I just got back from a meeting. I took this newcomer who has all the answers. No car, facing eviction, fired from her job but she has all the answers. It was exhausting. She doesn't want to go into a Recovery Home and is pissed that my friends and I are suggesting that this may be her only option. Listening to all of these hairbrain excuses has made me very grateful. Grateful that I am not delusional. She doesn't understand why the guy she hooked up with at the meeting isn't paying for her car to be repaired. Willing? Not one bit. I guess the only thing I can do is drive her to meetings. Mind you folks, she was sober for a few years at one time. It only gets worse, never better. Thanks for the vent...
Rachel
Smile...
I had all the answers once too.
Geeze.
Thanks for sharing that Rach.
xxx
CG
I had all the answers once too.
Geeze.
Thanks for sharing that Rach.
xxx
CG
Just keep in mind, they only stay mad till the see the light! and god will reward everyone for their good deeds! Keep your chin up, we all have to vent to someone. thats why we are here!
CG:
She is so tore up, it's sad. I have to pray for her. The insanity is shocking. I haven't seen this scale of denial and coo coo in awhile. I knew her from when I was sober before. I will just pray she gets the gift of willingness.
Rachel
you did a good thing by taking her to a meeting...talk about willingness! the most dependable quality in the universe is that of change. a willingness to change eliminates the word failure from our vocabulary. your willingness to carry the message of recovery to those who are still suffering is evident of your HP's higher ideas pouring through your higher consciousness.
i remember being like her, as you described. it's her journey rach - just like it has been yours and mine. all any of us can share is our own e, s, & h. if someone else happens to hear something that is of benefit of that e, s, & h, then thank you God.
i'm beyond being grateful for the people just like you - who have walked this path before me and were there when i became willing. i just don't think there's a word to express the gratitude i feel; 'cuz i remember rach - for a long, long time, i didn't want what any of "you" people had to suggest - nada! zilch! nothing!...however, oddly as it may have seemed, i always found that i kept going back.
God always does for me when i cannot do for myself.
much love & light to you, my friend -
sammy
i remember being like her, as you described. it's her journey rach - just like it has been yours and mine. all any of us can share is our own e, s, & h. if someone else happens to hear something that is of benefit of that e, s, & h, then thank you God.
i'm beyond being grateful for the people just like you - who have walked this path before me and were there when i became willing. i just don't think there's a word to express the gratitude i feel; 'cuz i remember rach - for a long, long time, i didn't want what any of "you" people had to suggest - nada! zilch! nothing!...however, oddly as it may have seemed, i always found that i kept going back.
God always does for me when i cannot do for myself.
much love & light to you, my friend -
sammy
Rachel, I think the condition of denial you speak of runs rampant in most addicts, at least in the beginning. I see it all around me. I just off the phone with one. I no longer say anything, just try to get away as quickly as I can. It does me no good, and as we all know, people are not going to change until they want to change. At least your girl was at a meeing, that says something for her. There may be hope.
In the meanwhile, all we can do is pray for them, and their families.
In the meanwhile, all we can do is pray for them, and their families.
Thanks :-) I woke up at 5:00 to my garage door opening and closing itself. It's still doing that. Arrgghh.
Last night and yesterday really affected me being with this new girl. Listening to the bulls*** is really hard for me.
Rachel
I know how you feel Rachel...i have a girl that I consider to be a friend, we met in rehab, BUT she is still smoking crack, so I avoid her....I wish I could do something to help, but it's one drowning man rescuing another....it's too bad, because I could really use some clean friends, till I find some, i'd much rather be alone.
That garage door thing would be getting on my nerves too...lol
That garage door thing would be getting on my nerves too...lol
The BS gets harder and harder to listen to. But part of the program teaches us to give back what we have been given and that's what you are so good at. If we walk away, we'll never know if we could have made a difference.
Some are lost souls and we'll never reach them, but we have to try.
I know how much this weared on you....I'm so proud of you.
Love
Lisa
Some are lost souls and we'll never reach them, but we have to try.
I know how much this weared on you....I'm so proud of you.
Love
Lisa
Hey Rachel,
Once upon a time there was this little boy who was addicted to pills and other drugs. He was full of fear, loneliness, hopelessness, despair, desperation, remorse, guilt, shame, and many other ugly feelings. He knew he had a problem, but didn't know what to do about it. One night, on the end of the third week of a run that had started out as "just one" and had progressed to almost double the amount he had used previously, he stumbled across a messageboard and asked for help. A beautiful angel reached out to him, told him it would be ok, told him about recovery, and gave him the name of a doctor who could help him. She checked in with him every day, and continued to promise him that it would be ok, that he could put down the drugs and pick up his life.
That scared little boy swallowed his last pill 5 months ago today. He's been to at least one meeting for every day he's been clean. He has a sponsor who is teaching him not just how to work the steps, but how to live them. He has gotten his career back on track. He's reached out to newcomers and has been told that he inspired someone to keep coming back. That scared little boy isn't so scared anymore, and he's now a recovering addict, not an active one.
No one can "get" recovery for us. No one can make us willing. As recovering addicts, we attract, not promote. Don't let another addict's unwillingness damper your efforts to help others... you never know when, or where, you're going to meet someone wants what you have, but has no idea how to get it.
Thanks for responding to my post last May, and for breathing life into my soul.
Love,
Matt
Once upon a time there was this little boy who was addicted to pills and other drugs. He was full of fear, loneliness, hopelessness, despair, desperation, remorse, guilt, shame, and many other ugly feelings. He knew he had a problem, but didn't know what to do about it. One night, on the end of the third week of a run that had started out as "just one" and had progressed to almost double the amount he had used previously, he stumbled across a messageboard and asked for help. A beautiful angel reached out to him, told him it would be ok, told him about recovery, and gave him the name of a doctor who could help him. She checked in with him every day, and continued to promise him that it would be ok, that he could put down the drugs and pick up his life.
That scared little boy swallowed his last pill 5 months ago today. He's been to at least one meeting for every day he's been clean. He has a sponsor who is teaching him not just how to work the steps, but how to live them. He has gotten his career back on track. He's reached out to newcomers and has been told that he inspired someone to keep coming back. That scared little boy isn't so scared anymore, and he's now a recovering addict, not an active one.
No one can "get" recovery for us. No one can make us willing. As recovering addicts, we attract, not promote. Don't let another addict's unwillingness damper your efforts to help others... you never know when, or where, you're going to meet someone wants what you have, but has no idea how to get it.
Thanks for responding to my post last May, and for breathing life into my soul.
Love,
Matt
I have to remember that some are sicker than others. The good news is, the people she knows all work strong programs and everyone is pointing her in the same direction. Her family will not help her anymore. There is no other choice. She keeps saying how she doesn't need a Recovery Home, she needs her car so she can get a job. The fact is, the way she looks, she is not going to be easily employed. It's just so sad.
Rachel
Matt:
You continually make me smile :-)
Matt...congratulations on 5 Months....wooo hooo!
Matt...that brought tears. And a big smile.
Isn't she wonderful?
xxx
CG
Isn't she wonderful?
xxx
CG
CG,
Yes she is. And there's nothing wrong with reminding her!
Love
Matt
Yes she is. And there's nothing wrong with reminding her!
Love
Matt
Matt, it brought tears to my eyes, too. I love Rachel, and I am so happy she was here when you needed her. Doesn't surprize me at all that she did all of that to help you. And you get a lot of credit for listening to her, also.
Congrats on 5 months. Awesome!
Your exhausted because you haven't stopped dancing for three days. he-he
Thanks for sharing that Rachel and being so willing to help her.Hopefully if the body keeps going to the meetings maybe the mind will follow.12th step work is really about us.Its just one more affirmation to help us stay clean.
Its hard not to get pissed off at them when they wont listen.Keep helping her unless at some point it starts effecting your sobriety....in a very negative way.
The next thing will be wanting to borrow money.LOL, unless thats already happened.
good luck
BTW-Congratulations Matt.
Its hard not to get pissed off at them when they wont listen.Keep helping her unless at some point it starts effecting your sobriety....in a very negative way.
The next thing will be wanting to borrow money.LOL, unless thats already happened.
good luck
BTW-Congratulations Matt.
Dear Rachel,
I can't imagine the frustration you must be encountering; however, your good deeds will definitely be recognized.
As cowgirl said, we all thought we had the answers once. Thanks for being a great inspiration to your friend. And to all of us, too!
Ben
I can't imagine the frustration you must be encountering; however, your good deeds will definitely be recognized.
As cowgirl said, we all thought we had the answers once. Thanks for being a great inspiration to your friend. And to all of us, too!
Ben
BENDER!!!!!
How are you my friend? How is school?
Love
Cowgirl
How are you my friend? How is school?
Love
Cowgirl
