**lisa**

Pain Pills
1
Hey! Just wondering if you've made it home safely. If so, you are probably busy unpacking etc. Got good news since you've been gone.................
2
Not sure if you mean me or the other Lisa but yes, I am home, safe and sound. Picked up the dogs from the kennel, I was so happy to see them. So what's the good news???? Can't wait to hear!
3
Welcome back Lisa, How is your mom doing? Shantel
4
Thanks Shantell! My mom is back in the ICU. Her platletts bottomed out and she had to have another blood transfusion (this is the second time in a week). The Acute Care facility where she was finally moved to, can't handle that kind of stuff, so she's back in the hospital. It's really hard but I just don't know what to say anymore. They won't give us any long term prognosis.

Aren't you glad you asked? lol It sure isn't much fun around here that's for sure. How are things with you?

xxxooo
5
Welcome home Lisa

I'm sorry about your mom. Hang in there. YGM

Michelle
6
((((hug))))
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awww ((((((((((((((((((((((((hug)))))))))))))))))))))) back at you!

8
I told my husband and made an appointment with an addiction specialist. I will attend solo and group thearapy once a week. I just wanted to thank you for the encouragement to do what I needed to do. Without it I would still be sitting here doing nothing bout my addiction!
9
Lisa,

I am so sorry to hear about your mom.
Your posts don't have to be happy, it's good to see you back.
I am praying for you and your mom.

Gracie
10
I didn't know there was another Lisa. Yes I meant you. Sorry bout your mom!
11
Lisa, prayers and hugs going out to you. God Bless You!
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This is what I miss when I'm away from this board. The love and support that I need from you guys. Thank you.


Rhonda...I am so proud of you! You made my night! How did he react? Are you guys ok? I'm just tickled to death for you!

Chelle...I keep checking my email, but nothing from you? Try again, ok?
13
I love you, Lisa and please know I'm a phone call away if you want to talk. Have you ever read anything written by Eckhart Tolle?

In his book The Power of Now there is a passage that rang true to my spirit, so much that I wrote it down to share some time. I want to share it with you:

"When you are on a journey, it is certainly helpful to know where you are going or at least the general direction in which you are moving, but don't forget: the only thing that is ultimately real about your journey is the step that you are taking at this moment. That's all there ever is."

What a beautiful spirit you are, dear Lisa. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

Love ~

Sammy
14
Lisa......He took it unbelievably well. He said that he had an idea that I had relasped, but didn't ask me b/c he figured I would lie bout it. I started off by telling him that I wanted to see an addiction thearapist b/c I'm still having a hard time coping with the addiction. (Wasn't sure at that point if i was going to tell him everything just yet). He point blank asked me if I was taking pills again and I couldn't look him in the face and lie to him so I said yes. He didn't ask how many I was taking and I didn't tell him how bad it had gotten out of control again, but he knows in his heart. I said I really needed this and bout how much you guys have supported me and encouraged me to tell him the truth. How much of a Godsend you've been and without meeting you all and being on this board I probably would've gone as long as I could keep the charade up. I told him he could read post etc. whatever he needed to see that I'm serious bout recovering. He said if this is what I thought I needed to get better than do it. I am so relieved. A huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders just by coming clean with him. I have decided to take the suboxone route b/c I don't think I could do it c/t again. It just hasn't "stuck" in the past. One of the greatest things is the therapy sessions. I didn't know that would be included, but It will be good for me. Before you guys I never thought I'd be able to tell him, seek outside help, or attend therapy sessions. That's why i owe it all to YOU, Becky, Roe, Michelle, Callie, Catherine, and many others. I know I had to take the initial steps, but wouldn't have done it w/o meeting you guys! I know I'm sounding very redundant, but I just want everybody to know how grateful I am!!!! Thank you from the bottom of my heart!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think we are going to be o.k. Today was our 14th wedding anniversary. i was going to wait to wednesday to tell him, but i just had to get it out monday. I didn't plan it , but it just popped out of my mouth from nowhere. LOL

I hope your mon is doing better. I know you've prob said, but I can't member.....What is wrong with your mother if you don't mind me asking?
15
Lisa
Gotta make calls but wanted you to know your mom & family are in my prayers...
Mj
Sabrina
16
Lisa,

I don't post to you much, but know that you and your family will be in my prayers. You are such a godsend to this board!

-Gentlepeace
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Thank you Sammy for that. It's beautiful. I did get the book you told me about. Ordered it through Amazon. Sue had suggested it as well, I'm anxious to get it.

Thank you everyone else. It's going to be a rough next few months and it's this board and my sponsor that are keeping me clean and sober. So I'll apologize a head of time if I sound a little gruff sometimes....my head is up nmy butt right now and I'm not dealing with my emotions very well.

Rhonda...I got your email, I will return it as soon as I'm done with a few things. I am so happy for you sweetheart. You are truly brave, don't forget that.
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Thanks Lisa. We all get busy and email if you have time. I was just so excited bout finally telling my husband that I couldn't wait to tell you!
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Lisa,
You and your entire family are in my prayers...

QUOTE
So I'll apologize a head of time if I sound a little gruff sometimes....my head is up nmy butt right now and I'm not dealing with my emotions very well.


There is no reason to apologize...and the miracle is you are dealing with your emotions instead of numbing all of this out...it sucks but one day at a time, one step at a time, with the help of others and your HP, you will be okay....We try to do things with as much grace as we can but we're not perfect, now are we? Keep talking and letting it out...don't try to carry the world on your shoulders and remember, it's okay to feel and your feelings are yours....

Now, you owe me a phone call...call me tomorrow....

(((big hugs))))
Love ya,
Stacey