and tell me why my world feels like it's caving in on me all of the sudden. It kind of feels like i'm surrounded by death, or death is knocking at my door. I don't know, it's so hard to explain. I just wish I could figure it out, it's about to drive me crazy.
So you are in withdrawal? Have you ever been in withdrawal before? Oxy withdrawal is the closest to hell on earth I know of personally. This is probably not going to be a popular suggestion, but you may want to keep using if you can until it is time to go into treatment, taking as little as you can to get through. It does not mean that you are weak or doing anything wrong. Of course, if you are prepared to ride out the storm you are in now, you can. It won't kill you. Whenever I have gone into treatment they've told me to just keep doing what I'm doing with the pills, maybe try to cut down, until I get there. Did someone advise you to go cold turkey off the pills?
I hate that you are going through this alone and unprepared.
I hate that you are going through this alone and unprepared.
Have you gotten the otc medications for wds they really helped me the first w/ds I did with nothing and then the second time I got on with all the detoxifiers and gaba for stress management and adrenal gland support because we addicts really have screwed our systems up. I also have wellbutrin only a ten day supply and I won't get it after that but I thought it would help me get thru the roughest stuff, I know I am going to have the sweats tonight and that damn restless leg syndrome which I hate. I am also going in for microdermabrasion since I have aged from taking these drugs. Funny thing is I just turned forty Yikes but people have always thought I looked much younger in fact two months ago I was proofed at the liquor store, can you believe it. But I know I don't have much more time left I either quit taking them or quit my life. I have been in the house for the past three months not doing much outside stuff, yes I do get depressed in the winter generally but I start staying in the house because I don't want to do my mommy and me classes with my 3 year old because it would interfer with my buzz sick sick sick. Hang in there this is obtainable I just need the support as do you
Roxy
Roxy
I'm still using, if i went cold turkey, i'd probably rip my head off. But i'm still feeling like total s***. I've been trying to use percacet instead of oxycontin thinking it would be better for me, which i know neither one is good for me. Maybe that's why I feel so bad. I just feel sick to my stomach, have this awful taste in my mouth, having the restless leg syndrom s***, and basically feel like s***. I want to do something, like get out of bed, but have no ambition to do anything.
A2O, You still around? I'm up for awhile if you need to talk. How long have you been taking oxys? I was addicted to oxycodones and oxycontin for 5 years. Went c/t in Jan. 2006. Restless legs I feel your pain. I was diagnosed with RLS even before I went c/t. My doctor put me on Ambien for that to help me sleep but I got addicted to that to. I found hot baths, walking around and my husband messaging my legs to help some after I got off the Ambien. Hang in there. Shantel
I'm still here. I just feel like i'm losing my mind, and i'm still taking the pills. Do you think it's becaus I haven't taken an oxy for 4 or 5 days and have been taken the percacets. I thought maybe I could go to the percacets and slowly go off them but i'm taking 4 or 5 of them a day and was only taking 1 oxy a day. This depression is like a living hell. I've lived with depression before, but never this bad. I feel like i'm sinking deeper and deeper everyday. I was gonna wait and do the medical detox right before i went to treatment, but now im thinking i should maybe go ahead and do the med. detox. but i don't go to treatment till the 12th and i'm afraid i'll use between the time i get out of med detox and the time i go to treatment. I think i can be strong enough, but if i get home and the pain starts, i know i'll start using again. I've been alternating between the oxycontin and the percacets for about a year now. addicted2oxy
How long have you been on Oxys? Shantel
How long will you be in treatment for? The reason I ask is because some places keep you 5-7 days which is basically just a detox. Other places keep you 21-28 days or longer. I went to the detox kind. I wish there was a place around where I live that I could have stayed a month or so. I think that would have been so much more helpful. I am clean now but it was a rough road getting here. Unfortunatly I made the decision to go on methadone to get off lortabs. That was a huge mistake. I hear suboxone is a much better alternative. Anyway, I know you are anxious and uncertain right now but I just know you are going to feel so much better after you get into treatment. You will be helping yourself and your children so much. You are doing the right thing. Praying for you.
Shelly
Shelly
Shelly, Just posted to you on your thread. Good luck to you on Thursday. Shantel
The treatment center i'm going to is for 30 days.
I been on the oxys about a year, going back and forth from them to the percacets. You know I used to work in a mens treatment center and couldn't figure out how they got so hooked on drugs. Well, now i see. I guess maybe that's what I get for questioning their addiction.
Oxy;s are scary, that is all there is to it, they either kill you slowly or quickly. That was my DOC and quiting seemed impossible but, i am clean which is something i thought would NEVER happen. I remember looking at a calendar(alone in my room, like everyday using) and just looking ahead a week and st thinking that i wasnt going to make it to that week and it sucked, and i think it is such a miracle to be away from all that. You just cant let them get to your head......or your heart. Good luck, i didnt do treatment, but you will be in my prayers and thoughts. Just stick to it and do it day by day, and remember this too shall pass.
pants
pants
