Hi guys, my heads been in turmoil, but for once it's something that is nothing to do with me. My mum and dad have been visiting me, along with my great aunt and uncle. It was great to see them but my mum dropped a bombshell on me that has blown my rather fragile world apart. Apparantly my dad, who I had a rock solid belief in, has been having an affair for the past 11 months. My mum has known about it since last October, and my dad, who I always believed to be honest and upright and honourable has just lied and lied, and has put my poor mother through absolute hell. He seems to be totally obsessed with this woman, and is more or less torturing my mum with his sordid affair. I would sooner believe that pigs had flown to the moon than believe that my dad, who has previously been totally dedicated to our family would do something like this. It's completely out of character. He's normally rational and level headed, and wouldn't do anything to risk breaking up our family.
I feel like getting on the next plane and battering 7 shades of s*** out of this woman. JUST for the hurt this affair has inflicted on my mother, who is the most gentle loving soul on the planet. It probably wouldn't change anything but it would make me feel better, My parents have been married for 46 years. My dad appears to have gone insane (hopefully temporarily) but my mum isn't giving up on her marriage, even if my old man doesn't seem to think he's done anything wrong. He even sent this slag pictures of my daughter. That makes my blood boil. His last phone bill was 700!!!! I cant bear what's happening to my family. My mum has asked me not to say anything to my dad. I wish I didn't know, but I guess my poor mum had to speak to someone. It's totally wrecked my head.
Anyway, had to get it off my chest, but unfortunately talking about it hasn't brought me much relief...
love
diff xxx
Diff, don't know really what to say honey, life can throw some major crap at us sometimes.
I wasn't the best mate to my hubby when I was using, now I'm trying to make things better.
You and your mom are in my prayers....I hope things get better soon.
{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}
I wasn't the best mate to my hubby when I was using, now I'm trying to make things better.
You and your mom are in my prayers....I hope things get better soon.
{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}
What the hell's going on, Diff? FORTY-SIX YEARS? This is your dad so I can't say objectively, Diff, but yeah he's lost it. Indicated by the way he sent pictures of the baby to this person. How the heck old is this lady? They're playing house. It's like pretend cause she knows your dad is married, right? Your mom is the WIFE plain and simple. Means that lady ain't jack. Thrill seeking? I don't know, Diff what happens.
Diff, I am so sorry. Like Janet I don't know what to say and it had to tear ya apart. You've been there for your mom though, Diff. That's what counts.
Naw, man ya can't beat her down, Diff. Get on a plane to beat the snot out of some woman don't deserve your time of day. I just don't even know, babes. I'm very sorry. So sorry.
Diff, I am so sorry. Like Janet I don't know what to say and it had to tear ya apart. You've been there for your mom though, Diff. That's what counts.
Naw, man ya can't beat her down, Diff. Get on a plane to beat the snot out of some woman don't deserve your time of day. I just don't even know, babes. I'm very sorry. So sorry.
awww I'm so sorry Diff for you and your poor mother. That's some heavy stuff to be dealing with. It's A very sad thing to hear about. I've got no words of wisdom but, you and your mum will be in my thoughts.
Diff,
I know from experience that say 80% of men cheat and woman too for that matter. My Mams husband has cheated on her on numeruous occasions, tried it on with my cousin, tried to kiss my Mams best friend, she caught him kissing her best friends sister on her sofa when she was in bed, he had an affair and told her on Christmas Eve and left her to spedn Christmas with his mistress. I hate to watch this but my Mam chooses to put up with this and so he knows he can get away with it and as far as I am concerned he will do it again and probably already has. I am disgusted because I wouldnt dream to put myself through this.
Heres another one for ya...One of my friends was sleeping with my other friends partner. It started 3 year ago and only ended recenctly when everything came out. The one who had the affair has a daughter and is married and the girl who's boyfriend it is, well she was pregnant when it started and is pregnant again to him. She also found out the same day that she find out about the affair that he had also slept with someone else and apparently tried it with my mates Mam.
As far as I am concerned it dont matter who the bloke is they will do the DO and its dirty, naughty and I hate it!!
I really feel for you Diff because you have enough on your plate as it is but all I can say is suuport your Mam and be there for you. If she chooses to stay with him and forgive him, well basically there aint anything you can do about that as you know but your support will be appreciated by your Mam. I am sure she is going through such a touch time right now and to have you there for her will make all the difference.
My Mam actually moved in with me after the affair and I am ashamed to say that I knew she would go back eventually so I had to ask her to leave because I couldnt stad to live with her to start with. Am sorry but I didnt smoke and I had a very clean home and she was just sitting on her a** smoking all day in my home and I suppose I thought well you let him get away with it time and time again so what else did she expect. I did support her in other ways but she has chose him many times over me and the rest of her family and to tell you the truth, I wouldnt miss the man if he was dead!! Sorry but I just dont like this bloke!!
Anyway probably didnt help you at all but its a little story for ya to think about. I know its probs hard because its your Dad too!!
You take care anyway hunny...be strong!!
Love Lynds xx
I know from experience that say 80% of men cheat and woman too for that matter. My Mams husband has cheated on her on numeruous occasions, tried it on with my cousin, tried to kiss my Mams best friend, she caught him kissing her best friends sister on her sofa when she was in bed, he had an affair and told her on Christmas Eve and left her to spedn Christmas with his mistress. I hate to watch this but my Mam chooses to put up with this and so he knows he can get away with it and as far as I am concerned he will do it again and probably already has. I am disgusted because I wouldnt dream to put myself through this.
Heres another one for ya...One of my friends was sleeping with my other friends partner. It started 3 year ago and only ended recenctly when everything came out. The one who had the affair has a daughter and is married and the girl who's boyfriend it is, well she was pregnant when it started and is pregnant again to him. She also found out the same day that she find out about the affair that he had also slept with someone else and apparently tried it with my mates Mam.
As far as I am concerned it dont matter who the bloke is they will do the DO and its dirty, naughty and I hate it!!
I really feel for you Diff because you have enough on your plate as it is but all I can say is suuport your Mam and be there for you. If she chooses to stay with him and forgive him, well basically there aint anything you can do about that as you know but your support will be appreciated by your Mam. I am sure she is going through such a touch time right now and to have you there for her will make all the difference.
My Mam actually moved in with me after the affair and I am ashamed to say that I knew she would go back eventually so I had to ask her to leave because I couldnt stad to live with her to start with. Am sorry but I didnt smoke and I had a very clean home and she was just sitting on her a** smoking all day in my home and I suppose I thought well you let him get away with it time and time again so what else did she expect. I did support her in other ways but she has chose him many times over me and the rest of her family and to tell you the truth, I wouldnt miss the man if he was dead!! Sorry but I just dont like this bloke!!
Anyway probably didnt help you at all but its a little story for ya to think about. I know its probs hard because its your Dad too!!
You take care anyway hunny...be strong!!
Love Lynds xx
Thanks all, this has sort of destroyed my faith in human nature. If my dad can do somthing like this, well, anybody can. It's so completely out of character. It's the sort of behaviour my dad would normally pour scorn over. My mum says he gets up in the night, leaves her bed to go to this woman. My poor mum, she can't believe a word he says anymore. He keeps saying it's over, but then my mum finds new evidence that it isn't. The way he is obsessed with her, it's sickening. It's creepy. Sooooo not like my dad. I don't know what's going on, and mum is at a complete loss to understand it too. I hope they don't break up, but my dad seems to think he can have it all, and my mum should just put up with it. He seems angry at my mum for trying to spoil his fun, when he should really be begging her forgiveness and trying to make it up to her. He's become devious and underhand when before he was honest and upright. I thought I knew what was important to him, but now I don't have a clue. Would he really risk tearing us all apart, seeing the shame on his childrens and grandchildrens faces, facing being ostracized by all the family friends, just for some woman? 46 years. That's what he's prepared to throw a way. A lifetime of love. It makes no sense to me or my mum.
anyway, that's the way it is, and it's so sad.
love
diff xxxx
anyway, that's the way it is, and it's so sad.
love
diff xxxx
Your exactly right Diff when you say anyone will do it, and its just the same situation as when my partner first took the heroin. I never in a million years thought he would do this and he was always honest with me and now, well not so much now but before he was constantly lying to protect his dirty little secret.
I have also lost my fauth in mankind and I trust nobody! I have learnt from those around me that this is a cruel and nasty world and this is actually the hell in which we all live in. Heaven is where we go when we die and its a much more peicefull place to be in than this living hell.
Listen to me...you would think I was suicidal or something. I do enjoy life but its such a dirty, nasty place with cruel and devious people. You think you know someone but I dont think you ever know someone as well as you think.
Your Dad needs to learn that he cant have the best of worlds and although its a lot of years, if they cant move on from this then they need to move on from each other regardless of the consiquences.
Love Lynds xx
I have also lost my fauth in mankind and I trust nobody! I have learnt from those around me that this is a cruel and nasty world and this is actually the hell in which we all live in. Heaven is where we go when we die and its a much more peicefull place to be in than this living hell.
Listen to me...you would think I was suicidal or something. I do enjoy life but its such a dirty, nasty place with cruel and devious people. You think you know someone but I dont think you ever know someone as well as you think.
Your Dad needs to learn that he cant have the best of worlds and although its a lot of years, if they cant move on from this then they need to move on from each other regardless of the consiquences.
Love Lynds xx
I agree with BunnyRocker on this one I think MOST people will cheat in the right situation.
What's up with this 46 year old woman ya think?
Sorry, Diff I'm so sorry.........there's more to it.....has to be.
Sorry, Diff I'm so sorry.........there's more to it.....has to be.
Bryn, it's their marriage that 46 years. 46 years and they've been through everything together. They should be enjoying their retirement together, but it looks like my dad is enjoying it without her. She stood by him through thick and thin, when us kids were little, and they had no money. When my dad got ill, she was his rock. It was my mum who got on a plane and flew to be by his his bedside when he was working in the states and gota blocked pancreas. The day Kennedy was killed, my mum was crying tears coz he had kidney failure. She gave him everything, wholeheartedly and without thought for herself. And this is how he repays her, for her love. It's insane.
