My name is Garry and I have been on pain meds for years, (1996), from an accident. (Two neck operations and an impending back operation.) This summer my I gave my wife "ONE"; (JUST ONE,) of my oxycontins, (80mgs) for a migraine that she had. (I feel so guilty!) For a little over 4 months I kept coming up short on my DR. PRESCIBED oxys.Yesterday I did a "count." I was 20 short! AGAIN! (I just unsually leave them in my medicine chest, but last night I hid them.) Of course, hindsight is 20/20, (my wife having the "Flu" so often,)but this morning I confronted her because she had "the flu" again and called into work sick.She; very tearfully came clean with me and told me "Yes!" It had been HER ALL ALONG THAT WAS STEALING THEM FROM ME! At first I was extremely angry due to ALL the many times "I" had to go through painful withdrawls until the prescription COULD be re-filled! But now I'am very sad and compassionate because if ANYBODY knows what those terrible withdrawls are like; it's ME! She works in a small insurance company where it is just her and her boss. For the last few months her boss has been putting her through hell in an attempt to get her to quit. (Too cheap to pay unemployment NOR insurance for her!) So she only works a 32 hour week so he doesn't HAVE to pay her insurance. I get paltry disability pay, and without HER working and essentially being the main "Bread winner," we will not be able to afford our rent. I KNOW what she is doing is illeagal so I cannot tell my doc. She has NO insurance for the hospital to go through the lengthy detox and even if she DID go to the hospital, we are afraid what whould happen. CERTAINLY she would lose her job. It's a catch 22. Yesterday her boss told her there will be no Christmas bonus so essentially NO Christmas for the kids. (2 Teenager daughters and a 12 year old son.) She STILL SWEARS that she did not take the 20 that are missing. That leaves only one option. (Teenager selling them on the street?) I have thought of going cold-turkey and endure the pain to enable her to keep on taking them to be able to work; but in my heart, I KNOW this is wrong! I wish those DAMN THINGS were NEVER brought into this household and my GUILT is tremendous! (As I write this, "I'am" going through withdrawl, due primarily to the fact that we will be homeless if SHE now doesn't have them versus me.) Can ANYONE provide an answer to this catch 22 delema? Gratefully yours, Garry.
Garry- My guess is she DID take them, but hasn't come clean to you 100%. BUT, she made the first step..and GOOD for you for standing by her.
That is a touchy one. I know the dependence that you can get on opiates...I hope that you two can find a way out...At least she is being honest and that is the first place to start...
Good luck your way,
kerry
Good luck your way,
kerry
garry-
I am so sorry, this must be awful to go through. But you are the one who needs the pills. Not her. w/d's suck, but you do get throught them. I am on day 10 without pills, and I am at work just fine. It is hard to get the motivation to do the work, but you push yourself. Maybe you can find a way to either put the pills where no one can find them but you, and you can control the taper schedule for your wife. Then have her stop on a Thursday. That way she will experience the worst w/d's over the weekend.
Maybe that will help, and I will keep you in my prayers.
-britney
I am so sorry, this must be awful to go through. But you are the one who needs the pills. Not her. w/d's suck, but you do get throught them. I am on day 10 without pills, and I am at work just fine. It is hard to get the motivation to do the work, but you push yourself. Maybe you can find a way to either put the pills where no one can find them but you, and you can control the taper schedule for your wife. Then have her stop on a Thursday. That way she will experience the worst w/d's over the weekend.
Maybe that will help, and I will keep you in my prayers.
-britney
Gary,,,,she probably took the pills. It's a really embarrassing thing to admit....been there. I feel sorry for her, being through withdrawals, but it is only a few days of the "flu".....then on to recovery.....I am on day 27. I had a really bad habit. I went pretty much c/t. I should have gone to rehab, but couldn't. I showed up for work every day and although I wasn't productive I showed up. She is in a horrible position at work, but she needs to be strong for the family..... give her encouragement. tell her to read these posts. We are all the same and have suffered greatly to withdraw. She can do it too.
Kat- What happens when you get the REAL flu, like I did...and am quitting at the same time. I KNOW I had the flu, because my little ones did too and my temp got to 101. Luckily, I feel better..after 8 DAYS....
Danny....I got the real flu right after Thanksgiving. It crossed my mind if I could still having w/d after 27 days....I don't know. That is like a double whammy. I know people have had both at the same time. It sucks.
Gary,
I did the same thing as your wife did. My husband started giving me a couple here and there and then I just started taking them. He would come up short and i would lie my butt off saying I did not take them. Finally itall came to a head. We are no longer together. We would both go through withdrawls every month until he went to the doc. When he went away, I got my own from the same doctor, until recently. I stopped. Weaned and then stopped. I am free now. I wish you all the luck, try to understand her, which what she is doing is not right, it is hard, very very hard not to take them when they are available. I remember searching every where possible to find his hiding places. Get her some help and yourself. Try to wean both of you, then maybe you both will be free of those dang pills. Save your marriage if you can.
lol
bdwife
I did the same thing as your wife did. My husband started giving me a couple here and there and then I just started taking them. He would come up short and i would lie my butt off saying I did not take them. Finally itall came to a head. We are no longer together. We would both go through withdrawls every month until he went to the doc. When he went away, I got my own from the same doctor, until recently. I stopped. Weaned and then stopped. I am free now. I wish you all the luck, try to understand her, which what she is doing is not right, it is hard, very very hard not to take them when they are available. I remember searching every where possible to find his hiding places. Get her some help and yourself. Try to wean both of you, then maybe you both will be free of those dang pills. Save your marriage if you can.
lol
bdwife
