IM JUST NEEDING A BIT OF SUPPORT RITE NOW.IVE BEEN TRYING FOR A LONG TIME TO KICK MY SMACK HABBIT AND EVERY TIME IM DOING GOOD SOME REPRABATE WILL COME ALONG AND OFFER ME SOME FOR NOTHING!!! BUT WHEN IM SKINT AND RATTLIN THEY WONT SO MUCH AS OFFER YOU A BLOW BACK I'VE NOT SEEN MY DAUGHTERS DAD FOR 2YRS AND HE TURNED UP ON HER BIRTHDAY WIF A KNOCKED DVD PLAYER FOR HER AND THEN OFFERD ME A 50 BAG OF KIT FOR NOTHING?WETHER IVE BEEN OFF IT FOR YEARS THAT A BIG TEMPTATION AND I TOOK IT .HE WOULD HAVE DONE BETTER BUYING STUFF FOR THE DAUGHTER OR EVEN GIVING MONEY FOR FOOD/CLOTHES...NOW HE SAYING IM A JUNKIE BAD MOTHER FOR TAKING IT.DEVIENT AND EVIL THATS ALL THAT COMES WIF HERION
AND THE PEOPLE TOO.IM AT MY END AND HAVE NO ONE I CAN TALK TO ABOUT HOW I FEEL AND WHAT IM GOING THREW.SO IF THERES ANYONE THERE THAT COULD HELP ME I'D APPRECIATE IT
SAD NAD
..Nad..
..All you can do..is keep giving it ya best shot..we all know how hard heroin is to kick..you,ve made ya first step by coming on here..i know wot you mean when you say >> when your off it..ppl offer you it for nuffin or its there on a plate for ya..then when your on it and your bang in trouble..no one,no one gives a f***..thats the druggame..thats all the s*** that comes with being an addict..and it is a lonely life when you,ve got no one to turn to when you need support..but coming on here..you,ll get all the support you need..i know its a pc and not face to face..but just having sumone to read and understand wot your saying and type back to ya..is a massive help..it was to me..all them sleepless nights and feeling like s*** is a horrible thing to go thru..but theres always sumone on here to offer you support and hope..you know that your the only one who can get you off the brown..but having sumone to back you up will help..don,t be to hard on yourself about your daughter..we,ve all done things we regret because of our addiction..but being there for her and trying to kick your habit..your doing a great thing..i hope you can find it in yourself to kick your addiction..and if you do..just walk on by those ppl who offer you their s*** for nuffin..they,re just tryna drag you back down..they need you more than you need them..theres a thousand of ppl just like them..they don,t want your friendship or anything else..just your money..anytime youneed to talk or vent or get ya feelings out..just click on here and theres ppl here for ya..good luck in getting off the brown..your worth more to yourself than that..your a mother who has sumone who loves her more than anything in the world..take care nad..Robbie..
..All you can do..is keep giving it ya best shot..we all know how hard heroin is to kick..you,ve made ya first step by coming on here..i know wot you mean when you say >> when your off it..ppl offer you it for nuffin or its there on a plate for ya..then when your on it and your bang in trouble..no one,no one gives a f***..thats the druggame..thats all the s*** that comes with being an addict..and it is a lonely life when you,ve got no one to turn to when you need support..but coming on here..you,ll get all the support you need..i know its a pc and not face to face..but just having sumone to read and understand wot your saying and type back to ya..is a massive help..it was to me..all them sleepless nights and feeling like s*** is a horrible thing to go thru..but theres always sumone on here to offer you support and hope..you know that your the only one who can get you off the brown..but having sumone to back you up will help..don,t be to hard on yourself about your daughter..we,ve all done things we regret because of our addiction..but being there for her and trying to kick your habit..your doing a great thing..i hope you can find it in yourself to kick your addiction..and if you do..just walk on by those ppl who offer you their s*** for nuffin..they,re just tryna drag you back down..they need you more than you need them..theres a thousand of ppl just like them..they don,t want your friendship or anything else..just your money..anytime youneed to talk or vent or get ya feelings out..just click on here and theres ppl here for ya..good luck in getting off the brown..your worth more to yourself than that..your a mother who has sumone who loves her more than anything in the world..take care nad..Robbie..
Hi ya Nad,
I'm quite new to this board, and I came here because I was relapsing after 4 years clean. My habit had lasted for about 5 years. And it had started with smoking then after a year or so to needles, and then after 2 years or so I was hitting up FURIOUSLY crack and heroin. It still amazes me what I was doing to myself. I was lucky in That several things happened to me around the end of IT.
You see I was living ina co-op with about 12 other users living less than 20 yards from me so I know exactly what your talking about with the fair weather friends.
However, the thing that got me on the road to recovery was when the 'straight' ppl around me took action to evict me from the co-op. This started the process of me moving away from both the heroin and the ppl that I had been using with.
And if I hadn't done this then I think that I would still be in that hole.
I don't know you or your situation, But like I said, I had to firstly move out the place I was living, and then move 400 miles to another city to actually get out of the sphere of influence of my addictions and the people that I had been using with.
So now this is my opinion, and that is all it is, you have to make your own decisions, but if you want to stop I think you should consider BOTH moving and completely cutting off ALL ties with those that are associated with your habit. I mean moving a distance that makes it impractical scoring from old sources.
Of course you can find new sources where ever you are but I found that not having any links in the new city, too begin with gave me that distance where whether I scored or not was a conscious action rather than a conditioned reflex.
I.E. I made a decision rather than the habit.
I hope this helps, but you have to do what ever it takes to stop.
And Like I said this is my opinion.
GOOD LUCK AND LOVE
julius.
I'm quite new to this board, and I came here because I was relapsing after 4 years clean. My habit had lasted for about 5 years. And it had started with smoking then after a year or so to needles, and then after 2 years or so I was hitting up FURIOUSLY crack and heroin. It still amazes me what I was doing to myself. I was lucky in That several things happened to me around the end of IT.
You see I was living ina co-op with about 12 other users living less than 20 yards from me so I know exactly what your talking about with the fair weather friends.
However, the thing that got me on the road to recovery was when the 'straight' ppl around me took action to evict me from the co-op. This started the process of me moving away from both the heroin and the ppl that I had been using with.
And if I hadn't done this then I think that I would still be in that hole.
I don't know you or your situation, But like I said, I had to firstly move out the place I was living, and then move 400 miles to another city to actually get out of the sphere of influence of my addictions and the people that I had been using with.
So now this is my opinion, and that is all it is, you have to make your own decisions, but if you want to stop I think you should consider BOTH moving and completely cutting off ALL ties with those that are associated with your habit. I mean moving a distance that makes it impractical scoring from old sources.
Of course you can find new sources where ever you are but I found that not having any links in the new city, too begin with gave me that distance where whether I scored or not was a conscious action rather than a conditioned reflex.
I.E. I made a decision rather than the habit.
I hope this helps, but you have to do what ever it takes to stop.
And Like I said this is my opinion.
GOOD LUCK AND LOVE
julius.
I think one of the worst things about addiction is the depression and self-loathing that go along with it. It's a viscous cycle. When you're using, you think you're a terrible person and a terrible parent. And when u try to quit, u start thinking of all the things that u used to forget about. (usually, stuff u did to get the gear) The reason I mention this is I can tell that you are very depressed!! It might make u feel a little better to know that it's a symptom of the disease of addiction. You'll be surprised at how quickly your life can change for the better, though. Once u make a decision to rule your life yourself instead of letting "Mr. H" run it for u, It's all good. You'll have bad days' but your worst day in recovery will always be better than your best day using. That's what they say, anyway. I guess what I'm trying to say is, you will have better days. There's always someone here to talk to. This message board has helped me alot. Good Luck and peace, Shirley
