I am heading off to work out then off to an AA meeting later:) Day 5 of a clean and sober life.
You seem to be at peace, congratulations!
Thanks JustJ:) I do feel at peace because it feels good to finally stop the denial and try to convince myself that as a recovered alkie I could not continue to get high. I knew I would have to face it one day but I just didn't want to have to go through the embarrassment of facing my sponsor and home group but once that was over I can finally move on clean and sober.
Now Sunday night my husband and i plan to go listen to live music and I'm a bit anxous about that since I enjoy that while being high. Will I enjoy it as much without the pot??? is the thought in my head. I learned through AA that these are just thoughts and to check my motives. Why am I going? to listen to music and watch our friend and his band perform. If I keep that as a focus then soon I will break the habit of wanting to get stoned before going in...then heading out to the car again to 'hit the pipe' to keep the high going all night. Crazy! Those days are over for me. I know I have hurdles to jump over but I will one day at a time:)
Hope your doing ok. I will pray that you are staying stong. We have to adjust to getting high on life:)
Now Sunday night my husband and i plan to go listen to live music and I'm a bit anxous about that since I enjoy that while being high. Will I enjoy it as much without the pot??? is the thought in my head. I learned through AA that these are just thoughts and to check my motives. Why am I going? to listen to music and watch our friend and his band perform. If I keep that as a focus then soon I will break the habit of wanting to get stoned before going in...then heading out to the car again to 'hit the pipe' to keep the high going all night. Crazy! Those days are over for me. I know I have hurdles to jump over but I will one day at a time:)
Hope your doing ok. I will pray that you are staying stong. We have to adjust to getting high on life:)
Hi pql,
I just want to say to you that I really, really enjoy reading your posts. I almost retain something important from them that help me get my day without pot. Most importantly, they remind me why I quit and how I can continue on my road to recovery from pot. In your last post, I really really enjoy what you say in regards to remaining focus on the things we choose to do and how we can go through them (like going to see friends play music) without having to smoke pot before, during and after the event.
Thank you for you advice. That is what I find hard about not doing any drugs. That is, reminding myself that I can do things in life without being stoned. To be honest with you, I am truly just discovering the beauty of doing things, like going up to the lake, reading a book, walking outside with puppy, etc. etc. without being stoned. I guess eventually it will become easier and easier going through life straight.
Were getting reading to go up to the lake now. It's going to be a beautiful weekend. I bought more flowers to plant and I'm really looking forward to doing that.
You take care now.
Ciao
I just want to say to you that I really, really enjoy reading your posts. I almost retain something important from them that help me get my day without pot. Most importantly, they remind me why I quit and how I can continue on my road to recovery from pot. In your last post, I really really enjoy what you say in regards to remaining focus on the things we choose to do and how we can go through them (like going to see friends play music) without having to smoke pot before, during and after the event.
Thank you for you advice. That is what I find hard about not doing any drugs. That is, reminding myself that I can do things in life without being stoned. To be honest with you, I am truly just discovering the beauty of doing things, like going up to the lake, reading a book, walking outside with puppy, etc. etc. without being stoned. I guess eventually it will become easier and easier going through life straight.
Were getting reading to go up to the lake now. It's going to be a beautiful weekend. I bought more flowers to plant and I'm really looking forward to doing that.
You take care now.
Ciao
Hi Fluer:) Your post brought a smile to my face today!! It feels so good to know that my Experience, Strength and Hope can help another addict. That is a big part of why I finally got clean after a year of sobriety. After going through the 12 steps with sponsor in AA I did have a spiritual awakening and understand that in order to keep what we have we have to give it back! One day I hope to sponsor another alcoholic in AA and I know I can't do that while getting high. I would hate myself to know that I may have caused some one to go out and drink because I was too stoned to answer the phone or meet them somewhere if they needed my help. So not only am I doing this for me but for others who are seeking a clean and sober life. My life is way, way better than it was a year ago. I had been in therapy for year suffering from anxiety, worry and stress. Once I got sober and started working the steps the anxiety lifted and soon learned to appreciate the simpler things in life.Like walking my dogs, sitting still and reading, sitting by a lake...sounds like we have some similar interest Fluer:)
Now I am learning, just as you are right now, to enjoy those activities clean as well. I learned in AA that we can't look ahead and think of all the things we want or have to do in the future. All I can handle is these 24 hours ahead of me. As long as we don't partake in our drug of choice to get through the day then we are successful. I would like to begin trying daily meditation to substitute getting high to clear any concerns of the day away. AA has helped me to sit and be comfortable in my skin so I am confident that with practice meditation will help immensely. I've read up on it and have attended a couple meditation AA meetings in my area. I can now sit for 15 minutes without wanting to jump out of my skin!! That is big for me because my mind and mouth can go 100 mph at times...especially if I have too much coffee. LOL! I know God wants only good things for us and He will provide everything we need each day as long as we turn our will and life over to His care.
Thank you for your reply. You made my night:) God bless you and enjoy your time at the lake being completely present in the moment because that is all we have is right NOW.
Take care xoxo
Now I am learning, just as you are right now, to enjoy those activities clean as well. I learned in AA that we can't look ahead and think of all the things we want or have to do in the future. All I can handle is these 24 hours ahead of me. As long as we don't partake in our drug of choice to get through the day then we are successful. I would like to begin trying daily meditation to substitute getting high to clear any concerns of the day away. AA has helped me to sit and be comfortable in my skin so I am confident that with practice meditation will help immensely. I've read up on it and have attended a couple meditation AA meetings in my area. I can now sit for 15 minutes without wanting to jump out of my skin!! That is big for me because my mind and mouth can go 100 mph at times...especially if I have too much coffee. LOL! I know God wants only good things for us and He will provide everything we need each day as long as we turn our will and life over to His care.
Thank you for your reply. You made my night:) God bless you and enjoy your time at the lake being completely present in the moment because that is all we have is right NOW.
Take care xoxo
