Hey Con...gonna check in here on Thursday to see how your meeting went..hint hint.
I'll tell you about mine tomorrow...
Big hugs...
Granny, you crack me up darlin. Fish are the stupidist creatures on God's green earth..we got some for the kids when they were little and the big fish ate all the little fish and then ate eachother. Ok, so maybe we were the stupid ones, putting the wrong kind of fish together but you would think the guy at the pet store would have said something? Truamatized my children so that was the end of fish. Dogs and horses. Sticking with those.
hey CG,
I grew up on horses,my dad owned a small quarter horse ranch when I was little,put me on a horse at 3. My first horse was a pony named Ladybird. Then I got a little white spotted welsh mare,named Sugar.She passed when I was about 9. I had wanted a pinto or a paint but wound up with a sorrel quarter/arab mix mare named "Twobits". By that time(I was 10) we had moved to a bigger ranch and my father went to race horses.He bred her to one of his thorobred stallions and the colt was born when I was like 12.....Named him Sunny Lads Baby Boy,I called him Laddie. He was tall like a thorobred,had an arab neck and a quarters a**. But he was my buddy...While his mother rolled in the water ,saddle and all with me on her, he LOVED the water.We played in it all the time.
I rode both in a few neighborhood parades, the last in 8th grade...I rode him bareback at the ranch and used a hackamore most times so I didnt have to bother ranch people to get my saddle. I could go anywhere on the ranch except thru closed gates and part of the Santa Ana river runs thru the property so we'd go to the river. I had started to learn to jump a little wih the mare,but when Laddie got older I tried with him. I never went very far...never got into competition...I did like to barrel race...I spent most of the time pretending to live in the old days...and trying to perfect running and jumping on his back from behind and sliding into the saddle like the get-away guys did...LOL.
Not living full time with my dad full time had alot to do with the fact I never really went far in life I think. Mom was alcoholic..If I'd of lived with my dad all the time my life would be very different from what it turned out to be I think...My brother and sister did very well.......I also believe my dad was the one who went ahead with my adoption while mom wasnt too hip on the idea.To her I was always "your daughter"especially if I got in trouble.LOL.Once my sister was born(moms first live birth)I was doomed.....
As I grew older I lost interest for the most part and getting PG at 17 didnt help.Then came the bad relationships,bad marriage,another child....I threw it all away.....Dad died about 6 years ago and his last wife still lives on the ranch even though there are no horses there any more. He was very proud of it,called it Granja Vista del Rio...The farm with the view of the river.....
How are you involved with your horses?? What kind and how many do you have???My GD loves them...I wish I had the access to them like I did when I was little...Wish she could experience what I had...There arent many stables left around here....
Boy,I hadnt thought about all that in a long time.......Time for her to start class...
I grew up on horses,my dad owned a small quarter horse ranch when I was little,put me on a horse at 3. My first horse was a pony named Ladybird. Then I got a little white spotted welsh mare,named Sugar.She passed when I was about 9. I had wanted a pinto or a paint but wound up with a sorrel quarter/arab mix mare named "Twobits". By that time(I was 10) we had moved to a bigger ranch and my father went to race horses.He bred her to one of his thorobred stallions and the colt was born when I was like 12.....Named him Sunny Lads Baby Boy,I called him Laddie. He was tall like a thorobred,had an arab neck and a quarters a**. But he was my buddy...While his mother rolled in the water ,saddle and all with me on her, he LOVED the water.We played in it all the time.
I rode both in a few neighborhood parades, the last in 8th grade...I rode him bareback at the ranch and used a hackamore most times so I didnt have to bother ranch people to get my saddle. I could go anywhere on the ranch except thru closed gates and part of the Santa Ana river runs thru the property so we'd go to the river. I had started to learn to jump a little wih the mare,but when Laddie got older I tried with him. I never went very far...never got into competition...I did like to barrel race...I spent most of the time pretending to live in the old days...and trying to perfect running and jumping on his back from behind and sliding into the saddle like the get-away guys did...LOL.
Not living full time with my dad full time had alot to do with the fact I never really went far in life I think. Mom was alcoholic..If I'd of lived with my dad all the time my life would be very different from what it turned out to be I think...My brother and sister did very well.......I also believe my dad was the one who went ahead with my adoption while mom wasnt too hip on the idea.To her I was always "your daughter"especially if I got in trouble.LOL.Once my sister was born(moms first live birth)I was doomed.....
As I grew older I lost interest for the most part and getting PG at 17 didnt help.Then came the bad relationships,bad marriage,another child....I threw it all away.....Dad died about 6 years ago and his last wife still lives on the ranch even though there are no horses there any more. He was very proud of it,called it Granja Vista del Rio...The farm with the view of the river.....
How are you involved with your horses?? What kind and how many do you have???My GD loves them...I wish I had the access to them like I did when I was little...Wish she could experience what I had...There arent many stables left around here....
Boy,I hadnt thought about all that in a long time.......Time for her to start class...
Methadone is a life saver it gives addicts a stable and normal life however it doesn't stop ur brain thinkin bout smack which is why some people end up on both(me) I am on 60mls of meth,I woz on 110mls and I woz clean so I decided I'd been clean long enough that id come off my methadone as well (I've been on it 8 years) so I started a very fast reduction down to 30 MLS which was when I relapsed I am using every day and I've realised that it doesn't matter if I'm on methadone for the rest of my god damn life as long as I'm clean ?!? which is what I'm desperately working on,I don't want to rely on heroin to feel good but when I don't use I feel deeply depressed.I want to take pleasure in the things that I enjoy,normal things..good food,my beautiful 8 year old sons jokes that don't make sense or my 3 year old sons faux pas eg." Mummy this butter isn't mental,I want it mental"(melted!) But its so hard...
Have you considered suboxone? It has the side benefit of treating depression. That said, it is pretty common for addicts to feel depressed because their brains are wired from using not to derive pleasure without the drug...hence cravings.
Peace ~ MomNMore
Peace ~ MomNMore
Hi Jenny,
Ya know someone asked me the other day why I was still on methadone since I have been clean for 18+ years. My answer was because I want to stay clean longer than that.For some,methadone is a life saver and they stay on it for the rest of their lives. For others,they choose the 21 day detox or the 180 day detox.Some make it after detoxing,some dont. Its all how you see it,how you feel about it and how you let other peoples ideas about it affect your decision as to whether you should or want to stay on it or not. It should be a very personal choice,not one made by the personal wants of well meaning friends or family members. I am on 105 mg which is a little high for me now,while my husband is on 20mg. I don't see it as replacing one drug for another...I dont "feel" the methadone I take, & I don't get high on it.The decision to take it should be your own.I do know the longer you are on it,along with your own history of using may dictate how easily it would be for you to eventually detox off methadone should you at some point choose to do so.At this point in my life I have no plans on detoxing any time soon as I am happy right where I am.
The important thing is to get to a dose that is right for you AND STAY THERE. Your dose should be high enough so if you fix you dont feel it and enough so you don't crave opiates. You know how good life can be when you arent out there hustlin' and your 2 little ones deserve a good mom...a clean mom. I am raising my two 15 yr old grandkids and if it werent for methadone I wouldnt of even been alive to be around for their births.
Think long and hard.
Granny
Ya know someone asked me the other day why I was still on methadone since I have been clean for 18+ years. My answer was because I want to stay clean longer than that.For some,methadone is a life saver and they stay on it for the rest of their lives. For others,they choose the 21 day detox or the 180 day detox.Some make it after detoxing,some dont. Its all how you see it,how you feel about it and how you let other peoples ideas about it affect your decision as to whether you should or want to stay on it or not. It should be a very personal choice,not one made by the personal wants of well meaning friends or family members. I am on 105 mg which is a little high for me now,while my husband is on 20mg. I don't see it as replacing one drug for another...I dont "feel" the methadone I take, & I don't get high on it.The decision to take it should be your own.I do know the longer you are on it,along with your own history of using may dictate how easily it would be for you to eventually detox off methadone should you at some point choose to do so.At this point in my life I have no plans on detoxing any time soon as I am happy right where I am.
The important thing is to get to a dose that is right for you AND STAY THERE. Your dose should be high enough so if you fix you dont feel it and enough so you don't crave opiates. You know how good life can be when you arent out there hustlin' and your 2 little ones deserve a good mom...a clean mom. I am raising my two 15 yr old grandkids and if it werent for methadone I wouldnt of even been alive to be around for their births.
Think long and hard.
Granny
Yes I agree,the English version of suboxone is subutex and I've been on it before but I had to get reduced rite down to 11ml to do the switch and when I was on it I didn't even THINK about drugs,for me it was a complete brain blocker plus u know if you use u won't get anythin from it but stupidly I got with a user after being clean for 2 1/2 years and I stopped taking them and started selling them but I am determined to get clean now I am in a 'using couple' and I am seriously thinkin we need 2 separate whilst we detox,I can't even do it myself he is scoring,cooking it up and injecting ME so if he wasn't here I just would NOT use..but he is the father of my kids and we've bin together for a long time....
So who takes care of the children while you are doping up or letting him dope you up? Most using relationships do not end being healthy once one or both parties get into recovery...it's rare.
Peace ~ MomNMore
Peace ~ MomNMore
They are in bed and I don't get off my head,ever.I do it so I'm not poorly.I thought the point of all this was that people don't judge,my mistake.just because I'm an addict it does not mean I'm a not good mother,cos I know for fact that I am I just want to be better for my kids
Methadone and heroin,such a weird couple.
We still have no manager at our clinic like 6 months and counting. They have assigned a manager from another clinic to us...not quite the same,but it'll do. I spoke to the counselors and the manager,being an advocate and all and have finally gotten their attention about our needing more support from them. Last Sept,some of you may remember,my other 1/2 and I were invited to the Corporate office of our clinic about the possibility of becoming corporate PAAG members.(Patient Advisory and Advocacy Group) Well they have been so busy that kinda fell by the wayside but at that meeting they also talked to us about implementing a new 5 day intervention for new patients.
I dont know about you but the day I chose to go on methadone was a big day for me.But ya feel like crap. You are sick,at least I was,and you want nothing more than to get your dose of methadone. Once that is done you are good to go. You no longer need to worry about where the $$ are going to come from to get your dope for the day so you wont be sick.All the baggage that goes with using is put into the closet for the first time in forever. All you need to do is wait for the next day to come...to go get your dose. As the days turn into weeks and the weeks into months things in your life begin to change. You have a life,and not one that revolves around lying,cheating,boosting,stealing and figuring out how to get money to buy the dope to make you feel better,every single minute of the day. Methadone lasts up to 24 hours or more.
This new 5 day intervention was a brilliant idea,it just took a while to get it working into the clinics. Starting with the first day, It usually takes anywhere from 5 to 8 hours to get everything done,paperwork,exams,dr.visit and get that first dose of methadone to the patient. And those few hours can seem like a lifetime when you are the one waiting .The 5 day intervention is making it possible to be dosed in as little as 2-3 hours and the rest of the intake is done over the next 4 days. I know I sure as hell didnt feel like talking to anyone,nor could I remember anything the staff wanted to know. Once I had my dose and no longer felt sick I was a bit more able to help finish my enrollment.
The bottom line is now that our clinic has started implementing this I hope good things come from it. The counselors have also started sending new patients to our Wed 6am K2R meeting.We have our regulars too.
After more than a year of volunteering our time for the patients at our clinic as PAAG members and patient advocates people are finally starting to recognize us and ask for our help with clinic problems and concerns. There is one patient there who doses daily and if it weren't for the fact that he uses every day he would be the perfect advocate. He is outspoken,well known and liked by the patients and he is at the clinic everyday,unlike us. He too comes to our weekly meeting and is constantly referring patients to us.
Well enough said for today. Have a great weekend and A special hey to Con,(we miss you),MoM,momg,Cowgirl,Jack & Jessie.
We still have no manager at our clinic like 6 months and counting. They have assigned a manager from another clinic to us...not quite the same,but it'll do. I spoke to the counselors and the manager,being an advocate and all and have finally gotten their attention about our needing more support from them. Last Sept,some of you may remember,my other 1/2 and I were invited to the Corporate office of our clinic about the possibility of becoming corporate PAAG members.(Patient Advisory and Advocacy Group) Well they have been so busy that kinda fell by the wayside but at that meeting they also talked to us about implementing a new 5 day intervention for new patients.
I dont know about you but the day I chose to go on methadone was a big day for me.But ya feel like crap. You are sick,at least I was,and you want nothing more than to get your dose of methadone. Once that is done you are good to go. You no longer need to worry about where the $$ are going to come from to get your dope for the day so you wont be sick.All the baggage that goes with using is put into the closet for the first time in forever. All you need to do is wait for the next day to come...to go get your dose. As the days turn into weeks and the weeks into months things in your life begin to change. You have a life,and not one that revolves around lying,cheating,boosting,stealing and figuring out how to get money to buy the dope to make you feel better,every single minute of the day. Methadone lasts up to 24 hours or more.
This new 5 day intervention was a brilliant idea,it just took a while to get it working into the clinics. Starting with the first day, It usually takes anywhere from 5 to 8 hours to get everything done,paperwork,exams,dr.visit and get that first dose of methadone to the patient. And those few hours can seem like a lifetime when you are the one waiting .The 5 day intervention is making it possible to be dosed in as little as 2-3 hours and the rest of the intake is done over the next 4 days. I know I sure as hell didnt feel like talking to anyone,nor could I remember anything the staff wanted to know. Once I had my dose and no longer felt sick I was a bit more able to help finish my enrollment.
The bottom line is now that our clinic has started implementing this I hope good things come from it. The counselors have also started sending new patients to our Wed 6am K2R meeting.We have our regulars too.
After more than a year of volunteering our time for the patients at our clinic as PAAG members and patient advocates people are finally starting to recognize us and ask for our help with clinic problems and concerns. There is one patient there who doses daily and if it weren't for the fact that he uses every day he would be the perfect advocate. He is outspoken,well known and liked by the patients and he is at the clinic everyday,unlike us. He too comes to our weekly meeting and is constantly referring patients to us.
Well enough said for today. Have a great weekend and A special hey to Con,(we miss you),MoM,momg,Cowgirl,Jack & Jessie.
Jenny, I don't judge, I just asked a question...I know about using to 'stay well' but it's still troubling that there are drugs in the house (and being used in the house) with children around...my opinion, my feelings...I state them is all.
Granny and all the ladies, Happy Mother's Day one and all. Granny, especially you with all you do to keep the second generation from a bad place. Mad respect for you, ma'am...truly...big props.
Love ~ M&M
Granny and all the ladies, Happy Mother's Day one and all. Granny, especially you with all you do to keep the second generation from a bad place. Mad respect for you, ma'am...truly...big props.
Love ~ M&M
Well I am only on the defensive because I am ashamed myself,nobody can tell me stuff I don't already know which is why I want to change.In England the drugs are weak to say the least I suppose they have a lot further to travel from the original source and are cut with god knows what along the way,I haven't felt an effect off drugs for years.I know 'mothers' who shoot up in front of their kids.I just know it goes on,I remember once when I was 16 I went to a house with my then boyf(he used,I hadn't at this point) and a woman said to me "will u just keep *the baby on your lap,she doenst like it when I have a hit" she started shooting up in her arm whilst her 2 year old was hysterically shouting "no mummy please dont" it made me feel sick and I ran out crying...I just mean my kids are normal kids they are protected from my addiction but ofcourse I would be a much better mum if I wasn't an addict,I am getting there slowly but surely...
3 days clean,thanks 2 methadone truly a life saver!! Also on anti depressants but they're not habit forming according to doc,well gotta go 2 college now just wanted 2 share my progress thanks 4 ur advice and support!! peace n luv Jen x
I think methode makes it worse. Iwas a user of methode and couldnt enjoy life on it. what they dont tell u is that it stays in your bone marrow andis the hardest drug to detox from. Methode is a bad idea. Kepp her in treatment far away from her friends and change numbers
Girltoday,
Welcome to the methadone board. I see you visited the heroin board as well.
I'm not sure where you get your information, but methadone does NOT get into your bones,far from it. Methadone is one of the most studied medicines on the planet and is safe to take,but is not for everyone.There are so many "myths" surrounding methadone and they have all been shown to be false. Many are written in this methadone board. For many,me included, it was a life saver and I cant imagine,I shudder to think, where I'd be today had it not been here for me and countless others.
The main reason I fought for this board,the methadone message board ,to be added to this site was so people could come to this already wonderful website and get their questions about methadone answered in an open,friendly and most importantly of all,truthful way. The stigma about methadone has gotten a bit better over the years but we are still a long way from folks accepting it as a "real" medicine. People CAN live a normal life on this drug. Just the harm reduction is impressive.
While my story may differ from others ,the bottom line is that we were addicted to heroin and our lives were unmanagable. Without methadones help I had no life, not anymore. My heroin addiction took everything from me,friends,family,nearly my kids,my house,personal possessions and then very nearly my life.Since the day I went on methadone I never looked back and have been clean 18+ years. I now Have a life. I own my own home,I drive a nice car,I have money in the bank and I recently became my oldest grandchildrens legal guardian. They are 15 and I am so grateful to be clean and sober so I could step up and help them.
I see methadone no different than taking my high blood pressure medicine, my water pill or any other doctor prescribed meds I may take. I dont get high,nor do I feel high.
Allowing time to find the right dose of methadone for each individual patient and following the clinic rules to a tee, heroin addicts have a very good chance of staying clean. It wont happen overnight or the next week and it takes work to get where you want to be,but it will work if you let it.
If you go over some of the topics here on the methadone board,you will see one that says "methadone,teeth,weight,liver,immune system"....it has a few of the "myths" listed there as well...
Granny
Welcome to the methadone board. I see you visited the heroin board as well.
I'm not sure where you get your information, but methadone does NOT get into your bones,far from it. Methadone is one of the most studied medicines on the planet and is safe to take,but is not for everyone.There are so many "myths" surrounding methadone and they have all been shown to be false. Many are written in this methadone board. For many,me included, it was a life saver and I cant imagine,I shudder to think, where I'd be today had it not been here for me and countless others.
The main reason I fought for this board,the methadone message board ,to be added to this site was so people could come to this already wonderful website and get their questions about methadone answered in an open,friendly and most importantly of all,truthful way. The stigma about methadone has gotten a bit better over the years but we are still a long way from folks accepting it as a "real" medicine. People CAN live a normal life on this drug. Just the harm reduction is impressive.
While my story may differ from others ,the bottom line is that we were addicted to heroin and our lives were unmanagable. Without methadones help I had no life, not anymore. My heroin addiction took everything from me,friends,family,nearly my kids,my house,personal possessions and then very nearly my life.Since the day I went on methadone I never looked back and have been clean 18+ years. I now Have a life. I own my own home,I drive a nice car,I have money in the bank and I recently became my oldest grandchildrens legal guardian. They are 15 and I am so grateful to be clean and sober so I could step up and help them.
I see methadone no different than taking my high blood pressure medicine, my water pill or any other doctor prescribed meds I may take. I dont get high,nor do I feel high.
Allowing time to find the right dose of methadone for each individual patient and following the clinic rules to a tee, heroin addicts have a very good chance of staying clean. It wont happen overnight or the next week and it takes work to get where you want to be,but it will work if you let it.
If you go over some of the topics here on the methadone board,you will see one that says "methadone,teeth,weight,liver,immune system"....it has a few of the "myths" listed there as well...
Granny
Yay, granny! You tell it, lady!
I must have been misinformed cause the nurse at the treatment center i went to told me that. It did help me. I just needed help getting off it. The clinc i went to couldve cared less as long as they were paid and when i lost my job i had no money to pay for it i had to do something. I was on 15 and i never went over 50. SORRY GUYS!!!!!!!
Girltoday,
I didnt mean to come on so strong,its just that after all these years and all the good methadone has done ,it still irks me to no end that there are still professional people out there that dont take the time,or dont want to TAKE the time to get their facts straight before they throw out incorrect info at folks in crisis who are looking for a way to help stop their opiate addictions, methadone being one of those ways. Because of their ignorance addicts may believe incorectly that methadone causes more harm than good which is not the case.
Like I have said before, while methadone may not be for everyone,at least if the correct facts are laid out that person can make an educated choice on what treatment they would like to try.
Granny
I understand. Ive read some of your post and you seem to be very friendly. I didnt take it in a bad way. No worries here. Thanks for your support.
Girltoday,
I AM a nice person...LMFAO. No seriously. Anytime I can be of help,let me know. There are lots of wonderful people here...I dump on them all the time. You should learn to do it too.Its all good.
Have a great day sweetie.
Granny
I AM a nice person...LMFAO. No seriously. Anytime I can be of help,let me know. There are lots of wonderful people here...I dump on them all the time. You should learn to do it too.Its all good.
Have a great day sweetie.
Granny
Hey everyone!
I'm a 26 year old and am currently taking 19mg of methadone daily. Its been 3 years on it, a little over a year ago I was at 120 mg. Went cold turkey for 8 days and couldn't take it so I got back on 40(I wasn't ready to quit at time). Those 8 days sucked so bad. But I'm here. And I've been slowly tapering off. I currently drop 2mg a month( I wanted 4-5 clinic said no, go figure). I was a heroin user from 2008-2012. Took subs after that. And then I lost my insurance and went to the methadone clinic. Big mistake. This has been harder then dope. Everywhere I go or anything I do revolves around it. And I'm just over it!! I was planning on dropping to 10 and stopping.. Any suggestions?
I'm a 26 year old and am currently taking 19mg of methadone daily. Its been 3 years on it, a little over a year ago I was at 120 mg. Went cold turkey for 8 days and couldn't take it so I got back on 40(I wasn't ready to quit at time). Those 8 days sucked so bad. But I'm here. And I've been slowly tapering off. I currently drop 2mg a month( I wanted 4-5 clinic said no, go figure). I was a heroin user from 2008-2012. Took subs after that. And then I lost my insurance and went to the methadone clinic. Big mistake. This has been harder then dope. Everywhere I go or anything I do revolves around it. And I'm just over it!! I was planning on dropping to 10 and stopping.. Any suggestions?
