Most of you know what happened to me over the weekend! My "fiancee" picked up most of his things yesterday, and has more to pick up. Anyway, I have been clean from oxy's 62? days now, can you believe I forget???? During this time, my fiancee was still using them. Everyday was a horrendous battle of will, especially during my w/d's, oh gosh how I wanted to take about 4, and feel great! But I didn't, and everyday I battled with the notion that they were in the bedroom, in a lock box, but I knew where he hid the key. Then I would think NO, I am not going to get on that board, to write a "I slipped" post, I did that once and it broke my heart. Over the weekend, when the final straw was going on, my closest supporters gave me the most wonderful advice, I didn't know if he should stay or go, but after reading the encouraging words, I decided that to stay clean and alive, he should go. If he were still here, I think someday I would have slipped, and maybe one time took too many, ya know? I might not be here if it weren't for you here, and I just want to say thank you for saving me, I love you all. Kim
Dear sweet kim as one of the people who was reading your post this weekend I must say how proud I am of you.You seem so comitted to being & living sober.How great for you how great for your whole life.I know that you may have some stuggles in front of you.I was a single mom for so long it sucks.But it doesnt suck as bad as loving someone who takes & takes & is not good or healthy for you.Please know that I will try to be here for you as much as I can & if ever you need something that I can help with I will.
I think you are very very brave & I hope you feel stronger & stronger each day..Take care....mj
I think you are very very brave & I hope you feel stronger & stronger each day..Take care....mj
You are to be commended for your strength, my humble opinion is that you made the right decision.
I feel too, that I will be making the same decision very shortly...this board has helped me tremendously.
My Best To You,
Dolly
I feel too, that I will be making the same decision very shortly...this board has helped me tremendously.
My Best To You,
Dolly
Hello dolly Im sorry to hear your almost in the same boat.Addiction is lonely enough without having to feel like your living with a negitive force as far as getting sober.
When I first came here to the board I gotta say...My BF is one of the most supportive people I know but beings he doesnt have a drug problem there was only so much he could understand.It feels good to come here & know that others have felt the same way.I always said that there is strenght in numbers so I feel the more people I have in my life that want the same as me (to live sober)the better my chances are that I can do this.....anyways welcome...mj
When I first came here to the board I gotta say...My BF is one of the most supportive people I know but beings he doesnt have a drug problem there was only so much he could understand.It feels good to come here & know that others have felt the same way.I always said that there is strenght in numbers so I feel the more people I have in my life that want the same as me (to live sober)the better my chances are that I can do this.....anyways welcome...mj
Kim,
I'm glad we were able to be here for you to bounce things off of, but you are the one that makes the executive decisions in your life. All of this is you. Your strenght has pulled you and your kids through this. You should be very proud of yourself, I know I am.
Stay strong Kim, you're doing the right thing.
Redd
Kim:
I have seen you come along way. You sound much stronger and sure about things these days. I cant imagine going through a breakup right now. God, I will pray for you.
It is incredible that you love yourself enough to rid yourself of anything that may affect your cleanliness. You love yourself enough to let a major pillar in your life go and be ok with it. I commend you. Very impressed and Im not easily impressed, I assure you.
I will pray you have no lonliness and on a lighter note.... men are like buses, another one will be along every 15 minutes. The next one may be the love of your life! That is an exciting thought.
I have seen you come along way. You sound much stronger and sure about things these days. I cant imagine going through a breakup right now. God, I will pray for you.
It is incredible that you love yourself enough to rid yourself of anything that may affect your cleanliness. You love yourself enough to let a major pillar in your life go and be ok with it. I commend you. Very impressed and Im not easily impressed, I assure you.
I will pray you have no lonliness and on a lighter note.... men are like buses, another one will be along every 15 minutes. The next one may be the love of your life! That is an exciting thought.
Kim,
You made the right choice. You know it was cause he was gone within 24 hours. You must have had enough of his sh*t to finally kick him to the curb. Things were only going to get worse I fear so it's good you sent him packin.
So how are the kids? Are they upset about him leaving or are they happy about it.. I know he's not the father of your children that's why I ask if they are happy. Sometimes children have a way of seeing people for what they are even though it takes adults a lot longer.
Anyway glad we could all be there for you when you needed us.
Have agreat day! Rae
You made the right choice. You know it was cause he was gone within 24 hours. You must have had enough of his sh*t to finally kick him to the curb. Things were only going to get worse I fear so it's good you sent him packin.
So how are the kids? Are they upset about him leaving or are they happy about it.. I know he's not the father of your children that's why I ask if they are happy. Sometimes children have a way of seeing people for what they are even though it takes adults a lot longer.
Anyway glad we could all be there for you when you needed us.
Have agreat day! Rae
Hi Kim,
You are doing the right thing, especially if you have thoughts that you would have slipped, than it was DEFINATELY the right thing because you are probably right, you would have. Keep fighting, you are doing great!!
Best Regards,
Tom
You are doing the right thing, especially if you have thoughts that you would have slipped, than it was DEFINATELY the right thing because you are probably right, you would have. Keep fighting, you are doing great!!
Best Regards,
Tom
Hey Kim, a friend of mine gave me this # the other day. It is too freaking funny. It is a recording in Orlando Florida. If you want a good laugh call it. The next time some creep asks you to go out with him just give him this # instead of your real #..... LOL call it you'll laugh, oh man I am so mean. If I only would have had this # years ago I would have passes it out to my share of men...
Ok it's 407-338-0036
Ok it's 407-338-0036
Kim, i am so proud of you! you have come a long way baby!
hi kim, i know what you are going thru and i had to make a no contact rule with my ex. he is not clean and although i didnt feel like using just the craziness of addiction and his behavior was the end for me. i hated the way i felt when i talked to him or saw him and i made a stand once and for all that my recovery is going to be first in my life no matter what. i had forgotton how high drama and incredibly selfish it all was. when one person gets clean and the other doesnt it almost becomes a act of wills. when a person gets clean change happens and a addict who is still using like my ex almost resents change and in my case i am no longer on the same page. without my meetings, step work and my sponser i cant say what would or could have happened. i am thinking about you and wish you the best.
carol
carol
