I have a 16 year old son who is very close to his father since day 1 he was born. My problem now which cannot disclose to any one is that I found out that my husband is using a prohibited drugs. For the past 4 years he stayed at home for he claimed he is no longer capable of working because he is so tired. We have the arrangement that he will take care of the house chores while I will be in charge of the finances for I am currently working.
I am caught with the decision to choose to keep him doing his everyday task hoping one day he gets well on a natural method, the reason is my son wanted to be with him everyday. My second plan which long ago was our plan is to help him recover by admission to a drug rehabilitation center near our place.
Honestly, the decision was so hard on my end. I have no one to ask, his parents totally abandoned him since we got married. I have no one to ask.....
I have questions in my mind, what will I do now? whom will I ask? Please HELP me.
Dear Amazon,
Your husband and son are in grave danger. The typical response is, "I hope they can kick this like a bad habit". That doesn't work - it is called a "half measure". With these kinds of problems, only a full-measure will work. The only thing that needs to change is everything. Unless something drastic changes, I am confident the son will follow in his father's footsteps.
You need to be as healthy as possible if you are to provide the right kind of support. I strongly suggest an Al Anon or NAR Anon meeting near you. If you are a faith-based person, some churches offer programs for families.
I predict you husband, or son, will tell you a series of lies so convincing that you will begin to question your own sanity.
I also have no doubt you are enabling the drug addiction. This is normal for loving, responsible people. The problem is that it is the exact opposite of what needs to happen.
Although treatment centers are a good option, they are often incorrectly considered a "cure all". They are not. They are only a small brick into the foundation of long-term sobriety.
I've known several alcoholics and addicts who found recovery without formal inpatient treaetment. Attend 90 meetings in 90 days, find a sponsor, read the literature, work the steps, perform service work, etc. -- and keep coming back. Often the first few days are rough as the withdrawal is gnarly. This is one benefit of inpatient treatment - they can provide medicine to ease the discomfort of withdrawal.
This is not the kind of problem to take on yourself. This is true for you, your husband, and son. They well may have been able to tackle difficult life problems in the past. This discipline approach does not work when it comes to the disease of addiction. The disease is progressive and fatal if left untreated. Unless an intervention takes place, the only other options are jails and death.
Please message back and provide more specifics. I'd be glad to offer more specific advice. I try to look at this MB at least once a day.
Fly
Your husband and son are in grave danger. The typical response is, "I hope they can kick this like a bad habit". That doesn't work - it is called a "half measure". With these kinds of problems, only a full-measure will work. The only thing that needs to change is everything. Unless something drastic changes, I am confident the son will follow in his father's footsteps.
You need to be as healthy as possible if you are to provide the right kind of support. I strongly suggest an Al Anon or NAR Anon meeting near you. If you are a faith-based person, some churches offer programs for families.
I predict you husband, or son, will tell you a series of lies so convincing that you will begin to question your own sanity.
I also have no doubt you are enabling the drug addiction. This is normal for loving, responsible people. The problem is that it is the exact opposite of what needs to happen.
Although treatment centers are a good option, they are often incorrectly considered a "cure all". They are not. They are only a small brick into the foundation of long-term sobriety.
I've known several alcoholics and addicts who found recovery without formal inpatient treaetment. Attend 90 meetings in 90 days, find a sponsor, read the literature, work the steps, perform service work, etc. -- and keep coming back. Often the first few days are rough as the withdrawal is gnarly. This is one benefit of inpatient treatment - they can provide medicine to ease the discomfort of withdrawal.
This is not the kind of problem to take on yourself. This is true for you, your husband, and son. They well may have been able to tackle difficult life problems in the past. This discipline approach does not work when it comes to the disease of addiction. The disease is progressive and fatal if left untreated. Unless an intervention takes place, the only other options are jails and death.
Please message back and provide more specifics. I'd be glad to offer more specific advice. I try to look at this MB at least once a day.
Fly
