Hi everyone, I have just returned from the family education weekend at the rehab where my 16 year old son is for heroin addiction. The past two weeks have been a blur. The whole range of emotions! He will be finishing rehab at the end of the month and has been recommended for extended care. Anyone have thoughts, recommendations or, most hopefully, success stories to share about what worked? My husband and I are overwhelmed, especially when some of these programs run over 10000 a month! We have always planned for him to go to college and we don't want to bankrupt ourselves. Thanks!
Hi, come on over to the family forum. We sent or daughter away at 17 and I'll come back to tell you about it, but it's too hard to do from my phone, so tomorrow!
Peace... MomNMore
Peace... MomNMore
Hello again,
We sent our daughter away for her cocaine addiciton and after a hospitalization in a psychiatric facility, a stomach pumped for alcohol, and a wrecked car on her way to get her license...funny, NOT! She had been a white-hot mess for two years running and we were exhausted at trying to stop her from hurting or killing herself...accidentally or deliberately. It cost us $5400 a month for 16 months and she did get much better, learning a lot about herself and gaining tremendous insight into addiction.
That said, within a month of leaving rehab she got raving drunk, DUIed, and was jailed. She was 2000 miles away and I flew down, bailed her out and brought her home where she began doing more 'research'...smoking pot, drinking...and then using heroin. She became a full-blown IV user. At 25 she is now clean, has her own home, a 2 year old, and a steady job.
I maintain that being in LT rehab helped, and she says it saved her, but that she still had more to learn, hence the relapses, peaks and valleys. Some people have very deep bottoms, others not so much...they can off at any floor on the way to the bottom floor, but it's a choice only they can make. Don't expect miracles...they are only done, when they are done. Rehab settings are false and do not approximate the real-life situations they face when they get out...it's easy to stay clean in rehab, hard to maintain for the rest of your life. Kids usually think they can 'get well' and then use 'just a little' because they will be able to control it with their new-found knowledge...they have to learn it for themselves and it can be a long and painful process.
Go into this with your eyes wide open and no expectations. I will keep your family in my prayers.
Peace ~ MomNMore
We sent our daughter away for her cocaine addiciton and after a hospitalization in a psychiatric facility, a stomach pumped for alcohol, and a wrecked car on her way to get her license...funny, NOT! She had been a white-hot mess for two years running and we were exhausted at trying to stop her from hurting or killing herself...accidentally or deliberately. It cost us $5400 a month for 16 months and she did get much better, learning a lot about herself and gaining tremendous insight into addiction.
That said, within a month of leaving rehab she got raving drunk, DUIed, and was jailed. She was 2000 miles away and I flew down, bailed her out and brought her home where she began doing more 'research'...smoking pot, drinking...and then using heroin. She became a full-blown IV user. At 25 she is now clean, has her own home, a 2 year old, and a steady job.
I maintain that being in LT rehab helped, and she says it saved her, but that she still had more to learn, hence the relapses, peaks and valleys. Some people have very deep bottoms, others not so much...they can off at any floor on the way to the bottom floor, but it's a choice only they can make. Don't expect miracles...they are only done, when they are done. Rehab settings are false and do not approximate the real-life situations they face when they get out...it's easy to stay clean in rehab, hard to maintain for the rest of your life. Kids usually think they can 'get well' and then use 'just a little' because they will be able to control it with their new-found knowledge...they have to learn it for themselves and it can be a long and painful process.
Go into this with your eyes wide open and no expectations. I will keep your family in my prayers.
Peace ~ MomNMore
Hi and welcome!
I too was addicted to heroin,but as an adult,not at 16. I am one of the fortunate ones and I am here to tell you there is hope for your son and your family.
Love your son,but be firm. If you are not, he can & will take you and your family for a heartbreaking ride you will not enjoy.Like MomNMore said he will be done,when he is done,regardless of how many programs/hospitals he goes to.
MomNMore knows first hand as do alot of other parents here and I wholeheartedly agree that you need to be over on the Family Boardoard. There are loads of wonderful,moms and dads there who have learned about addiction because of their children and because of their strenght and determination some are celebrating their childs victory against addiction.
My thoughts are with you.
Granny 2 3
I too was addicted to heroin,but as an adult,not at 16. I am one of the fortunate ones and I am here to tell you there is hope for your son and your family.
Love your son,but be firm. If you are not, he can & will take you and your family for a heartbreaking ride you will not enjoy.Like MomNMore said he will be done,when he is done,regardless of how many programs/hospitals he goes to.
MomNMore knows first hand as do alot of other parents here and I wholeheartedly agree that you need to be over on the Family Boardoard. There are loads of wonderful,moms and dads there who have learned about addiction because of their children and because of their strenght and determination some are celebrating their childs victory against addiction.
My thoughts are with you.
Granny 2 3
First off, you guys should go to alon meetings. They will help you guys. And what does your son think? My 24 yr old boyfriend just did 70 days in treatment and has been succseful. Im 70 days clean myself doing outpatient while on suboxene. If he does not go, he needs to do 90 meetings in 90 days, get a sponser, do stepwork, get a NA book, have sober support ( other than family, so fellow clean addicts will understand him and vs vera. ) i would continue treatment. Yea, its pricey. But can u put a price on his life? I hate to put it like that. But, most of us who reapse are instatutionalized, commited or end up dead. Not saying he would relapse, but futher treatments not going to hurt anybody. Im not doubting him at all. But the diease is so hard to deal with. Wr just need all the tools, resorces and sober support we can get our hands on.i hope you find the answers and advice your looking for. Good luck, and we love you!!!!
Re: Your son that is getting out of heroin rehab center soon. Our son went into a 30-day program & he agreed he shouldn't come back to the town (our home) where he began using. He decided to go into a "mens sober living house" (500-miles away from our home) & stayed 2-months. To rent a room is approx. $700 + per mo. (depending on how nice it is). Usually they share a room with 1-2 other boys/men, but not always. You have to be careful tho, as some say they drug test frequently & don't, most say the men have to be out of the house 3-4 hours per day (working, looking for work, volunteering, working out @ gym), attend at least 2-3 AA/NA meetings per week. They have daily chores in the house. Talk to other kids/parents whose kids are there. After living there 60-days we decided to let him come home, as he was getting really depressed & missed our family. S.CA kids were hard to "relate to", compared to our small, little mountain town where most are so friendly & "everyone knows your name". To be honest tonight is our son's 1st night home (Xmas eve). He knows he has to get a job immediately, attend AA/NA meetings almost daily & we're going to drug test! It's his first time & thru "tough love" it will be his last time to fall to this awful drug. We've known way too many families who have lost loved ones to Heroin. If he chooses this life again, our doors will be locked. Praying our son stays strong, remains happy with his sober living & most of all remembers all the days/nights he cried while using drugs, going thru detox, then Rehab. Praying for your son too. Merry Christmas!
Thanks for all your good thoughts and prayers. I will definitely move over to the family board....and check out alanon/naranon meetings. We will definitely be keeping our son in treatment ....hopefully for at least a total of one year....we're looking at Turning Point in Ct which has an extended care program going into sober housing. He should be able to finish high school and get into college....God willing!
