| QUOTE |
| I have gone thru some much sh*t with this addiction, I am bouncing checks left and right, I am on the verge of losing my house, and the list goes on and on, common sense says "what the f*ck" but my common sense has long flown the coupe. |
Been there.
Sometimes it's not easy to accept the fact that we all are still a bunch of high bottom addicts.We have computers and can log on and chat.The phone line continues to get paid,we are still in a house with 4 walls albeit late on the payments.LOL
I've been to some meetings where the guys had no homes to go to.They either slept on the streets,the YMCA or crashed on a couch at the local AA club.The insanity was that some of them still didn't feel like they had reached their bottom.
The most joyful I feel is when I see young people coming in that have their whole life ahead of them.They realize thay have a disease and it will get much worse.I wasn't one of those guys.I had to take the train down the tracks a lot further.All of us have the capacity to stop this insanity at any stop we choose.
It has nothing to do with common sense or the lack of it.It's not a moral dillema or a character flaw.It's a powerful disease that grows exponentially with each relapse.
You can do this Dawn.You're not weak but powerless.There is a difference.You might have to get mad at God and scream for awhile.That's o.k.Your Higher Power has never abandoned you.It's waiting for you to ask for help.It's waiting for you to reach out and accept help from other addicts who've been there.Through those other recovering addicts will come the message.
This is not about religion.It's about a spiritual connection that's been in play for many years.It can be the beginning of a lasting peace.
I hope you reach for help.
Good Luck
