Yesterday I just happened across my husband's "stash" It was $1,200.00.
So I went shopping, bought a top and some shoes and a sunmmer purse.
Don't really like to shop so I did some damage at the bowing alley - I really like bowling - a pink and purple ball, pink and white shoes and a bag - then got 3 free games. Still have plenty left.
My arm is about to fall off.
I still did my morning speed walk.
He can't say anything (he will before it's over with) b/c it was hidden.
One for the girls!
Becky
He can't say anything because you took his money? huh?
I don't know Jean, to me that is taking what isn't yours. Right?
I see if differently, if I found a stash of cash that my husband had been hiding, I would not have taken it regardless of the situation.
What if he had taken it from you and said the same thing you said? Not sure you would like it. I know I wouldn't.
Good luck once he finds it is missing. whew doggie I would be livid.
I see if differently, if I found a stash of cash that my husband had been hiding, I would not have taken it regardless of the situation.
What if he had taken it from you and said the same thing you said? Not sure you would like it. I know I wouldn't.
Good luck once he finds it is missing. whew doggie I would be livid.
oh Becky that is soo funny. My husband hides money and we aren't even getting divorced (YET) LOL! And it's not b/c he thinks i will buy pills b/c i don't have to buy em, it's b/c he is a tight wad! i feel like it's our money that we've worked for in our produce and chicken business so what gives him the right to hide it? I say good for you!!
Becky, Just wondering if you and your husband have an agreement that his money is his and yours is yours after the bills are paid? I know for me and my husband we have a joint bank account and both of our checks go in there. After all of our bills are paid and we have put money into our savings account whatever is left if either one of us want anything we just buy it. I'm not saying major purchases that we would discuss and have to agree on to purchase. With us it is like whats mine is his and whats his is mine. Now if our money was seperate and I found a stash he had hidden that was his money I would have never touched it as I would expect the same respect from him if he found mine. Good luck when he finds out hope he is not to pissed. Shantel
We have always put all money together and I have NEVER hidden any money from him.
He had a plan and I blew it.
Becky
He had a plan and I blew it.
Becky
My marriage is based on honesty. I would never take money that wasn't offered or mine. If I found money, I would ask him about it and he would gladly give me whatever....stealing and deception are addictive behaviors, I would be careful of that.
I'm learning that all bets are off when it comes to a divorce.
I Didn't have money stashed away.
That's dishonesty.
Becky
I Didn't have money stashed away.
That's dishonesty.
Becky
I just know that stuff like that comes back to bite you in the a*ss if you aren't careful...
ok I asked my husband here is his opinion, he (your husband) worked for that money, you had no right divorce or otherwise to take what was his. No different than if he took your jewelry and sold it. If you go with the whats his and mine scenario, then he is welcomed to your stuff and he can do with it as he pleases.
The bottom line per hubby and I agree with him. It is his mad money that he earned. And being yall are getting a divorced, hell I would have stashed money too, for the simple fact I need to live. A cushion if you will.
He doesn't know if you will go and wipe out the account and leave him with nothing. He is covering his a** in my opinion. Not saying you would, but divorce seems to turn nasty; historically.
But hey, you have to live with him. Not us. Just giving my opinion.
It isn't stealing legally due to community property however the judge could say ok Jean you need to be prepared to give up half of what you considered yours. Be it your diamond rings, anything.
My divorce was amicable, only because we both sat down and said, 'let's not pay a ton of money to lawyers, lets use one lawyer between us, and be adults about splitting things up.'
He cheated on me, so he felt guilty, but I didn't leave him with nothing. He is human and at one time I did love him. I forgave him and moved on with my life.
The bottom line per hubby and I agree with him. It is his mad money that he earned. And being yall are getting a divorced, hell I would have stashed money too, for the simple fact I need to live. A cushion if you will.
He doesn't know if you will go and wipe out the account and leave him with nothing. He is covering his a** in my opinion. Not saying you would, but divorce seems to turn nasty; historically.
But hey, you have to live with him. Not us. Just giving my opinion.
It isn't stealing legally due to community property however the judge could say ok Jean you need to be prepared to give up half of what you considered yours. Be it your diamond rings, anything.
My divorce was amicable, only because we both sat down and said, 'let's not pay a ton of money to lawyers, lets use one lawyer between us, and be adults about splitting things up.'
He cheated on me, so he felt guilty, but I didn't leave him with nothing. He is human and at one time I did love him. I forgave him and moved on with my life.
Shantel,
We operate the same way you do. I just came back from getting a job from a cleaning place cleaning houses till I can find something better, but for now, ya gotta do what ya gotta do, right?
But when it comes to money with us, it all goes into one account and if theres leftover, I'll buy something for me or one of the kids and he'll do the same, like you said, if its something big, we discuss it, but its family money, we've never seperated our money (he's the one that worked for it) but we're still honest about it and whats his is ours and whats mine is ours. I think thats the way it should be. Has worked for us for almost twenty years.
Becky, I gotta agree with most on here. I think that was wrong, if it was hidden, he obviously had plans for it and I wouldn't like Ken doing something like that to me. I'd be pissed. He'll probably be too when he finds out. So, that was naughty!
We operate the same way you do. I just came back from getting a job from a cleaning place cleaning houses till I can find something better, but for now, ya gotta do what ya gotta do, right?
But when it comes to money with us, it all goes into one account and if theres leftover, I'll buy something for me or one of the kids and he'll do the same, like you said, if its something big, we discuss it, but its family money, we've never seperated our money (he's the one that worked for it) but we're still honest about it and whats his is ours and whats mine is ours. I think thats the way it should be. Has worked for us for almost twenty years.
Becky, I gotta agree with most on here. I think that was wrong, if it was hidden, he obviously had plans for it and I wouldn't like Ken doing something like that to me. I'd be pissed. He'll probably be too when he finds out. So, that was naughty!
Community property or not, it's still deceptive and sneaky to go through someone's stuff and take what doesn't belong to you. Divorce or not, it's still wrong and puts you on his level. This is why divorces get so nasty, because of behavoir like that.
Roe, LMAO at that was naughty. Shantel
Plus, taking the dough tends to piss the Judge off somewhat if your husband was to allege you took it. Which he will.
The LAST thing ya want is a pissed off Judge.
The LAST thing ya want is a pissed off Judge.
Ok. I'm convinced it wasn't the best thing for Becky to do. In my marriage our farm is run and worked by the both of us equally thus I feel the money is equally ours. so, I feel in my situation him hiding money is very wrong b/c it belongs to the both of us. He spends money without telling me and i do the same, but he sees what I buy through the checks i write. i have found money stashes and didn't touch it. Never have. It does tick me off that he hides money and I would never hide money from him. We both work for that money. we aren't getting a divorce, but my mother and stepdad is. While she was in the hospital in December he took all of her jewelry. And not just what was bought during their marriage. It was things I bought her, my grandmother, and My dad when they were married. The judge hasn't done a d**** thing bout it. I can kinda see him taking jewlry he bought her, but not the other. Even though the law says that anything bought for the spouse by the other spouse is considered personal property and he couldn't legally take any of it. I'm sorry I think i got off on a tangent here so I'm gona stop here!LOL
It was he who hid the money. Maybe for a better divorce attorney than me, I don't really know. Sure, it wasn't to upgrade my diamond. We have ALWAYS kept the money together and all that was left, we planned together.
Cowgirl, your answer would only work in the Cleaver household - come on - are we perfect all of the time?
I have shared with him - he with me for 28 years - if he brings it up which means he has being deceptive, I will give him half back.
Becky
Cowgirl, your answer would only work in the Cleaver household - come on - are we perfect all of the time?
I have shared with him - he with me for 28 years - if he brings it up which means he has being deceptive, I will give him half back.
Becky
Rhonda,
That was really wrong that he took your mom's jewelry because by right, I think that should be yours (and your sister's if she were still with us) and from there it should have been Syd's. Family jewelry should be passed down generation to generation. That sucks. Did ya get my emails?
Maybe I'll come to your farm and we can run from the chickens. I laughed when you wrote about going in there houses and them following you with they're beady eyes. Yikes, chiken's freak me out.
My legs are bad and I can't run, but I bet if I had your chickens behind me I could run like Forrest Gump!
That was really wrong that he took your mom's jewelry because by right, I think that should be yours (and your sister's if she were still with us) and from there it should have been Syd's. Family jewelry should be passed down generation to generation. That sucks. Did ya get my emails?
Maybe I'll come to your farm and we can run from the chickens. I laughed when you wrote about going in there houses and them following you with they're beady eyes. Yikes, chiken's freak me out.
My legs are bad and I can't run, but I bet if I had your chickens behind me I could run like Forrest Gump!
Legally, the jewerly is a marital asset and would have been divided in a settlement but most NORMAL people don't even include it in the division of the property. It's usually not even mentioned unless there was a TON of it...I mean Queen of England quantity. However, anything gained through inheritence is a non-marital asset. That includes money or even a parcel of real estate.
With that said by Danny, is there anyway you could get the jewelry back so you could have it in your family?
Even if it isn't the Hope diamond, it still should belong to you.
Even if it isn't the Hope diamond, it still should belong to you.
Briar, yes you can. You would need to list it as either a pre-marital asset or inheritence in your property settlement. If it was given to you by any other means than an inheritence though and during the marriage, it's a marital asset.
People who are in the process of divorce (or contemplating it) cannot simply "take" things. They can't perform any act that directly (or indirectly) is meant to exhaust or reduce the value of holdings or assets. It's egregious and it will bite the person in the butt. If the offended party presses it, the court will certainly order repayment of 1/2 the value and more than like full value, in addition to it really pissing the judge off.
People who are in the process of divorce (or contemplating it) cannot simply "take" things. They can't perform any act that directly (or indirectly) is meant to exhaust or reduce the value of holdings or assets. It's egregious and it will bite the person in the butt. If the offended party presses it, the court will certainly order repayment of 1/2 the value and more than like full value, in addition to it really pissing the judge off.