Love this, have lived this....
RAISING BOYS
a) For those with no children - this is totally hysterical!
b) For those who already have children past this age, this is
hilarious.
c) For those who have children this age, this is not funny.
d) For those who have children nearing this age, this is a
warning.
e) For those who have not yet had children, this is birth
control.
The following came from an anonymous mother in Austin, Texas...
Things I've learned from my boys (honest and not kidding):
1.) A king-size waterbed holds enough water to fill a
2000-sq.-ft. house
four inches deep.
2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them
with roller
blades, they can ignite.
3.) A three-year old boy's voice is louder than 200 adults in a
crowded
restaurant.
4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is
not
strong
enough to rotate a 42-pound boy wearing Batman underwear
and a
Superman cape. It is strong enough, however, if tied to a
paint can, to
spread paint on all four walls of a 20x20 ft. room.
5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is
on. When
using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball
up a few times
before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a
long way.
6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn't stop a
baseball hit
by a ceiling fan.
7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the words "uh oh," it's
already too
late.
8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
9.) A six-year-old boy can start a fire with a flint rock even
though a
36-year-old man says they can only do it in the movies.
10.) Certain Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a
four-year-old
boy.
11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same
sentence.
12.) Super glue is forever.
13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you
still can't
walk on water.
14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
15.) VCRs do not eject "PB & J" sandwiches even though TV
commercials
show they do.
16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.
19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic
toys
do not
like ovens.
20.) The fire department in Austin, TX, has a five-minute
response time.
21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make
earthworms
dizzy.
22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.
23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
24.) 80% of men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and
brake fluid.
Cowgirl,
Laughed myself silly. My boys are past this age. I will however have to put the clorox and brake fluid under lock and key now.
Laughed myself silly. My boys are past this age. I will however have to put the clorox and brake fluid under lock and key now.
LOL
Husbands are just big children.
Husbands are just big children.
Thanx for the birth control advice Lisa x
ROFLMAO x x x
ROFLMAO x x x
Thanks for that, I have a copy of that somewhere... I sent it with my wife to my sisters baby shower, where she read it out loud... Very Funny.
Regards,
Tom
Regards,
Tom
Cowgirl/Lisa.... Hi just wanted to tell you that this really made me laugh it can be true of girls also my youngest and some of her friends seemed to always come up with something... Like trying to jump off the roof on to a trampoline and throwing paydough balls at the neighbors house to see if it really would stick.. LOL.. but my son was even worse he tried to build a house with a hedge clipper I ran out as soon as I heard it.. and poor thing cut the end of his finger off.. ouch..scared me badddddddd luckily they could reattach it... he was always in to something.. Anyway thanks for the laugh..Have not talked to you in awhile and I hope you are doing ok.. I keep up with you thru your posts..Talk to you soon ...
lol... I know what you mean Paula. My kids are lucky to have grown up. Some of the stuff they got into and tried to do, I still get the ebyjebys just thinking about it.
How are you doing?
Love
cg
How are you doing?
Love
cg
WOW... Holy Crap.... It does smoke........
Tom..you didn't.... oh you are too funny. Men are so predictable.
cg
cg
Does it matter if it's 30W or 40W?
oh man i feel like an idiot i actually was writeing down brake fluid and clorox bleach so i would rember because i was going to give it a try then i got to the end of the thread and said to myself[dam i just got punked]lol.
vinny, vinny, vinny,
Just go ahead and mix those suckers together. You know you want to. And take a photo so I can show my husband and then I can get my clorox back.
Gina
Just go ahead and mix those suckers together. You know you want to. And take a photo so I can show my husband and then I can get my clorox back.
Gina
thats a good one, having grown up with three sisters and then having three sons i can relate.
gina i really wonder if that would work it sounds logical,my luck it would blow up in my face and give me a instant afro[lol]
vinny,
Everything else she wrote in that post was true -- especially a cat's ability to throw up twice its body weight -- so why not the clorox and brake fluid? But you're not going to believe it til you see it yourself and I admit a little curiosity, too (this is the result of living with three guys...no, four, cause our nephew is visiting. Male cooties are clearly catching).
Do it outside, stand back, wear a respirator, have a fire extinguisher and the telephone with the fire dept. number on hand. (Awww, Mom, you're taking all the fun out of it). And don't forget the camera. I want my clorox back. Now.
Gina
Everything else she wrote in that post was true -- especially a cat's ability to throw up twice its body weight -- so why not the clorox and brake fluid? But you're not going to believe it til you see it yourself and I admit a little curiosity, too (this is the result of living with three guys...no, four, cause our nephew is visiting. Male cooties are clearly catching).
Do it outside, stand back, wear a respirator, have a fire extinguisher and the telephone with the fire dept. number on hand. (Awww, Mom, you're taking all the fun out of it). And don't forget the camera. I want my clorox back. Now.
Gina
Lisa,
This is so true about boy's. But A couple of weeks ago I found out that a 2 y/o girl can tippy-toe and reach the microwave, push the button to open the door, push numbers after putting her Mr. Incrediable toy in the MW, and push start. The horrible smell that fills the house lasts for days and reminds you not to let her out of sight even for a minute.
Love ya,
This is so true about boy's. But A couple of weeks ago I found out that a 2 y/o girl can tippy-toe and reach the microwave, push the button to open the door, push numbers after putting her Mr. Incrediable toy in the MW, and push start. The horrible smell that fills the house lasts for days and reminds you not to let her out of sight even for a minute.
Love ya,
I just love that kid, lol.
And the balls being thrown at the ceiling fan, we've done that. And yes I said we, I participated too. (well jeez, it was a nerf) Love, Kat
And the balls being thrown at the ceiling fan, we've done that. And yes I said we, I participated too. (well jeez, it was a nerf) Love, Kat
