My son, who is 20, has just admitted to an Oxycodon addiction. I know nothing at all about this, and I need advice to help him. He says he does 40mg about once every other day. We are trying to go cold turkey and attend NA meetings. Is inpatient a better option? I think the hardest part is going to be him staying away from his friends. Is anyone recovered, but can still hang out with their old buddies and stay clean. I have done nothing but cry all night long..........
I used 40 mg. Oxycontin 4 times a day. I went into treatment for that. If you have the luxury of insurance, and if he wants to stop, please consider at least a 30 day program. He will learn many tools to stay clean a day at a time.While in-patient, most centers offer family counseling as well. Addiction is a disease NOT a moral issue. If his friends use, they're not going to be much help in him stopping.Repeating myself-HE HAS TO WANT TO STOP USING-OR AT LEAST HAVE A DESIRE TO. Good Luck & God Bless. Val
first ff im sorry to hear about your sons addiction, I now know how hard it is for a parent to see their kid on drugs and my parents have been watching me go through addiction for 14 years now. My mom always said she wished there was something she could do to make me quit she could not, she blamed herself for my addiction, it wasnt hers or my dads fault.
I find that the only person who can quit the drug is the person who takes responsabiity for his/her recovery, Your son said he was using 40 mg every other day, was he using other drugs as well? I see many people recover from oxycodone and other drugs and I see many relapse, I am one of those . It is a daily struggle and addiction never goes away for me, if you talk to people on this site you will see a person quit one drug and start a new one, that could be something to relate to your son. And what about your sons friends are they users too (drinkers, pot smokers etc..) Maybe N.A will help your son find more answers because he is the one that truly needs them, I know if my friends are using I stop hanging out with them for awhile and eventually I made new ones or occaisionally hung out with old ones. Good luck
I find that the only person who can quit the drug is the person who takes responsabiity for his/her recovery, Your son said he was using 40 mg every other day, was he using other drugs as well? I see many people recover from oxycodone and other drugs and I see many relapse, I am one of those . It is a daily struggle and addiction never goes away for me, if you talk to people on this site you will see a person quit one drug and start a new one, that could be something to relate to your son. And what about your sons friends are they users too (drinkers, pot smokers etc..) Maybe N.A will help your son find more answers because he is the one that truly needs them, I know if my friends are using I stop hanging out with them for awhile and eventually I made new ones or occaisionally hung out with old ones. Good luck
I am sorry for your plight. There are many here that have endured addiction to oxycontin and other pain pills. A few in this board are actually living clean and sober lives. One thing that NA emphasises is to find "new faces and new places." Associating with old friends is quite possibly a sign that your son lacks committment to getting and staying clean. It is likely that he has access to the drugs through those friends and without a doubt the peer pressure would be to continue to use. Likewise, I would not be surprised if he has understated his level of usage of the oxys. Addicts do not think in terms of using every other day.
One suggestion I will offer is that you might wish to locate a meeting of Nar anon or Al anon to attend. We addicts often refer to addiction as a "family disease" and there are things you can learn from the loved ones of other addicts to avoid enabling bad behavior.
As to the best approach for your son, I can tell you that I doubt that much would have worked for me at that age, because I was still under the sad belief that I was in control of my life and my urge to use drugs. I was a high functioning addict and finally reached the end of my rope at age 34, at a time when I had the trappings of a successful professional life but was essentially dead on the inside. Your son may reach bottom faster than I did, but an unwillingness to disassociate with his old friends, and perhaps some creative sandbagging as to his level of use would not support the idea that he is truly ready to change.
The key aspect of getting clean and sober is that the addict has to find a bottom and choose to get clean and sober. Once this choice is made, it often takes an addict quite some time to acheive the goal. Another thing said at NA and AA is that we only have to change one thing to get clean and sober and that is "everything." If and when your son gets scared and humble enough to admit that the drugs have beaten him, then he can learn how to get clean and live sober.
I'll leave it to others to offer advice on rehab. Me, I did it in the rooms of AA one day at a time.
The last thing I will offer is that I have a 20 year old neice that has been strung out on Oxy's since she was 16. Her parents tried everyting they could to reach her and at some point, they had to realize that either they let go of her and let her find her own way, or she would drag down the entire family. As the only recovering addict in my entire family, I have watched my niece play her parents like a fiddle during all of this time, always manipulating her way to the next fix or the easy way out of a troublesome situation. Hers will be a difficult life, one that no parent would wish upon a child. Until she admits her powerlesness over the drugs, there is nothing that I can do for her, nor her parents.
I know this is a lot and that is seems overwhelming. I strongly suggest Nar-anon or Al-anon as a means of gathering additional information and building a network of support for you and your family. I apologize for being the bearer of the bad news, but I urge you not to make the common mistake of understimating the significance of the problem. Your son is a garden variety addict, just like me and my neice.
Good luck.
August
One suggestion I will offer is that you might wish to locate a meeting of Nar anon or Al anon to attend. We addicts often refer to addiction as a "family disease" and there are things you can learn from the loved ones of other addicts to avoid enabling bad behavior.
As to the best approach for your son, I can tell you that I doubt that much would have worked for me at that age, because I was still under the sad belief that I was in control of my life and my urge to use drugs. I was a high functioning addict and finally reached the end of my rope at age 34, at a time when I had the trappings of a successful professional life but was essentially dead on the inside. Your son may reach bottom faster than I did, but an unwillingness to disassociate with his old friends, and perhaps some creative sandbagging as to his level of use would not support the idea that he is truly ready to change.
The key aspect of getting clean and sober is that the addict has to find a bottom and choose to get clean and sober. Once this choice is made, it often takes an addict quite some time to acheive the goal. Another thing said at NA and AA is that we only have to change one thing to get clean and sober and that is "everything." If and when your son gets scared and humble enough to admit that the drugs have beaten him, then he can learn how to get clean and live sober.
I'll leave it to others to offer advice on rehab. Me, I did it in the rooms of AA one day at a time.
The last thing I will offer is that I have a 20 year old neice that has been strung out on Oxy's since she was 16. Her parents tried everyting they could to reach her and at some point, they had to realize that either they let go of her and let her find her own way, or she would drag down the entire family. As the only recovering addict in my entire family, I have watched my niece play her parents like a fiddle during all of this time, always manipulating her way to the next fix or the easy way out of a troublesome situation. Hers will be a difficult life, one that no parent would wish upon a child. Until she admits her powerlesness over the drugs, there is nothing that I can do for her, nor her parents.
I know this is a lot and that is seems overwhelming. I strongly suggest Nar-anon or Al-anon as a means of gathering additional information and building a network of support for you and your family. I apologize for being the bearer of the bad news, but I urge you not to make the common mistake of understimating the significance of the problem. Your son is a garden variety addict, just like me and my neice.
Good luck.
August
Hello august how are you today? Im slowly coming out of the fog. Im just glad that I have sponsor who cares and knows me. because some days i feel that the crap im going through is new and my sponsor always tells me That i went through this when i was clean for 16 months so its nice to know that I was able to make it then, i know i can make it now one day at a time.
last week was crazy no matter how many meetings, sponsor contacts,prayer,counselling.. I was in a constant struggle with my cravings,I did not use because I kept playin the tape until the end. By thursday I truly knew what "this too shall pass" meant and now its saturday the cravings are gone, im doing some camping and reading the latest grisham book, i feel better.
I think that whenever i survive a bad time I have it in my mind that I wont have to deal with it again , but then it comes back and that gets me frustrated, on the other hand I remember that i went though it last time and lived . Still its hard so now Im increasing my meetings and next month i can open some meetings, right now im chairing one meeting a week. well thats all take care friend
last week was crazy no matter how many meetings, sponsor contacts,prayer,counselling.. I was in a constant struggle with my cravings,I did not use because I kept playin the tape until the end. By thursday I truly knew what "this too shall pass" meant and now its saturday the cravings are gone, im doing some camping and reading the latest grisham book, i feel better.
I think that whenever i survive a bad time I have it in my mind that I wont have to deal with it again , but then it comes back and that gets me frustrated, on the other hand I remember that i went though it last time and lived . Still its hard so now Im increasing my meetings and next month i can open some meetings, right now im chairing one meeting a week. well thats all take care friend
Hi shaking, good to hear from you! I just wrote you a note under your thread entitled the Addict and Self Pity.
August
August