New To The Site

Hi all! I'm new to this site. My problem is that I am addicted to hydrocodone. I have been on and off of it for over 10years and abused it every time. I abuse whatever drug I am prescribed. I have just now accepted that I am an addict after years of denial and my family telling me to get off the stuff. But, I "was in pain" so that justified to me taking the pills. I am 37, 5'9" and weigh 125 pounds. Last month when I got my scripts filled I went through 240 percocet fives, 60 soma, and 60 xanax ( 1mg) in about 2 weeks. I have since went off the percocet because they made me mentally unstable and very forgetful. I have replaced that with loritab 7.5. My brother was over one day and I had no pills so I was going through withdrawls (which I have never been through before) and he told me that it was withdrawl that I was going through. I get my meds for Chronic Daily Headaches. They will last up to 7 days. I got so mad at him and told him he did not have my pain and did not walk in my shoes and to stay out of it. Something told me to research withdrawl on the internet and guess what, I am an addict. My problem is now that I don't even think I have headaches. I think that my brain tells my body it is sick so I will put the pills in me. Is this possible? The only time my headaches act up is when I have no loritabs. I don't sleep for days, I sweat, shake, and twitch, and my head will hurt so bad that I have to go to the hospital. Should I try to go off of them to see if what I suspect is true? I'm afraid to tell my doctor so I really need advice.

Thank you!

I just want to be "ME" again
Hi me
Welcome. You said,
The only time my headaches act up is when I have no loritabs. I don't sleep for days, I sweat, shake, and twitch, and my head will hurt so bad that I have to go to the hospital]
That sounds like withdrawal to me. Honey, if you are going thru that many pills a month, you are addicted to them Talk to your doctor about detoxing. Get some help. You don't have to do it alone. Keep comin back.
Sounds like you're one of us...that's a good thing. Means you're not alone.

That many pills in 2 weeks? Yep, you're an addict and yes, you are abusing your meds.

Please tell your dr that you want help getting off the drugs. Cold turkey from the loritab won't kill you but coming off of that much xanax could. You need help tapering off of them. You're dr should know what's happening...you can't protect that source. Actually, he should be shot. That's a lot of pills.

So, question is, how willing are you?

Cowgirl
Welcome. You are among friends and fellow addicts. Keep posting while you have had this moment of clairity. You are probably (most likely) addicted. At least you have seen the light.
Welcome sweety,As hard as it may be a good starting point(besides this board)is to LET your Dr in on it,I had to confess going through over 300 pills a mth to my Dr but it made Trying to recover easier & he works with me.
please dont think Im comming down on you cause Im not...but your headache could be your addiction.I know that doesnt make much sense but having headaches is giving you a reason to use.Like I have pain from Chrons & it made it easy to get pills that way.BUT with headaches Ive heard that after awhile the pills can actually cause the headaches.
I really feel talking with your Dr & explain to him your fears,what you would like for yourself etc,may be a good starting place.he may slowly wean you off the pills not just stop them.
Welcome to the board I hope we can be of help to you,,,,,mj
I am in tears right now. Thanks for replying to my post. I actually have people that understand and have been through this and that can give me insight. I really need the support. Right now my husband sets out my meds every morning and if I use them all by noon, then I get no more. I am learning to control them. I have a very loving and supporting husband. By the way he already knew. Everyone knew I was an addict except for me. I have always been a free spirit and I let my mind get weak. I need to get back to me. But like most addicts, I can not see life without my pills. I know what I have to do, and that is my goal. I get vacation in may and that is when I plan to detox. Right now I am doing my 2 xanax , 2 soma, and 4 loritab 7.5 a day, which is what I am prescribed and I have some withdrawl from dropping down so fast. I go to all kinds of narcotic addict sights to see what people are going through and it helps me so much. Since I have replys to this site I now have a bond here and I know you guys will help me through this. I can not thank you enough. The thing that gets me is that on my first visit to my neurologist he did not know me, did not require any previous medical records at all and prescribed me 240 percocet fives, 60 1mg xanax, and 60 soma on the first visit with 5 refills each. Fortunately pharmacies to not honor refills on percocets or I would have gotten them refilled too. Percocet is a horrible drug. When I was taking it , I was in such a depression that I did not want to live anymore. I'm glad I don't take those anymore, but honestly my body could not handle them.

Thanx guys- you're the greatest!

Well I must say I am very proud of you.Realizing you have a problem is THE HARDEST step (to me)some people NEVER admit to it & loose themselves totally.All the fears & stuff you have...we have had & ALOT of us still have them.
I was so scared that I wouldnt be "ME" anymore without the pills,but what Im realizing now is that I wasnt really me.I lost alot of who I am to pills & Ill admit its nice getting to know the real me again.
You may feel lost right now & that is normal,but a part of "THE REAL YOU"knows that the pills are slowly killing you.And its the "real you"that made you reach out to us.Believe me you are among friends & I know that we will try to help in anyway we can.being able to talk about this with people who are living it will help so much.
and it doesnt have to be BAM no more pills,it will be a slow process but one that will change your life for the better....HANG IN THERE & PLEASE KEEP POSTING.....mj
Yes, it sounds to me like you are addicted to them, what you describe is classic withdrawal symptoms.

The good thing is, you want to stop, and you have already found some support here.

Talk with a doctor about what is the best way for you to get off these meds. Xanax should never be stopped cold turkey, as the others have said.

Keep posting, You will find great love and support on this board, I promise.



me~ Welcome! We have all been where you are and some of us in even worse places at time so don't feel ashamed to tell your feelings thoughts ideas etc here... this is the safest place for you to be! We all understand and trust me you won't be judged! My DOC was oxy's perc vic anything that was opitate and I was on them heavily for 3 years and now I have been clean exactly 3 weeks today! I did it c/t which may be right for you may not.. if you do c/t you need to get a list of otc meds etc... I would say if you can talk to your doctor about it do that! C/T is hard but it can be done skeeter and I are proof :0).. Just remember we are all here to help you in anyway we can! New people are what helps keep us clean! Helping you will help all of us! So please stay on the board we welcome you with big HUGS (((((((((((()))))))))))))))
Sounds like you already knew you were an addict and had a big problem, long before you came here. Admitting to another person (even online) is the first step to getting well.

You have the support at home which is HUGE, but what about telling your dr? Don't lose your momentum...call him today. Start this ball rolling now.

You can detox off of the loratab but I'm concerned about the xanax. Be really careful with that.

Hope you stick around. There are a lot of very supportive people here.

Cowgirl
definitely withdrawals pooky.
and the great thing is : they are only temporary.

we are all alike here in this sense, opiate addicts - - and many of us have stopped taking the drugs we once felt like were necessary for survival... only to find life much happier w/o them - and most importantly healthier.

we all support you here, we love you so much & embrace you with our open arms !!!!

i was taking lorcets everyday for many many many months ... i was a baby when it came to w/ds - but finally decided to turn it around, handled the w/ds (still alive!), and in 3 weeks (22 days) feel like an incredible, healthy person. i'm happy, i don't need pills, i don't want pills. i hate pills, in fact.
this board is an amazing place to talk & let your feelings out...discuss the way you feel - vent, or cry, or laugh, or whatever.... the beautiful thing is we know EXACTLY how you feel inside. don't be afraid.

ditto on cowgirls comments, though. if you want to get off a lot of xanax, you will need help....
hi me....................the headaches are called rebound headaches.............i had them also..............well.......me...............you came to the right place..........i recieved several postings that help push me right over the edge to contact my doctor and begin detox..............i have been struggling with a strong vicodin addiction for ten years and i came to this site and all of a sudden my thinking stated to change........i think these folks in this message board are angles sent from God to help us...............how else would i explain the big change in my brain about the way i feel about vicodin...............i hate vicodin now and i see this is as a war for my life and it is empowering to have people pulling for you..........and encouraging you.............your not alone...........i am thumper and i am addicted to vicodin badly and the withdrws are so bad for me my body jumps around and i can't stop it...............i tried hot baths with epson salt and then put vics vspor rub on my chest and neck after and drink lots of water.........
wehn you have withdraw brush your teeth alot and take alot of hot baths.........
it really does help...........i have evern taken a hot shower every hour....and for some reason it help.................listen to some beautiful music or your favorite songs while you in the bathroom...........
i love michael w smith........"like a rose"............and i also love "prince" and
watch a movie also............... like walk the line............ and ray they helped me to see folks with addictions and over come the addictions..........
i am a mess right now myself..........i am sick and my tummy hurts...........
but i want to reach out to you...........and to others..................
i love the folks in here............they are like life jackets.............put it on
your not alone......................
God Bless you honey
love thumper
Hey me again, normal people dont sit around wondering if they are addicts ok so if you think you are one of us you probably are and in the right place. I know about xanax withdrawals my last dose of that was 30 of the 2 milligrams and I came off of them cold turkey and had a seizure which I expected because I had had them before coming off of them. So be careful and talk to your doctor about getting help coming off of them. I could never just stop on my own but found myself in a place where I had overdosed on those and methadone 9 times and knew I had to do something fast before I died and that is what would have happened. I think the xanax withdrawals are probably the worse then again they say methadone is hell to come off of especially cold turkey So I had a double wamy on me but it took me about ten months of being horribely sick and gettting through it without using. I am so greatful that I did it cold turkey because I will never forget the hell I went through coming off of them and always remember those long nights with no sleep and shaking and throwing up and just loosing my mind. So it is possible to come off of what you are on but still see a doctor. Out of love and concern,
April
Please DO NOT ATTEMPT to cold turkey the xanax. Seizure while very serious is a possiblility there are many others also. Ummm like death? I ended up in the hospital for 3 days detoxing from xanax. They told my husband I could have a heart attack, seizure, stroke or die.

You should talk to your doctor about a taper, or maybe someone will come along with the link to tapering off benzos. I can't repeat enough times do NOT COLD TURKEY OFF XANAX PLEASE!!!!
Welcome,
My addiction started with chronic daily headaches as well. Funny how things change so fast isn't it. The very medicine that was once helping you is now hurting you.
Welcome to the board. I hope you stick around and post.
julieeee
The good thing about the xanax is that I abuse it so much that my 60 pills are gone within a week and a half to 2 weeks. I actually go for 2 weeks a month without them. The only withdrawl I get is tingling of my hands and feet. I do not take them consistently. I don't think going off them will be a problem due to the fact that I only take them for 2 weeks a month. I just got my script filled and my husband gives me 2 a day. The strength is 1mg. I have been breaking them in half instead of taking a full pill. I just need to make sure that I don't take them EVERYDAY I guess. If I am wrong please let me know what I can do better about taking them.

Thanks!!
Hey again, If you are not taking them at two weeks at a time I can not see you having withdrawals from them but I am not sure and would not recomend you doing anything without first talking to your doctor. I know they have a medication they gave me when I was in treatment one time that stopped me from having seizures. How long have you been on them? I am just curious. I am glad you made it here and keep posting. We are always here for you.

Out of love and concern,
April
Hey there Me-again,

I just wanted to welcome you to the board. I am all too familiar with percocet addiction. I am prescribed perc's my husband is prescribed vics. It has been a hard battle for me, but one I know I have to overcome or my life will not be as full as I know it can be for me and my husband and daughter.

I hope you continue to post here during and after YOUR battle.

Stacey
I just wanted to welcome you to the board, as you can already see, you are among friends. So - a big welcome... much support here!

One bit of advice - SEIZE THE MOMENT - it seems like you are at a point where you are ready. Withdraw under a doctor's supervision, expecially the benzo (sorry I can't recall - Xanax?) That way, you can get some help for things that happen during withdrawal, like sometimes your blood pressure is affected, etc.

I have been trying to taper down from lortabs on my own, and did make some progress, but I finally realized I could not do it alone, and have an appointment with an addiction doctor this coming Monday, thanks in large part to this board's support and certain good friends here kicking my butt (through the computer screen, of course) when I needed it. SO - SEIZE THE MOMENT - start this process now, while you are feeling like you want to get off the merry-go-round.

Love
Sue/Enester
If your habit has been to take the xanax for only 2 weeks and now your husband is holding them and giving them to you every day...you're taking them more than you did before and therefore will be harder to get off of them. You really need to let your dr in on what you're doing. He might have a better plan for the xanax.