I am quickly educating myself on heroin addiction, rehab, recovery and anything else I can read pertaining to this subject because I have found out that my 20 yr old daughter is addicted. For me, hearing advice & true life experiences have helped me put this into perspective than most of the web info I have found; thank you very much for sharing with me & with each other; I feel very alone in this battle at present as I am recently divorced & feel that her father has somewhat detached himself from the situation; now, I need to ask your advice: my daughter is living on the west coast of US & I am living on the east coast; she has been there for 4 months & a week ago was kicked out of her roommates house for using heroin; that explains all the desparate calls for money, the crazy stories etc etc etc...I'm sure you know the deal; I feel so stupid that I did not. since being kicked out, she has basically been living on the streets because I just can't send her money to make her habit only worse; I have however, booked a couple of hotel rooms online to give her a place to stay for the night; today, she called; is (I think) going thru w/drawal, said she was going to check herself into a hospital & would call me when she can; I am so frightened & sick w/worry; I am not sure what to do & how to handle this & would appreciate anything you can tell me; my funds are very limited since the divorce & I would hop on a plane & go find her if I could but , how do I know she will come w/me even if I can find her? she has not admitted to me that she has a heroin addiction....just continue to make up stories to cover & explain her downward spiral; I love her so much & want to help her....please help me.
Hi, frightened mom. Make sure you post on the families board..lots of parents there to help you. I'll put an SOS out to susan..her son was a heroin addict. In the meantime, know that we've all felt as you do...sick with fear and worry and we found comfort and help here. luv corrinne
I'm so sorry for you and your daughter. I know my mom was drove crasy with me and my brother both using. That is a GREAT ideal to not send her cash. I lied to my mom telling her I had to pay this/that bill I owned this guy/girl my kids were STARVING you name it I said it. There is not much I can say to ease your worry. If she is willing to go to a rehad that will help the most. Keep us updated on new news. The family board on here is full of great advice and supportive people.
Hi, Zerogirl. thanks for being honest. It sure helps us parents when former addicts fill us in on their own pasts. I learned so much from people on here who were willing to be honest. thank you. corrinne
Dear Frightened Mom,
I've been EXACTLY where you are. I KNOW your heartache. I know how stupid I felt that I got lied to and manipulated into helping my son financially.
Here is some of my story.....
I came here because my then 29 year old son started on vicodin, then tried oxycontin (synthetic heroin) and got hooked immediately. He later switched to heroin. Believe me, I never thought in a million years that one of my children would be a heroin addict or have a criminal record! He was living in an apartment and wasn't visiting home much, but we blamed that on the new girlfriend. We thought she was just the possessive type. Then he started to not be able to hold a job. He started to call to ask for money to pay his bills with one excuse or another. When he lost still another job, I asked him if he had a drug problem. He told me he HAD had one, but he had gotten off the stuff. We started to help him more with his bills. (We were VERY naive!)
One night he was really scared about his girlfriend. He said she went out with some girls from work and he was worried because they said some guy had been coming on to her all night and then all of a sudden she disappeared. She didn't answer her cell phone either. We were out searching for her all over the place! Then around 5:00 or 6:00 in the morning, we went to their apartment. I was shocked to see his table FULL of mail...unopened important mail. I packed up the mail in a box with his permission and it was so bad that I acually got my first anxiety attack when I was opening it. He was about $30,000 in debt in addition to the $20,000 loan he already had, couldn't hold a job, he hadn't renewed his license and registration (part of the unopened mail), and he got cited for it quite a few times (those citations weren't responded to). They couldn't get out of their $800/mo. lease, and we started to lend them the money for that.
We found some evidence they were still using, and said we would only continue paying the rent if they each moved back home and got some help to stop. Reluctantly they did. My son started to tell me he was going to hang out with some old (predrug) buddies, and later I found out they were lies. He was out drugging. He wrote bad checks to get money for the drugs (we had to clear those because we were on his account too), then started stealing. (Before the drugs there was no breaking of the law except for a few speeding tickets.) He got arrested several times. His truck was broken down (and he had no money to get it fixed) and we hid our extra truck from him at his grandmother's vacant condo. He found the keys we had hidden and figured out where it was. He took it without our permission to do his stealing and get his drugs. When he didn't have either truck, the dealer provided one (that was stolen by another addict) for the job and threatened bodily harm to one of his loved ones if he didn't do the job.
The first time he got into BIG trouble (over $1000 retail theft, unauthorized taking of a vehicle, driving under the influence of drugs, and possession), the judge recommended that we not post bail to give him a chance to detox in jail. We realized he could have killed himself or some other innocent person driving under the influence of drugs and then he would be in prison for the rest of his life and there would be nothing we could do. My son had pretty much convinced my husband that he would be good if we let him come home, but I had been the one out riding around looking for my son and I realized he wasn't listening to ANYONE. My son could see my reluctance, and he hugged me and begged me not to make him detox in jail. A strength came to me from God and I said, "I love you so much but we have to keep you safe." I literally collapsed when they lead him away to go back to jail. It was the hardest thing I have ever had to do! My son told me later that as much as he didn't want to go to jail and it was one of the worst county prisons around, it was the best thing we could have done for him.
He agreed to pretrial services to get out of prison on the day of his preliminary hearing. He came home and went on suboxone and was doing well for a while. Then his girlfriend (who we later learned was a heroin addict on and off for 8 years) came off her methadone treatment cold turkey and begged him to get her something. This pulled him back into the drugs. He was arrested for retail theft again, and this time the officer cared enough to talk to him like a big brother rather than acting like he was the "scum of the earth" as other officers had done and he talked him into going to rehab. He went to inpatient at White Deer Run of Allenwood (near Williamsport, PA). Then to a partial, then to intensive outpatient while doing his 90 meetings in 90 days. Shortly after the 90 meetings, he stopped going to meetings and started to actually hang out with his old (predrug) friends. He had a LOT of legal consequences to deal with and he's been on probation and paying fines for a year. The legal issues were tough to deal with, but I kept saying to myself, "They will be what they will be, at least he's ALIVE!" He's still doing that and he has 14 months heroin free TODAY! Praise God!
The counselors feel that he was self-medicating depression with alcohol when he met this last girlfriend. When his bills kept climbing for the alcohol, he tried to stop but I think the girlfriend used that opportunity to introduce him to the pills. My son always provides well for his girlfriends so I think she figured she'd get him hooked and then he would provide hers too.
Here are some things I have learned along this VERY PAINFUL journey....
YOU didn't cause this, YOU can't control this, YOU can't cure it, and YOU can't love her enough to make her stop. There is little you can do to help your daughter. Most have to reach some type of "bottom" before they are able to reach out for the help they desperately need. Pray unceasingly for her to stay safe until she is ready for recovery.
You need to go to meetings for yourself and keep posting here. You need as much support and understanding as you can. None of your family or friends can understand what you're going through unless they've experienced it.
Protect your valuables, e.g., checkbooks, bank statements, charge cards, charge statements, stocks, bonds, jewelry, electronics, collectibles, tools, etc. My jewelry is still in the safe!
Don't believe a word the addict says until they SHOW by their actions that they are in recovery.
Even if they are living with you...even if they're in the next room...YOU can't keep them safe. If they want to use, they will find a way! I know it makes you feel bad to think of her on the streets but there's really nothing you can do for her except pray and try not enable her until she's ready. Unfortunately for some living on the streets is their bottom which they have to reach. For my son, he used is brain to cheat stores out of money to support his habit. He got caught 5 times and has consequences for his actions.
Addiction happens even in the BEST of families. My son couldn't be more loved. He was raised in a good Christian home with both parents. It doesn't make any difference. He made a bad choice to use a drug that QUICKLY took control of him and threatened to steal his very soul. Thank God through prayer, the support and advice of this board, some NA meetings, and my son's perseverance (once he reached his bottom) to get his life back we are all doing well again. There were times I didn't think this day would come, but we have to hang on for dear life to the hope that they will!
I am here for you and will help in any way I can. You were wise NOT to send her money. I understand how much you want to protect her and know at least for the night that she's safe somewhere, but do you have a way of knowing if SHE is staying in the rooms that you secure for her? They are so shrewd she might be selling the room for the night to someone to get drug money. They will do ANYTHING to get their drugs!
Let's pray right now for your daughter...
Dear Jesus,
You know better than us what is best for Frightened Mom's precious daughter. We place her in your loving hands and ask you to watch over her and send your angels to protect her from harm until she reaches her bottom and reaches out for the help she desperately needs to overcome her addiction. In your name we rebuke any and all evil spirits lingering in and around her and command that they return to hell where they belong. Fill her daughter with your wisdom, your strength, and your love to help her to get her life back. In your name we pray. Amen.
God bless!
Susan
I've been EXACTLY where you are. I KNOW your heartache. I know how stupid I felt that I got lied to and manipulated into helping my son financially.
Here is some of my story.....
I came here because my then 29 year old son started on vicodin, then tried oxycontin (synthetic heroin) and got hooked immediately. He later switched to heroin. Believe me, I never thought in a million years that one of my children would be a heroin addict or have a criminal record! He was living in an apartment and wasn't visiting home much, but we blamed that on the new girlfriend. We thought she was just the possessive type. Then he started to not be able to hold a job. He started to call to ask for money to pay his bills with one excuse or another. When he lost still another job, I asked him if he had a drug problem. He told me he HAD had one, but he had gotten off the stuff. We started to help him more with his bills. (We were VERY naive!)
One night he was really scared about his girlfriend. He said she went out with some girls from work and he was worried because they said some guy had been coming on to her all night and then all of a sudden she disappeared. She didn't answer her cell phone either. We were out searching for her all over the place! Then around 5:00 or 6:00 in the morning, we went to their apartment. I was shocked to see his table FULL of mail...unopened important mail. I packed up the mail in a box with his permission and it was so bad that I acually got my first anxiety attack when I was opening it. He was about $30,000 in debt in addition to the $20,000 loan he already had, couldn't hold a job, he hadn't renewed his license and registration (part of the unopened mail), and he got cited for it quite a few times (those citations weren't responded to). They couldn't get out of their $800/mo. lease, and we started to lend them the money for that.
We found some evidence they were still using, and said we would only continue paying the rent if they each moved back home and got some help to stop. Reluctantly they did. My son started to tell me he was going to hang out with some old (predrug) buddies, and later I found out they were lies. He was out drugging. He wrote bad checks to get money for the drugs (we had to clear those because we were on his account too), then started stealing. (Before the drugs there was no breaking of the law except for a few speeding tickets.) He got arrested several times. His truck was broken down (and he had no money to get it fixed) and we hid our extra truck from him at his grandmother's vacant condo. He found the keys we had hidden and figured out where it was. He took it without our permission to do his stealing and get his drugs. When he didn't have either truck, the dealer provided one (that was stolen by another addict) for the job and threatened bodily harm to one of his loved ones if he didn't do the job.
The first time he got into BIG trouble (over $1000 retail theft, unauthorized taking of a vehicle, driving under the influence of drugs, and possession), the judge recommended that we not post bail to give him a chance to detox in jail. We realized he could have killed himself or some other innocent person driving under the influence of drugs and then he would be in prison for the rest of his life and there would be nothing we could do. My son had pretty much convinced my husband that he would be good if we let him come home, but I had been the one out riding around looking for my son and I realized he wasn't listening to ANYONE. My son could see my reluctance, and he hugged me and begged me not to make him detox in jail. A strength came to me from God and I said, "I love you so much but we have to keep you safe." I literally collapsed when they lead him away to go back to jail. It was the hardest thing I have ever had to do! My son told me later that as much as he didn't want to go to jail and it was one of the worst county prisons around, it was the best thing we could have done for him.
He agreed to pretrial services to get out of prison on the day of his preliminary hearing. He came home and went on suboxone and was doing well for a while. Then his girlfriend (who we later learned was a heroin addict on and off for 8 years) came off her methadone treatment cold turkey and begged him to get her something. This pulled him back into the drugs. He was arrested for retail theft again, and this time the officer cared enough to talk to him like a big brother rather than acting like he was the "scum of the earth" as other officers had done and he talked him into going to rehab. He went to inpatient at White Deer Run of Allenwood (near Williamsport, PA). Then to a partial, then to intensive outpatient while doing his 90 meetings in 90 days. Shortly after the 90 meetings, he stopped going to meetings and started to actually hang out with his old (predrug) friends. He had a LOT of legal consequences to deal with and he's been on probation and paying fines for a year. The legal issues were tough to deal with, but I kept saying to myself, "They will be what they will be, at least he's ALIVE!" He's still doing that and he has 14 months heroin free TODAY! Praise God!
The counselors feel that he was self-medicating depression with alcohol when he met this last girlfriend. When his bills kept climbing for the alcohol, he tried to stop but I think the girlfriend used that opportunity to introduce him to the pills. My son always provides well for his girlfriends so I think she figured she'd get him hooked and then he would provide hers too.
Here are some things I have learned along this VERY PAINFUL journey....
YOU didn't cause this, YOU can't control this, YOU can't cure it, and YOU can't love her enough to make her stop. There is little you can do to help your daughter. Most have to reach some type of "bottom" before they are able to reach out for the help they desperately need. Pray unceasingly for her to stay safe until she is ready for recovery.
You need to go to meetings for yourself and keep posting here. You need as much support and understanding as you can. None of your family or friends can understand what you're going through unless they've experienced it.
Protect your valuables, e.g., checkbooks, bank statements, charge cards, charge statements, stocks, bonds, jewelry, electronics, collectibles, tools, etc. My jewelry is still in the safe!
Don't believe a word the addict says until they SHOW by their actions that they are in recovery.
Even if they are living with you...even if they're in the next room...YOU can't keep them safe. If they want to use, they will find a way! I know it makes you feel bad to think of her on the streets but there's really nothing you can do for her except pray and try not enable her until she's ready. Unfortunately for some living on the streets is their bottom which they have to reach. For my son, he used is brain to cheat stores out of money to support his habit. He got caught 5 times and has consequences for his actions.
Addiction happens even in the BEST of families. My son couldn't be more loved. He was raised in a good Christian home with both parents. It doesn't make any difference. He made a bad choice to use a drug that QUICKLY took control of him and threatened to steal his very soul. Thank God through prayer, the support and advice of this board, some NA meetings, and my son's perseverance (once he reached his bottom) to get his life back we are all doing well again. There were times I didn't think this day would come, but we have to hang on for dear life to the hope that they will!
I am here for you and will help in any way I can. You were wise NOT to send her money. I understand how much you want to protect her and know at least for the night that she's safe somewhere, but do you have a way of knowing if SHE is staying in the rooms that you secure for her? They are so shrewd she might be selling the room for the night to someone to get drug money. They will do ANYTHING to get their drugs!
Let's pray right now for your daughter...
Dear Jesus,
You know better than us what is best for Frightened Mom's precious daughter. We place her in your loving hands and ask you to watch over her and send your angels to protect her from harm until she reaches her bottom and reaches out for the help she desperately needs to overcome her addiction. In your name we rebuke any and all evil spirits lingering in and around her and command that they return to hell where they belong. Fill her daughter with your wisdom, your strength, and your love to help her to get her life back. In your name we pray. Amen.
God bless!
Susan
H my my name is bruce and i am an addict.If my dad gave me money it only went to dope so i dont recommend sending her any but i would be worried too.dont let me scare you but i have known girls on the street.Men usually turn to robbery in one form or another and so do women but they also turn to prostitution sometimes. If you can send her a plane ticket home (if she cant cash it in) and get her home as soon as possible.let her know that you know what she is doing and love her anyway and will help her through this.You must get her back before you loose her to this disease for good if it was my son i would take out a loan if i had to! I know the nature of the beast.This disease is ugly and it dosent discriminate.I will say a prayer for her and you.
God bless,
God bless,
thank you so much heartache, zerogirl77, bruceb & susan for replying to my message; susan, you have been there & back and I am so happy for you and your son right now; I look forward (hopefully) to the day I can maybe help someone after having been thru this horrible ordeal; right now I can only think about her & where she is tonight...have been waiting by the phone, but still no call...there is no way I can call her...she mentioned earlier that her phone was dead & she had left the charger at her boyfriend's house (who I think is also addicted) I just hope she is safe in a hospital....I will find a way to go to the west coast to find her soon...there is so much I want to say to her....just hope it is not too late.
Freightened Mom, it is never too late. My name is Lois and my nineteen year old son is addicted to heroin as well. At present, he has started a methadone program to try and rapidly detox. It has been a week. Susan, Corrine, myself and many others routinely post on the family board. We derive a lot of support from each other. I, as many others, also go to Al Anon meetings. It is very helpful in dealing with our addicted children. You can do a google search and find local meeting sites.
Your daughter has to admit she has a problem and want help. That is very key. That is when you can support them. When they are just wanting to stay out there using, you can not help by support. This support is automatically turned into supporting their drug habit. I would point blank ask her is she wants help for recovery or if she is not ready. If she is ready, there are NA groups, AA groups, rehabs, counseling and other resources to help her in her battle. My son is trying to fight his own battle and has chosen to go to a methadone clinic. I don't recommend this method as they can and eventually do become addicted to methadone. However, it isn't my battle, so I am just happy for today that he is fighting in some way. He sees doctors and counselors there which have encouraged him to go to NA or AA. He hasn't chosen this yet, but he could change his mind.
Most people say that you can't force them into rehab. I believe you can't force them into recovery, but there are still advantages to either going to rehab or going to NA or AA meetings, even if they are being made to go. You see, if they go to one of these and get the knowledge about their addiction and the tools that are at their disposal, then later when they are ready, they know where to go and what to do. To me, this is important even if they are not ready to use the tools quite yet. So, if you give her an altimatum to come home and go to rehab or no help - she can benefit. Even if later she shows she isn't ready, abuses you and drugs, and you have to relinquish any support. When they are put out on their own, they soon fall and get into perdicaments and yell for help. Let them feel some consequences and they will soon enough want to try those tools for recovery. It is awfully hard, but we do it one day at a time and with the benefit of God's grace and mercy.
God bless!
Lois
Your daughter has to admit she has a problem and want help. That is very key. That is when you can support them. When they are just wanting to stay out there using, you can not help by support. This support is automatically turned into supporting their drug habit. I would point blank ask her is she wants help for recovery or if she is not ready. If she is ready, there are NA groups, AA groups, rehabs, counseling and other resources to help her in her battle. My son is trying to fight his own battle and has chosen to go to a methadone clinic. I don't recommend this method as they can and eventually do become addicted to methadone. However, it isn't my battle, so I am just happy for today that he is fighting in some way. He sees doctors and counselors there which have encouraged him to go to NA or AA. He hasn't chosen this yet, but he could change his mind.
Most people say that you can't force them into rehab. I believe you can't force them into recovery, but there are still advantages to either going to rehab or going to NA or AA meetings, even if they are being made to go. You see, if they go to one of these and get the knowledge about their addiction and the tools that are at their disposal, then later when they are ready, they know where to go and what to do. To me, this is important even if they are not ready to use the tools quite yet. So, if you give her an altimatum to come home and go to rehab or no help - she can benefit. Even if later she shows she isn't ready, abuses you and drugs, and you have to relinquish any support. When they are put out on their own, they soon fall and get into perdicaments and yell for help. Let them feel some consequences and they will soon enough want to try those tools for recovery. It is awfully hard, but we do it one day at a time and with the benefit of God's grace and mercy.
God bless!
Lois
Hi frightened mom. I am sorry to hear about your daughter and I hope and pray that she is ok and with you soon. I am 27, and have been on heroin for 12 years, I have an 8 year old son. I have recently started on a methadone programme, and this time I am going to give it my all.
Your daughter is very lucky to have you, and right now all that you can really do for your daughter is just be there for her, which is exactly what you are doing. I don't know what I would have done, had my own mum not been there for me!
If there is anyway you can get to your daughter, then go for it, but speaking as an addict, there are no guarantees that she will accept your help. When you are an addict you are numb to your own feelings, so you are not concerned with how other people feel, but like I already said, having someone there for you makes a world of difference. Don't feel bad about not sending your daughter any cash, believe me you have definately done the right thing. Keep positive friend and be there for her when she is ready for you.
God bless.
Love from Claire.
Your daughter is very lucky to have you, and right now all that you can really do for your daughter is just be there for her, which is exactly what you are doing. I don't know what I would have done, had my own mum not been there for me!
If there is anyway you can get to your daughter, then go for it, but speaking as an addict, there are no guarantees that she will accept your help. When you are an addict you are numb to your own feelings, so you are not concerned with how other people feel, but like I already said, having someone there for you makes a world of difference. Don't feel bad about not sending your daughter any cash, believe me you have definately done the right thing. Keep positive friend and be there for her when she is ready for you.
God bless.
Love from Claire.
Many thanks to Lois & ClaireG for your concern & thoughtful words; Lois, I will pray for your son too & hope this a big step towards full recovery; but you are right...it is his battle & he has to fight it his way; This site has been so good for me because I have no one here to talk to this about; as I am in & out during the day & evening, I usually stop to check it, and somehow it helps me get thru the day....as I wait to get a call from her. Your prayers are very much appreciated!
We will all be praying. Let us know when you hear from her!
God bless!
Lois
God bless!
Lois
Oh, Mom, I read yr post & felt SO BAD 4 u, But there is HEAPS of wise advice & support on this site. Important thing 4 u to realise is YOU ARE NOT ALONE & this IS NOT YOUR FAULT. Yr. girl is probably feeling absolutely ashamed of herself;that could be why she has not admitted to you what is going on. I am a 20+ yr addict, I've borrowed $ from my Ma, etc. but my sense of shame about my self is so great I feel if I told her what was what it would break her heart. My bro was on crack & it nearly killed her;I can't let her know what I am.(He is sober now) I am trying to sort myself out. I live 7000 miles from my Ma sometimes I think it is best she can't be witness to this idiocy I am in. Keep posting & I hope it all works out for you. Problems w/ this drug are a LOT more common than anyone lets on. It's the concentrated shame...keeps us from talking. Bless you.
Dear Frightened Mom,
I just wanted you to know that I'm thinking of you and your daughter and keeping you both in prayer. If you want me to copy your posts over to the families board, I would be glad to. It is nice to get some advice, direction, and support from both. When I started on this board, there was no families forum. I'm glad the moderators started one. It was much needed, but I have also been helped a lot by the addicts themselves to understand what my son was going through.
God bless!
Love,
Susan
I just wanted you to know that I'm thinking of you and your daughter and keeping you both in prayer. If you want me to copy your posts over to the families board, I would be glad to. It is nice to get some advice, direction, and support from both. When I started on this board, there was no families forum. I'm glad the moderators started one. It was much needed, but I have also been helped a lot by the addicts themselves to understand what my son was going through.
God bless!
Love,
Susan
Hi, frightened mom, just checking in to see how you are today and let you know I was thinking about you and your daughter. My daughter was addicted to meth and the worry and fear was more than I could stand...alone. But coming here helped me, and I hope it helps you too. Sometimes just talking to someone who understands is a big relief, though we still hurt. Praying that you hear from her soon. luv corrinne
hi everyone: I am feeling a little better today because she tried to call me last night, but I missed her call. she then called her dad & they talked. basically, she wanted money...said she was starving & had no food. he could hear a guy talking in the background to her, so we know the story; he volunteered to make arrangements online for her to have access to a grocery store card for only food, but she ended up getting mad with him & hung up. I am so hoping she will try calling me again later today...last night I was in a bldg where I have no cell phone reception. tonight, I will not leave my home . thank you, Susan for voluntering to copy my posts on the family board...that would be so great and Corrinne for your kind words. things are looking up....at least I know she is alive! take care, Love, Judy
Hi, Judy. Glad you heard from her. It's so frightening when you don't have a clue if they're okay. The hardest time for me was at night...your mind just spins. It's got to be hard with her so far away cause you can't get a good grasp on what's really going on. Just know that we're all here for you...and we will all pray for her. luv corrinne
Dear Judy,
I'm glad you heard from her and know that she's okay. I wanted to be sure you knew that someone did transfer your original post over to the families forum too (before I got the chance to get on today!), so you'll have more wonderful people helping you.
I know when my son was in active addiction, I let him have my cell phone because he couldn't afford one and that little stinker would only answer when he wanted a ride or he needed something. He would let me hanging for hours and hours, sometimes even days, without knowing if he was still alive! How horrible this drug is! The good news is that once he got free of the drug, my "old" son came back! :) With God all things are possible!
Love,
Susan
I'm glad you heard from her and know that she's okay. I wanted to be sure you knew that someone did transfer your original post over to the families forum too (before I got the chance to get on today!), so you'll have more wonderful people helping you.
I know when my son was in active addiction, I let him have my cell phone because he couldn't afford one and that little stinker would only answer when he wanted a ride or he needed something. He would let me hanging for hours and hours, sometimes even days, without knowing if he was still alive! How horrible this drug is! The good news is that once he got free of the drug, my "old" son came back! :) With God all things are possible!
Love,
Susan
Hi Frightened Mom. So glad that you know that your girl is ok.
Her father did the right thing by not sending her cash, the reason she got mad was because luckily her dad saw what she was up to. But you don't need me to tell you that. My own mother has gone through exactly what you are going through now, but at least your daughter is bothering to cantact someone, I went months at one point without calling my mum once, she was so worried. This drug makes you so selfish, if your daughter is anything like I was then she probably has every intention to start trying to sort herself out, and call you etc., but time passes by so quickly while you are using. Before you know it a month has gone by and so on. I wish you all the luck in the world. Pretty soon your daughter will need her mum, and you are doing the only thing you can right now which is be there for her.
Good luck and God bless.
Her father did the right thing by not sending her cash, the reason she got mad was because luckily her dad saw what she was up to. But you don't need me to tell you that. My own mother has gone through exactly what you are going through now, but at least your daughter is bothering to cantact someone, I went months at one point without calling my mum once, she was so worried. This drug makes you so selfish, if your daughter is anything like I was then she probably has every intention to start trying to sort herself out, and call you etc., but time passes by so quickly while you are using. Before you know it a month has gone by and so on. I wish you all the luck in the world. Pretty soon your daughter will need her mum, and you are doing the only thing you can right now which is be there for her.
Good luck and God bless.
Dear frightened mom,
sounds like she is trying to play you and her dad for some dope money.I feel bad that she does'nt want the help yet.we can only pray that she hits rockbottom without anything too bad happening to her.dont give in to her for as long as you do she will never stop till she is dead.but i would still try to get her home somehow .
sounds like she is trying to play you and her dad for some dope money.I feel bad that she does'nt want the help yet.we can only pray that she hits rockbottom without anything too bad happening to her.dont give in to her for as long as you do she will never stop till she is dead.but i would still try to get her home somehow .
Hi claireG & bruceb: I was beating myself up about missing her call on Tues. evening, but I have to realize that she was calling me for the same reason...to get money to buy more drugs; also, I am trying to remember that I am not dealing with my beautiful, young daughter anymore, but the monster that has taken over her body & mind; I have not heard from her in 3 days; I am trying to keep myself busy & try not to think about it every second of the day; the weather here is lovely, I have family coming for Easter holiday, so somehow I will try to relax a little bit. This is going to be a long haul, I know, so I am trying not to stressburn too much. I hope you guys are doing well I love your support!
