Need Info Re: Pill Withdrawl, And Advice Too

ok, there is way too much to tell all at once. I will do my best to stick to the major issues. I am 40 yrs. old, I have basically been an addict since my early teenage years. I have been through ALOT. 25 yrs. worth of alot. looking back I can see that my need to alter my state of mind probibly stems from the fact that I was sexually abused by a foster brother starting at aprox age 7-8.
at this point, that matters not. I have, seen it all at one time or another, and I have done just about every drug there is to excess. mainly meth for many years, booze, and a 5 year run hooked on heroin that just about was the end of me. when I got clean off the tar,8 years ago, I started drinking, and did that for about 5 years, then quit that almost 3 years ago. since that time, life has been much better and I have a pretty decent life, better than alot of people. I have a great job, make like 60k a yr. and although I have financial problems from years ago, I am doing better than I ever have. about 2 years ago, I had an injury to my shoulder, and I started taking pain pills, I really have not stopped since. maybe for a little while, but not for any major amount of time. I have quit for a week or two a few times, but not lately. lately, the pills I take are stronger and I take more of them. for a guy like me that was a drug dealer for many years, it is easy to find pills to buy. I mainly take vicodin, perc's and lately oxy's. having been down the opiate addiction road before, I am well aware of what is going on, but I dont know alot about pills specifically. to give you an idea of how much I take, I can make an 80mg. oxy last me 4-5days, shaving it off and snorting it. I dont think its so much the amount I am taking that is the bigger problem, I think its more how long I have been taking them that causes the phisical dependance.
is there anyone reading this that has been in my situation that can let me know exactly what I am up against. like how long and how bad is withdrawl. it cant be as bad as kicking a 5 yr. heroin run in jail. that was brutal. I know I need to kick this pill thing to the curb, but I have been putting it off for way to long now. the days turn into months and months to years, I am sure there are alot of people that can relate to that. I am a smart guy, I have alot of will power, and best of all God has picked me up and pulled me out of much worse places than where I am now. I know I can do this, I have no doubts about that. I just am wondering if I can continue my normal life and kick this at the same time. I have a very important position at my work and really cant take time off, nor do I want anyone to know what is going on. let me know what you think of all that, I am interested to hear what people have to say. its always better when you dont feel alone. take care, and I will check back later, by tomorrow forsure. have a great night, rockstocker1
Welcome Rock!

Wow! You have been through a lot - strong stuff.

Congratulations on making the decision to quit pp's.

I can only tell you my experience with quitting. I was hooked on hydrocodone, any kind I could get, at the end maybe 12 pills of 10 mg. a day.
I quit ct. I felt like I had a really bad flu, there was insomnia, aches, bad leg cramps and twitching, and nausea. It lasted about 4-5 days with the third day being the worst. Not sure about the oxys--they make take longer.
It was Easter, I went through the rituals and celebrations. It wasn't easy, but it can be done. Many here have gone through it.

Can you plan it so that the worse can be done on a weekend?

Really hot baths help to sweat out the toxins and relieve the aches and pains. Drink a lot of fluids--gatorade, ensure, water. Eat bananas for the potassium.

Best of luck to you--I am praying and pulling for you!

Gracie

Yep...what Gracie said. Lot's of people have done it c/t. If you've kicked H, you know what to expect. Hopefully, it won't be as bad. I never snorted oxy's, I chewed them. I was up to 180 to 240mgs. a day and used for almost 7 years. I don't know that the severity of w/ds has so much to do with how much or how long but with how one's body absorbs the drug and how you throw it off. I must have absorbed every mg. I took because as hard as I tried, I couldn't go c/t! I am taking Suboxone. Keep posting. You'll find that you are anything but alone! Good luck....

~Callie~
WOW, I was kinda thinking that more people would reply. maybe I need to ask more questions. does anyone know the answer to this ? when you are tested for drugs in a UA, and you are taking hydro's or you are taking oxy's, do they show up as the same thing ? just opiate's ? I am really interested to know the answer, and nobody I know has it. I will check back soon, thanks, rockstocker1
Rock,
I don't know the answer to your question about testing for opiates. I just wanted to respond so that you don't think everyone is ignoring you.
Don't know what is going on with the board.
Most of the people who helped me in the beginning haven't posted in awhile.
Stay connected, hope for the best!
Good luck!
Gracie
Hey Rockstocker,

I'm almost certain that a UA will show positive for opiates, no matter what kind it is. There may be a way to determine how much you have in your system, I'm not sure about that one. Is there a reason you'd be concerned about which drug is showing up?

~Callie~
Hey rockstocker welcome.............I don't know for sure, but I am with Callie on this...........I think the test will show a positive for opiates. As for continuing your everyday life kicking this drug and still work..........I think it can be done, but I was never productive in any way whenever I tried to get off of em. I would think it would be very hard to continue "business as usual". That's just my opinion and my experience. Wish I had more answers for you.

Hey Callie.....Hope you are doing well tonight!!!!!
If you stop putting the pills in your mouth and up your nose, you wouldn't have to worry about a UA.

Really glad you found us Rockster...hope you stick around and read a few stories. We are so alike, most of us here have been where you are now and have made it out alive. I'm clean because of NA/AA. I couldn't do it on my own and my way wasn't working anymore. Have you been to a meeting yet? Do you have support at home? Anyone you can talk too? Oxy's are a b**** to get off of but it can be done. My last run was on Oxy's and I quit cold turkey. An 80 lasted me about an hour. It wasn't the most pleasant thing I've ever done, but I didn't die from withdrawals and I had hit my bottom, so it was time. I had to be willing to stop putting the pills in my mouth. My willingness came from support and education about my disease. NA gave me that.

Cowgirl
Dear R, I wish I could help you nwith getting off the pills, but I too am in the same boat. If you google hydro or oxy withdrawal you'll find out what to expect. I've gotten some good advice from here and I do beleive that the best thing we could both do at this point is to taper off or go cold turkey. I am in the same situation also of really not being able to be incompacitated for a week, but I know (and with your history) you do to that it will only get worse if we keep on going the way we are. Check my post "May Be Addicted Again" We have alot in common. However I can answer your question regarding the U/A testing; YES! hydros and oxys do show up positive for opiates for up to 48 hours from your last dose. I know this from my experience with my corrections officer. Take care and we can beat this, I beleive in myself and I believe in you! Take care and peace always.
ok posting again. back to read more and feel not alone. its almost funny how a simple message board can make me feel better. jcoonfield, I did read your post before I even posted the first time. interesting situation I must say. Atleast I know that I have not gotten myself in as deep as I have been in before. it's just stupid little pills. yet another thing to add to the list of things I cant do anymore. I swear, I could make nyquil into an out of control addiction. I will never know exactly what my deal is. I cant do anything a little bit. why are we like that anyway ? its rediculous.
I may not have been clear on what my question was before. I was trying to figure out if a u.a. would identify a differance between like say oxy's and vicodin. I dont think they do. I think it just shows as opiates. I know the technology is there to know exactly what you have taken but for the purpose of drug testing, I think it is pretty broad. simply opiates. I always have a recent perscription for some type of pain pill to cover my butt at work if I got tested. I have been tested, and they never say anything. like they are not even testing for opiates. thats kinda weird I think, but it really dont matter. the real problem is not me worrying about loosing my job. i always have myself covered there. the real problem is that once again, I am begining to arange my life around a bad habbit. I have been doing this so long.... not pills, the whole drug thing. I know exactly what is going on, know what to do to get out, know how to avoid this kind of thing ever happening. the last time I did treatment, the counselor would just take her chair over in the corner and sit there and watch. I was teaching the classes. this is not new to me. I just wonder why I dont care about my life this much to go messing with pills like its ok. what is so bad about life that I feel like I have to be altered ? normal is ok, I dont really mind it. its a little boring, but its not that bad. I like that I deal with all my problems head on when I am straight. as they come up, never run away to hide in loadedville as the problems pile up. its almost pathetic.
hey, who here used to be a meth-head ? do you get prettymuch the same high off say vicodin ? I do ! probibly cuz I take much more than I am supposed to, but it blows me away how much they make me feel the same. it makes me think about the big picture and really be skeptical about the whole doctor and pill manufacturer relationship. freakin vicodin are everywhere. they give you vicodin no matter what is wrong with you. my 19 yr. old daughter went to the DR. awhile back because she was sick. had the flu, and she comes back with vicodin. the revenue generated from just vicodin alone in the U.S. has got to be staggering. oh and the insurance company's are getting theyre slice of that pie as well. meanwhile there are litterally millions of people like us that have been sucked into the grinder machine. it makes me sick, these pills do the exact thing to us as the drugs there is a whole "war" against do. its just ok because this is taxed and kicked back and controlled by our great country's political leaders and big buisness. so... here we are sending our little messages, trying to make eachother feel better. sometimes I wish I was really stupid, how complicated could life get then ? I should not say that, wach me fall down the stairs when I get done writing this and bump my head.
wow ! this has turned into a bit of a rant. it is good to vent off a little though.
is this not the place for that ? if not, well .... I am new here. thats my excuse and I'm stickin to it.
have a great day all, and post to me if you have any thoughts on what I have said. I am obviously struggling at this point. thanks to all that have posted in response to my last couple.... take care, R
Good morning R,

We who are addicted are our worst enemies, I know being covered at work seems like a plus, but really, it just makes it so much easier to stay addicted. We think we are so clever when it comes to our ability to make sure we can continue to use pills, it makes it so much easier to stay on the downhill spiral. I know, jeez.. the irony of addiction

I laugh when I read.....

"I swear, I could make nyquil into an out of control addiction"

because it could be written about me.

Still early in recovery for me, I had a few months without pain pills only to start drinking, which is an addiction I thought I had "conquered" many years ago.

I think, I can't be that addicted....I stopped pain pills right, so I'll just have this one drink and then the next night I am loaded again.

For recovery and dealing with the world w/o drugs/alcohol, let me what you discover. I am working really hard on finding my spiritual path ( not necessarily a religious path ), and most times it is a good tool for me.

I am glad you came back and posted. This can be a good place for many to rant and rave. It is not a place w/o controversy. You seem to know a lot about yourself and about addiction, but, of course the really hard work is just quitting and " Stayin quit".

I gotta go. Good luck today!

Gracie

Yes, this is a good place to let off steam. You'll get lots of good advice and there are many open ears around here. I just wanted point out that several of us DID answer your question about UA's showing opiates instead of a specific type of drug. I think you might be concerning yourself with a moot point. If you're addicted and you don't want to be addicted there are lots of options out there. You've already said that you will abuse just about anything so I won't mention opiate replacement therapy. It seems that it would just be another avenue of addiction for you. No simple answers to drug addiction. A good addiction specialist, lots of blood sweat and tears, and an after care program is what usually helps save a lot of people's butts. Good luck!

~Callie~
hey there, I'm back here reading. oh and cali... I agree about the blood sweat and tears part. it's not what we do on the easy days that defines who we are, its what we do when we are under extreme pressure. do we react,? respond ? or run to our pills ? do we go to a meeting ? do we isolate ourselves ? presonally, I dont care for meetings. I dont like sorting through the people that I cant stand to find the ones that can and will help. the only thing I have ever found that I can count on is God. He is always there, never too busy, and he loves us in a way that there are no words to describe. everything good I have ever done in my life has always been directly connected with my willingness to lay down my will and go to him... broken and empty. he picks us up, and covers us with his warm embrace. His mercy and grace is all we really need to get through anything.
I have alot to do, so have a great day, and I will check back later. R
Hey Rock welcome back..............I just wanted to pop in and say that after reading your last couple of post I see such a difference in you and my sister. She abused anything she ever had. She was a alcoholic most of her life and pills most of that time with other drugs thrown in the mix here and there. She developed an addiction for all of it. In the end she had quit everything and was staying with me most of the time so I could give her the stability and support she needed. She died of pnuemonia a little over a year ago, but the damage done to her body was already done by the drug and alcohol abuse and she just couldn't fight it off. She had it for about 5 days before she even knew and by the time we realized something wasn't right the pnemonia had already become septic in her bloodstream. Went to the ER and in 3 days she was gone. I am addicted to hydro or any pain pill for that matter. I just stopped taking them recently. it's amazing how seeing what it has done to my family that I got hooked on em, but life is crazy. The point to my lil story is that I know you already know this, as did my siser, but those lil pills will kill you just like any other drug and I see such similarities in the two of you that it's spooky so I felt oblidged to throw my 2 cents worth in. i know I didn't give you any new information, but maybe something here can be a help.

Keep Posting and Reading!
None of us WANT to go to meetings. And I can find a million excuses not too, but when all is said and done, when I go, I hear everything I need too and alot of what I don't want too and that's when I better be paying attention.
Rock.........i meant to say that there is such a similarity in you and my sister not difference!!! i don't know how I wrote the exact oppositie of what I was thinking! LOL!!
Dear Rockstocker, Hey, it's me. Good to see you posting. When you said "it's just supid little pills" we still have to remember that they are still a drug. A class 3 federally regulated drug. Any opoiate is a derivative of heroin, they have the same major ingredient that H does...opium.Iunderstand what you mean when you say you can't do anything a little bit. This is a very common side effect of our disease...addiction. So you are way not alone when it comes to that. "Arranging your life around a bad habit" is called proccupation with chemicals: Thinking, planning arranging ways to get a fix. You said your counselor would sit in a chair, it sounds to me like you did not receive adequate counseling. How do you feel about this? What kind of treatment did you get? Inpatient or outpatient? There are alot of good outpatient substance abuse centers to go out there. Inpatient worked for me, 4 months of it. You not only get away from the drug but you go through classes to learn about and the effects of drugs, why a person chooses to use drugs how good a sober life can be and how to be ok with sobriety plus a variety of other classes. If you don't feel like you received adequate counseling you may want to try again. You asked if anyone was a meth-head. Yes, I am a recovering meth-head. I did meth for 23 years and if I take enough of my vicodin I get kind of the same effect I have not determine if this is physical or psychological. One thing I do know that it is NOT good. Also, when you go to meetings, it's not a good idea to focus on who you like and who you don't like, just focus on yourself and quit making excuses of why you don't want to go to meetings. Meetings are a tool to help maintain our sobriety. Recovery is in a way like owning a car, there are certain things that we have to do to keep our vehicle in good working order. Its good posting with you, I hope you post back soon. Take care and peace always. P.S. Let's get ourselves to a meeting, maintenence is important for people in our condition. Always, JC