Is My Bf Addicted To Mj?

My boyfriend & I have been dating for 9 months now. He's wonderful and we get along great but I recently found out he smokes mj and it's really bothering me.
At first, it didn't bother me because I thought it was a once in a while thing but now I'm wondering how often he does it. Last night he told me he does it a few times a week. I think it's alot more!! I'm finding myself going thru his personal belongings looking for the pot. Since Sunday, he has smoked at least twice that I know of. I feel like he's hiding it from me when he does it and he says that he knows I don't like it so he doesn't smoke in front of me. I've tried to talk to him about my feelings but he gets angry with me. I have fallen in love with him but this is tearing me apart. I want a future with him but I'm very concerned about this. Right now I'm feeling like I should walk away but another part of me is saying stick with it and see what happens. I'm trying not to overreact but don't want to get myself in a bad situation. Can anyone tell me what I should do and is he truly addicted?????
Only your boyfriend can answer that question for real however if he is hiding his use and finds he cannot go without then he probably is. My best advice to you is to look after your needs. If you don't look after yourself you won't be able to help anyone else Take care!
Thanks for the advice junem. I know he has been smoking for alot of years so he isn't going to stop anytime soon. I really love him but it's not going to be enough. I'm a strong, smart woman and I plan on keeping a close eye on this and eventually I will have to make a decision about staying in the relationship.
Thanks again!!!!
I@ve been a daily weed smoker for years and years now and while I always thought it didn't adversely impact my life recently I've begun to rexamine things. 2 years of heroin use will do that.While I don't consider it a "gateway" drug I do think my use of both things, and others, were symptoms of an underlying discontent and ultimately unhappiness.I can see why he's getting defensive- he sees it as innoccuous and you as overreacting. Which you maybe are.These things are complicated and what's right depends on context and circumstances and feelings which only those involved can be, or try to be, aware of. Cut him some slack-I would be distraught if a girl who loved me left me over a bit ofweed
Thanks for the advice Carlito!!! I talked with my boyfriend last night and told him my concerns. He said that he doesn't have a problem and that I shouldn't worry. He said it's really no different than people having a few drinks and getting buzzed from it. He's got a point!!! He also said that he does it because he wants to not because he needs to. I'm not sure in the long run if I'll be able to handle him smoking but I'm going to keep trying and keep my eyes open. I've never dated anyone who smokes so it's new for me and scary.
SH,
I hate to tell you this but he is not going to admit he has a problem with it until he hits rock bottom. I know this sounds weird about a drug like pot. It's not coke or heroin, right? WRONG!!!! I have been dealing with a situation similar to yours for 10 years now. My husband started just smoking pot once in a while. Then it was on weekends, then at night to relax after coming home from work. Finally to smoking all day, every day. He used to give me the same excuse that it is to relax and take the edge off - no different from drinking a few beers! BS!!! Cope with reality man - why do you need a daily escape from reality. He told me that when we had kids, he would stop. Well here I am, 10 years and 2 kids later and he still hasn't stopped. Don't get me wrong, he has tried several times - but only lasted about a month at the longest. Well he came home and told me he got stoned and cheated on me. I was going to leave with the kids but he swears he is done with pot. I am afraid to believe him but this is his last chance. Get out now girlfriend, before you find yourself in the same place I am. Good luck!
Thanks for the advice ivebeenthere. Wow.......your in a tough situation!!! A few weeks ago I told my boyfriend that I wasn't going to be able to handle him smoking and ended our relationship. He was devastated!!! I gave him sometime to think about it and he told me that he was giving up smoking because it wasn't worth losing me. He admitted that for a few weeks he was doing it quite often but just got cared away. Were together everyday and he hasn't smoked in two weeks now. We've been dating for 10 months and I never noticed him smoking until a few weeks ago. I'm still not sure if he has a problem but at this point I don't think he does. Maybe I overreacted????? So, I'm giving him the benefit of the doubt but I have my eyes wide open. I love this man very much and I have to trust that he hasn't & won't smoke anymore. If I was in your situation I would not stick around. I give you alot of credit for sticking it out but you can only give a person so many chances. It sounds like you've given him many chances and you & your children deserve better. Good luck and let me know what happens.