Hi Everyone,
Thanks for all the welcomes and I hope you all had a good day. I did go to a mtg. this morning for the first time in months which is located across the street from my house. True to form, they argued about if there should be "men only" or "women only" groups. Evidentally an all men's mtg. has been trying to get going with much opposition. In any case, it was nice to visit with this small group that I've always enjoyed as they are very true to their heart and their sobriety and realize that while AA keeps them sober, that there is also "other" life out there as well.
I visited with my sister and her husband who have just moved here from New Orleans (just had enough of the hurricanes) and are regular users. Her hope was to buy a house in the woods and get sober on their own but after years of daily pot smoking, narcotics, anti-depressants and alcohol, it's just not going to happen. They make no effort to hide it from me and although I do not get the "urge" to participate, I still wish they'd be more respectful to the fact that I am trying. My family thinks that I am so much stronger than I really am but that comes from hiding my alcoholism for so many years. "I NEVER knew!!!!" "Who would have thought?"....and so on. It wasn't until my liver gave out and I almost bled to death from esophageal varicies that it was discovered.
Anyway, are there any all female or male groups in your areas and how do you feel about that? How do you also feel about opposite sex sponsors? I have my own opinion on that as well. I feel if you connect with someone and you understand each others views, connect both mentally and emotionally that it doesn't matter what sex the person is. I am still looking for a sponsor and am open to any suggestions you may have.
Thanks so much! Have a great night.
Hi Newme...in my area we have a variety of meetings...most co-ed but there are women's meetings and men's meetings...there are even meetings for Spanish-speaking only, gays and lesbians, and mentally ill who are also addicted. They have their own day/time/place...2 women's meetings were particularly instrumental in my early sobriety...
As for the sponser...I might be "old-fashioned" but I was always told (and it worked) women stay with women and men, men. The problem could be that "feelings" get involved and that can cause its own set of problems. I always had a woman sponser...there were a few men who had solid time and sobriety that I would talk with...especially recovery and the Steps...but I stuck with the women...Just my experience....
Keep going to meetings...getting phone numbers...calling people...getting involved is so important...and helpful in the beginning...Love Gina
As for the sponser...I might be "old-fashioned" but I was always told (and it worked) women stay with women and men, men. The problem could be that "feelings" get involved and that can cause its own set of problems. I always had a woman sponser...there were a few men who had solid time and sobriety that I would talk with...especially recovery and the Steps...but I stuck with the women...Just my experience....
Keep going to meetings...getting phone numbers...calling people...getting involved is so important...and helpful in the beginning...Love Gina
Ditto what Gina said, I didn't like Women's Stag meetings at first, now I absolutely love my Thursday night Women's meeting...they are carrying me through what I am dealing with in regard to my youngest daughter...my phone is always ringing and offers of dinner, driving, just sitting and talking just keep pouring in...I don't want to do this thing alone (of course I always have God), but I love the Fellowship. VWGirl (posting under my sister's Rachel's name ~ I spent the night)
Hey Newme
I'm Zac and i come from New Zealand and just wanted to say gidday and I've ben sober since the 24 march 1996, one day at a time and I've done meetings for first 5 years and stopped for next 3 years my gratitude got me through and now I'm back doing meetings and also sharing on this message board which all helps my recovery immensely.
Do whatever you have too to stay sober because it is the most beautifullest thing to be a part of life again.
Thankyou for posting your experience,strength and hope as it helps my recovery to share in others recovery as well.
I haven't got a sponsor and our meetings are small only 4 or 5 people so 'm not much help there but i have talked to people about issues and i did have a lady friend in Recovery who i could yap to for a while till she moved away so whatever you decide is cool as long as it is beneficial to your recovery.
Light and love Zac
I'm Zac and i come from New Zealand and just wanted to say gidday and I've ben sober since the 24 march 1996, one day at a time and I've done meetings for first 5 years and stopped for next 3 years my gratitude got me through and now I'm back doing meetings and also sharing on this message board which all helps my recovery immensely.
Do whatever you have too to stay sober because it is the most beautifullest thing to be a part of life again.
Thankyou for posting your experience,strength and hope as it helps my recovery to share in others recovery as well.
I haven't got a sponsor and our meetings are small only 4 or 5 people so 'm not much help there but i have talked to people about issues and i did have a lady friend in Recovery who i could yap to for a while till she moved away so whatever you decide is cool as long as it is beneficial to your recovery.
Light and love Zac
Hi Zac!
Nice to meet you. Congratulations on your length of sobriety. And to think I had it licked at 6 months.....Ahhh the grandiosity of the alcoholic. I am in the USA - Michigan. Pretty cold out already but on my way to walk my dog because it's good for her figure and my mental well being. :-). I did go back to a meeting this past week but it was the same old thing. There are parts of the Big Book I agree with and some I just don't and to not agree 100% and follow it to the tee is sacreligious here. I am just more open minded and opinionated than most of the folks around here. Mostly because of my personality but I also think it's due to the fact that probably 95% have never left this town and I did for over 16 years. My exhusband was in the military so I met all kinds of people, had experiences these people have only dreamed of and lead a different life. So, I continually try to meet them half way, ACCEPT they will probably never understand me and my open mindedness and do what I need to do for me to keep sober and at this point alive. I am also pretty ill. Double whamy...
Again, thanks for writing to me and I would enjoy keeping in touch. You seem to be well respected on this post so any words of wisdom or a simple hello will be well received. Have a great evening (I think it's probably evening there....)
Jill
Nice to meet you. Congratulations on your length of sobriety. And to think I had it licked at 6 months.....Ahhh the grandiosity of the alcoholic. I am in the USA - Michigan. Pretty cold out already but on my way to walk my dog because it's good for her figure and my mental well being. :-). I did go back to a meeting this past week but it was the same old thing. There are parts of the Big Book I agree with and some I just don't and to not agree 100% and follow it to the tee is sacreligious here. I am just more open minded and opinionated than most of the folks around here. Mostly because of my personality but I also think it's due to the fact that probably 95% have never left this town and I did for over 16 years. My exhusband was in the military so I met all kinds of people, had experiences these people have only dreamed of and lead a different life. So, I continually try to meet them half way, ACCEPT they will probably never understand me and my open mindedness and do what I need to do for me to keep sober and at this point alive. I am also pretty ill. Double whamy...
Again, thanks for writing to me and I would enjoy keeping in touch. You seem to be well respected on this post so any words of wisdom or a simple hello will be well received. Have a great evening (I think it's probably evening there....)
Jill
