May I spill? This just happened and this is my place to vent.
Good news my daughter was here. It was her birthday. It was last minute, but hey ya know it's all good. She planned to stay overnight at her other grandparents house around the corner. I personally walked her around there and saw her go in the door last night. Other good news is she's not doing drugs. She went into this whole clinical thing about how did I know her vaso vegal syncope is dangerous and any kind of speed or narcotics could virtually kill her? She's smoking ciggies and won't take the pill until she quits. I mean she's up on all that. Good.
Plan was to come over today as I had to go to the bank and I'd leave more money with my mom to give her. She left me saying she'd be up early and would be around to see my mom. Never showed. Never called. Her cell is broken. So close to 24 hours later no daughter. Did she stay at the grandparents? Did she get a ride? Did she take the subway? I don't know. Well, after calling about three times I left a message with them that last I saw her she was going in their home. She never showed up. Does anyone know where this girl is?
Phone rings within ten minutes. "Mom, I JUST got home and got my cell charged and I can't talk because my foot is three times the size it should be". Color me crazy, but I mentioned last night that wearing $1.00 Chinese slippers in the hood is not a good idea. House shoes would be better. I'll take ya to get sandals and sneakers I tell her. I was careful not to say "See, see I KNEW it". Well she's not sure if she got stuck or bit. Walking through a abandoned lot of weeds and crappolla in her hood. HELLO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Then I say well go put the peroxide on it. Clean it good. If it is that swollen call me and I'll meet ya in University City at the ER. I told her I hope she knows I am not trying to control her or hunt her down, but God forbid something happened I'd have no way to find her or tell anyone where she might be or with whom and she said "Mom, I know it's because you care. I used to worry about you when you were out there. I worried you'd get killed or OD, BUT you did always finally call mom-mom no matter what so we could go to sleep. We knew you were alive. I know you care, mom".
Well, for the love of all things out of the mouths of young adults with junkie a*s mothers. I'm not sure weather to be hurt, proud, sad, happy or plain just sick. Thanks for listening.
First I want to say that I am glad that you and daughter seem to be doing better. It is better somewhat, isn't it? Second....did she tell you that bout when you were out there to try and take some of the heat off of her or was it a sincere "I know you care" thing?
Man, I am about ready to kill my son....who is just 12 by the way. Yesterday, I was texting my 10 yr old daughter.....joking like we always do. He read her text and thought I was serious so he took it upon himself to text me to tell me how hateful I am. I told him I was joking with her (she knew it) and to give me his cell phone when he gets home b/c I'm not paying for it so he can text mean messages to me. He texted back "whaterever".
I know that doesn't see all that bad, but he backtalks me all the time and is so hateful to me.......of course dad doesn't say a thing to him. He told me to shut up the other day among other smartmouthed stuff. I am at my wits end with him!!!!!!!
Anyway, I really hope things are improving for you and daughter.
Man, I am about ready to kill my son....who is just 12 by the way. Yesterday, I was texting my 10 yr old daughter.....joking like we always do. He read her text and thought I was serious so he took it upon himself to text me to tell me how hateful I am. I told him I was joking with her (she knew it) and to give me his cell phone when he gets home b/c I'm not paying for it so he can text mean messages to me. He texted back "whaterever".
I know that doesn't see all that bad, but he backtalks me all the time and is so hateful to me.......of course dad doesn't say a thing to him. He told me to shut up the other day among other smartmouthed stuff. I am at my wits end with him!!!!!!!
Anyway, I really hope things are improving for you and daughter.
Bryn, honey, you saw her!! how great...........even tho the visit wasn't all you wanted it to be, and the anxiety about her continued, I'm sure this opened the door just a little bit more for her to be back in your life.
Of course she knows you care..........and she does too, even tho she 'll be damned if she will say it.
Still sending out prayers for you both, and for your Mom.
rita
Of course she knows you care..........and she does too, even tho she 'll be damned if she will say it.
Still sending out prayers for you both, and for your Mom.
rita
Bryn,
One day might you stop calling yourself a junkie a** mom
Interesting how things are working out, you know, little by little the tide is shifting and she seems to be opening up.
So what is up with her foot she go get checked yet
And grandmom, I am trying to catch up is she staying as long as she wants now
Thinking of you,
Love,
Tina
Be on the lookout, sending something soon
One day might you stop calling yourself a junkie a** mom
Interesting how things are working out, you know, little by little the tide is shifting and she seems to be opening up.
So what is up with her foot she go get checked yet
And grandmom, I am trying to catch up is she staying as long as she wants now
Thinking of you,
Love,
Tina
Be on the lookout, sending something soon
Bryn, it all sounds like good news to me. Whatever her reason for saying that to you, she got something out in the open instead being all passive-aggressive with it. In her own way she told you she understands your need, and still managed to let you know she's still smarting a little.
I'm with Tina, please stop calling yourself that...as long as you do, that label will have life...and it shouldn't, you're so far past that. It only has power if you give it power...and I wish you wouldn't, but when you're ready I guess, as in all things.
She's sharp that one...I don't know that you need to worry...bet she'll be okay taking care of herself. But you're a mom, like me, and sometimes...well, we just can't let go all that easily, can we? All in good time...
Love to you~M&M
I'm with Tina, please stop calling yourself that...as long as you do, that label will have life...and it shouldn't, you're so far past that. It only has power if you give it power...and I wish you wouldn't, but when you're ready I guess, as in all things.
She's sharp that one...I don't know that you need to worry...bet she'll be okay taking care of herself. But you're a mom, like me, and sometimes...well, we just can't let go all that easily, can we? All in good time...
Love to you~M&M
i think it's going in the right direction for whatever reason she said what she did it's a good sign. My kids give it to me about my using least once a week i'll hear do you remember?.... it will be something i'ld just be over joyed to forget. My son said i was more fun before lol. Poor boy i was not fun i was very ill. I think he liked me getting him up 30 mins late for school not asking if he had homework.
I would love to find out if her foot is okay it sounds not too good.
She just had a birthday maybe she is getting wiser...hopefully.
I would love to find out if her foot is okay it sounds not too good.
She just had a birthday maybe she is getting wiser...hopefully.
Bryn....jeez..im sorry....but damn...cant you lay off her for the stupid s*** ?...slippers...so she hurt her feet...how many times have we worn shoes that hurt cuz they looked good....so what ???....get it looked at....get it fixed....think she probably already knows she shouldnt wear them out in the hood now....ok....sorry...just had to say that....and your NOT a junkie a** mom no more...your a Mom....and congrats....she cares....thats all that should matter...not being harsh...just hit me wrong I think hearing that...and she tells you she cares....and that she worried about you...thats a huge thing....you should be proud of her...she sounds just like you ya know :) :) hugs
Con
Con
Thank you ladies.
Yes, you are all right..........if I keep referring to myself as a lousey junkie......I could be setting myself up to going back out........self- fullfilled prophecy........and lucky nobody else called me it..........I'd be freaking out........by my daughter bringing that up though it's what came to my mind.....and M&M is right..........she got that one in there, but better than keeping it all bottled up.
Rita~Thank you. Yep, you understand the just seeing her thingie. It meant alot. I hope you are in the same boat as far as things coming around in regards to DD's.
T~ THanks for asking about gram. She's here for a few weeks. She's having a ball. I sent some words your way my Dear Tina.
M&M~Always, you are wise. I'm making a pact with moi to cease the low life me, me, me talk. Labelling myself in negative ways can't be good.
ZG~How about how them kids throw it out there? Sure, you were "fun mommy" when you were using. Fun to the tune of the kids missing school and not getting homework done. Truthfully, we know they don't mean that even if they truly think they do. Every single day you're proving yourself to being a good mom. A good human being and I am proud of you.
Con~Oh ya had to go there with them shoes. I call them shoes for a lack of a better word. I'd like to say "Well I am a mom and it is my job to be judgemental and pick on the outfit and the hair and the shoes". However, that is so NOT me. My DD could come home with a tattoo up her arm and piercings and pink and purple hair and it's all fine by me. That is as long as there was no chance of getting a disease due to lack of hygene at the tattoo artist or it hindering her up the road. She's actually conservative in that way as I'm the opposite.
No, the shoes. The shoes. It wasn't about looking cute. It was about lack of a decent pair of shoes I think. I'm on the ball not to be all up in her business about what she wears or how she looks as long as she is happy and healthy. It was the fact my friend got 18 stitches that way years ago. Wound up getting blood poisoning. She got hospitalized because no antibiotics worked. Had to get IV antibiotics. So, it was about safety. About using common sense and avoiding the Emergency Room on a weekend evening in the city where you'll sit for hours and hours along with the mugging victims and watching the gunshot victims come in and out.
Nope, not about getting on her nerves about something mundane like my mom would. I didn't say a thing about the long skirt she was walking on. I know my mom wanted to say "I washed the kitchen floor with better rags than that and you look like a rag picker". My mom did tell her to go get a safety pin so she could pin it because she was tripping on it. It was killing my mom how she looked as she is very heavy. Still she didn't say a word about it. As long as she's happy and safe is all that matters and I give my own mom credit for chilling on that. My gram was a lilttle upset I could see, but she was just happy to see her as well.
Yeah, I wouldn't want to come "home" and have to listen to my clothes didn't fit and I looked messy. I just wanted her to avoid what happened and that was getting cut. I mean if ya want to just walk barefoot among dirty needles, used tampons, headless pigeons, garbage, rat droppings, and used condoms then hey go on with your bad self. Apparently she went to the ER so she says and it was a cut. They gave her a tetnus shot. She said she didn't have to wait long. She can't wear the "shoes" anymore because they are gone as in flip flops would have lasted longer, but still Lord knows what cut her, but that's on her.
Like ZG mentioned she certainly seems to be coming around and picked up a "wise" notch on the big Birthday. As of this morning her foot was back to normal size and she has a pair of clogs she's slipping on that aren't rubbing the cut. I'm kind of glad nothing bit her. She seems much more receptive and warm so I'm thrilled with that. I'm thankful for that.
I'm thankful to you guys as well. Thanks for listening.
Yes, you are all right..........if I keep referring to myself as a lousey junkie......I could be setting myself up to going back out........self- fullfilled prophecy........and lucky nobody else called me it..........I'd be freaking out........by my daughter bringing that up though it's what came to my mind.....and M&M is right..........she got that one in there, but better than keeping it all bottled up.
Rita~Thank you. Yep, you understand the just seeing her thingie. It meant alot. I hope you are in the same boat as far as things coming around in regards to DD's.
T~ THanks for asking about gram. She's here for a few weeks. She's having a ball. I sent some words your way my Dear Tina.
M&M~Always, you are wise. I'm making a pact with moi to cease the low life me, me, me talk. Labelling myself in negative ways can't be good.
ZG~How about how them kids throw it out there? Sure, you were "fun mommy" when you were using. Fun to the tune of the kids missing school and not getting homework done. Truthfully, we know they don't mean that even if they truly think they do. Every single day you're proving yourself to being a good mom. A good human being and I am proud of you.
Con~Oh ya had to go there with them shoes. I call them shoes for a lack of a better word. I'd like to say "Well I am a mom and it is my job to be judgemental and pick on the outfit and the hair and the shoes". However, that is so NOT me. My DD could come home with a tattoo up her arm and piercings and pink and purple hair and it's all fine by me. That is as long as there was no chance of getting a disease due to lack of hygene at the tattoo artist or it hindering her up the road. She's actually conservative in that way as I'm the opposite.
No, the shoes. The shoes. It wasn't about looking cute. It was about lack of a decent pair of shoes I think. I'm on the ball not to be all up in her business about what she wears or how she looks as long as she is happy and healthy. It was the fact my friend got 18 stitches that way years ago. Wound up getting blood poisoning. She got hospitalized because no antibiotics worked. Had to get IV antibiotics. So, it was about safety. About using common sense and avoiding the Emergency Room on a weekend evening in the city where you'll sit for hours and hours along with the mugging victims and watching the gunshot victims come in and out.
Nope, not about getting on her nerves about something mundane like my mom would. I didn't say a thing about the long skirt she was walking on. I know my mom wanted to say "I washed the kitchen floor with better rags than that and you look like a rag picker". My mom did tell her to go get a safety pin so she could pin it because she was tripping on it. It was killing my mom how she looked as she is very heavy. Still she didn't say a word about it. As long as she's happy and safe is all that matters and I give my own mom credit for chilling on that. My gram was a lilttle upset I could see, but she was just happy to see her as well.
Yeah, I wouldn't want to come "home" and have to listen to my clothes didn't fit and I looked messy. I just wanted her to avoid what happened and that was getting cut. I mean if ya want to just walk barefoot among dirty needles, used tampons, headless pigeons, garbage, rat droppings, and used condoms then hey go on with your bad self. Apparently she went to the ER so she says and it was a cut. They gave her a tetnus shot. She said she didn't have to wait long. She can't wear the "shoes" anymore because they are gone as in flip flops would have lasted longer, but still Lord knows what cut her, but that's on her.
Like ZG mentioned she certainly seems to be coming around and picked up a "wise" notch on the big Birthday. As of this morning her foot was back to normal size and she has a pair of clogs she's slipping on that aren't rubbing the cut. I'm kind of glad nothing bit her. She seems much more receptive and warm so I'm thrilled with that. I'm thankful for that.
I'm thankful to you guys as well. Thanks for listening.
oh my goodness, how in the heck did i miss this post!! WOW bryn, thats awesome!!!!!! real interaction with the species we call daughter.....so happy for you...you know underneath all the worrying you are just ecstatic that all tghis is going on--i dont know about all the rest of it, im just glad you two are interacting, and tose things she said, i do believe they were from the heart, it doesnt seem like shes the kind to say anything remotely heartfelt to get over on you, shed just say something mean if she was feeling it...so take it at face value......and yeah I agree, she seems like shes got a whole lot of her mom in her...congrats my friend!!!
